By Gen X
Azkaban is hell.
Time grows meaningless, marked by thoughts and the passage of people.
Dementor passes. Dementor. Chills go up my spine.
Try not to hear the screams, try to block them out. Wonder how long it's been. Wonder what the world is like. Wonder how long it will be until I start to scream.
Dead prisoner. Picture myself.
Wonder how long it will be until that.
Dementor. Dementor passes. Feel strangely numb.
Relive the moment. Relive running into James and Lilly's house. Hear the crackling and burning, feel the fire. Stumble outside to retch. Realize I've forgotten the baby. Realize the baby is alive.
Two Dementors pass. Feel strangely hollow.
Feel the dull ache. Feel the emptiness each time they pass. Feel the faint relief I get when they leave my door for just an instant. Start to live instant to instant.
New prisoner passes.
Recognition sparks. Fighting. Remember the fighting. Remember the rise of Lord Voldemort. Remember burying the body. Remember the scars of war.
Dementor. Chill.
Remember the victims of war.
Demenetor. Chill.
Remember that night that my best friend died. Screaming. There was screaming.
Dementor. Chill.
Before the screaming. Remember Dumbledore. Remember the growing sense of dread. There was a traitor. Remus was the traitor.
A person on tour. Look with curious eyes. Resent that they get to leave.
No, not Remus. Thought it was Remus.
Dementor. Chill.
Peter was the traitor. Peter betrayed them.
Dementor. Chill.
It was my decision to trust Peter.
Dementor. Shiver.
My decision to save them.
Dementor. Despair.
I killed them.
Dementor. Death.
I deserve this.
Dementor. Drowning.
I deserve hell.
Dementor. Darkness.
fin