SCREAM 2 SCRIPT
Here it is, the full Scream 2
Script. Please understand there may be a few errors, please excuse them. It all starts at the Realto Movie Theatre
MAUREEN
I hate scary movies. I should be studying, I got a bio due, you know
that?
PHIL
Did I mention that these tickets are free? Free.
MAUREEN
Sandra Bullock is playing right down the street.
PHIL
Now why do you wanna pay 7.50 to see some Sandra Bullock, unless she's
naked.
MAUREEN
Oh, but you will sit through some movie called STAB.
PHIL
It's an adrenaline rush Maureen, that's what it is.
MAUREEN
No, I'll tell you what is. It's a dumb ass white movie about some dumb
ass white girls getting their white asses cut the fuck up.
PHIL
Is that what it is?
MAUREEN
No, I'm just saying that the horror genre is historical for excluding
the African American element.
PHIL
Now where do you get your P.H.D. in black cinema sister soldier?
MAUREEN
Listen, I read my Entertainment Weekly, I know my shit.
PHIL
Yeah Maureen, I read my Blackbeat too. Black eyes. Black peeps.
THEATRE USHER
Hi, here you go.
MAUREEN
What's this?
THEATRE USHER
Stab souveneirs, the studio sent them.
MAUREEN
And it's white! Thank you.
STAB Movie begins as PHIL and MAUREEN make their way to their seats
while the song "Red Right Hand" plays in the background as the movie
begins. A young girl with blonde hair named Casey walks into the
bathroom during a thunderstorm as she gets ready to take a shower.
MAN IN THEATRE
Take it off!!
MAUREEN flims her hand in disgust and annoyance
MAUREEN
Now why does she gotta be naked? What does that have to do with the
plot, her being butt ass naked?
PHIL
I don't know about the plot, but I got a stiffie.
MAUREEN
You better loosen up that wrist.
Back to STAB, a phone rings as Casey looks back and dresses back up to
answer the phone. The men in the theatre grumble in disappointment.
CASEY IN "STAB"
Hello?
VOICE IN STAB
Hello.
CASEY IN "STAB"
Who is this?
VOICE IN "STAB"
You tell me.
CASEY IN "STAB"
No, really who is this?
MAUREEN
Bitch hang up the phone up and Star 69 his ass! Damn!
VOICE IN "STAB"
Look out back, see your boyfriend anywhere around?
CASEY IN "STAB"
I don't even have a boyfriend right now.
VOICE IN "STAB"
Would you like one? Hello? Cat got your tongue?
MAUREEEN
Damn, give me some money, I'm gonna get some popcorn.
PHIL
You got money.
MAUREEN
I know I got money, I asked for your money.
PHIL
Cheapskade.
MAUREEN
Thank you
CASEY IN "STAB"
I don't even know you, and I despise you already.
MAUREEN EXITS THEATRE WHERE A SCREAM IN THE THEATRE MAKES HER JUMP.
GIRL
Hey, come on!
GIRL 2
I know, I was so scared!
THEATRE USHER
Hey, we're sold out.
THEATRE USHER 2
Oh cool.
CONCESSION WORKER
Hello.
MAUREEN
Hi, I'll have a medium popcorn, no butter, and a small diet pepsi.
CONCESSION WORKER
You got it.
MAUREEN
Thanks.
GIRL
That's it, I'm not going back in there.
GIRL 2
Come on you chicken shit, it's just a movie.
GIRL
No, it's not just a movie, it's a true story. All of these kids got
killed a couple of years ago in California.
MAUREEN TAKES HER FOOD AND HEADS BACK TO THE THEATRE.
MAN
Ahhh!!!
MAN 2
Stab you man! Ahhhh!!
MAUREEN OPENS THE THEATRE DOOR AS A GHOST-MASKED FIGURE JUMPS OUT FROM
BEHIND HER.
PHIL
Ahhhhhh!!!
MAUREEN
Ahhhhhh!!!!
MAUREEN
You ass!!
PHIL
Sorry baby.
MAUREEN
Why are you playing?
PHIL
What's wrong? Why are you so tense?
MAUREEN
I don't like being scared.
PHIL
Ok, besides, scary movies are great for foreplay.
MAUREEN
Will you stop!
PHIL
Come on, let's go catch the Sandra Bullock movie.
MAUREEN
No, Sandra started already, we can stay. Alright, well just don't play
so much.
PHIL
Gotta go to the bathroom.
