Chapter Seven

Anyone who has the opportunity to visit Sathya Sai Baba, in Puttaparthi or any of His ashrams, will not only be blessed, but will experience a great spiritual change in their lives. It is a truly spiritual experience!

My own pilgrimage to the Lotus Feet of Sathya Sai Baba, took twenty one years, from the time I first heard His name in January 1974. Why the delay I hear you ask?

I would think my journey was marked out at an early age. When I was quite young, not yet into my teens, I heard a voice say, "You have a destiny!". At least I think it was a voice, or perhaps not a voice at all, but a loud "knowing" within, but then again perhaps from some source outside of myself. It was so quick and unexpected. Anyway, when you are about 9 or 10 years of age, one cannot be expected to go too deeply into analysing the source of such a momentous incident. What I can say is that for many years afterwards, I never ceased to wonder if this or that, was my destiny. When I left my home town of Killarney, Ireland, to take up a position in Dublin, and later to London, I would invariably ask myself, "Is this my destiny?", becoming, now, like a mantra over the years. I would eventually reflect, "No, it doesn't seem that important to be a destiny!"

Marrying, setting up home, starting my own business, none of these, important in themselves, would never measure up, I thought to myself, to such a fate as Destiny. So, I waited. Until I began to forget that fateful voice.

I had always had an interest in the Spiritual, having been reared in the Irish Catholic tradition. However, events such as deaths in the family, sent the mind searching for some truth, some logic, to our existence, eventually leading me to the Psycho/Spiritual study in 1973, and in turn, to the study and practise of Spiritual Healing, a year later.

My wife, Geraldine, and I belonged to a group which met in our home once a week, to talk about and practise healing and generally enquiring into esoteric studies. Using the "in" phrases of the psychic groups; chakras, kundalini, vibrations, karma, -these flowed so easily from our lips. It was at this time that someone from the healing group, made reference to an Indian, asking, "Did you ever hear of Sai Baba?". I had the unsavoury image of a U.S. west coast, Californian guru, highly popular back in the 1970's, and dismissed any interest. However, when the questioner repeated the question, some weeks later, adding, "He is a healer", naturally my curiosity was awakened. This time a little more was offered, like the fact that this Indian did healing, materialised objects, and was known to have raised people from the dead! This was too much! I had to find out more, but how? Where does one start? Find a book, that was the answer!

I managed to acquire a copy of Howard Murphet's book Sai Baba, Man of Miracles, and obtained, ironically enough, further information about Baba, from a Sai centre in California! (One of Swami's leelas, I'm inclined to think!) There and then I was hooked! I acquired a list of books, audio tapes, (no video tapes, then!) and purchased some delightful pictures of Sai Baba. Now events started to develop quite quickly, and my interest in healing grew also, but it was as if Swami sent me on a journey of change, smoothening out my orthodox Catholic thinking, a process which helped to open a window in my consciousness, allowing through a beam of radiant light, which continued to grow brighter and more radiant during those years of diligent study of other spiritual teachings.

My interest in spiritual healing laid the foundation for a spiritual quest, my Holy Grail! So many changes were wrought in my thinking, commencing with the understanding and acceptance of the long-forgotten philosophy of Reincarnation. When I was able to embrace this teaching, I give a public talk on the subject, at Stansted Hall, outside London, in 1979, and I started to talk on Sathya Sai Baba in 1985 to several groups in Dublin, including the Theosophical Society, and would speak of Him at our regular healings evenings, in our home. So much more opened up to me, rather like opening boxes within boxes, each containing a truth which lead me to a further, deeper discovery of my own long-lost Self. All this was in preparation for deeper wisdom that Swami was later to present to me through His discourses.

Interest in this "Spiritual Phenomenon", began to grow and I felt it was time to establish a Sai Centre in Ireland, and in company with other devotees, the Sathya Sai Organisation of Ireland, held the Inaugural meeting with 40 people attending.

Although initially set up in the Republic of Ireland, it was later enlarged into the all-Ireland fraternity that exists today. And in early 1995, I was blessed to go to India, to visit the source of my spiritual renewal.

