Bobby and the
Originals by Iceguy
I can’t believe that I’m the only one here. Maybe I should ask the professor where everybody went? Nah, they’re taking care of a threat, so it’s likely to be on CNN anyway. There’s an idea. Food and TV. Better get my rec. room time in now, cause as soon as these students get here there is not going too much of it available soon.
Deciding, that it is now indeed time for food. Bobby helped himself to a few sandwiches from the kitchen, and turned on CNN. Sure enough; Jean, Logan, and Warren were fighting some kid called Warp Savant.
"What the hell kinda name is that? Warp Savant? Come on. At least he’s got some nifty effects working for him. Well, that’s where they are. Time to do something else."
Bobby wasn’t exactly sure if the professor’s "No food in the lower levels rule" was still being enforced. He still decided to finish his last sandwich before going downstairs.
Ah yes. The "lower levels." I never did understand why I am the only one who finds those words funny. Oh well.
Bobby walked around familiarizing himself with the compound again. It has been a couple years since he was last in these halls. Even though everything was the same as after they rebuilt it, after Bastion cleaned house, he still walked as though everything was brand new.
Man. It has been too long since I was here last. How is it that everything here, even the secret area’s get rebuilt the exact same way as they were before? That is about the weirdest thing I have seen to date. Coming from me that’s probably not as impressive as some of what the others have seen.
Just then. A familiar sound echoed throughout the corridors. A very, loud and familiar sound of an aircraft landing.
"Sweet! Somebody is here!"
Bobby runs straight into the hanger and stops dead in his tracks
B: "Hey! Where’s Hank!"
W: "Yeah nice to see you to Drake."
B: "Shut up tweety"
W: "Grow up Drake"
B: "Go away George Michael."
J: "Bobby!"
B: "See, why can’t you be more like our wonderful redheaded wonder over there and be all happy to see me?"
Warren stands there mumbling to himself
J: "Warren, be nice. Leave Bobby alone."
B: "Yeah, leave Bobby alone."
J: "So are you back now too?"
B: "Yup"
W: "Oh great"
B: "Aww buck up Warren you know you’re happy to see me."
Warren continues to mumble
B: "So, anyway. Jean where’s Hank?"
J: "I don’t know. He’s not here? Do you know, Warren?"
W: "I haven’t seen him since Christmas, Jeanie"
B: "Damn."
W: "I’m sure he’ll be here soon enough Bobby. Maybe Logan knows?"
L: "Huh?"
B: "You know the question I’ve asked like three times already? Where. Is. Hank?"
L: "Oh sorry. Wasn’t paying attention. Too busy staring at Jean’s ass."
B: "Ok, that was a little uncalled for. But do you know where Hank is?"
L: "What was the question again?"
B: "Jesus Christ man. What the hell is wrong with you?"
L: "huh?"
J: "Logan, stop staring at my ass!"
L: "Oh sorry Jeannie. Hank is with Storm, secretly gathering Destiny’s journals or something."
B: "Secretly?"
L: "yeah"
B: "and you used to work for the CIA?"
L: "I think so. I’ll figure that out in September."
B: "Riiight…"
L: "Get lost Drake."
B: "No, you."
L: "You’re lucky I have appointments elsewhere, Drake."
B: "or what, you pull out your claws and try to scare me?"
Logan walks away. Crying like a little girl. Because nobody likes him anymore.
B: "Finally. How long has he been like that?"
J: "Since Scott came back."
B: "What? Didn’t he die?"
J: "Yeah, but that was his first time in a while so he came back kind of quick."
B: "Right the whole Summers' immortality trick."
J: "Works every time."
S: "What works every time?"
B: "AH! A ghost!"
J: "The Summers' immortality trick"
S: "But I wasn’t really dead."
J: "It’s ok, dear."
S: "Shut up wife. I am the embodiment of all that is…"
Scott faints
B: "Boring?"
J: "Not funny Bobby."
B: "Yeah, you’re right. I’ll come up with something better later though."
J: "He’s having a little trouble adjusting back into his old life right now."
