Welcome to the world of the Maintenance Man.


Please park your self esteem at the door and TAKE YOUR GODDAM BOOTS OFF!

We have a few rules around here:
1) If you're right, nobody remembers, if you're wrong, nobody forgets.
2) If you're right, nobody remembers, if you're wrong, nobody forgets.
3) If you're right, nobody remembers, if you're wrong, nobody forgets.

A Morality Play in One Act

Cast:
Maintenance Man as Maintenance Man
Client as Client

ACT ONE: A Place

CLIENT: X didn't do it that way.

MM: Well, how did X do it?

C: Well, I'm not sure, but not that way, a different way, a better way, a cheaper way that smelled a lot better and didn't make as much noise. Not that way. It didn't take so long and he was always happy too. X was like a god in doing it, he made it look easy and it didn't cost so much, and he didn't turn the power off or have a crack problem, or the water, either. He had nicer tools too. He always did it right the first time, and he was quick and didn't make dust or swear when the hammer fell on his head and he liked the dog and the cat and the kids and the neighbours and my Aunt Sally looking over his shoulder and giving him invaluable advice. Not the way you're doing it. A different way. A better way.

MM: Mmmpfrgl X.

C: What did you say?

MM: I said, yes ma'am.

THE END

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