Through a Child's Eyes
By Chaos
Rating:G
Disclaimer: Obi-wan and Anakin and the galaxy they reside in are the
exclusive property of George Lucas. I am respectfully borrowing them with no intention to
profit thereby.
Note: '** **' denotes Anakin's thoughts. '- -' denotes emphasis.
"Samla? Samla, come away from there!" The little girl reluctantly pulled her grey-green eyes from the men seated in the main cabin of her father's freighter and moved down the short hallway to haul herself up into the right hand seat behind the Twi'lek firstmate. "It's not polite to stare."
"Yes, Captain," she piped in her little voice. Samla was very small for her age and dreamed constantly that one day she would be big like her father. She also wished that she had her father's knack for fixing things, since she always seemed to be breaking them, but even at the tender age of six, her family knew what she would do when she grew up. Samla would be a pilot in the Tragoni shipping firm. A pilot or a gunner. She had the reactions, and more importantly, the instincts for it.
Nidaine Tragoni turned in his chair and regarded his tiny daughter. Her grey-green eyes were a strange mix of his wife's clear green and his own blue-grey eyes. Her hair color, had he not known intimately what it was, would have been impossible to ascertain since she insisted it be kept ridiculously short for a girl and then pulled a watchman's cap down over her ears, hiding what little there was to see of it. She gazed right back at him with a confidence and honesty that often surprised him. Already he could tell that she would be very different from any of his other children. "If you are curious about our passengers, then ask them, don't just stare and wonder." He reached out and gave her pert nose a loving tweak. "If you don't ask, how will you learn?"
"By watching, Captain." She never called him father on board ship, but she'd always been a precocious sort of child. He smiled. "Then tell me what you have learned."
"They know each other very well."
"And how do you know that?"
"They don't talk much, but they are very relaxed around each other. If they didn't know each other very well they would talk more or be less comfortable around each other. But they watch everything we do and glance at one another as if sharing a private joke. Who are they, Captain?"
Her matter of fact attitude as well as her calm, accurate assessment took him aback. Maybe he should bring her along more often. Samla's mother had her too much to herself as it was. "They are jedi, Samla. And you will learn that jedi seldom talk to those who are not jedi." He turned back to the task at hand, plotting the next hyperspace jump. "You may go keep them company if you wish."
"Thank you, Captain." He smiled at the joyful tone in her sweet voice as she slithered down off the seat and practically skipped back into the main cabin.
Samla felt absolutely no self-consciousness as she hurried into the main cabin and climbed into a seat facing the two hooded figures that sat there. They looked at her and she looked back. She ignored her father's warning about staring since she felt quite certain that if these men found her at all disturbing, they would not hesitate to politely tell her so. When she felt she had picked up everything that she could from simply looking she glanced from one to the other and carefully thought about what questions would likely get her the most informative answers.
"Are you jedi?"
Behind their hoods the two men glanced at each other in an amused manner. Together they reached up and pushed back the hoods of their brown robes, both had nice white smiles. "We are, little one." It was the older of the two who replied and Samla could see that the other was really more of a young man, like her brother, maybe sixteen or seventeen years old. Now that there was something else to see, she spent more time scrutinizing the Galactic Strider's passengers.
"What are jedi?"
"You don't know what jedi are?" the younger man seemed quite astonished.
"If I knew I would not ask," Samla informed him tartly. "I am not in the habit of asking for things I already have."
The older man, his short trimmed beard twitching with a half hidden smile, rested his hands on the table between them. "Jedi are people who use the Force. We often help settle disputes and arguments and travel the galaxy looking for other people who can feel the Force so that we can teach them to use it too."
Samla nodded once and sat back a bit to think this over. "So," she began slowly, "What if the people you find don't want to learn?"
"Not want to learn?" The young one burst out. "How could anyone not want to learn to use the Force? Do you know what the Force is?"
"Focus, Anakin. Be calm. She has probably lived her entire life on this ship or another like it. Do not be surprised at what she does, or does not know." He smiled a bit wider as he looked back at the insightful little child across from him. "We have not met anyone who did not, child, so we do not know what would happen."
"My name is Samla Tragoni. You can call me Sammy."
"And I am Obi-wan Kenobi. This is my apprentice, Anakin Skywalker."
