For those of you who don't read conf SPLEEN, here is Steve Johnson's
list of why Han Solo is cooler than Luke Skywalker:
1) Han spends a long time in Carbonite and comes out shooting; Luke
gets cold and acts like he's got cancer
2) Han's best frind--an ass-kicking Wookie; Luke's--a trashcan
3) (comparing ships to cars) Han had an old Buick; Luke had a faggy sportscar.
4) Luke never once got laid during the whole trilogy
5) Han's enemies--every bad guy in the galaxy; Luke's--his daddy
6) Han just needed a laser--he didn't have to use the force like some pansies we
could mention
7) When spending the weekend with Luke's family(aunt & uncle) you have to herd space cattle and shit; Hans friends (Lando)--you get turned over to Vader.
8)Han never once tried to sleep with his own sister
9) Harrison Ford--Han Solo, Indian Jones, Patriot Games, The Fugitive, etc.; Mark Hamil--Luke Skywalker, VOICE of the Joker, some bad movie with Kristy McNichol;
10) Han never once flew to a swamp to hang out with a wrinkled muppet with Fozzy Bear's voice and a bad grasp of grammar.
Text file Source (historic): geocities.com/garrison27
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