A Rose for Remembrance
By Fyre
TITLE: A Rose for Remembrance
AUTHOR: Fyre
EMAIL: Fyredansa@hotmail.com
SUMMARY: A year after 'Hero', Cordelia says goodbye.
FEEDBACK: Hey, if you like it, please comment. If not, I'll go and sulk in the corner.
DISTRIBUTION: Just YGTS and here at the mo...but anyone can have it :-) Just ask nicely ;-)
SPOILERS: Only 'Hero' really.
COUPLE: Cordelia/Doyle
RATING: G
DISCLAIMER: Let me get this clear - if I owned these guys, do you THINK I would waste time writing? Ho no! ;-) These chaps and chapettes (chaps preferred) belong to Joss Whedon and all the other companies involved with the TV show. I should have asked for permission to use them, but I didn't and its too late now, so please don't sue me cos I'm poor!
CLASSIFICATION: I could write more...possibly an explanation. I'm useless. I know :)
NOTES: A challenge from YGTS that I just couldn't resist *sniff*.
_________________________________________
It was like a scene from a classic black-and-white movie.
A single woman standing beneath on of the street lamps, the beam of buttery-yellow light spreading around her, rippling over the folds of her long jacket, her dark hair swirling around her in the off-shore breeze.
The scent of the sea was mingled with the scent of diesel fumes, the scent of the docks, of the ships, of a place she hadn't been in nearly a whole year.
Hands in her pockets, she pulled the coat slightly closer around her, the biting chill raising a rash of goosebumps all over her body. Terminal uneasiness also could have contibuted to the chilling feeling.
One step forward, she raised her dark eyes, shivered, the memories of the night, so many months before, returning in vivid detail.
She had always thought that the darkness was the evil thing and that light could only ever be used for good. That night had taught her a painful lesson about light and darkness. That light could kill.
Would kill.
Did kill.
Brushing one hand over her cheek, she caught thetears that inevitably rose, crystal clear, a drop in the proverbial ocean.
Her dark and brooding employer knew of her tears, would have shared them himself, but vampires didn't cry...did they?
Her shoes tapped on the rough stone of the dock as she walked, tucking wild strands of hair carefully behind her ears, a small smile rising at the memory of her companion and how much she had cared for him.
How much he had cared for her had been proven.
And she had never had the chance to tell him how she felt.
Maybe - she mused - that's why he lingered, haunting her dreams and daydreas, every thought filled with his smile, his dancing blue eyes, his easy and friendly manner and the way a single look from him could make her heart flip head over heels.
Night after night, she had found herself curled on the sofa, comforting herself with a tear-jerking old movie and gallons of ice cream, Phantom Dennis watching over her to make certain she didn't do anything stupid.
Before her, the hull of the ominously familiar ship loomed, her stomch twisting uneasily, the metal slick with algae and the slap of the sea against the black-painted sides, the sound of the sea the only thing that broke the silence around her.
Stiffening her spine, she walked forward, paused. Everything about it looked the same, only she longed for it to be the previous year, when they could have got to the light-source before it had gotten to them.
On the gangplank, her legs and resolve weakened. Did she really want this?
Of their own accord, her feet carried her forward, the material of her jacket brushing against the barriers around the edge of the deck, directing her towards the dark opening that lead down into the cargo hold.
Still dark.
Climbing slowly down the rungs of the ladder, the girl moved to the centre of the floor, looked up at the spot where it had happened, where the darkness had lost its battle with the light, where her friend - her love? - had been the victim of the light.
Not the victim.
The martyr who stepped out of the shadows to save them all.
Maybe he was still here. Maybe he could still hear her, see her, know how she felt about him, how she had always felt about him.
Withdrawing a candle from her pocket, she set it on the rolling floor and lit the wick carefully, the faint golden glow dancing on her features, not a harsh, murderously pure white beam this time. "I did love you." She began hesitantly.
*Too bad we'll never know if this is a face you could learn to love.*
"I miss you, Doyle. Half-demon or not, you were still Doyle."
*I've rejected you way before now! So, you're half demon. Big Whoop! I can't believe you'd think I'd care about that. I mean, I work for a vampire! Hello?*
"I know I never told you."
*You t'ink I'm a nice guy?*
"Normally, I think it, I say it...but the first time I didn't dare to say it, I lost you."
*Maybe you don't actually have zero potential.*
"It's hard being on my own again. I don't have you there to make me smile, like you used to."
*Is t'ere a trick ta t'is?*
"I know I have Angel and Wesley, but they don't...they can't treat me like you used to."
*How about it, Princess?*
"No one can."
The delicate flame flickered in the wind that whistled through the hold, making the girl shiver, rubbing her slim hands together in an attempt to stem the cold.
"You didn't even stick around to see Angel turn into his big bad self."
*Once upon a time there was a vampire. And he was the meanest vampire in all the land...*
"You must have been the only one of the people that knew him who never saw that."
*Are you soul-having again?*
"And I thought of you when he was trying to scare us...um...okay, he wasn't trying. He really was scaring us. I kep wondering what would Doyle do...apart from run from cover." A small laugh. "But I know what you would have done. You would have tried to protect me. As usual."
*Hey! I'm the one you followed here. It's me you want.*
"You always did that. Almost got yourself killed so many times, just for sticking up for me."
*Ooh! The Mick's got spine. Maybe I’ll snap it in two.*
She paused, sighed deeply. "I guess that's why I came here." She finally said, her voice soft, trembling with the threat of more tears. "It's taken a year, Doyle. A whole year for me to see why you did what you did, to see that you wanted us...me...to live."
A tear dangled from her lashes, dropped down her cheek, her fingers twisting together as she swallowed another sigh.
"I'll never be able to forget you, you know. You're only person I know who would drink so much and still look adorable with that little beer gut you had."
*Let's celebrate with a drink at the pub!*
"You even looked kinda cute with all those spikes...but don't tell Angel...he always thought I had strange taste." A long pause. "I came here to say good bye, but its never really going to be goodbye, is it?"
*I'll take care of ye, Princess.*
"I'll always love you Doyle, in a strange way and I'll always miss you, but I have to keep my life going. After all, neither of us wants me to end up like the Broodmeister, do we? He does enough lurking in the dark for both of us." She sniffed back a soft sob. "Take care of yourself and try not to get yourself in trouble."
Wiping her cheeks with the tips of her fingers, she forced a small smile. She had done what she came to do. Blowing out the candle, she returned to the ladder, left the hold bathed in the comforting darkness.
The dock was still deserted, the faint corona of peaches and golds starting to peek over the horizon to the east, the warmth of the day the beginning of a new day - of a new everything for the girl.
Cordelia's footsteps tapped away into the coming morning, her mind and heart finally at rest as the sun flickered over the massive metal edifice that she had just departed from, streaks of colour shimmering on the painted surface.
And in the cargo hold of the ship that had seen the death of the second man she had loved, the warming light flickered over a single blood red rose that she had laid on the spot in the centre of the smooth floor, as a final gesture to the half-demon she had loved.
A rose for remembrance.
Back to the Character Index
Back to the Title Fictions