About the same time Bart was moping on the East coast, Reccea was having fictive problems of her own on the West coast. She frowned at Roy and Dick. "I promise," she swore solemnly. They looked at her skeptical. Sighing, she leaned back in her uncomfortable wooden chair. "Okay, what do you want me to say?"

"It isn't what we want you to say, babe." Roy folded his arms and glanced at his significant other fictive. "It's what we want you to write."

Reccea threw her hands up in the air. "I'll write nookie! I will! Soon!"

Dick shook his head. "It isn't working, Roy. She's going to put it off forever."

Roy glared at his writer. "You put me through the pain of admitting my feelings to this guy, of making me bi, and I don't even get nookie out of it?"

"Oh, please." Reccea rolled her eyes. "I hear you two. You're getting your nookie everywhere but on paper."

It was then that the plot hole opened, dumping Bart Allen onto the desk. He stumbled slightly but then caught his footing. Conversation instantly died as Reccea and her Guinness Boys stared.

"You have a Bart fictive?" Dick looked totally surprised.

"Not last I checked," Reccea responded equally confused.

Bart looked at the fictives. Dick and Roy stood in front of him looking exactly the same as the clones that lived at Noel's place. Then, he looked at the desk around him. He double checked to make sure the plot hole didn't take him to another part of his computer desk. Eventually, he spotted the different chair, not to mention the different girl sitting in the aforementioned chair. Then, he realized they were all staring at him. "Um... hi," he offered.

Roy was annoyed. He turned to Reccea and yanked on her hair. She winced. He couldn't do that to her! He was her favorite. "Sure you can't give us enough time or enough nookie but you can go get a new fictive."

Dick grabbed Roy around the waist and hauled him backwards. "I'm sure there's a rational explanation."

Reccea looked at Bart to figure exactly that out. "I swear Roy! He's not mine!" She rubbed her head where he'd yanked on her hair. Reccea bent down to eye level with the tiny Impulse fictive. "Who do you belong to little fellow?"

Bart scrunched up his nose. Little fellow? Heck, the next thing she'd probably do is insult his feet. Where the hell was Kon and what was up with these questions? Sheesh. If he stayed here, he'd be an old guy by the time he explained everything. Nope, not going to do. He sped off. He'd find Kon himself.

And the Bart fictive was gone, leaving everyone without answers. Roy was still glaring at his beloved writer. Dick was rubbing his face. Finally, Reccea's eyes lit up. "He belongs to Noel! He's Kon's little Bart fictive!"

Roy's jaw dropped. "You....You slashed Superboy! You don't care about me anymore do you!" Dick winced, but said nothing. He'd learned long ago to keep out of Reccea and Roy's little tiffs. Even if they did make him a little jealous.

"Wha--" Reccea protested.

"You're just going to slash everyone and leave Guinness on the cutting room floor. I'll have no sex and no story. C'mon Dick. Let's get the hell out of here." Roy stalked off, followed by a cross looking Dick.

Reccea glared darkly at her computer screen. "Noel, I'm going to kill you."

It wasn't long after that when Reccea felt a tiny breeze blow past her. Then another, the second time she felt the breeze before she saw the speeding colors fly by on her keyboard. Bart had effectively closed all the applications she had opened. Reccea narrowed her eyes. She glared at the computer picturing her sometime co-writer. "Going to kill and chop up into tiny little pieces."

Bart was getting upset. He'd been all over this stupid room. There was tons of crap on the floor and messy stuff all around. How did someone expect him to deal with this? He got his foot tangled in a random shirt. That was it! Next time he came over, Kon had to do housekeeping. After five minutes of searching, he went back to the girl. "Do you think you could help me out?" he asked innocently.

She had her head in her hands, muttering something about 'ingrates' under her breath. She peeked through her fingers at the small fictive before her. Taking a deep breath she slumped back in her chair and managed a weak smile. "Sure kiddo. What do you need?"

Bart took a deep breath, then said, "I'm-trying-to-find-Kon, 'cause-Noel-never-lets-him-stay-after-she-works-on-a-fic, 'cause-she-says-you'll-miss-him, and-I-think-you're-hogging-him, but-I-can't-find-him-so-can-you-help-me-out?" He looked at her with wide innocent eyes. "Please?"