She smiled at them both. She'd learned from watching her parents that you smiled when you met someone, no matter what you thought about them. "The Force, Samla, is all around us. It is a source of energy that binds us all together. Some people, like Anakin and myself, can feel the Force and use it to help us help others."
"So, do I have the Force?" This time, both men seemed a little taken aback.
"I can check if you like, Sammy." Obi-wan answered her. "Though I doubt that you do."
Samla nodded enthusiastically and then waited to see what he would do to check her. He closed his eyes and that was it. It struck Samla as a strange way to check anything, but if he said he was checking then she would believe him till she had proof otherwise. She had heard that jedi were honest from both her mother and her uncle Sebbist. After a moment he opened his bright blue eyes and shook his head at her. "It is as I suspected. You do not."
The little girl shrugged. It was like some one telling her that she had no bantha fodder. It might mean more to her if she knew what bantha fodder [i]was[/i]. She filed that fact away with many others that might be useful or meaningful later when she understood more.
"What are you going to do when you get to Dantooine? Who are you going to help?"
Anakin narrowed his eyes at her. "How did you know where we are going?"
"Remember what I said earlier, Anakin."
"Yes, Master." Samla watched with curiosity the interaction between these two. They acted much like father and son, but also like teacher and pupil.
"She probably knew where we were going before we ever arrived on this vessel." His eyes asked his question for him and Samla answered readily enough. "Oh, I helped plot the course for our journey and watched the Captain compute the first hyperspace jump. I don't have enough math for it yet." Her tone was, as ever, matter of fact. It was only a matter of more time and then she would be doing that, too. She knew it and was not disturbed by it, willing to simply let it happen.
"We are going to meet an old friend there. It is just a visit sort of journey, but if someone there needs help, we will help them." Sensing that this in depth grilling would go on if not diverted, the jedi master asked a question of his own. "Tell me, Sammy. Do you play Sabaac?"
Her answer was a derisive snort. "Can you afford to pay me when you lose?"
*******
After the evening meal, Obi-wan and Anakin retired to their cabin at the rear of the freighter. Both of their purses were lighter and Captain Tragoni was still chuckling to himself about how his six-year-old daughter had cleaned out two jedi at Sabaac.
"She is a strange child, Master."
"She knows who she is and what she is and is content with both, my padawan." Obi-wan turned to look at his student. "Did you observe her reactions to us? How carefully she asked her questions? How closely she watched us? Her reaction to not feeling the Force?"
"Yes, Master. She paid close attention to everything we said, but did not seem to care that she did not feel the Force." Anakin looked perplexed. "I do not understand. Why would she not want to feel the Force?" He had learned the hard way that it was always easier to admit to Obi-wan that he did not understand than it was to fake it when his master asked him to act upon that understanding.
"She already knows that there are things she can not change. She is small, we are not. There is nothing that she can do to change that. It is not that she does not want to be taller, in fact I have twice heard her mutter to herself about it, but she does not let worry over being small for her age consume her. She is insensitive to the Force, we are not. Again there is nothing she can do to change that, so she does not worry about it."
Obi-wan Kenobi looked deeply into his padawan's eyes. "Do not expend energy worrying about things you can not change, Anakin. It is energy that is better expended some other way and it will only lead to frustration or anger." Anakin knew well the reasons to avoid anger. Master Yoda preached about the necessity of avoiding anger and fear constantly. It was one of the small jedi's favorite subjects, or so it seemed. "I think you could learn a lot from that child, Anakin. I want you to spend time with her during the voyage to Dantooine."
"Yes, Master." Obi-wan knelt before his bunk, settling himself for meditation and his apprentice did likewise. Anakin deliberately lead his thoughts back to Samla Tragoni, though, in truth, it required little effort. She was the type to stick in the mind.
Her innocent question about not wanting to learn nagged at him. Had he really wanted to learn to use the Force when Qui-gon and Obi-wan first came to Tatooine? Or had he simply wanted something other than a slave's existence? What if he now changed his mind and decided that he no longer wanted to learn? Could he change his mind now? Did he want to? He knew that all other jedi were found within the first year of their lives and taken in for training. **It would have been so much easier if I had been so young.** But he had been nine, he knew what was out there other than the regimented life that the jedi lived. Anakin Skywalker knew what more and what less could be had. Would he choose any other way, given the chance? Would any of the others have chosen not to study if they had known what he had?
