Between You And Me
Chapter 5
By: Sarah
I pulled Benji out into the hall and down the stairs. I could already hear Jordan saying how great the place was and everyone once in a while, Farah would agree. Benji stopped me halfway to the family room and bit his lip, rubbing his hands messily through his shaggy hair.
“ What?” I asked. He shrugged.
“ Things are good?” He asked. I nodded, grabbing him by the hips and pulling him toward me.
“ Things are peachy.” I said and leaned forward to kiss him. He started laughing halfway through the kiss and started tickling me. I pulled away, shrieking. He chased me out into the family room where I smashed into the sofa and practically bounced off it and fell onto the floor.
“ I guess you guys made up.” Maygen smiled down at me. Joel seemed to think me falling on my ass was hilarious, so he was bent over cackling. I laughed and nodded as Benji ran in and tackled me on the ground.
“ They were fighting?” I heard Farah comment with a little too much enjoyment. I pushed Benji away, mock kicked him in the ribs and quickly jumped up. He stayed on the ground, clutching his ribs with a big grin on his face.
“ Someone’s gonna be loud tonight.” Joel joked, rolling his eyes. I laughed, and punched him lightly on the shoulder.
“ Anything is better than those monkey noises I hear sometimes…” I said, ignoring Benji’s hands as he reached for someone to help him up. Joel laughed, puffing his cheeks out and pulling at his ears in his best monkey impression.
“ Mayg loves the monkey and his giant banana.” Joel laughed. Maygen tried hard to act annoyed, but she couldn’t help but laugh with him. I giggled and then turned to Jordan and Farah.
“ Hey guys!” I said, hugging Jordan. Farah reached down and helped Benji up, but didn’t even acknowledge my existence.
“ Hey, Nic. How’s the weather been?” Jordan asked, looking around. I thought for a second.
“ I don’t know…we haven’t been outside very much.” I said with a laugh. Benji laughed too and reached over and grabbed my side, making me jump. Jordan rolled her eyes and sighed.
“ Only you guys would be in Hawaii and spend all day inside.” She sighed. Farah looked directly at me and I smiled at her. She only frowned and then looked away. I sighed, not sure what else I was supposed to do.
“ Oh we plan on going outside tomorrow, I guess.” Benji shrugged.
“ You guys can go unpack if you want.” I said, pointing out to where the stairs were. Jordan smiled and nodded, grabbing her luggage. Farah followed. “ Want some help?” I called after them. Jordan nodded.
“ Yea, that would be good.” She said. I walked after her and grabbed one of her suitcases. I turned around to Farah.
“ Need any help?” I asked. She shook her head.
“ No, I’m fine.” She said shortly. I nodded and frowned.
“ Do you think we could talk?” I asked. She shrugged and nodded.
“ Yea, if you feel that’s necessary.” She said as she brushed past me upstairs. I paused at the bottom of the steps, frowning. I was so confused by her behavior. Had I done something wrong and not even realized it?
I followed Farah up to the empty rooms and she slammed her bags down on the bed. I sighed, not even sure where to start. I closed the door behind me and sat down on the edge of the bed, watching her as she hurriedly unzipped her bags and started putting her clothes into the drawers.
“ So?” She said sharply. I frowned, shaking my head.
“ Can’t you at least tell me what’s going on? For the last few weeks you’ve just…acted like you hate me.” I said, my voice pleading. Farah hesitated for a second and then she shrugged.
“ I guess I just don’t understand you. Maybe you’re not who I thought you were.” She said, glancing up at me. I was surprised at her answer and hoped she was go further.
“ Not who you thought I was?” I asked. She nodded and slammed a drawer closed.
“ You used to be like…the spokes person for true love and holding out for the right person, and now look at you.” She glared at me, her hands on her hips. I wasn’t even sure if I understood what she was talking about.
“ I don’t…understand, Farah.” I said, my voice unsure. She groaned.
“ You were in love with Benji, right?” She asked. I nodded.
“ I still am—“
“ Ohh…don’t feed me that bull shit. The old Nic would have never taken that shit head back after he FUCKED another girl—“
“ HEY!” I said, my anger rising. No one could call Benji a shit head except me.
“ No, LISTEN.” She said, her voice angry and accusing. “ You don’t even care that he slept with some groupie?! What makes you think he won’t do it again? There are tons of girls that are prettier than you and he has access to tons of them. You’re such a hypocrite. Dating him just because he’s famous. It’s not like you really love him. It’s not like he really loves you.” Her words were like bee stings, attacking me over and over. I couldn’t even speak, my voice frozen in my throat. I wasn’t sure whether to be completely crushed, or horribly angry. I was trying hard not to cry, but her words were ringing hard and fast in my ears.
“ How can you…” I stuttered. “ What are you talking about!” I said finally, standing up. I wiped roughly at the tears in the corners of my eyes and looked at her. She shrugged.