B: "Right. Sure."
Warren carries Scott to the infirmary.
J: "So how come you’re back?"
B: "The professor asked me to come back, and I was really getting tired of being at home, and school.
J: "School?"
B: "I don’t want to talk about it. I went to finish off my other major I was pursuing before I went the accounting route."
J: "Which was?"
B: "I really don’t want to talk about it."
J: "Ok, you’ll tell me later though won’t you."
B: "I’ll try not to."
J: "So, you’re going to be a teacher too?"
B: "Nope, a counselor, and I get to play recruiter too."
J: "That sounds nice."
B: "Yeah, and I get my own study too."
J: "Ok, and that is a big deal why?"
B: "I dunno. It’s mine, and it’s called something that I never did actually try to pursue."
J: "And what is that?"
B: "…you know…study…"
J: "Oh, ok."
For some reason it is not as fun when I confuse Jean. Maybe ‘cause it’s too easy. She does have her ditzy moments.
B: "So what new around here? And why is Warren in a worse mood than usual?"
J: "Lets see. Lately we had to fight these dumb bad guys who called themselves Neo."
B: "So you fought Keanu Reeves? Cool."
J: "No, they were pretty awful. It was so bad that Cecilia became a drugged up killer."
B: "Cece? You’re kidding? Mrs. Priss ‘I don’t wanna be an X-Man’ doctor, became a drug addict?"
J: "Yeah, it was pretty dumb."
B: "Leave it to her to screw up without me or Hank around to hold her back."
J: "Yeah, then Betsy and Warren broke up during Christmas for Mr. Unoriginal."
B: "That new Thunderbird guy?"
J: "Yeah. Don’t get me started on him. He’s has less of an idea on his powers than you did when you were 16."
B: "Damn."
J: "Tell me about it."
B: "Well Elemental powers are supposedly hard to control anyway."
J: "You would know. That and if he tried to use them instead of whining more than Rogue…"
B: "He whines more than Rogue?"
J: "To the point that Rogue even told him to shut the hell up."
B: "Damn. That kid needs to mimic a lemming or something."
J: "Too true."
B: "So what’s up with Hank going to look for Destiny’s diary’s or whatever?"
J: "I didn’t know anything about that. Maybe the professor knows. But right after Christmas, almost the entire team took off."
B: "Who pissed them off?"
J: "Well, they took Neal with them, so it must have been the Neo. And what really cracks it, right after they leave, Scott comes back to the team, we lose Peter, and then Magneto gathers an army on Genosha."
B: "How do you lose a 500 pound steel guy?"
J: "No, Beast came up with a cure but in order for it to work it had to be ingested into a host. And as soon as the host used his powers it would be released into the atmosphere."
B: "Ok…still not seeing the bad…"
J: "Well, when it was released into the atmosphere the reaction was fatal to the host."
B: "Which was Peter?"
J: "Yes."
B: "Oh man. That’s not cool. But at least he died saving the world from that virus."
J: "Yeah the cure was instantaneous, right after that Magneto gathered his army."
B: "Yeah, I watched that on CNN. I called up here to see what I could do, but nobody answered the phone."
J: "Dammit! I told Northstar to watch the phones in case someone called."
B: "You recruited Northstar. Damn, you were desperate."
J: "That wasn’t the half of it. I had to recruit some dumb little kid with see through skin. And some others."
B: "What the hell?"
J: "Then there was that Marine that was invulnerable.
J: "On a good note, Dazzler showed up."
B: "Damn. Well, at least you had some experience with ya."
J: "True. She also informed us that the Mojoverse had been destroyed."
B: "How did that happen?"
J: "It had something to do with the AoA Babies. Whatever the hell those were."
B: "Yeah, sounds pretty stupid. But something that Mojo would do."
J: "Yeah. Then Sunfire’s sister showed up. Let me tell you, if I wasn’t so desperate, I would have shut her mind down, just to shut her the hell up."
B: "That bad?"
J: "Think Jubilee obnoxious level, but replace it with arrogance."