Worry. Obi-wan had said not to worry about what could not be changed. He had made a decision. It was done with and the past could not be changed. Had Obi-wan known that he harbored these thoughts, that he did indeed worry every once in a while? Kenobi was his master. It was his job to teach what his padawan needed to learn, even if Anakin did not know that he needed to learn it.
**It is done and I can not change it. She is gone, but she lives in my memory still and I would not change that.** A new peace settled over Anakin when he said that to himself and he thanked Qui-gon again for preparing such a good teacher for him. As always, the thought of the dead jedi master brought a tear to Anakin's eyes. A tear of gratitude and a tear of sadness. Soon after, he finished his meditations and lay down to sleep.
*******
Over the next week, Anakin spent much time with young Samla, though he did not ever play Sabaac with her again. She knew as much about ships and cargos and flying as someone three or even four times her age, but she knew little of the world outside the ships and stations she had grown up on. He found her perspective in life unique.
When he asked her something she did not know she would shrug. "If I need to know it, the Captain will tell me." Such complete trust and innocence was refreshing, but he began to worry for her. There was so much that she did not know that she would need to learn in order to survive, yet she worried not a whit. The young girl was happy to share any knowledge she had with him whenever he asked and was surprised that he thought she should not.
"Why do you tell me everything you know about the ship? What if I were trying to sabotage it?" he asked once over the noon meal.
"Why would you do that? You are a jedi and you help people."
"Let us pretend that I am not a jedi, that I am just an ordinary passenger. Would you still tell me all about the ship?"
"Sure." She shrugged. "Even if I didn't tell you, you could look it up just as easy, or ask someone on the docks and they'd likely tell you, though it would probably cost you more credits. If you can just as easy get the information from somewhere else, why shouldn't I tell you? Saves you time and I get to practice remembering. Besides, why would you want to sabotage the ship you were in?" Her lips curled into a wry smile and she shook her little head at him. "That's not a very smart thing to do." She glanced up at him slyly with those soft grey-green eyes of her's. "Are you [i]sure[/i] you don't want to play Sabaac again?"
*******
"Master, she is a strange mix of innocence and sophistication. She understands that the dock workers and other people sell information. She knows that there are people out there who like to hurt others and yet she trusts her father, the mate, and us implicitly. How can that be?" Teacher and pupil were seated in their cabin awaiting the end of the hyperspace transit.
"She has little experience with such hostile intent, Anakin. No one she knows has ever betrayed her, so why should she expect it from anyone?" Obi-wan's tone was even and calm as always. "She has probably never lost anyone close to her, so she does not expect it to ever happen."
Anakin jolted. -He- had expected to lose his mother from before he had even left her behind on Tatooine. That had not lessened the pain when he found that he had indeed lost her for good. In point of fact, he had been quite miserable with worry for her. Why should this small child be so serene when her whole world might crumble down about her ears?
She did not worry. Obi-wan's words rang in his mind. Samla lived and enjoyed what she had, while she had it and did not waste energy worrying about what to do if it went away. She would deal with that when it came. Anakin was not dealing with his mother's death, he was brooding about it. That was not constructive. Obi-wan was right yet again. There was much this simple little girl was teaching him about life.
*******
"Captain, may I ask the jedi if I may go with them to visit their friend?" Nidaine turned from where the company droids were unloading the cargo from the freighter. Samla usually helped her mother oversee unloading and invoicing so there was no need to keep the girl here to learn what she already knew. Captain Tragoni scratched at his auburn hair. "I don't know. There -is- still cargo to unload and invoicing to do and payment to be collected." he said in a teasingly reluctant tone.
"Please, Captain?" Those soft grey-green eyes spoke volumes.
"Well," he knew he would cave in eventually. He always did, but he wanted to rationalize it to himself first. The jedi could always say no, which would end it there. Samla was a very good girl in that respect. If they said yes, he knew that they would take good care of his daughter and besides, it would do her good to get out into the real world without a parent or older sibling riding herd on her. "Alright, but be sure to mind what they say."
"Thank you, daddy!" He smiled in fatherly pride as she scooted back aboard and came zipping back out again with her poncho and credit pouch. His only daughter had been so eager that she'd forgotten her own rule and called him daddy while they were still on a shipping run.