Reccea's eye twitched, which happened when she had to decipher Speedspeak. (Her explanation for her lack of Bart and Wally fictives.) "Noel said what?" She sighed and grumbled under her breath, "Little liar." Then she stood up, pushing the wooden chair out. "All right let's hunt for Kon. And let's hope to God that he isn't in my room."

So Reccea carefully picked up Bart, lest he be stepped on and they headed into the next room. When the coast was clear, Roy who had dragged Dick under the bed, dragged him back to the computer. He looked at the computer. He looked at Dick.

"Don't Roy," Dick said figuring his intent.

Roy ignored him and started to climb the chair to reach the keyboard. Dick was torn. He wasn't happy with the current Guinness situation either, but should he tattle and tell Reccea or follow Roy up? He sighed.

Since leaving Roy alone was a colossally bad idea, he scrambled up the chair quickly after his man. Roy was cracking his knuckles and reading from Word. "Well?" Dick asked, as he heaved himself onto the desk. Dusting himself off, he wandered over and sat down on the Star Wars mouse pad and waited for Roy to decide what to do.

Roy pushed a couple of the keys down, with a strategically placed foot. "We're going to get our screen time. And our nookie."

In the other room, Bart sat on Reccea's shoulder, impatiently tapping his foot. They hadn't even been looking that long and he was already bored. Reccea sighed. "So why didn't Noel just ask Kon to visit you over at her place?" she asked, upset at the turn of events her evil co-writer had started. "Or better yet, why doesn't she get her own Kon."

Bart frowned. "But I like your Kon."

"Just my luck," Reccea muttered. "Just my luck."

She made her way through the large living room, hunting for signs of her Super!Fictive. "I know all about your 'liking' my Kon. He talks about you all the time." She peeked through the rows of books on her bookshelf, to no avail. She got on her knees, looking under the couch and coffee table. Still no Kon. This was starting to get serious.

"He does?" Bart smiled. "Kewl. This is getting confusing for me you know. Did you check behind the bookshelf?"

"Yes, I checked behind the bookshelf," Reccea stood moving her hair out of her face. "And what do you mean confusing?"

"Well confusing cause there's only one of me at Noel's place. But there's two Dicks and two Roys. I feel snubbed."

Reccea paused and considered the speedster fictive on her shoulder. "She only has one of you? I thought that..." Then Reccea smiled. "Oh my. You're her only Impulse. And you're in love with Superboy. That really must stress her out."

"No, she's fine with it, but it confuses me. Did you look behind the couch? Cause one minute she wants me to like Cissie, then Carol, then she wants me to kiss Kon. Roy said she's trying to turn me into a player. And why haven't you found him yet?" Bart climbed from Reccea's shoulder to the top of her head so he could get a better view.

"I don't know," Reccea grimaced. "I think he might have snuck into my room. He likes my stereo system." She headed down the hallway. "But if he's in there we may never find him. So, who do you like better? Cissie, Carol, or my little Kon?"

"Don't worry," Bart assured her deliberately ignoring the last question. "I've got a plan! Just thought of it too, Max'll be proud. So what's your room like? Is it messy-organized or messy-messy?"

"That's not how you spell 'enthralled'." Dick pointed out from atop the mouse pad.

Roy looked at the screen. "You're right." He jumped on the backspace key then raced over to the 'a' key the back to the 'l' key. He looked at Dick, "You know this would go faster if you took half the keys."

Dick shook his head. He was not going to get involved. He wasn't.

Roy pouted, looking completely sensitive and adorable.

Dick folded his arms, unimpressed. "I'm not helping. Reccea will just get pissed and write another poem about me and traumatize things. I've learned my lesson, thank you very much."

Roy pouted more severely. "I thought she only did that to her Gen Dick."

"Depends on her mood. She thinks we're interchangeable." He looked away from Roy, trying not to be moved by the pout. "Besides, I think she hates me."

Roy stopped typing. He walked over to where Dick was moping. He hugged him, then broke away. "Why would you think something like that?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Dick..." Roy started. "Come on, man, talk to me."

"She won't write from my point of view." Dick stood up, kicking the mouse. "She complains about me to Noel all the time. And... well there is the sex thing."