B: "It’s not too late, I’m heading up to Hong Kong in a few days, and I could always turn her into a really nifty Ice statue, and mail her home if you want."
J: "Not worth the mess."
B: "Ouch"
J: "So yeah, me and my little ‘group’ fought off magneto, saved Xavier, and Wolvie dug Magneto’s heart out of his chest."
B: "Well, I guess that’s a plus right?"
J: "Sure. Then all that stuff with Prosh happened."
B: "That was a pretty memorable experience to say the least."
J: "Bobby, I’m going to check on Scott, OK, I’ll talk to you later ok."
B: "No problem."
J: "Could you lighten up on Warren though?"
B: "Awww, but why?"
J: "Come on. Think about it, the unoriginal newbie replaced him. He’s in another one of his moods."
B: "All right Jeannie. Just for you though."
J: "Bye Bobby."
B: "See you later Jeannie."
Bobby followed Jean back up to the mansion levels.
Damn. That conversation made me a bit thirsty, and gave me a headache. Wonder if the Prof. still stocks Mt. Dew?
Just then, Bobby runs into the last person he expects to see again: Ever.
B: "Holy Crap!"
S: "What?"
B: "I swear you are a ghost. You can’t be alive. Not even a Summers should be able to live through that. Not like I’m not happy to see you. You just scare the living hell out of me."
S: "Bobby, I wasn’t dead."
B: "Yes you were."
S: "No I wasn’t"
God this is too much fun…
B: "So, then. How did you live through being merged with Apocalypse?"
S: "I don’t know."
B: "I guess the whole ‘you being a Summers’ thing applies here don’t it?"
S: "I don’t know."
B: "But it looks like it really screwed you up."
S: "How do you figure?"
B: "Where did the chin come from Mr. Douglas?"
S: "Drake. You better start talking to me with some level of maturity."
B: "Or what Squinty? You gonna tell the professor?"
S: "You will address me from now on as Cyclops or Mr. Summers."
B: "Right. As soon as we start calling Jean, Martha Stewart, I think not."
S: "You better hope you don’t get placed in my outfit."
B: "I hope not either. That Jacket is ugly as hell, and plus I doubt it would fit anyway."
S: "Why not try to be a littler serious for once in your life."
B: "Like you?"
S: "Exactly."
B: "You know something? You might be right. I’ve been acting rather childish for too long. Maybe the school is my chance to get my act together."
S: "Finally. Something got through to you."
B: "It took some time. But, now that I look back, I’ve wasted my entire life trying to make people laugh and make light of situations. Maybe it is also time to become the powerhouse that Prosh says I can be."
S: "See. Just a little reason, it’s time to grow up Robert."
B: "Hey, Scott. Do you think you could help me with some offensive aspects of my powers later on?"
S: "What time do you want to meet in the danger room?"
B: "How about Fifteen Minutes?"
S: "I must have second guessed your attitude. I’m glad to see you finally learned some maturity while you were away."
B: "I’m glad you think so Scott."
S: "You better go get ready if we you want to do this exercise before dinner."
Cyclops leaves the kitchen with a smile of accomplishment on his face. He had been the one to get through to Bobby Drake, he thought to himself. He couldn’t wait to tell Storm and show her how much of a better leader he was than she.
B "Apocaclops indeed. Heh."
God I always did love messing with old Fearless. It’s almost as much fun as warren. Speaking of tweety, wonder where he’s off and brooding at? Might as well hang out with him until Hank shows, and Scott gives up looking for me.
Hmmm… where oh where has Warren gone, oh where can he be? Lets see, he’s been dumped by a newbie who has a plagiarism problem, and he’s got his feathered wings back. I better go check the trees, make sure there aren’t any nooses hanging from them…oh bad memory there. Damn Judy Harmon, that is almost as bad as…oh god, a worse one…Opal…Must. Think. Funny. Thoughts.
Scott in a ballerina dress… Scott in a ballerina dress… Funny but not working…I know. Must think a happy thought. Zelda! Ah the blonde mistress of morning drinks and bad poetry…ah wonderful Zelda…must find her…
Man. Too many things to do.
