Melting Ice
By: Kristen
It was snowing--hard. Qui-Gon looked worriedly outside. Obi-Wan had been gone far too long. He sensed that what had started out as a routine food-gathering mission was rapidly becoming dangerous for the boy. Qui-Gon cast a quick glance around the sparse room, hoping to calm his nerves, but failed miserably.
Obi-Wan had been with him for two years. He was a strapping boy of fifteen now with hair the color of Corellian soil and eyes a peculiar shade of green. They reminded Qui-Gon of the storm-tossed oceans of Bandomeer--where he had asked Obi-Wan to become his Padawan.
He brushed the memory aside. Xanatos was still fresh in his mind and he didn't want to concentrate on that at the moment. It had been a painful experience for both him and the boy, but it had served to bring the both of them together. That was something at least.
Qui-Gon turned back to the window. Was it his imagination or did the snow seem to be falling harder? And by the Force, where was Obi-Wan?
Obi-Wan was freezing. The air was freezing. Hell, the whole damn PLANET was freezing! If he didn't know better, he'd think that he and Qui-Gon were on the ice world of Hoth. He shook his head at the thought as he trudged along through the snow, his Padawan braid swinging with his exertion. He was exhausted.
Coughing, he slung the native animal he'd caught for supper over his shoulder. It looked like a rabbit, but it had shorter ears and a blue coat. Obi-Wan personally thought it was very ugly. He was irked by the order of trying to catch the thing. It bit! He had bite marks up and down his left arm from the animal's sharp incisors. It had been a struggle, but he had finally subdued the creature with a blow to the head from his lightsaber, which had painlessly killed it.
Now, he was less than two kilometers from the small cabin he was sharing with Qui-Gon. The Jedi Council had sent them there for a period of four weeks so Obi-Wan could learn to rely on outside world for his care, rather than other people. It also served to help Qui-Gon do the same; he was a bit rusty in the out-of-doors area of survival. They'd been there for three weeks.
The planet was called Freia. It was a frozen wasteland almost all year, except for a period of two weeks when the sun broke through the heavy cloud cover to melt the brutal ice. Obi-Wan fervently wished he was here during that time.
Instead of dwelling on his misfortune, he focused on keeping himself as warm as possible, pulling the Force around him like a shield and wrapping his parka made of Taun-Taun fleece tighter around him. He this tried to shield himself from the snarling wind. It wasn't working.
Obi-Wan, blinking furiously, realized that his vision was blurring. The trees swam in front of him and he had the sneaking suspicion that he'd wandered off the trail. He was feeling overly warm too. That disturbed him to no end. Perhaps he should stop, wait for Qui-Gon.
He dropped the ice rabbit in the snow under a huge tree whose limbs struggled to touch the sky. Obi-Wan sank wearily to his knees, wondering if the tree wanted to leave the planet as much as he did. Maybe he could rest just a little, put his head down and go to sleep. Some small part of his brain screamed at him to get up, to keep moving. But his limbs wouldn't obey. He crashed then limply into the snow drifts beneath the colossus. Closing his eyes, he saw the world fade from a blinding white to a black darker than the deepest vacuum of space. "Qui-Gon," he whispered, then passed out.
Qui-Gon Jinn bolted upright from the chair he'd settled himself into. The call echoed through his mind, causing him to break into a cold sweat. Jumping up from the comfortable armchair, he hurried to the closet near the door. Flinging it open, he hurriedly dragged his coat out and shrugged into it. Then, shouldering the massive door open against the snow, he charged outside.
"Obi-Wan!" he yelled, calling on all his powers in the Force to find his Padawan's life energy. He felt nothing. Blocking the rising tide of fear, he moved onward, checking for any signs in the fast-piling snow that his young apprentice had strayed from the path.
"Obi-Wan!" The cat of a wind screamed and snatched his words away. An icy gust flung from her paw whipped his hair around his eyes and he turned, fighting his graying hair. He stopped, his mouth dropping open. There, half-covered by the fine white powder, lay his Padawan.
"Obi!" he cried, floudering throught the snow, struggling to reach the fallen one. It seemed forever before he sank to his knees in the snow, but it took only moments. He scanned the boy's body quickly, looking for injuries, but could find none, save the frostbite and bite marks on his arm.