Roy squeezed his boyfriend's shoulder. "She's a wimp. That's why we haven't had sex."

Dick tilted his head, thinking about it. "She is, isn't she?"

"Yep," Roy nodded. "She cops out on every sex scene she comes near. Even in the slash she hasn't finished. Where the sex is important. Or y'know, the fade out sucks."

Dick nodded. Roy was for once right and as usual completely accurate. They should fix the sex problem. Maybe that would wake Reccea up. Dick shook his head, trying to stop that train of thought. He wasn't supposed to encourage Roy to do bad stuff. He was the mature one. The leader.

The fictive that *wasn't* getting sex.

Reccea would just have to deal, he decided.

Roy watched amazed as Dick walked up to the keyboard. He blinked trying to make sure this was happening. Then Roy grinned. "Okay man, you take right, I'll take left and we'll light up the screen."

Reccea opened her bedroom door and winced. Laundry, notebooks, comics, videos, and other things littered her floor. Impulse was gaping. "Okay now don't go running off. This is not some giant playground. This is dangerous territory." The radio was playing hard rock loudly, and her TV and extra computer were on. The TV had the history channel on, and her computer had solitaire. Reccea's Kon fictive, apparently had ADD. Almost as bad as Bart's. Bart smiled. "It looks like my room." He resisted the temptation to dash off. Reccea probably knew where everything was despite the mess, sides he didn't want to run into any weird food or plot bunnies. Besides, he had his plan. If she couldn't find Kon, he'd set the plan into motion. Bart looked at the room. Music, that wasn't that bad. Solitaire, okay that had it's merits, but where were all the fun computer games, but what, what was up with the History channel!? "Where do you want to start looking," he asked turning 360 degrees atop Reccea's head, causing her hair to spin.

Reccea took a deep breath. "Okay, there's the mounds of laundry over behind the bed. He and Iceman have been building a fort under there. He also likes the closet. Though I'm not sure I can even get that open. But you could probably crawl through the small crack between the doors. Uhh..."

Bart looked down at Reccea with a strange expression on his face, despite the fact she couldn’t see it. Crawl through a crack in the door? Crawling was not part of his plan. Not hardly. Didn't this girl know anything about him and why hadn't Kon educated her? "You want me to crawl?" he said disdainfully.

The tone was not lost on Reccea as she opened her mouth to respond. "Well it's not *that* dusty," she muttered, "but fine. You're the one who wanted Kon anyways. I was content to let him roam around on his own. But whatever."

She eased her way into the room, walking along the small clear path in the carpet. She found her various remotes and clicked off the TV, cable box, and stereo. "KON!!!!!"

Bart gaped at her. He sped down to her shoulder, and tugged her hair to get her attention. It was one thing to forget he could vibrate through all her junk, it was quite another to steal his idea.

"I was going to do that. Actually, I have a plan." He climbed up her hair so he could whisper into her ear. It was a careful plan molded from many, many wise comic books. It never failed.

Whenever someone was falling, and screamed for help, the hero would always appear out of nowhere. It couldn't go wrong, it was infallible. And that's exactly what Bart told her.

"You want to do what?" Reccea exclaimed. Bart waited patiently for her to see the brilliance in his plan. "Are you out of your mind?" Reccea asked, in a high pitched, loud voice, which was hardly the reaction Impulse was expecting. "What if Kon didn't catch you? And you went *splat* on my floor? Noel would kill me! I'd be dead! You're her only Bart fictive!"

Reccea ranted on and Impulse sighed. Grown-ups. So he did the logical thing and went with his plan. He jumped. And halfway down he even remembered to yell for help. He was kind of afraid though because Reccea's shriek was drowning his own, far more important cry.

Why the heck was she yelling anyways? He was the one falling not her. Bart ran a hand through his hair. It wasn't like he couldn't save himself, sheesh, what kind of superhero did she think he was? He looked around for Kon.

He had to be here somewhere.

Didn't he?

"Help?" he tried again. The ground was getting awfully close, awfully quick. And he couldn't see Kon anywhere. Which wasn't in the plan. And the plan was good. Nearly foolproof. So where was Kon?

