TWO ZEN WORDS .

. . Remember my pillow talk? "Let the pillow hold your head. Give it up. Stop using any muscle to hold it. As you sit there, let the chair hold your... weight. Give it up. When you walk, put your weight down easy." Be here. You resulted from the same DNA as we all did --as all life did. You ARE here... for now.
. . Look, Earth's 4.7 billion years is a long time --it ain't a lunch break. Chemicals got together in that primeval ocean, and the dice rolled & rolled till four particularly attractive molecules got together and came up with a combination that itself made more combinations. After that, they changed the molecules around, always doin' better or worse than other sets of combinations. And here we are... a supposedly better combination.
. . There's nothing you must do to "deserve" to be here. You *are* here. I do not mean "here's you" & "here's here". I mean... the definition of "you" & "here" is the same thing! As they say, you are an expression of the universe (Earth, anyway). You are not an *intrusion* into the environment, you are an *extrusion from it (like toothpaste from the tube). But you enter the play, stage-left, and eventually exit stage right. The individual you will pass, tho the genetic you is/was/may be here forever. Know your (temporary) place and accept the rightness of it. Evolution has reasons to limit lifespan. DABDA.
. . Whether a god or gods invented the whole thing makes no difference. The bottom line there is that we don't know. It is as it is, either way.
. . What IS the goal? enlightenment... reduction of the weight... no, rejection of the burden. Rejection of the burden.
. . Zen. There are two ways to get to reality: scrape off all the accumulated belief-structures that human societies have accumulated over the past few thousand years, including our inborn tendencies. Investigate and evaluate each one, one at a time. But there are thousands, and thousands of variations on each. And thousands more variations possible.
. . OR... drop everything. Start with what a baby knows. All else is mere invention. All else is mere invention.
. . Born-again religions do a similar thing, but in reverse: they drop all BUT a certain class of reality-belief. It can feel like a relief --a sudden reduction of burden.... And it is... but what are you left with? Reality? NO! That was dropped, in favor of one certain invented view of it.
. . For myself, I'm obliged to run thru the big picture.... Science has lifted the fog that clouded our perceptions of our place in the universe. I find that that helps me. Others don't need it, I guess.
. . Whether a god or gods invented the whole thing makes no difference. The bottom line there is that we don't know. It is as it is, either way.
. . Trouble is... the facts of life are way to simple to sell books. And has too disappointing an ending for people to like. We wanna think it's a big mystery, and that we can escape fate. We keep trying to believe... anything but the truth. Please, somebody, make me believe something else.
. . "Is Buddhism & Zen the same thing? Not at all. What's Tao got to do with it? Tao is parent. Buddhism is grandparent, tho not parent of Tao.
. . Did you think you had to know some Urdu language to understand Buddhism? ...Japanese, to understand Zen? I've always rebelled at that idea. Any concept can be expressed in any language. Other distractions seem to invoke magical thinking.
. . Zen does not have a predetermined view of anything. It goes out of its way to NOT teach (think of koans) because anything taught... IS a view! an opinion, a constructed belief. Reality itself is there in front of you; you don't need an interpreter. You don't need teachers. You don't need metaphors or parables. You are in the presence of reality --drink it in!
. . Can you TRY to get enlightened? That's like saying try real hard to go to sleep, when sleep is almost by definition a *cessation of effort!
. . Who is enlightened, and how do you know if they are? Heck, how do THEY know?! Enlightened people "chop wood, carry water" --as the old description goes. More than that, they argue with people, they get sick, they poop and pee --they make blunders, they get obnoxious, etc, etc. . The character they were born with is still there. Same as us, their character is overlaid with events and efforts.
. . The only people who are really enlightened... are those whom you'd never think are. The only ones you think might be are those who imagine they are and try to make that obvious to other people --you can be sure... they're NOT.