"Excuse me, Sir." Obi-wan looked down to where the young Tragoni girl had tugged once on his robe to get his attention. "If it's not too much bother, would, I mean, may I accompany you to visit your friend?" His hooded head twisted to meet Anakin's and Samla pouted to herself. She thought she'd had this thing figured out. Wasn't Obi-wan in charge? Why did he always look at Anakin before answering any of her questions? She carefully stamped down on her impatience. She really wanted to see where these two men were going and what they were going to do. That was the -real- way to learn about them, to watch them with other people. Obi-wan gazed at her for a long time before he answered her and she felt as if he were testing her.
"Yes," his voice was calm, with a hint of amusement in it, as always, "As this is merely a social call, I see no reason why you can not accompany us on our way."
Samla grinned and sighed in relief, then held out her hand and waited. And waited. The jedi didn't seem to know what to do. Tipping her head in a reproving manner, she sighed. "You need to hold my hand. I'm little and might get lost in the crowd." Again she saw that glance. "Don't you have any little children?"
This time Obi-wan Kenobi did not need to share a communicating look with his apprentice before answering. "No, Samla, I have never had to take care of a small child before." Anakin was his first apprentice and had been almost ten years old when Obi-wan had taken him for his padawan. He reached out and took hold of her small hand and she stepped up right beside him as if she'd done it all her life, her eyes already wandering and taking in everything around them.
The trio moved out of the spaceport and into the market place of Li'jallin. Anakin watched their small charge out of the corner of his eye and noticed that Obi-wan was doing the same. She had such unbridled enthusiasm for everything. Her eyes touched everything, but she never strayed so much as a half step from the Jedi Knight's side. Shrewdly, she would take in every interaction she saw around her and noted carefully which races patronized which stalls and bought which foodstuffs. There was no doubting that she was filing that knowledge away for later and would give a complete report of what she saw to her father upon their return to the ship.
"Obi-wan, sir? May we go look at the carving booth across the way?" It was the first sound they'd heard out of her since leaving the spaceport and the older man graciously lead her to the booth she had pointed at. Samla waited till they had stopped moving to slip her hand out of Obi-wan's and pressed up close to the booth. Her eyes barely cleared the level of the counter.
"Would you like a boost, Samla?"
"If it isn't too much trouble, sir?" she nodded emphatically. Kenobi lifted her slight form up onto his raised knee and set her there. It gave her the height she needed to see, but the independence to complete the transaction on her own. He watched with interest as she minutely inspected the carved figure she finally chose and shrewdly bargained with the proprietor for it. Credits and figure changed hands and Samla slipped her purchase into her credit pouch and tucked the pouch back into her tunic.
Obi-wan set her back down on her feet and she immediately stuck her hand into Anakin's then waited for the men to move on. From experience, Obi-wan knew the value of those carved bone figures in the booth, and Samla had managed to bargain herself quite a deal on the one she'd chosen.
"Sammy, how did you know when the price was right?" he asked her after they'd gone a few paces.
"When we'd reached about half his original asking price he finally started bargaining hard, so I knew we were cutting into his profit. Another ten percent after that and his left limb started twitching. I figured that the price was low enough then." Those grey-green eyes locked on his own blue ones. "Was that wrong?"
"No, I believe you did very well. I just wanted to know how you knew." The girl thought about that and shrugged, which seemed to be her default gesture.
"I guess jedi teachers need to learn, too." Her tone was so solemn that he couldn't help but laugh a little.
"Yes, Sammy. Even jedi teachers need to learn."
*******
"There are all sorts of rumors out here in the rim worlds, Obi-wan. Rumors of a secret army being assembled." Lei-dean gazed over his shaggy shoulder to check on Samla, who was industriously organizing and taking an inventory of the contents of a crate he had pulled out of storage for her. "No one knows who is behind it or what the purpose might be, but it is something that we need to keep an eye on." The grizzled Wookie heaved a truly monumental sigh and shook his head, sending the translator he wore around his neck bouncing. "And on top of that we need to keep watch on this cloning business that's going on and the thousand and one other things that keep the galaxy from running smoothly."
"Lei-dean, where is your padawan, Bae-su?" Obi-wan asked. He had been friends with the younger girl but had yet to see her this visit.
