Say Anything
Chapter 2
By: Jessi
We reached the restaurant and went inside, the others hadn’t come yet so we sat down at the bar and waited for them. Billy and Paul were the second ones to arrive, Benji and Joel walked in shortly after word. We all got seated and ordered our drinks. “Um, you guys I have something to tell you all. Jessie knows but I think you all should know too, especially you Paul.” We all nodded our heads and let Jenna continue. “Well I’m pregnant with your baby Paul.” She said looking down. “Really? You’re not shitting me?” Paul said giving Jenna a questioning look. Jenna shook her head, “I’m serious Paul. The first time we had sex two months ago, you got me pregnant.” People near us looked at us as we conversed, “Do you mind? We’re having a personal conversation and it’d be really nice if you didn’t eavesdrop, thank you.” I said to one couple looking at us. “Jenna, can we talk about this when we get home or something? Here is probably not the best place.” Jenna shook her head ‘yes’ and our food arrived. Joel and I finished our meals, “Joel can we go out there and talk? I really need to.” – “Yeah, okay.” Joel and I both put $10 on the table to pay for our dinners, we got out of the booth and walked out of the restaurant and into the mall area.
Joel took my hand in his and we walked a ways. “Joel, whats going on?” – “What are you talking about?” – “Why do you keep questioning our relationship? Is something going on or what?” – “I’m just curious, if something is wrong I wanna fix it you know?” – “Yeah, but I don’t know I guess it just kinda scares me.” – “How?” – “I don’t want you to break up with me or something.” Joel stopped walking and took both of my hands, “I’m sorry about scaring you. I would never break up with you, even if it were the end of the world. Jess, I love you more than anything and nothing is going on that you need to worry about. Just your sister and her baby.” Tears fell down my face as Joel spoke, he wiped them away and pulled me into a hug letting me cry on his shoulder. “Joel I love you with all my heart and I don’t want to lose you in any way.” I cried. Joel stroked my hair, “You won’t, I promise.” I felt kinda embarrassed crying in the middle of the mall, “Joel, I’m sorry. I’m being a huge dumbass about this and its nothing. I make such a big deal out of something that isn’t.” – “No you’re not. And its cool, I understand. Besides you’re my girlfriend you’re supposed to worry about us.” I laughed a little at his comment as his beautiful face beamed at me with a smile on it. I couldn’t help but smile back, I leaned forward and kissed him. He kissed me back and held the kiss, there we stood in the middle of the mall making out in front of everyone. We finally pulled away and went back to the restaurant. By the time we got in, we decided to leave.
We walked out of the restaurant and stood in the parking lot talking about where we should go next. I stood next to Joel and wrapped my arms around him and he wrapped his around me, we did this to keep ourselves warm and to let others know we were together.
“Where are we going?” Jenna asked being held in Paul’s arms. Paul rubbed Jenna’s arms to keep her from freezing, the night air was very nippy. “Jenna I think you and I should go somewhere and talk about our deal.” Paul suggested. Jenna looked at all of us and we nodded, she shrugged her shoulders and they left in Paul’s car.
As for the rest of us we had no where to go, we decided on going over to the twin’s place just to hang out. Joel and I drove in my car, Billy and Benji drove in Benji’s car since Billy came with Paul. We got into my car and Joel kissed my hand, “I love you Jess.” I gave him a smile and kissed him back, “I love you to Joely.”
Benji and Billy reached the house first but Joel and I followed close behind. We got in the house and sat down, not saying anything like usual. We sat in silence for awhile until Billy spoke up, “I have an idea.” We all looked at Billy signaling him to continue, “Lets play cards.” We shrugged and sat on the floor in a circular shape to play cards. “Lets start off playing, uh…” Billy drew a blank. “Go fish. We’ll play go fish.” I said shuffling the cards. “Strip go fish?” Benji asked excitedly. “What the hell? No not strip go fish.” I rolled my eyes and dealt the cards. “Man I lost.” Benji said getting up. “Me too man.” Billy said looking at his cards. “So did Joel, don’t worry you all can be losers together. You should call your band Loser Charlotte.” I said collecting the cards and straitening them out. “Excuse me?” Joel said shooting me a look. “I was only kidding.” I put the cards on the coffee table and stared back at Joel.