Having read so many books and articles, seen umpteen videos, on the most loving, powerful, yet gentle Being to walk upon this earth, to actually see Him for the first time, was such a shock that I actually hoped He would not stop and talk to me! This is totally opposite to the hopes and wishes of thousands of others who visit Him again and again, and dare to hope for private interviews. I simply was not prepared for the enormity of this visit. As the Americans would put it, "It was awesome!" Fortunately, I had a chit which permitted me a front-line position, at Darshans, without queueing. There were occasions when I felt it was not right for me to have this privilege, then I would feel the strongest of impressions from Swami, encouraging me to use that which He gave to me. Not to be meek about it, but be courageous. "If you want to be meek," I felt Him saying, "you can be meek. If you want to be a stone, be a stone. But I want people of confidence and courage". He gave me so much during my stay there. No interview but lots of innerviews, as they say!

I was further graced by Him, to have the comparative comfort of an apartment, offered to me by Jean and Lucas Ralli, long-time devotees of Baba. Indeed, while Lucas was Co-ordinator of the UK. Sai Organisation, he and Jean very kindly joined us for that first official Sai Satsang (meeting) in Ireland. Later affiliating us to a full Centre status. (I'm grateful to Lucas, also, for his assistance in editing the early stages of this manuscript.)

In Baba's ashrams one has the distinct impression of being inside His womb-like aura, and being in constant communication with Him. Everything in the general area of this vast ashram is under His control. He organises, unseen, everything in that vast ashram. Seated in the darshan line, waiting for Sai Baba's appearance, one has time to think and, perhaps, meditate. Or just talk mentally to Swami. He knows everything that happens, thought, or said, by those present.

A sudden hush is the signal that He has appeared from His rooms, in the distance.
A flash of orange, and you know He is coming. Slowly stepping His way along the pathway between the lines of thousands of seated people, accepting letters and raising His right hand in blessing, or sprinkling them with His sacred Vibhuti. Hardly a sound is to be heard, other than the caw of the crows and the flapping of pigeon's wings, as He seems to float through the congregation, patiently looking at the upturned smiling faces, with their hands joined prayerfully.

On one occasion I raised up a bunch of letters from devotees back home, with the words, "Letters from Ireland, Swami." He reached towards me and with a scissors-like movement of His fingers, grabbed the bundle and moved on.

As an example of His omnipresence, I saw, on another occasion, His lotus feet being touched by eager devotees some distance from where I was seated, in a painful cross-legs position, on my cushion, and I thought how wonderful it would be if I too could touch the feet of the Avatar (called Padnamaskar). No sooner had I thought this, than He turned and came across and stood in front of me. I reached out and touch the hem of His orange robe, receiving the feeling of being ennobled. At another darshan I had even greater good fortune when He stood slightly to my left, I hesitated momentarily to touched His feet, but He slowly extended a small brown foot towards me, as if to say, "Go ahead, you may touch it!" These are prized and treasured moments for the devotee. Explaining the importance of Padnamaskara, Baba said to Dr. John Hislop, "God is positive, man is negative, If contact is made, the Divine current flows from positive to negative. For this reason the Indian tradition of touching a Divine person. But without some form of discipline and limitation, people would be touching face and body. Hence, the custom of touching the lotus feet".

The enormous Poornachandra Hall, built in 1973, is 220feet long by 140feet wide, with a floor capacity to seat about 15,000 people. Its unique feature is that it has no inside supporting columns in the middle, and is the largest free-standing auditorium in Asia. What a joy to be there on the most auspicious festival of the Hindu calender, Mahashivratri, the festival of the New Moon. About twelve hours before, I collapsed with heat-stroke, and was delirious all that night. I awoke during the night with the impression that it was raining heavily, and I thought how awful it was going to be for everybody, next day, with the rainwater turning the dust into mud. When I finally woke at dawn and raised myself up in my bed to look out of the window, I could see the the usual dusty dry ground that I was now familiar with. The "rain" sound I had heard was in fact the overhead fan, swishing gently.

My Sai colleagues, Dr. Jal Fanibunda and his brother Dr. Eruch B. Fanibunda, (author of Vision of the Divine), brought me an Indian dish in a tiffin, which had been flavoured with ice cream. This did the trick in reducing the fever! I was well enough to get up the following day and attend the festival and was amazed that I could sit without discomfort for over five hours. I am sure it was Swami's wish that I did not miss this occasion.