"Oh, she became a Knight last spring, the young scamp. Last I heard she'd been sent clear to the other side of the galaxy to help stop some border dispute." The old Jedi Master lifted his eyes from their observation of Samla and fixed them on his younger peer. "Something doesn't feel right out here, Obi-wan. I hurried Bae-su's training and pushed for her trials to get her out of here. I have decided to ask the council to re-assign me elsewhere. I am too old to be caught in the middle of a fire-fight. I know that they need a pulse keeper out here, someone to keep tabs on everything, but this foreboding I feel." He trailed off and shook his head. "If I don't leave soon, I won't make it off this planet. I have seen it."
Obi-wan rocked back in his seat in surprise and heard Anakin's sharp drawn breath. The council had feared that things were heating up out at this edge of the rim, hence Obi-wan's visit, but they'd not realized the extent of it. "I will send a message to them at once. There should be room for you on board the transport that brought us."
"Master Lei-dean, sir?" The Wookie looked down at where the little girl had stepped up beside his chair, a datapad in her hand. She held the pad out to him and showed him the notations she'd made. "If you kept it organized you wouldn't need to keep buying extras because you'd know what you already have," she scolded. "Now, I didn't recognize all the different parts you had in there, so I put in a drawing and description instead of a name, but you can change that at your leisure. I'm sure you know what it is you bought." She smiled cheerfully up at him and then wandered over and plunked herself down on the floor between Anakin and Obi-wan.
Lei-dean blinked a few times in surprise. He'd expected it to take her far longer to clean up and organize that mess of extra lightsabre and droid parts. According to her tally, he had enough to build five more sabres, without crystals, with parts left over. "Hummph. You are right, Sammy. I would not have bought nearly so many extra parts if I knew how much I already had." He laid the datapad aside.
"Obi-wan, how long will it take you to contact the council?"
"I can contact them immediately and it should not be more than an hour or two for a reply."
"There's a high speed, secure link at the spaceport." When the eyes of all three jedi turned to her, Samla shrugged. "Traders use it all the time to contact buyers and their home stations. I have a Trader ID card you can use."
"Thank you, Samla. That is a kind and generous offer that we shall take you up on." Obi-wan and Anakin rose to leave so their young charge slipped her poncho over her head and trotted after them. Lei-dean saw them out the door and paused, framed in the rectangular opening.
"Please hurry, Obi-wan. My time is short."
Suddenly a dozen little details fell sharply into focus and, on Force inspired instinct, Obi-wan's saber was drawn and ignited. Anakin's was only an instant behind. The young jedi master placed a hand on Lei-dean's chest and shoved at the Wookie in an effort to push him back inside the small collection of rooms that made up his home.
The old master had been righter than he knew. He was now out of time. The blaster bolt that would have taken him in the center of his broad chest, instead cut into the side of his neck and he fell heavily to the dusty ground. It was the first in a hail of shots that screamed in at the jedi, but Obi-wan and Anakin were much younger and quicker than their fallen comrade and every one, with the notable exception of the very first, was deflected. At the first sign of blaster fire, Samla gave a shrill shriek and ducked under Anakin's outer robe. She pressed herself as close against him as she could and wrapped her small arms about his leg, one foot on his sturdy boot, the other leg wrapped around his.
"Samla," Obi-wan shouted. "Get back in the house!"
"No!" she half sobbed, half shouted against Skywalker's leg. "It's safer right here." The jedi Knight could feel her panic and fear, felt it spike at the thought of being separated from them. He let it be, since she was probably right. Who ever was attacking them would not simply leave her behind.
The two jedi slowly backed around the corner of the building, Obi-wan helping cover Anakin who was struggling to adjust to the awkward weight on his left leg. Samla, her face half buried in Anakin's hip, peered out at the fight intermittently as the jedi student's robe flapped open or closed. Every time he jolted one way or the other to deflect a shot, she whimpered in fear. Feeling this, Anakin pushed his focus farther into the Force to better anticipate the shots and make his movements smoother.
Obi-wan moved slowly to keep even with his apprentice and overlapped his defensive moves to add extra cover to Anakin's left side. For a brief moment he wished that he had the same rapport with Anakin that he'd had with Qui-gon. They'd been a seamless team in combat, each move, each thrust, block or parry a perfect complement to the other's. But Anakin was a different person and they had developed a different dynamic between them.
The instant they were around the corner and there was a break in the constant blaster fire, Obi-wan reached down and scooped up the little Tragoni girl, hugging her to his side with one arm. "Let's go, Anakin." The two jedi leaned into the Force and used it to speed their steps away from the ambush.
