As we go through life we experience many highs and lows. The highs can offer a feeling that is unmatched by anything in the world. And the lows can seem like tomorrow is a long way away. But when those lows are accompanied with depression the whole world can seem like it is against you, seemingly to deny you every opportunity to ever be happy by placing one hurdle after another in front of you.
For
me, the lows have been many in the thirty-four years on this planet. Always
wondering if there was a chance to be truly happy with myself. And in all of
that, there were times when I just wanted to pack it in and call it a life. To
me, I felt that if I could never find happiness then living was a moot point.
But I continued to live and struggle with my emotions. Fighting each and every
day with the hope that this nightmare called life would go away. It wasn’t
until I finally reached the bottom, when I could go no further down, except
death that I decided that the only way left to go was up.
My
rise upwards started with the conscious decision to seek help. Starting with a
family doctor who was able to diagnose my condition and start me on a regime of
medication. Second was being referred to a physiatrist who could help me to
understand and teach me methods to help me combat my depression. It has now
been close to a year since I was first diagnosed and in that time I have
learned so much.
What
I have learned is that we have the ability to CHOOSE what we want and feel. If
we have a fancy for a certain type of food, we buy it. If we want a certain
type of car, we save for it. If we want to cry at a sad part of a movie, we do
it. If we want to laugh at a joke we were told, we do so. This fantastic ability
to choose is what separates us from the rest of the creatures on this planet.
Inasmuch
that depression is a chemical imbalance of the brain, it is also a state of
mind. Simply put, medications may control or ease the symptoms of depression.
It will not change the way you think. The way you see yourself and/or the world
is solely a matter of choice. We can either maintain a self-defeating cycle of
negative thoughts… or we can make a conscious decision to change are pattern of
thinking.
To
create change we must first understand what depression is, and how our thinking
can affect us. The way we interpret the world around us can mean the difference
between happiness and despair.
In
our journey of understanding, we must never limit our self to any one source.
Knowledge can come from your family doctor, a therapist, books, the Internet,
and support groups. Any place that can offer you important information is a
valuable place. The goal is to take what you have learned from various sources
and combine them into something that works best for YOU.
After
all, would a farmer grow corn in soil that is best suited for potatoes?
Certainly
not, and the same can be said for you. By taking the best of nutrients from
various sources and combining them you ensure that the seed you plant will be
the healthiest it can be. But knowing what you are planting is equally
important. If a farmer plants corn seeds, he does not have to dig them up
constantly to see that he has in fact planted corn. Instead he nurtures it by
tending to it on a daily basis knowing that the day will come when the seed
will produce an ear of corn.
So
you must do with your thoughts. Tend to your choice diligently with the
knowledge that the day will come when the seed you have planted will produce
what you have sown. If instead you constantly choose to dig up the seed you
have planted it will forever remain stunted and never grow into what you
desire.
The
choice is yours to make, for you truly reap what you sow. If you sow negative
self-defeating thoughts, that is what you will get. Or as I have mentioned, you
can choose to plant those things that are positive and allow them to grow.
Quoting a line from Manifest your Destiny (Harper Paperbacks, Copyright
1997), “Within you is a divine capacity to manifest and attract all that you
need or desire”. Begin the change to a positive way of life today.
For
those of you who wish to make the change and want some help getting started.
You can contact me by email at grant.aitken@sympatico.ca
or visit my web site at www.oocities.org/gaitken_ca.
Also check out the resources the web site has to offer.