MAUREEN
Ok.
PHIL
See ya inside.
MAUREEN walks back into the theate where onscreen in STAB, a chair comes
crashing through a window as Casey runs for her life. While, Maureen
sits down and puts her jacket on, Phil enters the restroom.
He stands patiently as two men dressed in Ghostface costumes are using
the urinals. Phil decides to use one of the stalls. He bangs on the
first one to realize it's occupied.
PHIL
Sorry.
Phil sees that the second stall is unoccupied and decides to use it.
Suddenly, Phil hears a strange noise coming from the first stall and
decides to listen in as he laughs since it seems to be a couple in the
stall.
VOICE FROM STALL
No, I didn't mean to, I swear. Oh mommy, mommy! Oh Oh!!
Phil places his ear up to the bathroom stall wall.
VOICE FROM STALL
Listen mommy! Listen mommy! Listen mommy!
Suddenly, a thrust of a knife from the killer in the next stall, goes
throught the wall, stabbing Phil severly in the head as blood comes from
his mouth and Phil falls to the floor, dead. The killer exits the stall
quietly as Phil lies dead in a pool of blood.
Meanwhile, back onscreen, Casey jumps over a wall as she ducks in the
back.
MAUREEN
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!! Don't do that!
MAUREEN
Move, go go!
The killer dressed in Phil's jacket seats himself next to Maureen.
MAUREEN
Baby, give it up!
MAUREEN
You're back in time. It looks like she's gonna get it. Want some
popcorn?
The killer nods no.
MAUREEN
Now, see if that was me, I'd be out of there!
Onscreen in STAB, the killer jumps out of a window onto Casey as she
gets up and runs as fast she can, as the killer grabs her from behind.
MAUREEN
Here it comes! Here it comes!
MAUREEN hides her face into "Phil" as onscreen, the killer stabs Casey
in the chest as Casey falls screaming.
MAUREEN looks up at the screen and looks at her hand, and realizes it's
full of blood as she looks at "Phil" in wonder. Suddenly, the killer
pulls out the knife as MAUREEN looks in terror.
MAUREEN
Ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!
The killer stabs Maureen in the stomach as she gets up and walks to the
aisle. Back onscreen, the killer is stabbing Casey repeatedly. As
Maureen walks in the aisle, the killer comes behind her and begins
stabbing her six more times as Maureen walks up to the screen.k
The audience cheers in delight, thinking Maureen is part of a publicity
stunt for STAB. Maureen flails her arms in the arm and looks around, as
the theatre begins to realize it's real. Maureen flails back and then
falls dead.
TITLE TO SCREAM 2
INT. SIDNEY AND HALLIE'S DORM ROOM
a phone begins to ring. A girl laying in her bed, awakens to the phone
call as she grabs the phone.
SIDNEY
Hello?
SIDNEY
Hello?
VOICE
Hello Sidney. What's your favorite scary movie?
SIDNEY
Who is this?
VOICE
You tell me.
Sidney grabs for her caller ID.
SIDNEY
Cory Gillis. 555-0176.
CORY
Shit!
SIDNEY
Hot flash Cory, prank calls are criminal offense prosecuted under penal
code 653M.
CORY
Shit!
CLICK! The phone goes dead.
SIDNEY
Hope you enjoyed the movie.
HALLIE
Time to change numbers again?
SIDNEY
Nah, it'll die off, it's opening weekend.
HALLIE grabs the remote as she turns the TV on as SIDNEY is looking at
the mirror.
COTTON ON TV
Well, you can never tell...
Sidney turns to the familiar voice.
TALK SHOW HOST
You were fully exhonorated, you were an innocent man, and thanks to Gale
Weathers book.
COTTON ON TV
Yeah, but a nickel won't get you a coffee in prison anymore.
THE AUDIENCE ON TV LAUGHS.
COTTON
Yeah, but Gale's been great.
HALLIE
Get your ass in gear, you're late! Don't forget about the Acid Rain
Mixer tonight at Delta Lambda's tonight.
SIDNEY
I don't think I can go, Hallie.
HALLIE
What?! Come on, you promised.
SIDNEY
Hallie, you know about me and organized religion.
HALLIE
It's a sorority.
SIDNEY
Worse!
HALLIE
Are you OK?
SIDNEY
I'm fine.
HALLIE
"I'm fine." Yeah, I see that remark is always strecthed tightly across
your face.
GIRL
Check out the news!