"Master, I have never seen those white armor uniforms before. Could they be the secret army Lei-dean spoke of?" Anakin and Obi-wan walked side by side through the Li'jallin market. Samla had refused to let Kenobi set her down, clinging to his neck like a mynock to a live power cable. Even now she watched their backs over his broad shoulder like a sentry droid, jumping at any flash of white she saw.
"Very likely, Anakin. I can think of no other possible reason for killing Lei-dean and attempting to kill us. They must have thought that he knew more than he did, or that the council would react with more alarm than they have. We should be alert. They have made one attempt, they may make another."
"Perhaps we should report this to Chancellor Palpatine, Master. If it is a threat to the Republic, then he and the Senate need to know."
"We shall see what the council has to say about it first, my padawan. If they deem it necessary, then we will alert the Senate." Against his side, Samla jolted yet again. "Sammy, I believe that we are safe for the time being. I do not think that they would risk exposure by coming after us in the market place."
"Daddy always says, 'better safe than sorry,' sir," she mumbled against his shoulder. "I'm gonna keep watchin'." Even so, her hold on the jedi Knight relaxed a bit and she didn't so much as twitch the rest of the way back to the spaceport.
*******
"Daddy!!" At first sight of her father standing under the loading cranes, Samla wriggled out of Obi-wan's arms and raced across the hanger floor and threw herself into his arms. "Oh, daddy, I'm so glad to see you."
The two jedi took their time closing the distance, watching the droids scuttle back and forth, loading and unloading cargo from the various freighters that were in port. "She was so strong and independent before, Master." Skywalker's tone was soft and a bit mournful.
"She is six, padawan. When you were her age, did you not run to your parent's arms for safety? Besides, she is still strong and will be stronger yet because of this experience." Obi-wan's blue eyes were grave. "Watch her still, my apprentice. She has more yet to teach us both."
Anakin mulled over his master's words as they walked the last few steps to the Tragonies. Always back to his mother. Obi-wan kept bringing him back to that. Hadn't he already dealt with it? He knew that there was nothing he could do to change that. The lesson had been learned. Why press it again and again? A youthful voice cut through his thoughts and brought him back to the present.
"And, Captain, their swords were bright light and they moved faster than the light bees on Alderaan. One was blue and one was green and they hummed really low, like the sound of the engine traveling up your spine when you're in the hidey-holes in the main hallway." Her father ruffled her short, bright red hair. "You've lost your cap, Sammy. Maybe now I can convince you to go without it?" His answer was a face that clearly said, 'forget it, no chance.'
"Gentlemen?" Nidaine greeted them as they approached and his eyes held more questions than he could frame at the moment. His daughter rarely asked to be held, let alone carried, but not only was she in his arms now, but had been in the jedi's arms just before. "How went your 'visit'?"
"There were unforeseen complications, Captain Tragoni. Our friend is dead."
"Dead?"
"Yes, we were ambushed coming out of his house, by men in white armor. I should warn you that if they felt strongly enough to ambush three jedi, they will likely not hesitate to sabotage your ship or endanger it in some way." Obi-wan searched the captain's face. "We will find other transport if you wish it."
Nidaine's eyes glinted and he drew himself up strait. It reminded Anakin very much of the way Samla responded when affronted by something. "The Tragonies have -never- failed to complete a single transaction and we will not start now just because there is a little danger. There has been danger before and will certainly be danger in the future, that changes nothing to which we have agreed." Perched on her father's hip, Samla gave a strong affirmative nod as he finished his little speech. "We will be loaded in two hours and ready to depart at your convenience there after, sirs."
"We thank you for your generous and honest services, Captain. We will depart an hour after local sunset if that is acceptable?" Captain Tragoni checked his chronometer and nodded. Obi-wan and Anakin each gave him a brief bow and strode away.
*******
Forty-five minutes after sunset the two jedi came aboard. Between them, they carried a large, heavy load. The body of Lei-dean. Samla had already replaced her lost cap with another of an indeterminate grey-brown color. She immediately dragged it off her head when she saw the burden that they bore. She, her father and the Twi'lek mate followed solemnly and waited in respectful silence as the two brown-clad men lay the blanket wrapped body in an empty bunk.
They all stood for a moment, thinking their separate thoughts. Obi-wan turned and addressed the captain, breaking the grave stillness.
