"Oh, Horror!' 
(to the tune of "Titwillow" From _The Mikado_)

In a cave by a river a vampire bat
Squeaked 'Horror, oh horror, oh horror!'
I said to him 'Batty, dear, what are you at?
Squeaking "horror, oh horror, oh horror!"?'
'Is it weaknes from bloodlessness, batty?' I cried,
'Or a rather tough clot in your little inside?'
With a shake of his poor little head, he replied,
'Oh horror, oh horror, oh horror!'

He coughed up some blood as he hung upside down
Squeaking 'Horror, oh horror, oh horror!'
And a tiny stake in his chest made me frown--
Oh horror, oh horror, oh horror!
He sobbed and he sighed and fell with a thud
He died, though I tried to feed him some blood
Twas that hunter's stake that did for my bud!
Oh horror, oh horror, oh horror!

===================================================================
Baron Gideon Redoak  , Keeper of the Sacred Doorknob of Idaho
fraser@library.utoronto.ca

    Source: geocities.com/g_redoak