Jeeze. I’m a busy man lately.
Bobby walks outside into the backyard. Still searching for his friend. He was about to give up when he turned to the house and saw him on the roof.
Whoa. Check it out. Warren is going for the full dramatic ‘woe is me’ look. I wonder what is bugging him right now?
Feeling a bit devilish. Bobby sneaks out of view from Warren. Looking around, making sure that Scott isn’t in the vicinity to see this, he changes to his elemental form. Slowly, he starts to shift into a less than solid form, until he completely disappears from human sight.
Man, this is so cool. I’m glad I’ve been practicing this. Came in really handy if I didn’t want dad to find me… But at least now it isn’t so hard to shift like this.
Bobby amends his plan. Instead of just scaring Warren. He now decides that Warren needs to wet his pants. He floats up to where he is directly in front of Warren. He pulls some water molecules together just to give himself a slightly visible form, without revealing too much to Warren.
B: "Hello. Warren."
W: "Wha? Who is up here?"
B: "Nobody is here Warren. Just you and me."
W: "But who are you? Where are you?"
B: "That is not important."
W: "Of course it’s important. What do you want?"
B: "Warren Worthington the third, what do you think you are hiding from?"
W: "Well, I did come up here to get away from Bobby. No telling what he is capable of when he is bored. Thankfully he is nowhere in sight."
Bobby shifts into his solid Ice form, directly in front of Warren.
B: "Man, that was pretty mean."
Warren proceeds to scream and roles down the roof. Catching himself only by the gutters.
W: "Bobby! What the hell!"
B: "What?"
W: "When the hell did you learn to do that? You scared the shit out of me!
Score!
B: "Cool trick huh?"
W: "Not at the moment."
The gutters pry loose from the house and Warren falls 10 feet onto his back.
B: "Damn. Bet that didn’t feel to good."
W: "Shut up Drake."
B: "Alright"
Warren gets back onto his feet after lying on the ground for a few minutes. Bobby drops down off the roof to help Warren up.
W: "So, you still ditching Scott?"
B: "Yeah those Summers are like roaches man, they never leave you alone. Even nuclear war wouldn’t be enough to get rid of these guys."
W: "So true…who has the record now?"
B: "Let see…Scott was merged with one of our greatest enemies, Jean has the cosmic entity thing going for her again, and…have you even seen Alex lately?"
W: "Oh my god. A Summers that has stayed dead? Will wonder’s never cease?"
B: "Oh, I’m sure he’s displaced in time and space somewhere."
W: "Probably. Hey does that mean you’re gonna go after Lorna again?"
B: "Um…no."
W: "Why not?"
B: "Girls’ got issues man."
W: "Damn. All the good ones do."
B: "Yeah man. I’ve had enough of the angst relationships. Remy and Rogue’s was enough to last a lifetime after that trip up to Seattle a while ago."
W: "True, you are the resident expert on the subject. Why do all the psycho’s go for you anyway?"
B: "I don’t know man. I’ve had some good ones too."
W: "Yeah I know."
B: "Did we figure out who has the lead?"
W: "Well, we figured out that it’s not Alex."
B: "That’s right. It’s a toss up between Jean and Scott now huh?"
W: "Yeah."
B: "I’m thinking it’s a tie."
W: "Didn’t you say Jean has the whole cosmic entity thing going on for her now?"
B: "Yeah, but that’s not a big deal."
W: "Why the hell not."
B: "Everybody is one of those now."
W: "Name another Mutant you know, that is a cosmic level being."
B: "Me."
W: "What?!?"
B: "Yup. Little old me is cold incarnate. One of the fewest constants in the universe, besides death and taxes."
W: "Shut up."
B: "What, don’t believe me? How do you think I did that trick a few minutes ago? I can shift into 4 different states. My human form, my ice form, Water, and Water vapor."
W: "You are lying. You have to be."
B: "Ask Jean. She was there when I was told."
W: "Alright. I will later."
B: "OK."
W: "So I guess that leaves Scott slightly trailing, since the only thing he got from Apocalypse were mood changes."
