By Gen X
Bilbo Baggins woke up gay and wondered if he could still get up at 111 years old.
The Sackville-Bagginses woke up gay and blamed that fool Bilbo.
Frodo Baggins woke up gay and wondered if there was anything else that could be done to him.
Samwise Gamgee woke up gay but couldn't think of any advice that his Gaffer had given.
Gandalf the Gray woke up gay and changed his name to Gandalf the Purple.
Meriadoc Brandybuck woke up gay and wondered if this would make him different from Pippin.
Peregrin Took woke up gay and sadly regretted that he was related to Frodo.
Tom Bombadil woke up gay and sang falsetto.
Aragorn woke up gay and went on a very long trip to avoid Arwen's wrath.
Elrond woke up gay and blamed his human blood.
Arwen woke up gay and traveled to Lothlorien to greet the Lady of the Woods.
Gimli woke up gay and decided to show Legolas why Dwarves were good miners.
Galadriel woke up gay but she had already forseen it.
Boromir woke up gay and realized if he blew the Horn of Gondor, men would come.
Gollum woke up gay and wondered if his precious would mind.
Eowyn woke up gay and wondered if it would affect the prophecy.
Saruman woke up gay and wondered if everyone thought he was compensating for something seeing as the tower of Isengard was so high.
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