“ Come on Nic, you aren’t that naïve are you? When he’s fucking you, he’s not really thinking about you. He’s thinking about Shannon. You’re fucking clueless…but then again, I guess you deserve each other. He’s with you cause he feels obligated and you’re with him because you can’t get anyone else. It wouldn’t surprise me if he’s cheated on you again.” She said. She paused for a second and then went back to putting her clothes away. I stood there, shocked for a few seconds, not sure what to do. Farah just ignored me, pretending I wasn’t standing there, tears streaming down my face. Hadn’t we once been best friends? What were these words coming from her mouth? All these lies?
“ He wouldn’t do that to me.” I said finally. She looked up at me and stared me straight in the eyes. Her icy blue eyes looking straight through me.
“ You sure about that?” She asked, her voice soft but stern. I frowned, my mind racing.
“ Nic, wanna help me?” Jordan said poking her head in the room. I didn’t move. “ What’s going on?” She said, her voice worried. I heard her walk into the room and a second later I felt her hands on my arms. “ Nic?” She asked. I shook my head, looking away.
“ I told her what was bothering me and she just can’t handle the truth.” Farah said. My vision was blurry, so I couldn’t see Farah’s face but I could clearly hear the amusement in her voice.
“ Nic?” Jordan whispered. I shook my head again and then practically ran out of the room, pushing Jordan away. I ran out into the hallway, my heart overwhelmed with confusion and hurt. I smashed into someone and they caught me in their arms.
“ Nic? What’s wrong?” It was Joel. I looked up at him and he looked unbelievably worried. I shook my head and buried my face in his chest as he hugged me. “ It’s ok…what happened? I heard Farah shouting…” He drifted off. A few seconds later I heard someone come up the stairs.
“ Nic! What’s going on?” It was Benji. Joel slowly let go of me and gave me to Benji. “ What happened?” He looked up at Joel, who shrugged, just as clueless. I crumpled to the ground, my chest heaving. Benji sat down with me, taking my face in his hands. “ Suga, what’s going on? What’d she say to you?” He asked. I wrapped my hands around his arms, holding him tight.
“ I don’t know… no one ever said anything so horrible…so horrible to me.” I said, leaning back against the wall. Benji gently rubbed my knees and took my hands in his, kissing them softly.
“ Do we need to ask her to leave?” He said quietly, tilting his head so he could see me from under my lowered head. I didn’t know.
“ She hates me. She kept telling me all these lies.” I said softly. Benji blinked and reached up to push my hair back.
“ Whatever it was, it was just lies, Nic.” He said. I nodded and took a deep breath.
“ You would never stay with me just because you felt…obligated to, would you?” I asked, looking up into his dark eyes. He looked confused for a second and then shook his head.
“ Nic, jesus…I think you know the answer to that.” He said, shaking his head. I nodded and squeezed his fingers. “ Come on, why don’t we go downstairs and watch a movie or something?” He asked, slowly standing up. I nodded and let him pull me up.
“ Did you bring movies with you?” I asked. He smiled devilishly.
“ Yea. Stars Wars.” He said with a laugh. I smiled, shaking my head.
“ You are pure evil.” I said. He nodded and laughed.
“ You know it.”
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Once Benji and me got to the family room, we started fighting over who got to lie down on the sofa. Benji, being bigger than me, started shoving me to the side as I made a mad dash for the couch. I punched him in the stomach as I pushed him away and I laid down quickly. He groaned and started grabbing at my arms and legs, pulling me up.
“ Can’t we share, Nic? Please?” He whined. I shook my head.
“ Kiss me and maybe I’ll think about it.” I smiled. He laughed and leaned down and pecked me on the lips.
“ Alright, now get up.” He said, tugging on my arm. I frowned.
“ That was hardly a kiss.” I pouted. He shook his head.
“ It was a kiss.” He objected. He leaned down and in one quick sweep, he scooped me up off the couch. “How do ya like that!” He laughed. I tried to get away, but he gripped me tighter. Then, before I knew it he dropped me on the floor and ran to the sofa, sprawling out.
“ Benji.” I whined, pulling myself off the floor and over to the couch. I started yanking at his arms but he was way too heavy. I ended up just crawling on top of him and lying down. “ Look, we can share.” I said, pressing the side of my face into his chest.
“ I hope you don’t break one of my ribs.” He groaned, shifting his weight underneath me. I gasped and poked him hard. He smiled and tickled me for a second. “ So, things ok?” He asked, wrapping his arms around me. I shrugged.
“ I guess so. As good as they could be.” I said, my mind floating back to Farah. He sighed and I heard him let out this little groan.
“ What did she say to you?” He asked. I closed my eyes, feeling the faint beat of his heart against my skin. I shook my head, her voice running through my head.
“ Just that…I don’t know.” I swallowed and then looked at him, resting my chin on his chest. He gently reached down and brushed his fingers over my cheek.
“ I love you, Nic.” He whispered. “ You are the most important thing in my life.” I smiled and pulled myself closer to him. I loved lying with him, he always made me feel so safe. The warmth of his body against mine…I couldn’t think of anything more comforting or perfect. I sighed and kissed the soft, worn cloth of his t-shirt. He slipped his hand under my shirt, gently rubbing my sides. Just as I was getting comfortable, Joel bound down the stairs, surprising both me and Benji. We sat up, wondering what was going on. Joel sighed and shook his head. He looked mad, excited and confused all at the same time.
