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>                          May 28, 1999>>>
>      The Top 12 Things Uttered by Yoda While Making Love>>>
>12> "Ahhh!  Yoda's little friend seek you!">
>11> "Excuse me while I put a shield on my saber, Sweetheart.">
>10> "Now you know why they put one of me in every Happy Meal,>     do you.">
> 9> "Cuddling, afterplay -- a Jedi craves not these things.">
> 8> "Down here, I am.  Find a ladder, must I!">
> 7> "Do me or do me not -- there is no try.">
> 6> "Early must I rise.  Leave now must you!">
> 5> "You know, this would be a lot more fun without Frank Oz's
>     hand up my ass.">> 4> "Happens to every guy sometimes this does.">
> 3> "When 900 years old you get, Viagra you need too, hmmmmm?">
> 2> "Who's your Jedi master?  WHO'S your Jedi Master?">>
>          and Topfive.com's Number 1 Thing Uttered
>                by Yoda While Making Love...>>
> 1> "Ow, ow, OW!  On my ear you are!">>
>    The X-Rated version of this list is on Top5's website:
>                  http://www.topfive.com>>
>[           This list copyright 1999 by Chris White            ]
>[  The Top 5 List   top5@topfive.com   http://www.topfive.com  ]
>[   Do not forward, publish, broadcast, or use in any manner   ]
>[    without crediting "The Top 5 List at www.topfive.com"     ]>>>
>Selected from 126 submissions from 47 contributors.
>Today's Top 5 List authors are:
>----------------------------------------------------------------
>Jeff Scherer, Brooklyn, NY            --  1  (8th #1)
>Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD           --  2, 6  (Hall of Famer)
>Kevin Freels, Burbank, CA             --  2, 12
>Brian Berry, Napoleon, OH             --  2
>Dave Henry, Slidell, LA               --  2
>Peg Warner, Exeter, NH                --  2
>Boyd Johnson, San Diego, CA           --  3
>Curt Cutting, Santa Monica, CA        --  3
>Jason Anderson, Birmingham, AL        --  4, 7
>Greg Pettit, Houston, TX              --  5, 6
>Jon Litfin, Columbus, OH              --  7, 9
>Jonathan D. Colan, Miami, FL          --  7, Banner Tag
>Geoff Brown, Farmington Hills, MI     --  7
>Perry Friedman, Menlo Park, CA        --  7
>Jeffrey Anbinder, Ithaca, NY          --  7
>Daniel Weckerly, Limerick, PA         --  8
>Mark Levine, Los Angeles, CA          --  8
>LeMel Hebert-Williams, San Fran., CA  --  9  (Hall of Famer)
>Bill Muse, Seattle, WA                -- 10, Runners Up name
>Mark Weiss, Austin, TX                -- 11
>Jim Rosenberg, Greensboro, NC         -- Topic
>Larry G. Hollister, Concord, CA       -- Honorable Mention name
>Chris White, New York, NY             -- List owner/editor
>Paul Williams, Omaha, NE              -- Ambience
>----------------------------------------------------------------
>            "Suck, these do!"    and    "Stud Muppets"
>        The Runners Up and Honorable Mention submissions
>    for today's list can be found on the Joke A Day website:
>              http://www.jokeaday.com/nftop5.shtml
>================================================================>
>                     Rumination of the Day>
>          As the F-14 screamed through the desert air,
>          the pilot eyed the rising launcher ramps and
>          wondered yet again if the missile sites were
>          a genuine threat or merely happy to see him.>
>                  (Thanks to Mike Cunningham)>
>================================================================>