To Boddad

Speaking from the tongue of an experienced simpletion who obviously would rather be an emasculed, infantile complain-ee. This note should be pretty easy to understand. All the warnings from the punk rock 101 courses over the years, since my first introduction to the, shall we say, ethics involved with independance and the embracement of your community has proven to be very true. I haven't felt the excitement of listening to as well as creating music along withreading and writing for too many years now. I feel guilty beyond words about thesethings. For example when we're backstage and the ligths go out and the manic roarof the crowd begins, it doesn't affect me the way in which it did for Freddy Mercury, who seemed to love, relish in the love and adoration from the crowd,which is something I totally admire and envy. The fact is, I can't fool you,any one of you. It simply isn't fair to you or me. The worst crime I can thinkof would be to rid people off by faking it and pretending as if I'm having 100%fun. Sometimes I feel as if I should have a punch-in time clock before I walk outon stage. I've tried everything within my power to appreciate it (and I do, God believe me I do, but it's enough). I appreciate the fact that I and we have affected and entertained a lot of people. I must be one of those narcissits who only appreciate thing when they're gone. I'm too sensitive I need to be sligthlynumb in order to regain the enthousiasm I once had as a child. On our last three tours, I've had a much better appreciation for all the people I've known personally and as fans of our music, but I still can't get over frustation, the guilt and empathy I have for everyone. There's good in all of us and I think I simply lovepeople too much, so much that it makes me feel too fucking sad. The sad little sensitive, unappreciative, Pisces, Jesus man. Why don't you just enjoy it? I don't know I have a goddess of a wife who sweat ambition and empathy and a daugther who reminds me too much of what I used to be, full of love and joy, kissing every personshe meets because everyone is good and will do her no harm. And that terrifies me to the point where I can barely function. I can't stand the thougth of Frances becoming the miserable, self-destructive, death rocker that I've become. I have it good, very good, and I'm grateful, but since the age of seven, I've become hateful towards humans in general. Only because it seems so easy for people too muchI guess. Thank you all from the pit of my burning, nauseous stomach for you letters and concern during the past year. I'm too much of an erratic, moody, baby! I don't have the passion anymore, and so remember, it's better to burn out then to fade away.

Peace, Love, Empathy

Kurt Cobain

Frances. Courtney, I'll be at your alter.

Please keep going Courtney, for Frances

For her life, which will be so much happier without me.

I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU!