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> The Atlanta School Board, seeing what Oakland had
> done to cash into the 
> seemingly endless taxpayer dollar pipeline through
> Washington by labeling 
> African American slang as the language "Ebonics",
> has decided to pursue some 
> of the green themselves by designating Southern
> slang or "Hickbonics" as a 
> language to be taught in all Southern schools.
> Anyone proficient in the 
> language woud be a Hickophone. The following are
> excerpts from the 
> Hickbonics/English dictionary: 
> 
> HEIDE - noun. Greeting 
> 
> HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of the
> greeting above. Usage: "Heidi, 
> hire yew?" 
> 
> BARD - verb. Past tense of the infinitive "to
> borrow." Usage: "My brother 
> bard my pickup truck." 
> 
> JAWJUH - Noun. The state north of Florida. The
> capitol is Lanner. Usage: "My 
> brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck." 
> 
> BAMMER - Noun. The state west of Jawjuh. Capital is
> Berminhayum. Usage: "A 
> tornader jes went thru Bammer an leff $20M in
> improvements." 
> 
> MUNTS - Noun. A calendar division Usage: "My brother
> from Jawjuh bard my 
> pickup truck and I ain't herd from him in munts." 
> 
> THANK - verb. Ability to cognitively process. Usage:
> "Ah thank ah'll have a 
> bare (see below)" 
> 
> BARE - Noun. An alcoholic beverage make from barley,
> hops and yeast. 
> 
> IGNERT - adjective. Not smart. (see "Arkansas
> native") Usage: "Dem Bammer 
> boys sure are ignert!" 
> 
> RANCH - noun. A tool used for tight'nin bolts.
> Usage: "I thank I leff my 
> ranch in the back of that pickup truck my brother
> from Jawjuh bard a few 
> munts ago." 
> 
> ALL - noun. A petroleum based lubricant. Usage: "I
> sure hope my brother from 
> Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck." 
> 
> FAR - noun. A conflagration. Usage: "If my brother
> from Jawjuh don't change 
> the all in my pickup truck, that thing's gonna catch
> on far!" 
> 
> TAR - noun. A rubber wheel. Usage: "Gee, I hope that
> brother of mine from 
> Jawjuh don't git a flat tar in my pickup truck." 
> 
> TIRE - noun. A tall monument. Usage: "Lord willin'
> and the creek don't rize, 
> I sure do hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Paris
> sometime". 
> 
> RETARD - verb. To stop working. Usage: "My gampaw
> retard at age 65." 
> 
> FAT - voun, verb. 1. A battle of combat. 2. To
> engage in battle or combat. 
> Usage: "You younguns keep fat'n ah'm gonna whup
> y'un." 
> 
> RATS - noun. Entitled power or privilege. Usgae: "We
> Southerners are willin' 
> to fat for are rats." 
> 
> FARN - adjective. Not local. Usage: "I cuddint
> unnerstand a wurd he 
> sed....Must be from some farn country." 
> 
> DID - adjective. Not alive. Usage: "He's did, Jim." 
> 
> EAR - noun. A colorless, odorless gas: Oxygen Usage.
> "He cain't breathe... 
> give im sum ear." 
> 
> BOB WAR - noun. A sharp, twisted cable. Usage: "Boy,
> stay way from the bob 
> war fence!" 
> 
> JEW HERE - Noun an verb contraction. Usage: "Jew
> here that my brother from 
> Jawjuh got a job with that bob war fence comp'ny?" 
> 
> HAZE - contraction Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah,
> haze ignert. He ain't 
> thanked but a minnit'n 'is laf." 
> 
> SEED - Verb. Past tense of "to see". 
> 
> VIEW - contraction: verb and pronounUsage: "I ain't
> never seed New York 
> City.....view?" 
> 
> GUMMIT - noun. A bureaucratic institution. Usage:
> "Dem gummit boys shore are 
> ignert." 
>