That was it. When Bart finally found Kon, he was going to address the issue of Kon not being there when he had a plan. It was awfully rude of Kon to be part of Bart's plan then not show up, not that it made a difference that Bart hadn't decided to tell Kon in the first place. How dare Kon not know what Bart was thinking? Bart got ready to make an air cushion under him so he could slow his own descent to the ground.

From underneath the pile of clothes, Superboy walked out. He yawned and moved his sunglasses away to rub his eyes as he stepped into the light. "Hey, who turned off my music?" he asked peeved. Getting no answer, he opened his eyes. "Bart?!?"

Reccea's Superboy fictive gaped at the rapid descent of his favorite speedster. What on earth...? Scratch that. He didn't want to know. He jumped into the air and soared as quickly as he could in Bart's direction. He waited two seconds and...

SLAM!

Bart latched onto Superboy, his momentum hurling the young clone fictive into the ground. The dust cleared and Kon coughed weakly. Bart lay atop his friend, their legs tangled together. Bart lifted his head, his mop of brown hair falling in front of his eyes.

"Took you long enough!" Bart said as he tried to disentangle himself.

Kon looked at Reccea. He had so come into the middle of this.

Reccea looked back at Kon. "He came to visit and decided to kill himself. Excuse me while I go call Noel." She weaved her way out of the room, then stopped at the doorway. Looking back at them, she ordered, "Don't do anything that you're not of age for. Okay?"

Kon rolled his eyes. Satisfied, Reccea left. Kon waited while Impulse pulled himself up. "So," he sat up, "why did you try and commit suicide off of Recce's shoulder?"

Bart crinkled his nose slightly and brushed the tiny pieces of lint off himself. "It wasn't her shoulder, it was her hair," he clarified. "Besides, I wanted to see you." He smiled, trying to look innocent.

"Uh huh," Kon deadpanned. He pushed his sunglasses down so he could look over the top of the rims. Sometimes his boy made no sense at all.

"I did." Impulse frowned, folding his arms against his chest. He looked cute, all indignant and pouty.

Kon smirked. "Miss me?"

Bart grinned.

In the next room, the Roy and Dick were also grinning. The two fictives had completed their masterpiece! Hot steamy triple X nookie! It was great. Then they heard Reccea's footsteps coming closer. They scrambled to close the document. Dick hopped on the "Alt" key while Roy pressed "F4". That brought up a dialogue box. Moving too fast for his own good Dick tripped on the "Tab" key while Roy jumped to the "Enter."

The file closed without saving. Roy looked at the computer dumbstruck. "Noooo!" he wailed. "I'm doomed to be celibate for the rest of my fictive life!"

"Good God," Reccea muttered. "I'll write your stupid nookie. Now get off my desk."

Roy whimpered. Dick looked innocent. Reccea arched an eyebrow unfazed. "I have important things to do. I promise nookie later."

Roy tapped his foot on Reccea's mouse. "What's more important than my nookie?"

"I have to call Noel. I have something to discuss with that girl."

Dick snickered. "Someone's in trouble," he proclaimed in a sing-song voice.

"You're damn right someone's in trouble," Reccea muttered, hunting around for her portable phone. "She sent over her Bart fictive without asking first. And he just tried to commit suicide in my bedroom!"

"Well you shouldn't have let him go into your room," Dick told her. "Fictives always try to kill you or themselves when they see that disaster area."

"Oh thank you very much Mr. Grayson," Reccea growled.

Noel was sitting peacefully at her desk. She had finished scribbling some thoughts down on various stories. Her fictives were asleep. Slash Gen and Slash Roy were curled up in the Easter Basket. Tim had commandeered her bed. Roy had slinked back to his hiding place unseen and Dick had his little blanket on the scanner. It'd been a strangely peaceful night.

She sat typing methodically as she HTML-ed some more documents. So engrossed in her copy and pasting she didn't realize the phone was ringing. She picked it up on the third ring. "Hello?"

"I'm going to have to kill you," the person on the line informed her. "Or seriously maim. I haven't decided yet."

Noel blinked. Reccea? That sounded like Reccea which meant she was probably calling about... "Uh oh."

"Oh yes, 'uh oh'. Noel!" Reccea sounded pissed. "You didn't even warn me!"

