"Deep in the Night" part 1

Finished Story 6 parts

This story takes place 11 years before TMP when Obi-Wan is 14 years old.

Summary: Qui-Gon is thought dead and Obi-Wan finds himself with a new Master. But just what exactly is his new Master trying to teach him? And what if the apprentice were to suddenly discover that everything he thought was true was a lie... and what if he discovered it too late?

I guess you could call this a song fic, although it did not start out that way. What happened was, I had the story, but was stuck for a title. Then I heard this song and I'm like: "Wow! That fits perfectly with the story!" So I used it as the title and included it.

Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, Yoda and anyone else recognizable belongs to George Lucas. Vu Kaa is mine, although I don't know if I want to claim him or not... I don't know who owns the song but it's not me. I'm not being paid for any of this (dream on).

Scrap and debris that had once been a ship called the Reliant floated past the window of the escape pod. Young Obi-Wan Kenobi stared out at it with a breaking heart. Somewhere, out there in that wreckage, was the body of the man he loved best in the universe.

"I'm Sorry Obi-Wan," Jedi Master Vu Kaa laid his hand on the boy's shoulder. Vu Kaa had deep black eyes and shoulder-length blond hair which he wore in a multitude of small braids. "But Qui-Gon is one with the Force now."

"No," Obi-Wan shook his head, his voice hoarse, his eyes barely concealing tears. "I would have known, I would have felt . . ."

"You were unconscious Obi-Wan, how could you have felt anything?" the other Jedi reasoned gently.

Obi-Wan did not answer; he did not know what to say. He had been Qui-Gon's apprentice for little more than a year, but the connection between them was already so deep that Obi-Wan felt as if not even unconsciousness should have been able to separate them like that.

"I understand your feelings," Vu Kaa comforted. "Two years ago I lost my Padawan in a similar incident. It was heart breaking, it was more than heart breaking, but language does not hold the words to express it properly."

Obi-Wan knew exactly what he meant.

"Grieving for him is natural," Vu Kaa assured, "But denying the truth is dangerous. He is gone, you must accept that and move on. The Council will appoint you a new Master to continue your training. You are still just a boy Obi-Wan, you will learn to forget."

"NO!" Obi-Wan thought vehemently. "As long as I live, I shall NEVER forget Master Qui-Gon!" But all he said was: "Yes, sir." He knew Vu Kaa was trying to help, but he also knew he was wrong. Normally he would have been ruffled at being called a boy, after all, he was 14! In his late 20's – early 30's, Vu Kaa was not that much older than he was. But right now, it hardly seemed to matter. More disturbing to him was the thought of being paired with a new Master. How could he imagine being taught by anyone other than Qui-Gon? Not too long ago he had been desperate to be accepted by any Master, but now, there was only one he desired, and that was one he could no longer have. He almost wished that Vu Kaa had not dragged him, unconscious, from the exploding ship. Almost wished he had left him to die with his Master.

"I would have saved you both if I could," the older Jedi said, as if sensing the apprentice's thoughts. "But he was already gone, and I could only carry one of you."

"Thank you," Obi-Wan said numbly, because he knew he should.

"Why don't you get some sleep? You look thoroughly exhausted. I'll contact the Council and let them know what has happened." Vu Kaa directed the boy to a small berth and made him lay down on it. He then crossed to the other side of the small pod, giving Obi-Wan at least the emotional, if not physical space and privacy he needed to bury his face in the pillow and soak it with his tears.

Obi-Wan knew it was childish, but he could not help himself. He had not realized how attached he had become to his Master, or how much he had come to depend on the sense of home he provided, the feeling of belonging. Now he felt so suddenly alone and adrift, just like the wreckage outside. He did not know what to do with the emotions inside him, so he took Vu Kaa's permission to grieve and cried out the silent pain that coursed through him so deep he could not put it to words, even in his mind.

Curled up in a small lump of misery, worn out and hurting from the battled he had just fought, Obi-Wan fell asleep to the hum of the pod's thrusters.

Once he was sure the boy was asleep, Vu Kaa switched on his comlink. When the familiar faces of the Jedi Council appeared before him, he bowed to their holographic visages, his multiple braids swishing. "I'm afraid I have terrible news . . ."

The Council looked grave, more grave than usual that is.

"Both you say? Lost together, they were?" Yoda's ears twitched, betraying great dismay behind his calm demeanor. "A great loss, if true this is. Much promise those two held."

Vu Kaa did not miss the way Yoda said: "If true this is," Yoda, at least, still did not completely trust him.

"You are sure of your information?" Mace Windu queried, also reluctant to believe that both Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan were dead.

"Unfortunately, yes," Vu Kaa nodded the affirmative. "I saw the ship blow, and I know they were both on board. Perhaps I should have done something, but I don't know what. None of us had any idea anything like that would happen. The pirates were all too close to want to destroy the ship; it must have been a self-destruct. I'm so sorry, there was just nothing I could do."

"Understand we do," Yoda nodded once.

"A team shall be dispatched, they should arrive within a few days. They will see what can be recovered and make a full report," Master Windu informed him.