B: "Apparently. Well until Alex resurfaces sometime, ‘cause I don’t think either of them has been dead this long and resurfaced."
W: "True. What was the pool up to?"
B: "The book is down in Hanks lab. Which we can’t get into until Hank is back."
W: "Damn."
B: "Yeah, you’re telling me. The only way I’m going to get away from Scott is with Hanks help. If he don’t get here soon, Scott is going to throw one major hissy fit."
W: "Oh joy."
B: "Speaking of which, I better stay mobile, so he can’t accidentally find me."
W: "Heh. Good luck."
B: "See ya."
Bobby watches Warren fly back onto the roof, and walks back inside. Ducking weaving in and out of every room. Surveying his path for one Scott Summers.
J: "Bobby what are you doing?"
B: "Shhh… I’m hiding."
J: "From who?"
B: "Apocaclops."
J: "Not funny, Bobby."
B: "Sorry…"
J: "Why are you hiding from Scott anyway?"
B: "Oh, he wants me down in the danger room."
J: "Already?"
B: "Yup."
J: "Give him a couple days Bobby, he’s still adjusting."
B: "Yeah, sure. Ok."
J: "Hey guess what."
B: "What?"
J: "Someone you have been looking for, is looking for you."
B: "Zelda?"
J: "Who?"
B: "Oops sorry. Old girlfriend I plan on hunting down."
J: "Alright. But Hank is here."
B: "Where!"
J: "In his room."
B: "Which is where?"
J: "Two doors down from yours."
B: "Bye Jean!"
Before Jean can say goodbye, Bobby is gone. Rushing his way up to his best friend’s room. Extremely excited, he read the nametags on the door, which was something he didn’t notice the first time down the hallway. He stops at a door labeled, Dr. Henry McCoy: Science and Technical instructor, and knocks.
B: "Hey, you in there Hank!"
H: "Do my ears deceive me? Or do I hear the voice of my Frosty counterpart?"
B: "That’s me. Open up man, I bored and hiding from Scott."
H: "Scott’s alive?"
B: "Yeah, that’s just what I said."
H: "I swear the Summers DNA is a contrary to all facts of science and normal common sense."
B: "Yeah, so open the door already."
H: "Just a minute Robert."
Henry ‘Hank’ McCoy a.k.a. Beast, opens the door to an astounded Bobby Drake.
B: "What the hell?"
H: "What is the matter?"
B: "What happened and who did that to you?"
H: "What are you talking about Bobby?"
B: "What’s with the new look? Should I expect talking candlesticks and teapots to come out of your room?"
H: "Why should you expect that?"
B: "You don’t have a mirror in there do you?"
H: "Ok, that’s enough about my new appearance."
B: "All right. Can I come in and hide from Scott now?"
H: "Of course."
B: "Great. Now we can play catch up."
H: "True, you have been gone a long time, and have missed a lot."
B: "Jean told me a lot that happened."
H: "Yes, I was very sad to lose Peter like we did. So lets not discuss that, ok?"
B: "No problem."
H: "Thank you."
B: "So what is with this newbie guy?"
H: "Neal?"
B: "I guess that’s his name."
H: "He’s not as bad as people think."
B: "Jean says he knows less about his powers than I did, when I first joined up, and whines more than Rogue."
H: "Well, yes. But once you get past all that, he’s a really interesting person."
B: "I’m sure Hank."
H: "Well, everyone gives him such a hard time someone has to stick up for him."
B: "At least he’s with Storm. She taught me a lot about my powers. He’s an elemental right?"
H: "How do you know he’s with Storm?"
B: "What’s a nine-letter word meaning idiot?"
H: "Off the top of my head…I’m not sure."
B: "W. O. L. V. E. R. I. N. E."
H: "Damn, he’s supposed to be the liaison between the two teams, and let me guess our short berserker got a little drunk and told you everything?"
B: "Well, actually, he’s taller than I am now, which was funny. I didn’t think his body could produce adamantium to even grow. But he’s a regular 6’ now. Plus, I only got here today. He got off the plane and I asked where you were and he told me. So how many of those diaries have you guys found yet?"
