Part Five - Pretty Purple Pills

I feel tired. Can’t sleep. She’s haunting me again. I’m lying on the ground holding the blankets over my face. She’s out there. Looking.

Looking for me. I want to run away. Find safety, but can’t. She’s too near.

I saw her last night. She had not seen me. No. Never. She never sees me. I can see her, but not now. Only sense her. Feel her.

Bony hands. Melting flesh. Yellowed teeth. She wants me. She needs me.

I love her.

Cannot move. Very silent. Cracking bones, shattering screams. Her voice. Calling out my name.

Sweating. Panting. I feel her. She is above me. Searching. Waiting. Wanting.

I squeeze my eyes shut. She won’t see me. Be every silent.

I smell the flames. She lifts the sheets. I scream…

Dreams. Justin shakes me hard. “Dreams,” he says, “she’s gone. Laura is gone.”

JC is sitting on my bed putting cigarettes out on my legs. Justin prepares my arm for morphine. I don’t want any. Don’t need any.

I squirm to get away from the needles. Justin begs. Pleads. Which turn into threats.

JC pulls out pills instead. Purple pills. He gives me there and calls them…

My Laura is dead. Death is her now.

I close my eyes as Justin and JC leave. JC still smells like what stranger I saw a few days ago. The door shuts.

Eyes open. They turned the lights off. I cry.

I miss my angel. I know. I remember. She is gone. She is…

Pills. Getting hazy. Blurry. Everything… colors.

She holds me in her arms. I sleep. Pretty purple pills.