I see them together, always together,
He sits next to her, she hugs him, he acts cool,
Is it over? Has it all ended and I just didn't see the credits?
She voices she wants to spend time with him and not with me,
I sit there, quietly wondering,
Where is my sense of dignity and compassion?
Where is my joy for their happiness?
All I feel is an inner turmoil that boils up as a rage,
I want to tell her still...even though it may be too late,
Was I a coward and he the bold one to step forward?
Or did I do too much where he did enough?
I tire of this whole mess, I need an answer even if it isn't from her,
When will I have control of my senses?
When will the soldier, the pilot return and everything go back to normal?
Maybe it is time for me to move on, but what exactly does that mean?
Location change...mind change...interest change?
There's no one else who I would pursue here...I know that sounds selfish,
But what's a guy like me supposed to do?
I hate myself for this fury, this rage...I'm not normally like this,
I've gotten this way before and I don't like who I become,
The beast lurks and I need to love, not lash out with these fangs,
I've bled all of that blood away, right?
Then why am I still here...in this state of mind?