Santa is Pissed !

T'was the night before Christmas -
Old Santa was pissed
He cussed out the elves
and threw down his list
Miserable little brats,
ungrateful little jerks
I have good mind to scrap the whole works

I've busted my butt
for damn near a year
Instead of "Thanks Santa"
- what do I hear?
The old lady complains
cause I work late at night
The elves want more money & the reindeer all fight!

Rudolph got drunk
and goosed all the maids
Donner is pregnant
and Vixen has AIDS
And just when I thought
that things would get better
Those a**holes from IRS sent me a letter!

They say I owe taxes -
if that ain't damn funny
Who the heck ever sends
Santa Clause money?
And the kids these days...
they all are the pits.
They want the impossible;
Those mean little shits!

I spent a whole year
making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls...
Their arms, legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yo's -
No request for them
They want computers and robots... they think I'm IBM!

If you think that's bad...
just picture this
Try holding those brats...
with their pants full of piss
They pull on my nose -
they grab at my beard
And if I don't smile..  their moms think I'm weird

Flying through the air-
dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys
and skinning my knees
I'm quitting this job!
There's just no enjoyment;
I'll sit on my fat tush and draw unemployment

There's no Christmas this year_
now you know the reason;
I found me a blonde..
I'm going SOUTH for the season!!
I'll lay in the sun-
into bed I'll get tucked
And those snotty nosed brats - can go and get  ****ed!

Hmmmm...   Now there is someone with no Christmas Cheer
Lets go BACK and find another version to see if it is still out there

Created by the 'LAZ'  CHRISTMAS !999