I turned to look at what Billy was doing when Joel tackled me. “Ah, Joel.” I said laying on the floor laughing. “I’m not a loser, and neither is the band. You’re the loser.” I pushed Joel off of me and I pinned him, “Yeah, but a loser you’re in love with.” Now Benji came up behind me and lifted me off Joel, he carried me into his room running as fast as he could. We reached his room and he threw me on the bed and tackled me, minutes later we were joined my Joel landing on top of us. Billy chose not to join in on our festivities and decided to go home. We laid on Benji’s bed for quite sometime, “Can I crash here tonight guys?” – “Yeah, sure why not.” – “K cool, let me call Jenna and let her know.” Benji and Joel shook their heads as I left Benji’s room to go call Jenna.
“Jenna I’m staying at the twins’ place tonight k?” – “Alright, I’m still here with Paul.” – “Oh, that doesn’t sound to good. But hey I’ll leave here early and we can talk about it when I get home k?” – “Sounds good, night.” – “Night.” And we both hung up. “Hey where did Benji go?” I asked sitting on the couch with Joel. “He went into his bedroom to get something, he’ll be right out.” I nodded my head then shrugged my shoulders, I waited for Benji to come out. When he appeared in the living room he had his guitar and a couple of pieces of paper, he sat on the chair that sat by the couch Joel and I were on. Benji looked at Joel and then at me, “Jess, we wrote this song and we want you to hear it ok?” I smiled, I loved being the first to hear the new songs, “Alright. I wanna hear it.”
Benji handed Joel a piece of paper with words scribbled on it, he kept the others for himself. Benji picked up his guitar and tuned it, he strummed a couple of cords for Joel to warm up to and then they were ready to begin. Benji and Joel both took a long sigh before continuing.
“Ok, this song is called Say Anything.” Benji strummed some more chords and Joel began to sing.
They stopped, and my mouth was literally on the floor. I fell in love with the song and said, as tears streamed down my face, “Oh my god. That was great, I love it.” – “I hope so, cause I wrote it about our relationship. You know all those questions and weird things I said to you?” – “Yeah.” – “Well this is why, I wanted to write a song about it.” – “Joel that is so sweet. You wrote this song for me?” – “Yeah.” – “He wrote another one about you too, but he doesn’t want to share it.” Benji commented. I gave Benji a hug, and I gave Joel the biggest hug and kiss I’ve ever given him before. Our kiss led us into his bedroom.
That night we made hot, passionate love. It was great, we hadn’t had sex much since the whole Jenna thing, or the apartment incident and since then I’ve tried to forget that. I did somewhat, but when Joel had sex with someone he’d say their name. While making love Joel yelled out ‘Jenna!’. I stopped and pushed him off of me, “What the hell?” I said getting off the bed and standing naked in the middle of his bedroom. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. Holy shit, I so did not mean to say that.” Joel said as he sat there scratching his head thinking over what just happened. “Holy shit is right. I cannot fucking believe you said that. Maybe I should go cause it seems as if I’m not wanted.” – “Jessie that’s not true. Come on, I know you wanna stay. I’m sorry, it won’t happen again.” – “You know damn well it won’t happen again. Maybe we shouldn’t do this tonight.” I said picking up my clothes and putting them as I found them. “Jess, look I’m really sorry. And you know I didn’t mean it, I wrote that song for you. God, you have to understand that I didn’t mean to say that.” – “Joel, I know. Okay, you don’t have to repeat it 10 million times when I heard you the first couple. Lets just take a break right now, I think we’re moving to fast from our previous problems.” – “What do you mean break?” – “Just give us some time alone with ourselves and to think about things that are going on between us.” – “I thought we worked things out.” – “So did I, but maybe just a little more time would help.” – “Fine. But I am sorry and I love you.” I blew him a kiss as I walked out the door.
I walked out of the house quietly not wanting to wake Benji. I got out of the house and into my jeep, I headed home with tears filling my eyes and streaming down my face. ‘God why did he always make me cry? Whether the tears were happy tears, tears of anger, or tears of sadness it was Joel who made me cry. Was he supposed to make me cry all the time? God I’m sounding like a pussy, stop crying and just get home.’ I thought as I turned corners and headed down streets to my apartment. I finally pulled into the garage thingy and ran upstairs to my apartment. I got in and closed the door, locking it, then running into my room, and throwing myself onto my bed. I lay there thinking about everything that’s been going between Joel and me. I figured Joel and I were soul mates, and maybe we were but it just didn’t feel like it. I fell asleep after hours of thinking what I did wrong, how I could fix it, and if it was even my fault.