"Come on, let's go," he grunted as he swung the too-still body into his arms. Cradling Obi-Wan's head against his chest, the Master stood, bending a little under the weight. Slowly, he staggered the kilometer back to the cabin. The snow continued to fall.
Back inside, the Jedi kicked the solid door shut with his leg, trying not to disturb the child he held in his arms. Though the rest of him was cold, Qui-Gon could feel the heat coming off the boy's face in waves. Quickly, Qui-Gon carried Obi-Wan to his bed in the next room.
"We must get you warmed up, my young Padawan, and try to draw that fever down." Qui-Gon was amazed at how calm his voice sounded, but he didn't dwell on it. Instead, he undressed his charge, peeling the frozen clothes from Obi-Wan's frost bitten body. The boy made no sound. Qui-Gon wrapping Obi-Wan in his apprentice robe, quite a bit shorter than Qui-Gon's own. Though Obi-Wan was tall for his age, Qui-Gon towered over him by almost half a meter.
Once Obi-Wan was dressed in warm coverings, Qui-Gon pulled the covers up to his chin. He noted very little change in the Padawan's coloring--he was pale with red splotches on both cheeks where the fever had set in. Qui-Gon knew how painful it would be also if Obi-Wan awoke before he could begin a healing.
Right now, however, Qui-Gon was concerned with lowering Obi-Wan's temperature. He hurried around to the end of the bed and threw the covers away from the boy's feet. "We must bring the blood down from your head." He spoke conversationally, hoping it would help him to calm down and concentrate. He placed both hands on one of Obi-Wan's long feet.
They were ice-cold. Qui-Gon winced a little, but began to carefully rub his feet, tenderly at first, until both were thawed and the red splotches on Obi-Wan's cheeks had faded to a dull flush. Obi-Wan had never moved.
Qui-Gon sighed. Now, he must take care of himself. He could not force a healing trance until he was strong enough. He walked stiffly to a long chest that separated both beds in the small room. Opening it, he found several faded, thin, gray blankets. They would have to do.
He picked them up and turned back to Obi-Wan. As gently as he could, he tucked all the blankets around the boy and made sure that his feet were covered. He stepped back, his soft blue eyes looking down at Obi-Wan's face worriedly. He placed a hand tenderly on his Padawan's brow. "Rest well, my apprentice."
Turning, he spotted a high-backed chair near his bed against the wall. He lifted it and set it down next to Obi-Wan's bed. He would stay all night. "Just in case you need me," he whispered to the unconscious young man. Qui-Gon settled his robes about him and closed his eyes. He was asleep immediately.
Qui-Gon opened his eyes suddenly, his sleep disrupted by a faint sound to his right. He turned his head slightly and saw that Obi-Wan had moved a little. His green eyes were half open and staring at Qui-Gon. The teacher very nearly smiled in relief, but the slight exhilaration was short-lived.
Obi-Wan's eyes were glazed and a damp sheen of sweat covered his face. "So the fever hasn't broken," Qui-Gon murmured. Obi-Wan's eyes drifted closed as sleep claimed his body.
"Rest," Qui-Gon said softly as Obi-Wan moved restlessly. He placed a hand on his forehead again. Still hot. He moved to place more logs on the blazing fire. Then, Qui-Gon settled back down.
He could not perform a healing trance. That was only for physical injury and while he'd already repaired the damage to Obi-Wan's arm, he could do nothing else. Except wait.
Qui-Gon relaxed back in the chair and sighed. There was still a long time before dawn. The planet's cycle was very odd. Instead of an overly long period of daylight, such as it was, there was a tremendously long night. Only eight hours of the day was devoted to light and day. He and Obi-Wan had spent much of their stay in darkness.
"At least there are interesting sunrises," Qui-Gon muttered aloud. Being as their was no sun, the light that managed to break through the thick haze was a welcome relief. Obi-Wan always welcomed it with a huge smile. In fact, the first day they were there, the sun had risen and he had pleaded with Qui-Gon to play in the snow. Qui-Gon laughed at the memory.
"Please, Qui-Gon, I mean Master, please?!" The youthful face peered up at him anxiously.
Qui-Gon tried his best to look stern and failed miserably. With a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth, he met Obi-Wan's eyes and asked plainly, "Why?"
Obi-Wan stopped as though startled. "Why, Master, I've only seen snow once. On Corellia, it snowed when all the students from the Temple had gone for a field trip. The others jumped right in the white stuff and started playing. Leat told me to come and play. We spent the whole afternoon sleeding down a big hill and having snowball fights. I've never had so much fun." Obi-Wan had barely stopped for a breath the whole while. Qui-Gon smiled a little more.
"How old were you?" he inquired, raising his eyebrow at his Padawan.
Obi-Wan had flushed scarlet. "Eight," he muttered, lowering his eyes to the hardwood floor of the cabin.
Qui-Gon's smile turned to a frown. He'd unkowingly hurt the boy, making him feel childish and immature. "Well," he began slowly, "I see no reason why not. In fact," he added, drawing their coats from the closet, "I'll go with you. I haven't played in snow since I was your age, and besides, what fun is it if you're all alone?"
The smile that broke through the frown on Obi-Wan's face was immediate. Qui-Gon thought if he grinned any harder, he'd split his face in two.
"Oh, thank you, Master!" he cried, throwing himself into Qui-Gon's arms and giving him a tremendous hug.
Qui-Gon was startled. Rarely had Obi-Wan shown such affection, even to his close friends at the Academy. That he felt close enough to his Master to hug him was nothing short of amazing. Qui-Gon placed a hand gently on Obi-Wan's shoulder.
"Come now," he said, drawing his composure around him, "Let's go outside."
They spent the entire day sledding, throwing snowballs, and making angels in the snow. Qui-Gon could not remember a time where he'd felt so much at ease.
Later that night, Qui-Gon was drifting off to sleep, thoroughly exhausted, when he heard his Padawan whisper, "Thank you." Qui-Gon fell asleep with a smile on his face.
It was morning. Truly morning. There was a bitter gray dawn that peaked through the perpetual cloud cover to touch the landscape with light. Qui-Gon started out the window, wondering idely if the sun would show her misty rays today.
He'd stayed awake the whole of the night, meditating and sending comforting waves of the Force to the initiate's frozen body. Qui-Gon couldn't tell if it was helping, but he would try anyway.
No, he would *do*. Yoda's teachings sprag to mind unbidden. He would pray over this boy, this Padawan who had already made such a large impact on his life.
He heard a soft moan coming from Obi-Wan. Quickly, Qui-Gon leaned over the boy anxiously, willing him to open his eyes. Obi-Wan did.
"Master," he croaked weakly as he tried to move.
"No, no, don't speak, don't move. I'll get you some water." Qui-Gon made his way confidently into the kitchen, searching for a pitcher and a cup to pour water in.
Quickly, he found them and took them back to Obi-Wan filled with the sweet, life-giving liquid. The boy was still awake, but just barely.
"Here, drink this," Qui-Gon ordered. He tilted the boy's head up and watched him swallow a few sips. Obi-Wan nodded that he'd had enough, so Qui-Gon gently lowered his head to the pillow and set the glass down.
"Your fever has broken," he announced. Obi-Wan looked at him, confusion written on his face.
"Fever? What do you mean?"
"You were trapsing about in the snow and got too cold, I would imagine. When I found you, you were unconscious and freezing. The animal bites and frostbite wounds have been healed. You'll be fine." Qui-Gon leaned back in the chair that he'd sat down in.
"But what about the rabbit I had?" Obi-Wan asked.
Qui-Gon shook his head. "I had to leave it to bring you back here. By the time you were settled, it was snowing too hard to go back outside."
Obi-Wan sighed in frustration even as his eyeslids fell. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be. The important thing is that you're safe. Don't worry about it." Qui-Gon paused. "Now go to sleep! The transport to take us back to Coruscant will be here in three days. You want to be able to walk into it, don't you?"
Obi-Wan glanced at him suspiciously. "What do you mean if I can't walk?"
Qui-Gon grinned ferouciously. "Why, I'll have to carry you."
The look of horror on Obi-Wan's face was worth the joke. "I'll die. Of course, I'll got to sleep. Good night!" He shut his eyes and was asleep almost instantly.
Qui-Gon chuckled. "Good morning," he replied and stood up. He had to find breakfast. He was starving. And his Padawan needed food also. Perhaps the rabbit was still laying where he'd found Obi-Wan.
He glanced back at the sleeping boy. With luck, Obi-Wan wouldn't awaken for several hours, perhaps the whole day. That would give him plenty of time. Quickly grabbing his coat, he shoved the door open and headed out into the dull glare of ice.