. . But the real ones have worked it out. They know themselves. They know socio-biology --the unavoidable influences they bear from their very genes. Genes don't change. Everybody's got 'em. They dictate that you MUST survive, you must love, you must mate and bear young, you must go thru all the complications that those influences dictate --because our genes dictate actions that either our mate or society says are wrong and even reprehensible. To obey your genes is to reproduce maximally, so people cheat. There is no "other" way --no point in saying this is right, that wrong. We're... stuck with it, I guess.
. . Most people, at one time or another in their lives, will find a way... or take a chance ...to have it both ways. Success is conforming to the drives in the genes --fighting and cheating as best we can, to top other individuals and get the prize. There is no rebellion against it, really. The genes demand such behavior. Tho many successfully obey society's commands instead.
. . Same as other species, we wouldn't exist if we weren't good at survival and reproduction. The enlightened may laugh at the process, but they'll play too, 'cause they "must". The penalty for not playing is too depressing, and the reward for success is so thrilling.
. . I think the feeling that let in the goofy idea of "fate" comes from the above dilemma --that we feel forced to do what feels pre-determined. It was. But not by any cosmic ghost or planetary alignment. It's just those pesky lil combos of molecules: cytosine, adenine, thymine, guanine that make DNA.
. . And we're reproducing ourselves to death. Be fruitful. Genetics rules --it says "You MUST do what --if you succeed well-- will kill us all, and the planet with us."
. . The enlightened seen the river and given up on stopping it. Laughed at it. They know they're gonna die, and... no, they hate it with a passion, same as you do. They'll fight it all the way. But another side of them will laugh at that side, too --at the same time. But... we're stuck with it, I guess.
. . You can study eastern history, ancient languages, & comparative religion... but it won't help. You can memorize all the numbers: 8-fold path, the 3 this and the 5 those. (Actually, that might help. If in english.) But I think that a simple --and constant-- practice of a two-word instruction will do better.
. . Obviously, I don't mean some esoteric pair of words in Urdu or Chinese. And I won't tell you what they are for a while. A real Zen Master wouldn't *ever tell you.
. . I hasten to say that I do NOT claim enlightenment... but I'm in an unfortunate life-position that gives me a better view of the matter than I had before. I've seen the light --trouble is, it's far, far away and keeps going on and off. But I remember, not long after my diagnosis, walking in a parking lot. I'd look down at my legs... walking... as if they weren't mine. It was autonomic --I could divorce myself from it all, and go right on walking.
. . There's no wood to chop or water to carry now, but I carried mail, shopped groceries.
. . You remember how we've done the exercize of walking to noplace in particular, & paid extreme attention to every step, every breath. Maybe that helps, but as [Twain?] said: "Nothing settles a man's mind as much as knowing he'll be hanged in the morning."
. . Lemme tell ya... that prospect got my full attention! I began to live eternities between steps. Seconds divided into micro-seconds, and I knew each one. I went out to get the mail, and man, was the sky blue. Wasn't the grass alive. I walked out of a store with groceries, and knew my little life was so small and insignificant in the unimaginable sweep of time. Just one of 100 billion creatures we could call human, who occupied their tick of time upon the stage.
. . It sounds dramatic, I know, but it was truly stunning. It's easy to practice: send your arm and hand an order to, say, touch your earlobe. Then, divorcing your mind from the control of the event, watch your hand move. Did you *fully let go of the hand and arm, as it moved? Trust it, it can work. Give the arm autonomy. Let go.
. . Here it is. I think... enlightenment is like that... for *everything* you do... or see... for the rest of your life. ... *Every action is seen and felt as autonomic --it happens by itself. Got it? All your actions are seen and felt as autonomic. Whatever their motivations. That's the thot to take away from this.
. . Maybe this will help. In English. Here's the first word. JUST. Appropriately simple. Meaning "do no other". Not as in Luther's "Here I stand; I can do no other." That was a *choice dictated by his principles. I won't debate them here.