That evening I had arrived rather late, but still in time for the opening speakers. Presenting my chit, and my apology to a tall Indian gentleman, in a well-cut cream suit, he seated me at one of the openings, right under the steel roll-up shutters, open to allow a good flow of fresh air into the auditorium. It was an excellent position, giving me an clear view of the stage and Swami's chair. However, a moment later, I felt a tap on my shoulder by my tall Indian friend, who told me to get up and follow him. Taking my hand and leading me, like a school-boy, into the main hall, I was graced to be put sitting in a row by myself! -indeed, in front of the front row! -and directly in front of the stage where Swami sits listening to talks by visiting speakers.

At the conclusion of the twenty four hour festival, the multitude gathered there received Prasad (blessed food) served by the young male students, who handed the thousands of people present, a "plate" made up of large green leaves stitched together by tiny twigs. On this was ladled rice and vegetables, from enormous shiny urns. Not being sure of the protocol, I hesitated to commence eating and also wondered to myself what the vegetable dish was. At this point in my reflections Baba arose from His chair on the stage above me, where He oversaw everything, walked slowly down the side steps, and across to where I was seated on my cushion, and said, "Sweet-and-sour! Eat up. Eat up!", graciously answering both my thoughtful questions with one sentence!

After darshan one should sit quietly, no talking, as Baba says; "Always find a quiet corner after My Darshan where you may enter the stillness and receive the completion of My blessing. My energy goes from Me as I pass you. If you proceed to talk immediately, the precious energy is dissipated and returns to Me, unused. Rest assured that whatever My eye sees becomes vitalised and transmuted. You are being changed day by day. Never underestimate what is being accomplished by the act of Darshan. My walking among you is a gift yearned by gods of highest heavens, and here you are daily receiving this Grace. Be grateful. These blessings you receive will express themselves in their perfect time. But also remember, that to whom much is given, much will be demanded."

So, it is advisable to find a quiet place to meditate, or sit silently for a while in this glorious blessing. His grace, or spiritual energy, stays with you and is a truly uplifting experience. After all, that is why one goes to see Him, to be changed!

Once you make contact with Sai Baba, whether it's through a book or through personal contact, He will never let you go. He has said, "You may leave Me, but I shall never leave you. You are Mine forever!" What a glorious connection!

Despite the vast crowds in the ashram, particularly during religious festivals commemorating those of all major religions, it is still easy to find a quiet spot to sit and meditate, such as in the gardens. Statues of the spiritual deities of all religions, are there to sit and pray silently before, to the sound of gurgling waters from the tiny garden waterfall. It's a haven within a heaven.

On the occasion of the last darshan of my stay in Prasanthi Nilayam, I waited until the very last minute to see if I would be granted the much valued interview. It was not to be. Most of the devotees had left to get tea, etc. I stayed seated and turned around to find an Indian gentleman and his young son still seated immediately behind me. Without prompting they offered me vibhiti and said, "Swami will see you soon." This came as a surprised, and I thought did they mean that very day, but when I turned around again to ask them, they were no where to be see. It was now time for me to move and catch the bus to the airport outside Puttaparthi. The bus was about to leave so I tossed my apartment key into the desk and boarded the packed bus. I had to sit on bags near the door and hoped my baggage had been placed on board. Earlier I had taken them to the bus terminal inside the ashram and was told to leave them by the wall outside the small bank building.

On arrival at the airport I discovered my bags were nowhere to be found. The baggage handler took me to the baggage trolly which was parked on the runway, but there was no sign of them! I could only conclude that they were not put on board the bus. The baggage handler suggested returning with me to the ashram by taxi, and collecting them. We sped through the gates and drove to where I had previously placed the bags, to find them still there, untouched! All this time I had no fear or worry as to their loss. I was perfectly calm and absolutely certain everything would be alright. It was all in Swami's hands. I felt certain it was Swami's leela! We retrieved the bags and return to the airport, when the flight that was to take me to Bombay, had just landed. To this day I have no idea what the "play" was about. Perhaps a test of my faith and trust in Swami. However, I still hear the voices of those Indian devotees saying, "Swami will see you soon". Let's hope it will be really soon!

Returning home to Ireland, after three weeks at the Lotus Feet of Sathya Sai Baba, I was sure then that this was my Destiny; to have had contact with this Glorious Being, this Avatar of our time!

Darshan: To see a great spiritual Being and receiving His Blessing.