Obi-Wan awoke to the smell of roasting meat. His mouth started watering and he realized suddenly how hungry he was. And, ne noted uncomfortably, that he really had to go to the bathroom.
He struggled to sit up when Qui-Gon Jinn appeared at the door of the small room. "I sensed you were awake," his teacher said. "Would I be correct in assuming you need to get up?"
"*Very* correct," Obi-Wan muttered.
"Let me help you up then," Qui-Gon said, hurrying in and grasping the boy's elbows.
"I can do this by myself," Obi-Wan snapped, turning red.
Qui-Gon was amused. "I know. But I doubt that you can walk without my help to the bathroom. Come one."
Obi-Wan grunted as he struggled to his feet, the fevered muscles too weak to hold his weight steady. Together, he and his Master walked slowly around the room.
When he had finished in the bathroom, he opened the door to find Qui-Gon still waiting in his chair. "I don't want to go back to bed," Obi-Wan whined. "Put me in a chair or something. At least so I can eat."
Qui-Gon lifted an eyebrow as he stood, walking over and taking Obi-Wan's elbow. "After you eat, though, you go straight back. No arguments." He held up his hand as Obi-Wan started to protest. "You need your rest. Or," he added thoughtfully, "I may insist on carrying you to the transport anyway."
Obi-Wan glowered at him but remained silent. Qui-Gon settled him in the recently vacated chair, draping a blanket over the boy's knees. "What time is it?" Obi-Wan asked.
Qui-Gon looked up from the blanket. "Around suppertime, I should think."
Obi-Wan started. "You mean I've slept the whole day away and you're ordering me back to bed to rest?"
Qui-Gon straightened. "Did you argue when I told you to?" he countered evenly, smiling in spite of Obi-Wan's predicament.
Obi-Wan was quiet. "I suppose not." Then he brightened. "What's to eat? I'm starved."
Qui-Gon grinned. "Well, I happened along a rabbit someone had recently killed while out this morning. He was lying at the base of a rather large tree. Had a fine blue coat, I might add."
Obi-Wan smiled back. "How did you find it?"
"It wasn't very hard. We have food, though, thanks to you."
Obi-Wan sighed. "Then could you please go get me some? I haven't eaten all day."
"Neither have I, but you don't hear *me* complaining," Qui-Gon responded good- naturedly.
"Yes, but you're not the sick one who needs it," Obi-Wan replied.
"Oh, ho, ho, so you're admitting you're sick!" Qui-Gon laughed with glee. "Well, that means complete rest until we leave."
Obi-Wan didn't say a word. Qui-Gon kept right on laughing.
Obi-Wan continued to recover speedily, his aching muscles finally supporting his now meager weight. The fever had left him with little appetite and not even Qui-Gon's pleading and threats could coax more than a few bites into his weary body. But he tried.
Now the transport had arrived. When Qui-Gon arrived to gather their belongings after speaking with the captain, Obi=Wan glared at him.
"I'm walking," the boy insisted.
Qui-Gon nodded. "We need to hurry. The captain says that the ice storms are building up. We can't stay here any longer than necessary."
Obi-Wan felt a slight chill grip him as he imaged venturing outside again. "How bad is it?"
The Jedi Master could sense that his pupil was upset. He wanted to reassure him very badly. That was another shock for Qui-Gon. He never imagined feeling this close to Obi-Wan. "It's not bad now," he said. "But it will be if we don't hurry. Come on."
Obi-Wan reached out to grab his hand. "Help me," he said.
Qui-Gon knew he didn't mean wakling. No, he meant facing the ice again, going outside where he was almost killed. Qui-Gon could feel Obi-Wan's fear growing.
He placed his own hand on the boy's. "I will."
It was a struggle to make it to the shuttle that would take the away. The kitten had grown suddenly into a tigress, snarling, her winds ripping at their robes. Obi-Wan clutched at the sleeve of his Master's cloak, slipping and hoping for a purchase in the drifts.
Qui-Gon in turn led the way. He kept his right hand on his apprentice's back, pulling him close when he slipped and shielding him from the furious gusts of wind that impeded their progress.
Finally, though, they saw it. It was sleek, white, and powerfully built. Both of the Jedi hoped privately that it would be enough to break the heavy atmosphere. Neither wanted to be on the planet any longer than necessary.
The captain was there, dressed in a blue Republic parka. When he spotted the two, he immediately ran over.