"Captain, we are ready to leave, at your convenience."
It took Nidaine a few seconds to drag his gaze from the dead jedi master. "Certainly, sir. We will leave immediately."
*******
Anakin sat alone in the cramped room he shared with his master on the ship. His eyes were unfocused, staring at something beyond his view, beyond his knowledge. Master Lei-dean was dead. His own master was nearly as silent, dealing with his grief his own way and allowing his apprentice to do the same. Anakin's thoughts were jumbled and chaotic and he simply let them flow as they would. There was no point in ordering them now.
Images of Lei-dean mixed freely with scenes of Qui-gon, his mother, of teaching moments with Obi-wan, of all the different experiences he'd had since leaving Tatooine. There was so much to remember, some of it good, some of it bad, but all worth remembering, he realized. He focused on that thought.
It was all important, since it all went into making him who he was. He hadn't sorted it all out yet, but it was coming. He'd learned more about himself and how to better deal with the things around him in the last couple of weeks than he had in the last several years. And all because of one precocious little girl.
As if summoned by his very thoughts, there was a chime at the door. At his call it opened and Samla Tragoni stood framed in the portal. She waited, shy of intruding on his solitude, but confident in all else. Obi-wan had been right yet again. She had been as strong and confident as ever shortly after returning to the ship after her first brush with death.
"I'm sad for you, losing your friend like that."
"Are you?" Her phrasing surprised him more than the sentiment behind it. "Come in and sit, Sammy." He patted the space beside him on the bunk and she quickly perched herself there, her legs dangling well short of the floor. "Are you sad that he is dead or sad that I have lost a friend?" He did not for a second entertain the thought of asking her if she meant it. She would pull herself up the way her father did and give him that scornful look that was her's alone and acerbically state that she did not say things that she did not mean.
Brow furrowed, her grey-green eyes narrowed, she thought about that. "Both," she finally concluded. "I am sad that he is dead because he was alive. It is always sad when things die, especially nice things and he was a nice sort of person. Even if he did have too many spare parts." Her eyes glinted briefly with merriment at the thought. "And I am sad that you lost a friend. Friends can be hard to find, 'specially when you live on a ship like me. It's always sad to lose friends and you and Obi-wan have lost one today." Her soft eyes lifted from their scrutiny of the deck and peered up into his. "It's okay to be sad, you know."
"Is it? Even for someone as old as I am?" The words were out before he could think to rein them in.
"Of course. Just because you're older doesn't mean you don't still have feelings." Samla scootched closer to him on the bed and took hold of his hand. "My brother, Kirien," she began in a confiding tone. "He's a ship captain already, but every time he comes back from a run, he runs in a gives momma a big hug and tells her how much he missed her. He's much older than me, even older than you, I think, and he still misses momma. If it's okay for him, why not you and me?" Again, her calm reasoning completely disarmed Anakin. "I miss momma, too. Do you miss -your- momma?"
"Very much some times."
"Well, just remember that when this run is over, you'll see her again. That always cheers me up."
"That would cheer me as well, Sammy, but my momma is dead."
That earnest expression on her face never wavered for a second. "That just means it will be a little while longer till you see her, like a two or three stop run, instead of an out-n-back. She's still your momma and she still loves you and you still love her. A little while longer won't hurt either of you. And the longer you're away, the more you'll have to tell her about when you get back."
Was -this- the final piece to the puzzle of what Obi-wan was trying to teach him, of what he could learn from this girl? She trusted and loved and lived and learned and taught and seemed not to mind that others might not see life the same way. Samla would patiently explain it to anyone who asked in the best way she could.
A gentle squeeze of his hand preceded her parting words as she slid off the bunk with a soft thud. "I gotta go make dinner. Be sad for your lost momma and your lost friend, Anakin." she said solemnly over her shoulder. "It's okay. But you can't -always- be sad. Life wasn't meant to be always sad or we wouldn't -have- friends and mommas." And then she was gone through the doorway, but her words left a lasting impression upon him.
**Obi-wan, is this your lesson for me? Have you felt the sadness that hides deep in my soul? How is it that this child can see so clearly, know so piercingly?** Skywalker lay back on his bunk with just a touch of despair. **The message has been delivered, but I am unsure of how to carry out the instructions. How can I see through her eyes when all I have are my own?**
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