TV REPORTER
Last night at a sneak preview showing of the movie STAB. Authorities
won't release anything, except for that the two victims, Maureen Evans
and Phil Stevens were both Windsor seniors.
SIDNEY
Where's Randy?
HALLIE
He's got film theory this morning.
EXT. DORM HOUSE
Sidney heads out of the dorm house and is immediately mobbed by several
reporters.
REPORTER #1
Sidney, did you know the victims?
REPORTER #2
Do you feel frightened by the murders?
Sidney pushes through and heads off.
INT. FILM THEORY CLASSROOM
PROFESSOR
So, what you're saying is that killer's influence was based on the movie
itself.
CICI
That is so moral majority, you can't blame real life violence on
entertainment.
GUY
Wait a minute, yes you can!
GUY #2
Hello? The guy was wearing a Ghostmask, just like in the movie, it's
directly responsible.
CICI
No it's not! Movies are not responsible for our actions.
GIRL
I had biology with that girl. This is serious.
RANDY
Thank you, I agree with that.
MICKEY
Oh come on Randy, with all due respect, the killer obvious patterned
himself after two serial killers who were immortalized on film.
GUY #2
Thank you!
PROFESSOR
So, you're saying that someone is trying to make a real life sequel?
RANDY
STAB 2? Why would anyone want to do that? Sequels suck!
MICKEY
It is common fact, there have been many sequels that have succeeded
their original.
CICI
Name one.
GUY
Aliens, far better than the first.
CICI
Yeah, well there's no accounting for taste.
RANDY
Thank you, "Ridley Scott" rules. Name another.
GUY #2
No, Aliens is a classic. "Get away from her, you bitch!"
RANDY
I believe the line is, "Stay away from her, you bitch." This is film
class right?
MICKEY
T2.
CICI
You've got a hard on for Cameron.
RANDY
Yeah, a big one.
GUY
The first Terminator is a classic.
RANDY
"Sarah Connor?" "Yes?" BOOM!
The class laughs.
GUY #2
House 2: The Second Story.
CICI
What?
RANDY
The horror genre was destroyed by sequels.
MICKEY
No, wait, I got it. The Godfather: Part 2.
Class agrees while Randy does a Marlon Brando impression that makes the
class laugh. Suddenly, Sidney shows up and her presence is immediately
known to Randy.
PROFESSOR
We'll continue the sequel discussion tomorrow.
GIRL
So, Mr. Originality, what would you make different?
RANDY
I'd let the geek get the girl.
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS
SIDNEY
300 people watched, no one did anything. They all though it was a
publicity stunt.
RANDY
So?
SIDNEY
It's starting again Randy.
RANDY
No, a lot happens in movie theaters these days. People get mamed,
murdered, robbed, shot. Multiplexs are a very dangerous place to be
these days.
SIDNEY
Yeah, and you are in extreme denial.
RANDY
And you should be too, this has nothing to do with us.
SIDNEY
Randy, a guy in a Ghostmask hacked up two people in a movie theater
telling our life story.
RANDY
Coincidence?
SIDNEY
You know what happened in Woodsboro. You can't deny it.
In the backround DEREK approaches.
RANDY
Yes Sidney, and I don't wanna go back there. Can't we go back to our
pseudo quasi happy existence, hello Derek.
DEREK
Hey, I heard what happened, you weren't in class.
SIDNEY
Yeah, I skipped, I couldn't take all of the "that's her" looks.
DEREK
Is there anything I can do?
SIDNEY
Do you have a way back to a pseudo quasi happy existence.
DEREK
You know what, I think I might.
SIDNEY
That was pretty good.
RANDY
Get a room.
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS
GALE
They're what? Are you kidding, they'd be stupid to pull this movie.
It'll break box office records. No, it's a done deal.
JOEL
Miss Weathers? Hi, I'm Joel, you're new cameraman.
GALE
Do you have experience?
JOEL
Uh yeah, I shot the bingo finals, heck, I won an award for that.
GALE
Great. Ok Joel, this is how it works. I point, you shoot. You stay
focused and fast and on your toes, and we'll get along fine. Think you
can handle that?
JOEL
Uh yeah.
DEBBIE
Excuse me Miss Weathers, could I have a word with you?
GALE
No.
DEBBIE
Please, it'll just take a second. I just want to say that I am a big fan
of your work. I read your book, and I couldn't put it down, it was that
great.
GALE
Why thank you.
DEBBIE
I'm a writer myself, well, just for the local paper, The Post Telegraph.