"But, but," she stammered. "It's only Bart. You knew this would happen, he'd want to meet Kon's mom and--"

"*Only* Bart." came the frosty reply.

"But... you like Bart," she tried weakly, knowing that Reccea was past the sanity point. "Right?"

"I like Bart just fine" Reccea replied. "What I do not like is when he decides to launch himself off of my hair and into the air in order to get Kon's attention!"

"Again?" Noel asked wearily. She pinched the bridge of her nose, already sensing a headache forming.

"What do you mean *again*?"

"Did Kon catch him this time or did Bart have to float down by himself?"

"You've got to be kidding me."

"Uh... that would be a no. What? Did you think they sat in front of my monitor patiently every time Kon visited?"

"No! I thought they made out on your couch!"

Noel's mouth dropped open. "You what? Do you think it's eternally Seven-Minutes-In-Heaven at my place or something? Sheesh!"

"Well I certainly didn't think you had a suicide hotline installed at your house!"

Noel started laughing at the absurdity of that statement.

"This isn't funny."

"Yes it is." Finally, Noel composed herself. "Look if Bart and Kon are giving you trouble, just send them over here."

"If I can find them in my room," Reccea grumbled. "I can't believe you didn't tell me that Impulse acted out the damsel in distress act. That's just so funny."

"Shush," Noel commanded. "He doesn't know that only females in comics do it. I haven't had the heart to tell him."

"He doesn't know?" Noel could feel Reccea's skepticism. "I mean, if I were Kon -and he is my fictive- I would've told him. Probably even the first time he jumped. Just to see the look on his face."

"But..." Noel started but cut herself off when she heard a loud crash on the other end of the line. "Recce?" she questioned, wondering if the connection was still open.

"Oh my God." Reccea was still there. Just possibly in a state of shock. "I think they killed my cat."

"Who?" Noel asked knowing Reccea was probably up to investigate. "You're talking about your boys, not mine?" she asked hopeful. "Right?"

"Your boys, my boys....is that the bat??!?!?"

"Don't let Bruce grab Bart by the hair, wouldja? He hates that."

"Oh like *that's* the worst of my problems! Hang on," Reccea said.

Noel pressed the phone closer to her ear trying to distinguish sounds. There was a painful screech that only a kitty-cat could make. A few muttered words. "-- don't behave--" "--not listening--" "--two seconds--". Noel did not want to be there.

And then the ominous "OW! Get off my head NOW!"

Noel wondered if Reccea would buy the fact that she had "mysteriously" been disconnected. There was more of a ruckus, one "Holy-" and then silence.

Followed by a familiar voice "Is she okay?"

Noel called into the phone, just a tad bit over concerned but less than hysterical. "Bart! Get your butt on the phone!"

"Eh?"

"What happened?"

There was the rustling of the phone being handed over. "Uh hey, Noel. How are ya?" Roy asked in that casual flirty way of his.

Noel was not in the mood for Roy's b.s. "Don't get cute with me. What did you do Harper?"

"Me? It wasn't me." There was a pause while Noel waited -less than patiently- for the real answer. "It was Dick."

"Riiiiight," she drawled. "Want to tell me another one?"

"Gee, thanks." Roy replied snappishly. "It's not always me, y'know. I'm not the only one in this house with a penchant for trouble."

"Maybe not, but you've got the rep Roy. Accept it."

"Fine. Whatever." Roy replied. "Look, there was this thing. With the cat."

"Forget the cat, Roy! Is Reccea okay?"

"I'm sure she'll be fine. Eventually."

"Eventually?" Noel repeated. "Put Kon or Dick or Bruce on the phone!"

"All right! sheesh." There was more rustling and the sounds of a cat growling nearby.

"Yo."

"What happened to Recce and why do I still hear that damned cat?" Noel demanded from the new fictive.

"You don't want to know."

"Arrrgh! Yes I do! You're lucky plot holes aren't big enough for writers. Unless you want me to wake up my Batman you better tell me in the next two seconds!"

"Well there was the cat!" Kon objected quickly.

"Kid! Two seconds or I send Batman after you!"

"And it got into a little fight. With Bart."

Noel shook her head. Oh no. That was the last time Reccea would ever want to hear about Bart. "And Reccea?"