“ What?” Benji asked as I slid off his lap. Joel sat down across from us and sighed again.
“ What?!” I asked.
“ I got a call from Paul.” He said. Benji shrugged and nodded.
“ And?”
“ They found us a new drummer.” Joel smiled broadly. Benji frowned for a second but then he broke into a huge grin. I smiled and squeezed his arm.
“ Who?!”
“ Well…” He faded off. He suddenly looked sick. “ It’s this guy, Chad Watters. He’s an awesome guy, I’ve seen him play a few times.” Joel said. Benji nodded, looking even happier by the second. They had been searching for a drummer for a long time. “ He’s really interested in playing with us…but…I mean, we gotta meet him first, ya know?” Joel said. Benji agreed.
“ Yea, totally. So what the problem?” Benji asked, already sensing that there was a catch. Joel groaned and shook his head.
“ Chad’s got an offer from another band. Paul didn’t say what band, but it’s a good one. They’re going on tour in four days. If we don’t get back to Maryland by Tuesday, we won’t be able to meet him. And then…there’s no chance he’ll be playing with us.” Joel said. My heart stopped. Tuesday? That was the day after tomorrow!
“ Benj.” I said, glancing at him. He looked torn.
“ What do you mean?” He asked. Joel took a deep breath.
“ Well, we gotta meet this guy, ya know? And he already likes the other guys from the other band. But he’s willing to meet us and see how things go. Benj, we really need a drummer, you know. We really need to meet this guy. He’s awesome.” Joel said, his voice a mixture of pleading and certainness. I looked up as Maygen walked down the stairs, her eyes slightly red. I frowned. This wasn’t a good sign.
“ You’re leaving?” I asked, looking at Joel. He looked at me, his eyes guilty. I shook my head. “ You’re really leaving only after being here two days?!” I asked him, surprised that Joel would do that.
“ Benji has to go too.” He said. I froze, my hand in his. He squeezed it, but I pulled away and turned to him.
“ Benji.” I said. He looked away for a second and then looked back.
“ Shit, I’m sorry, Nic.” I took a deep breath.
“ But…”
“ This is really important.” He said softly.
“ And we’re not? This isn’t?” I asked, getting slightly angry. Joel sighed and shook his head. He crawled over to me and took my knees in his hands.
“ Nic, you gotta understand. We don’t want to go but…if we don’t meet this guy, then who knows when we’ll find another guy who can do the job. This is like… a perfect opportunity.” He said. I nodded, but I was still angry. I started cursing under my breath.
“ Nic…” Benji said, he reached over and tried to touch me, but I pulled away. Maygen was crying again and it wasn’t helping me. “ Talk to me, Nic.” He asked. I felt a tear fall down my cheek. Just what I needed. More drama.
“ We’ve been here two days, Benji! Two fucking days! You’ve been working and touring and…you’ve been gone for…forever! I just… don’t you want to stay? Don’t you want to stay with me? I don’t…” I shook my head, my words coming out in jumbles. Benji took my arms.
“Yes! I want to stay with you, Nic. But…I can’t just let this slip away. I have to go do this, for the band, for the guys. You and Mayg can stay down here…ok? Have a girls week.” He said. I shook my head, angry. I swallowed hard, trying to make sure I didn’t say something I would regret.
“ I hate this.” I said inbetween gasps, as tears rolled down my face. I stood up and walked away. I couldn’t deal with it. The thought of having him leave me again. This wasn’t fair at all! I heard Benji call after me, and then Joel, but I ignored them both. This was definitely turning out to be the worst vacation of my life.
I slipped outside and took a few deep breaths. It was nearly five by now, and the sun was going to set soon. The sky was streaked with orange and purple and I couldn’t help but cry. I sat down on the edge of the porch, my face in my hands and I cried.
This wasn’t going to work out.
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I was out on the porch for a few minutes before I heard Maygen come outside. She sat down next to me and it took me a few minutes, but I eventually looked over at her. Her eyes were just as red. She gave me an understanding smile.
“ It’s going to be ok, Nic.” She whispered. I nodded, wiping my eyes.
“ Why…” I asked, shaking my head.
“ I don’t know.” She said, reaching over and hugging me.
“ He loves his music more than me.” I whispered. She shook her head.
“ No, that’s not true. This is really hard for them too, Nic. Neither of them want to go…but they have a responsibility to Paul and Billy.” She tried to explain. I understood, but I still hated it.
“ This is too hard.” I whispered. She nodded, pulling away gently.
“ It’s going to be ok.” She nodded. I sniffed and closed my eyes. My heart was in a mixture of emotions. Hurt, anger, love, hate, confusion… She took my hand and smiled. “They are going to have to leave tomorrow night, Nic.” She said, her voice had a tone as if she were explaining something very complicated to a small child. I felt like a small child. I was confused, hurt, bewildered, and wondering why this was happening and not truly understanding the reasoning behind it.
“ Ok.” I nodded.
“ Make the most of tonight.” She whispered with a half smile. I smiled, bitter sweetly.
“ I wanted to make the most of these next few weeks.” I whispered.