I'm Debbie Salt. I took your seminar last year in Chicago. I was the one
in the front asking all of the questions.
GALE
Right, I thought you looked familiar.
DEBBIE
Yeah, well I can't wait to see the movie. You must be getting alot of
flack about that. Right?
GALE
No comment.
DEBBIE
Please Miss Weathers, it would be such an honor if I could get a quote
from you for my story.
GALE
Alright. Begin quote.
DEBBIE
Great.
GALE
Your flattering remarks are both desperate and obvious. End quote.
REPORTER
Gale, do you feel the murders are related to Sidney Prescott?
CHIEF HARTLEY (at podium)
Could I have your attention. My name is Chief Louis Hartley.
GALE
Chief Hartley. Hi, Gale Weathers, author of "The Woodsboro Murders."
Do you think that the killer will strike again?
CHIEF HARTLEY
We have no evidence that this is a serial killer. I'd like to see
that...
GALE
Are you taking any precautions?
RANDY
Oh man, this is huge.
RANDY
Sidney, look, it's Gale Weathers.
SIDNEY
What?
RANDY
Star of the Gale Weathers press conference. Author of the press
conference starring Gale Weathers. Soon to be a major motion picture
starring Gale Weathers.
SIDNEY
Be kind, she saved our lives.
RANDY
Check the calf implants. I'm gonna get closer.
Several sorority girls, including LOIS and MURPHY approach the group.
LOIS
Hello girls.
HALLIE
Oh, hello sister Lois, sister Murphy.
MURPHY
Hello pledge. Hi Sidney!
SIDNEY
Hey.
MURPHY
This must be hell for you.
SIDNEY
I manage.
MURPHY
To think that this fest is all about you. Not directly, but in some six
degrees of Kevin Bacon way.
LOIS
So Sidney, are you coming to our little martini mixer tonight?
SIDNEY
I don't know, I think..
HALLIE
We'll be there.
LOIS
Oh good, cause Sid, we have our eyes on you. The Delta Lambdas are very
sensitive to your plight and if you need anything just call. Bye!
DELTA LAMBDA GIRL
Bye.
DEREK
Are you gonna start to dress like that once you get in?
SIDNEY
That's not gonna happen.
MICKEY
The Delta Lambdas are the biggest bunch of fucking..
HALLIE
Hey! I'm pledging Delta Lambda.
SIDNEY
Oh my god.
DEREK
Who's that?
Dewey wanders around, like he is looking for someone.
SIDNEY
Dewey?! Hey!
DEWEY
Oh man, I was worried about you. I heard what happened and I was on the
first flight. Can we talk?
SIDNEY
Yeah.
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS AT A TABLE ON A PORCH
SIDNEY
Things were going fine until now. But uh, theatre is going great. I got
my first starring role and we open in two days.
DEWEY
That is great!
SIDNEY
Yeah, and uh, I'm seeing someone. He's a nice guy, no apparent psychotic
tendencies.
DEWEY
I was just worried. Look Sid, if there is some freaked out psycho trying
to follow in Billy Loomis' footsteps, you probably already know him, or
her, or them. They're probably already in your life.
SIDNEY
You don't think I know that Dewey? What am I supposed to do, crawl under
a rock?
DEWEY
No, I'm gonna talk to Chief Hartley and the local police. I'm gonna make
sure that you're safe. I'm just gonna hang around if that's ok?
SIDNEY
Yeah, I'd be honored.
DEWEY
Alright.
DEREK
Hey, are you alright? Who was that guy?
SIDNEY
An old friend.
RANDY
Deputy Dewey, Woodsboro's finest. What's he doing here?
SIDNEY
He's worried. Our surrogate big brother.
RANDY
Wow, Nothing like a funeral bringing the family together. I'm gonna go
say hi.
MICKEY
Chief Hartley said the girl was stabbed seven...
DEREK
Drop it!
GALE
Hello Sidney.
SIDNEY
Hi...Gale.
GALE
Well, I was hoping I could get a few words from you with...
SIDNEY
Cotton.
COTTON
Hello Sidney.
GALE
Here we are at Windsor College where Sidney Prescott has just been
reunited with Cotton Weary for the first time since she wrongfully
accussed him of her murdering her mother.
SIDNEY
What the hell are you doing?
GALE
We want to know what you think..
COTTON
Sidney, I'd just like to say that I forgive and forget, and like you,
I'd like to move on with my life.
