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>

>You May Be A Yankee If:
>>
>>1) You think barbecue is a verb meaning "to cook outside."
>>2) You think Heinz Ketchup is SPICY.
>>3) You don't have any problem pronouncing "Worcestershire Sauce"
correctly.
>>4) For breakfast, you would prefer potatoes au gratin to grits.
>>5) You don't know what a moon pie is.
>>6) You've never had grain alcohol.
>>7) You've never, ever, eaten Okra.
>>8) You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork.
>>9) You've never seen a live chicken, and the only cows you've seen
are on
>road
>>trips.
>>10) You have no idea what a polecat is.
>>11) Whenever someone tells an off-color joke about farm animals, it
goes
>over
>>your head.
>>12)  You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on a poodle.
>>13)  You would rather vacation at Martha's Vineyard than Six Flags.
>>14)  More than two generations of your family have been kicked out of
the
>same
>>prep school in Connecticut.
>>15)  You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to
get
his
>>own TV fishing show.
>>16)  Instead of referring to two or more people as "y'all," you call
them
>"you
>>guys," even if both of them are women.
>>17) You don't think Howard Stern has an accent.
>>18) You have never planned your summer vacation around a
gun-and-knife
>show.
>>19) Your think more money should go to important scientific research
at
>your
>>university than to pay the salary of the head football coach.
>>20) You don't have at least one can of WD-40 somewhere around the
house.
>>21) The last time you smiled was when you prevented someone from
getting
on
>an
>>on-ramp on the highway.
>>22) You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed
stores.
>>23) The farthest south you've ever been is the perfume counter at
Neiman
>>Marcus.
>>24) You call binoculars opera glasses.
>>25) You can't spit out the car window without pulling over to the
side of
>the
>>road and stopping.
>>26) You don't know anyone with two first names (i.e. Joe Bob, Billy
Bob,
>Kay
>>Bob, Bob Bob)
>>27) You don't have doilies, and you certainly don't know how to make
one.
>>28) You get freaked out when people on the subway talk to you.
>>29)  None of your fur coats are homemade.

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