H: "You know the entire situation!"
B: "I guess."
H: "Who else knows?"
B: "Jean and Warren were in the hanger when he told me. Jean probably heard but Warren mumbled to himself the entire time so I doubt he heard anything."
H: "That blasted little, back-stabbing…"
B: "Yeah, dumb Canadian. They just love to screw things up huh?"
H: "Actually I wasn’t going to say that but, sure, I concur."
Both Hank and Bobby begin to sing their new theme song: ‘Blame Canada!’
B: "You know later, you could always hold him down while I force feed him non-alcoholic beer."
H: "Sounds like a fun idea, but I have to meet with the professor later about my ideas for the school, and my role in it."
B: "You and me both"
H: "You’re going to be faculty in the school? Forgive me my friend but you were the last person I’d expect to teach anything."
B: "Well, I’m not teaching. I’m taking the role of a counselor, and recruiter or something."
H: "Jobs you are well suited for, Robert."
B: "Yeah, the Prof. even said I was his biggest success story."
H: "Really? How so?"
B: "Don’t be jealous Hank. He’s talking about the dream and how I had fulfilled it in the terms of living a normal life and coexisting with the normal population or something."
H: "You know, if you had left out the ‘or something’ that would have been a profound statement."
B: "Well, I wouldn’t want to steal any of your thunder buddy."
H: "You’d need a much larger vocabulary if you intended to…"
B: "Yeah and apparently one less finger…"
H: "Yes, apparently that would be so…"
B: "How the hell do you lose a finger anyway? Didn’t that hurt?"
H: "Well actually I was on my death bed when this happened."
B: "Whoa. Slow down."
H: "Not to worry. I’m in good health now."
B: "That’s a relief. But what happened?"
H: "I’m not really too sure. One minute I remember being trapped in Spain by some super police agency, the next minute I’m submerged underwater, and then another I’m with Elizabeth and Rogue fighting some new scoundrel, called Vargas."
B: "Weird."
H: "The worst part is, that when I awoke from unconsciousness, Elizabeth was dead and I looked like this."
B: "Oh shit, Vargas cut off your finger? That’s one sick puppy! Did you say Betsy’s dead?"
H: "No one cut off my finger Bobby. Sadly. Yes."
B: "Well how else did it come off? I mean how does one lose a finger? Does Warren know about this?"
H: "I don’t know. I honestly doubt Warren is aware of her constant state."
B: "I mean, one day you are happy having five fingers and fighting this guy after being underwater or something, and then you wake up and it’s gone? He had to cut it off man. That’s the only way. You’re the scientist here. You should know these things."
H: "Bobby, Please calm down."
B: "Man, I’m away for 2 years. We lose two teammates; a woman I rescue from sentinels in an emergency room becomes a drug induced maniac; Wolverine has a 9 inch growth spurt, which we also have to talk to the professor about making that man wear a shirt; Scott dies and comes back to life; Magneto actually gathers his army of mutants which Jean recruits new mutants to fight and doesn’t bother calling me; and everybody wonders why we never get any new recruits in the team."
H: "Yes, that about sums up you’re entire absence Bobby."
B: "Oh yeah, and my best friend almost dies, loses a finger and wins the Beauty and the Beast look-alike contest."
H: "Please lay off the jokes on my new manifestation Bobby. Please."
B: "Why a little sensitive? Come on man, admit it. You do kinda look goofy. I almost expect you to go into a speech on how everything is in balance here at pride rock. After that, I’m sure we could get that nice Murder She Wrote lady to make us some kickass tea. But I guess you are right. Plus, I have to finish unpacking before we talk to the professor. I want to be done before tomorrow."
H: "Why tomorrow?"
B: "Tomorrow is Saturday Hank. Cartoons man."
H: "But there has been a steady decline in the quality of artistic and comedic animations since 1996."
B: "There is bound to be something on worth watching. There always is, and if not there is always Cartoon Network."
H: "Alright Bobby, I will see you downstairs."