Vu Kaa inclined his head. "I was on my way Daimaru when this occurred, will it be necessary for me to await the team's arrival, or should I continue?"

"Your presence is not required. We will contact you if there is need."

"As you say," he hesitated, "I did not know them long, but...they were good men."

"Indeed," Yoda nodded.

"May the Force be with you," Mace said, and the spectral images winked out.

Vu Kaa scowled and cut the transmission from his end as well. Still the same high-and-mighty dictators as ever. Still they watched him with wary eyes, disapproving of him. But he knew more than any of them, and he would pass his wisdom on, whether they allowed him to take a Padawan or not. After all, what gave them the right to play god over others anyway? He would show them what he could do, then they would understand.

Vu Kaa looked at Obi-Wan's sleeping form. The boy was strong and full of untapped talent; any idiot could see that. Fate or destiny had laid this opportunity before him, and he would make the most of it. The Jedi's black eyes seemed to regard the sleeping boy with an almost hungry look.

When Obi-Wan awoke, he found himself to be no longer on the pod, but on a ship. He sat upright immediately, unsure how in the world he had been moved without waking up.

"It's all right," Vu Kaa's calm voice made him jump. "This is my ship. You were sleeping so soundly, I hated to wake you. You've been through a lot."

"Are we heading back to Coruscant?" Obi-Wan asked, rubbing his aching eyes. He should not have cried so much, now his eyes were dry and itchy. New tears still pressed at him, stinging the backs of his eyes at the slightest provocation, but he did not allow them to come, not again. Qui-Gon would want him to be strong. Qui-Gon... Just thinking his name was a mistake at this point and his resolve nearly cracked. Then his stubbornness kicked in. He would not let Vu Kaa see him cry again, he would be strong!

"No," Vu Kaa shook his head. "You are to accompany me to Syridan."

Obi-Wan looked both shocked and stricken. "But – but," he protested. "What about the Council? Shouldn't I go before them to report what happened? And besides," his voice dropped, "I must attend the Funeral."

Vu Kaa sat down on the bed beside Obi-Wan. "I have already spoken to the Council and told them what happened, they see no point in subjecting you to the pain of going over it all again," Vu Kaa paused, as if unwilling to bring up the other subject. "There cannot be a funeral without a body, you know that. I could find no trace of him with my scanners, but," he added hopefully, "The Council is sending a team to scout the area. If they discover anything or if some other kind of arrangement is made, they will contact us and I promise we shall return to Coruscant immediately."

Obi-Wan was still puzzled, and discontent. "But why not now?" He felt lost and alone and wished to be back where things were familiar to him, to talk to Yoda about his feelings and lose himself, and maybe his pain, in the quiet serenity of the Temple gardens.

"Obi-Wan," Vu Kaa said gently, "This is difficult I know, and I feel the timing is bad, but we must accept the Council's wisdom."

"What do you mean?" Obi-Wan was confused and hurting and wished that the older Jedi would stop beating around the bush.

"I mean that they have decided that I shall be your new teacher."

Obi-Wan was shocked that this could have happened so soon, and that they had not even seen him first, or told him in person. He almost could not believe it, but he had no reason to doubt Vu Kaa, no motive to think he was lying.

"Yes, I know it's sudden, believe me, I'm surprised too!" Vu Kaa sighed. "The truth is," he seemed embarrassed to admit it, "That I asked for you, but I never expected them to say yes on the spot. They seem to think that your training must not suffer setback because of this and that a mission would help to take your mind off your grief. As I said, I know the timing is bad. I myself would have thought it better that you return to Coruscant and have some time to yourself, but then, perhaps they are wiser after all. Perhaps they know that Coruscant would bring back too any memories right now, and we must not live in the past. Perhaps they know too, that since my last Padawan died I have had no wish to take another apprentice, until now, and perhaps they feel that we may help each other heal. I truly hope we shall."

Obi-Wan was still unhappy, but he would not be so cruel as to reject Vu Kaa's kind words. Besides, if it was what the Council had decided, then he would just have to trust that their wisdom was above his own right now. He knew that what one wants is not necessarily always what is best for one.

He hadn't seen the wisdom in it when they sent him to Bandomeer, perhaps they themselves could not have foreseen the way that would change his life, but it had. It had brought he and Qui-Gon together and healed the void that Xanatos had created in Qui-Gon's heart. "Always in motion is the future," Yoda liked to say, and Obi-Wan knew he was right, but that didn't mean it was always easy to accept.

"Very well then... Master," it was most difficult for him to use that word right now. His throat seemed to constrict around it, threatening to choke him on the raw lump it created. "If you and the Council deem it best, I shall accompany you to Syridan."

"That's a good Padawan," Vu Kaa patted his shoulder. "I know you will do your best."

"Yes," Obi-Wan nodded blankly. "Master," he added when he felt Vu Kaa's eyes on him.

Vu Kaa gave his shoulder another squeeze. "I think we'll do very well together Obi-Wan Kenobi, very well."