THE SOUND BARGE
Profile - Santa Claus
Patron saint of Russia and Children and Merchants and Sailors; Bishop of Myra, Santa Claus has had a long long life. Born in probably the 3rd or 4th century AD, Santa Claus now lives in Dallas Texas with his wife Barbara (who is a fan of cartoon cat Garfield). He has lots of children though not all of them through marriage (if you know what I mean). He has several decoys, one of which is his brother, Cecil Ingrid, who lives in Lapland. Every Christmas he delivers presents with a "Ho Ho Ho Merry Christmas". After aproximately 2000 centuries he still does not know the name of his Reindeer. Although it should be pointed out that the Reindeer may only live as long as normal Reindeer and so this is forgiveable. His wife looks after them. He has no middle name and doesn't mind too much when people call him "The Great Santini". He was rather upset when Coca Cola managed to brainwash most of the world into thinking that his costume was Red and White instead of Green and White and has had only one choice - to dress as Coca Cola wish. Some little known facts about Santa Claus are - the fact that he sometimes wears Ginsters Pie underwear; he sounds a bit like Shaggy (no not from Scooby Doo - the singer); he finds it strenuous at Christmas.