. . "Just", here, is almost "do *nothing". But as you've often heard, "you can't do just one thing." Everything you do inevitably influences many other things; just as so many things influenced your environment and resulted in you doing that thing! And many --you can argue that it's ALL the events were the result of accident. So... I'm advising you to try the impossible. It's ok... stop thinking! ...Stop thinking... Those aren't the two words. But they'd do very well.
. . This doesn't mean you gotta stop doing everything, even the things you want to do most. Do 'em! Just let yourself do whatever you want... with autonomy! Watch your body do it, as if from afar. Aaand --not a contradiction-- let yourself enjoy the hell out of it. Enlightenment can be fun! Who said you hafta sit Lotus and be silent?
. . Second word. "OBSERVE". You're putting the two together, but wait, first look at it alone. It's not so simple. Robert Heinlein wrote a classic book called "Stranger in a Strange Land". In it, a character named Jubal had Fair Witnesses at his house, "in robe". When in their robes, they went into a state of non-judgement about their surroundings. Their observations were pure; just what a legal system should want to testify in court. To demonstrate to a friend, Jubal called one robe-clad person over. He said to her, "You see the house on the hill over there? What color is it?" The Fair Witness replied, "It's white... on this side." She couldn't see the other side(s), of course, so she knew she could not describe it! For all she knew, the house had only the wall(s) that faced them.
. . OK, TOGETHER... "JUST OBSERVE". Do nothing but *receive* the passing existence. [I wish I could zap this quote into your permanent memory --I've said it before... a Ziggy cartoon: "The secret of living w/o tension & frustration is to avoid becoming *personally* involved in your own life."]
. . To observe a thing, you must have an idea of what it is, past what you can see on the surface of it. What shape were its ancestors? Ancestors are literally part of you. If you observe a living thing, what level of awareness is it likely to have in its mind? Can you imagine trotting on four legs? Buzzing thru the air? Their similarity to you can all be stated in a "percent of identical DNA" number. When I see a bird land nearby, I often think "Hello, brother." No, saying it aloud seems silly to me, but the thot is ok --it brings me closer to the larger identity.
. . Wait! No. To observe a thing, you must have no idea of what it is. The "knowledge" is a filter that obscures the pure reality of the thing. So do both!
. . Can you do it? ...no. Can I? ...no. Can a Zen master? Well, maybe. Is it even possible? Maybe not. So why do I even tell you, and why do I even practice it? Because it makes a huge difference in our perception, and it gets bigger easily. So I recommend practicing --believing that it's impossible.
. . I "practice" this a dozen times a day... meaning only that it comes to mind as something occurs near me. It changes me. I feel less identified with "my" identity, and how it is only nerve-sparks in the brain of a temporary assemblage of DNA. Of the 100 billion people who have lived, all built up memories of pleasures, memories of pains. And yet, all but 6.5 billion of those sets of memories have disintegrated with their containers. All those memories were very important to their people, and most of those memories were the end result of great efforts... but all are gone. You may splash your hand in water for all your strength, but when your hand is gone, it all slows and disappears. Does this impact how you feel about the *importance of your pains and pleasures?
. . What is *my life? It's that DNA plus the resultant actions that created memories. DNA demands only one thing: reproduce, and survive long enuf to do it --a lot. (Socio-biology) It's like a duty --as only those species that do it well manage to avoid extinction. You are driven with carrot and stick.
. . It all sounds so MR.Spock, doesn't it? Totally in the mind --and the chromosomes --so much so that all emotion is overwhelmed. But believe me, I often have my emotions take over. I'm not immune to the drive to survive, and the helplessness is maddening. (I can just blame the Lupron shots, of course.)
. . But --and this is important-- I don't criticize those embarrasing emotions... nor try to change them. We are body as well as mind, and the body sometimes insists that it has feelings to express. Tears flow, anger stews.... Yet --same time-- I have a quiet presence in the back of my mind that just respectfully observes the goings-on. It's an interesting drama, life. Doncha think?