"Tried to save Bart."

"Is she conscious?"

"Well she ran to the bathroom clutching her hand."

"She'll live," a newer deeper voice cut into the phone. Noel listened patiently while Batman explained the situation. "Kon and Bart were coming to find a plot hole so Bart could go home, when the cat spotted them. It was going to pounce, but Reccea saw what was happening. Before she could do anything, Impulse ran around the cat confusing it. Kon flew him into the air and the cat leapt up at them. They vibrated through Reccea's hair unharmed, but the cat... sort of tackled her."

"Oh dear."

"And you should see the size of her cat!" Kon shouted.

Noel sighed. "I'm going to get blamed for this somehow, aren't I?"

"Give me the phone." Reccea ordered, loud enough for Noel to actually hear her. "Noel?"

"Hi, Recce," she offered weakly. "How's the... uh... hand?"

"Yeah, um, so don't want to talk about that." Noel thought she heard sniffling on the other end. "Can Kon spend the night at your house?"

"Yeah, that's fine hon. Are you okay?"

"My hand hurts." There was another sniffle and the distinct sound of a withheld sob.

Noel heard Roy in the background. "Great! Look at that! Now, she'll never get to write nookie!"

"Would you give it a rest?" Dick retorted. There was a sound of someone being hit, mostly likely Roy.

On the west coast, Recce sniffled again, following that with a heaving sigh. "I bled a lot. I hate it when that happens." She was sounding a little weepy.

With Kon floating/flying him up, Bart grabbed the edge of the desk and looked over just enough so his eyes could peek over. He frowned, his eyes wide and concerned.

"Recce, honey," Kon grimaced, "you need to do something about that cat."

That was a hiccup/sob and sniffle in response.

Bart jumped onto the desk. He walked sheepishly until he could reach Recce's hair. He tugged on it gently. A look of utter trepidation covered his face. "I'm sorry," he offered weekly.

"It's okay," Reccea looked down at the small, reckless fictive. She smiled weakly at him and took the kleenex that Roy handed her and blew her nose loudly into it.

Roy started to shoo the other gawking fictives away. "Nothing to see here. Mind your own business. Keep moving." He turned back to a still meepy Reccea. "You relax hon, Dick and I'll hold down the fort." With an annoyed gaze Roy turned his attention to Kon and Bart.

"We're going, we're going," Kon assured him.

A plot hole opened and Kon, holding Bart, flew into it. Dick cleared the other fictives out and Roy pet his writer's hair.

"Don't worry girl," Roy said stroking Recce's locks. "I'll make sure those YJ kids don't slum around here no more. Can't even handle a cat and they call themselves superheroes. Hey, now. Don't cry. Cheer up. Um... I've got ice cream! Yes, with sprinkles and Guinness. Not Guinness sprinkles, but y'know. And... fine, I won't make you write nookie."

Recce smiled.

But Noel, Noel wasn't smiling. The plot hole had appeared without incident and she was now able to write again. However, instead of writing Noel was giggling. Which happened often, when faced with writing slash, but she was a good writer and regularly bowed to her fictive's whims (unlike Reccea). And Bart and Kon...wanted possible flirting.

Granted, they weren't demanding fictives.

And easily distracted, if need be.

Still, they were only kids. They didn't really know what slash was really about. They didn't know about the stuff on the lists, hiding in the dark corners that no one talked about. They didn't know about ratings higher than PG. Hell, they were content with light petting. And if Noel had her way, even that probably wouldn't ever be written.

So the excitement had died down and everyone was getting back into some semblance of order. Whilst everyone was distracted, Batman took the opportunity to contact... well... Batman via IM.

So as Noel giggled, Reccea smiled, Bart and Kon flirted, and Dick and Roy took care of their writer, Batman grumbled. And disapproved. And other things that Batman could only do really well with Batman.

But Batman was okay with that. After all, Batman had a plan. He always did. And of course, two Batmans (Batmen?) are better than one.

Reccea's Bats hopped along the keyboard. "Phase One Complete." he reported. He stole a look at the Guinness boys. "Initiate Phase Two?"

Noel's Batman looked at the happy Young Justice couple. "Not yet." he signaled back. "All in due time."