The next day I woke up around noon cause the loud speaker was buzzing. I pressed the talk button, “Hello.” – “Jessie.” – “Yeah, who is it?” – “It’s me, Benji.” – “Oh hey. Hold on and I’ll buzz you in.” – “K.” I buzzed Benji in and waited for him to knock on my door, which is what he did minutes later. I opened the door, threw my arms around him, and began to cry. He held me as I cried knowing what happened, I wasn’t sure how but I figured he heard, was told, or just had that feeling something was wrong.
“Benji, does he not want me? Is Jenna more important to him?” I asked trying to get a hold of myself. “Jess, he loves you more than anything in the world, of course he wants you.” – “Then why is Jenna always appear in the conversation or something?” – “I don’t know.” – “Benji, I need to know something and you have to tell me. Be completely honest.” – “Okay.” – “Has Joel been having an affair with Jenna?”
“To be honest, I don’t know. If he has I don’t know about it, but I’ll found out if so. I’m sorry Jess, I really am. I know he wouldn’t do that type of thing, at least I don’t think so, but he really does love you even if he says the wrong things at times.” I nodded my head, “You’re right. I hope he isn’t having an affair either, especially with Jenna. I’m just going to try to forget about it.” Benji pulled me into a hug, “I know, I know.”
I finally closed my door and welcomed Benji more welcomely, I felt bad for pouring all my feelings on him as he stepped in the apartment. But I needed someone to know how I felt, Jenna wasn’t home and she wouldn’t have been the best to talk to about this stuff since she could have been involved.
“So why’d you come over?” – “Well I didn’t see you this morning and I heard you leave last night, so I wondered.” – “Oh I’m sorry. I tried not to make to much noise, I didn’t want to wake you up.” – “Its ok, I was awake anyway. But you didn’t know that so its ok.” I smiled, “Do you want some coffee or something?” – “Coffee sounds great.” – “Lets go to Gloria Jeans and get some, I’d like to talk to you more about whats going on if that’s ok?” – “Excellent idea. I’m here to listen, so you can pour your heart out.” He smiled back and I stopped to hug him as I walked to my room to change my clothes and get my shoes. Moments later we were out the door and in Benji’s car.
~*Benji’s Point Of View*~
“Benji how come you don’t have a girlfriend?” – “I don’t know, I just don’t. I guess cause I’m not really looking.” I lied through my teeth, I was looking and I did find. “Oh, makes sense.” – “Wait I take that back, I do like someone but she has a boyfriend.” I said quickly thinking maybe she won’t figure it out. “Oh I’m sorry.” – “It’s not your fault.” I smiled weakly, I hated lying to her. Jessie was everything to Joel and I but if she found out that I liked her just as much as Joel she’d probably flip and hate me forever. I couldn’t tell her but I wanted to badly, but I kept it to myself waiting for the right time to tell her.
“Well who is the girl?” I turned my head quickly looking at Jessie, I felt my face get hot. “Um, I’m not going to say.” – “Oh come on, I won’t tell anyone. Do I know her?” – “I think so, but I’m not going to say.” – “Alright, keep your mystery girl a mystery.” I laughed, “Nice way to put mystery in the same sentence twice.” She laughed with me, “Maybe I meant too.” – “Whatever.” We pulled into a parking space and walked up to Gloria Jeans. We ordered our drinks and sat down.
“Are Jenna and I a lot alike? I choose not to think so, but what do you think?” – “I think you and Jenna are very different.” – “Really, how do you think?” I cleared my throat, “Well you have different personalities, style, likes and dislikes, and no offense to Jenna but she’s more of the slut.” Jessie nearly spit her coffee out on me, but she didn’t she just laughed. “She is more of a slut, she’s always been that way. And I wouldn’t have taken offense.” – “Alright. I’m glad you kept your coffee in your mouth and not spray it on me.” – “Sorry about that, it was just shocking and funny.” We laughed and then sat in silence.
I took a drink of my coffee, and Jessie spoke up, “Benji, do you love me?"