"Hello!" He yelled through the howling wind. "You need to get onboard. We can't wait any longer!"
Qui-Gon nodded, hurrying to the ramp which led into the belly of the ship, practically dragging Obi-Wan with him. The boy was shivering badly, very pale, and was having trouble just putting one foot in front of the other. Qui-Gon shoved him inside.
The captain followed closely, sealing the hatch as soon as they were in. "If you'll take a seat, we can go." He all but ran to the cockpit to power the ship to full.
Qui-Gon still supported Obi-Wan who leaned against him, his strength taken by the journey to the ship. "Come on, let's get settled."
He dragged the boy to a seat and belted him in. Obi-Wan's eyes were dropping, but he was awake enough to turn his sharp green gaze on Qui-Gon. "See? You didn't have to carry me after all." Then his eyes closed and he fell into a quick slumber.
Qui-Gon smiled slightly. "All right, captain!" As soon as he'd strapped himself in, the ship began to shake and suddenly, they were airborn.
Qui-Gon was grateful that Obi-Wan was unconscious. The craft shook violently as it proceeded through the hail and ice storms, frightening the tough Master. He was afraid of dying, but the boy...
He chided himself for getting so close to a boy he'd only known two years. He'd been close to Xanatos, but look what happened! But this boy, this Padawan, had grown on him. "He's my son," he whispered, as if seeing a revelation.
Yes, Obi-Wan was his son. If not in blood, then in spirit. And to finally realize that he loved the young man that much was wonderful. He felt as though a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. This! This was what he'd been seeking after Xanatos. Someone to love as his own. But now, with this ship in danger of crashing straight back down to Freia, he turned all his energy to the Force, willing the storms to abate so they might clear the planet.
Almost imperceptibly, the wind began to die down, slowing until the captain shouted with malicious glee, "HA! Dammit, but we made it!"
Qui-Gon sat back limply in his seat. "Thank you, Captain! An excellent piloting job!"
The Captain laughed. "Not hardly, Jedi. But I thank you anyway. In more ways than one!"
So he knew. Qui-Gon didn't dwell on it. For now, he settled back down in sleep.
When Obi-Wan awoke, he was lying on a cot in a ship's quarters. "We made it," he thought. Relief filled him. Qui-Gon had saved his life yet again. Obi-Wan couldn't count how many times it had happened that way.
Before he could even try, the door burst open, and Qui-Gon Jinn strode purposefully in. "Good, you're awake. I have something I need to say to you."
Obi-Wan blushed. "This is it," he thought. "He's gonna rail me for my survival skills."
Qui-Gon looked up sharply, surprise evident on his face. "No, Obi-Wan, this is not punishment. In fact, I have something to say which will shock you if anything."
Obi-Wan sat forward, interested. Was Qui-Gon going to apologize for something he'd done in the past? Obi-Wan had no idea. So he simply waited.
Qui-Gon sat in a desk chair facing Obi-Wan's small bed. He began uncomfortably. "When I saw you lying in the snow, I could not feel your presence and I thought that you were dead." He stopped.
Obi-Wan sensed his discomfort. "Go on, Master," he said softly, paying attention.
Qui-Gon looked to the ground, then up again to meet Obi-Wan's eyes. "I felt like a father who has lost a child. For an instant, there was a grief so intense I thought I would die." He paused.
Obi-Wan stared. He didn't dare hope to hear what he wanted to.
Qui-Gon shifted in his seat. "What I mean to say, Obi-Wan, is that I have come to think of you as my son. I love you as a father loves his son and I never want to lose you."
Obi-Wan's face was devoid of emotion. It was too much to take in at once.
Qui-Gon suddenly felt uncertain. Perhaps he shouldn't have told the boy. Obi-Wan was struggling for his independence, as all teens do. Maybe he didn't need to hear it. Maybe he wasn't ready to hear it. Maybe...
"And I you, Master," Obi-Wan said, interrupting Qui-Gon's thoughts. Though his face showed nothing, his voice ached with emotion.
Qui-Gon stood and walked to his Padawan. Obi-Wan drew him into a hug, burrying his face in his Master's shoulder.
Qui-Gon whispered in the boy's ear. "Then I will call you 'Ben', for in our language it means 'son of my hand'."
Obi-Wan did not answer. He could not answer. His silent tears fell, drenching his Master's thick brown cloak.
But to Qui-Gon, it was answer enough.