SIDNEY
You bitch! (she is about to puch out Gale)
GALE
Nah ahh ah!
GALE
Oh Sidney, share with us please!
BAM! Sidney slaps Gale across the face.
SIDNEY
I'll share with you!
HALLIE
Did you get that on film?
JOEL
Yes, I got that on film.
COTTON
Gale, what's going on? You mean, she didn't know?
JOEL
Oh man, that was cold.
GALE
Hey, you need to check your conscience at the door sweetie! We're not
here to be loved.
COTTON
Gale, you promised me 10 minutes of air time.
GALE
You'll get your ten minutes when I get my god damn interview!
COTTON
Gale, now I did my part. Don't walk away from me! Gale!
GALE
Joel!
Gale walks up the campus where she runs smack dab into Dewey.
GALE
Dewey? What are you doing here?
DEWEY
Can't you just leave her alone? Hasn't she been through enough?! And my
name is Dwight!
GALE
I was just doing my job, Dwight.
DEWEY
No matter who gets hurt in the process.
GALE
Hey! Who got punched here? Me!
DEWEY
Well, I'd say you deserved it. Page 32, "Deptuy Dewey filled the room
with his Barney Fifish presence."
GALE
I see that you read my book.
DEWEY
Well, Miss Weathers, I do read.
GALE
Come on Dewey, it's just a character in a book.
DEWEY
Page 41, "Deputy Dewey oozed with inexperience."
GALE
Don't you think you're overreacting just a little bit?
DEWEY
No, what I think is that your money hungry and fame seeking and forgive
me for saying, mediocre writing, has a cold storage where a heart should
be. No offense intended.
GALE
Dewey, I never meant to imply...
DEWEY
How do you know that my dimwitted inexperience isn't merely a subtle
form of manipulation used to lower people's expectations thereby
enhancing my ability to effectively maneuver within any given situation.
GALE
I don't what to say, except for that, I'm sorry.
DEWEY
No, I'm sorry, I misjudged you. Oh, one more thing, nice streaks.
GALE
Well!
INT. DELTA LAMBDA ZETA SORORITY HOUSE AT THE MARTINI MIXER
HALLIE
See, party life can be good. This is safe, and fun.
SIDNEY
Hallie, I think your psych major is getting to your head. I'm fine.
HALLIE
You know that's beginning to become your theme song. "I'm fine.
Yeah, neurotic, insecure, and fucked up.
LOIS
Sidney, you made it!
MURPHY
Hi!!!! No, I really mean that, hi!
SIDNEY
Hi.
LOIS
Do you girls want a drink?
HALLIE
Yeah, but you know what, we'll get it.
INT. OMEGA BETA ZETA SORORITY HOUSE
GIRL ON PHONE
I love those guys and I haven't seen it for 3 weeks.
CICI
No, they broke, Sarah found out that Bailey was sleeping with Gwen, she
dumped him two episodes ago. Hold on, I gotepisodes ago. Hold on, I got
ano
VOICE
Hello.
CICI
Ted? Where are you? Have you been drinking? Hold on. (She switches back
to the other line) Ted's on the other line, he sounds drunk, I'll call
you back.
GIRL ON PHONE
That shit only calls you when he's drunk, don't go over there Cici.
CICI
Ok. (Clicks back) Ok Ted, you sound loaded? What's up?
VOICE
Who's Ted?
CICI
Oh, I'm sorry my bad. I Thought you were someone else.
VOICE
That's alright...I am.
CICI
Who are you calling for? No one is here.
VOICE
Where is everyone?
CICI
We're co-sponsering the Acid Rain Mixer tonight for the Delta Lambdas.
VOICE
So, why aren't you there?
CICI
I'm sober sister, I need to be here in case a drunk sister calls and
needs a ride.
VOICE
That's too bad.
CICI
Drink with your brain, that's our motto. Who are you calling for?
VOICE
What if I said you?
CICI
What if I said goodbye?
VOICE
Why would you wanna do that?
CICI
Why do you always answer a question with a question?
VOICE
I'm inquisitive.
CICI
Yeah, and I'm impatient. Look, do you wanna leave a message for someone?
VOICE
Do you want to die tonight Cici?
Phone beeps and Cici clicks over to other call.
CICI
Omega Beta Zeta.
GIRL ON PHONE
So was it Teddy?
CICI
Now, it was some creep asshole trying to scare me!
GIRL ON PHONE
That movie STAB, it's bringing out the crazies.
Cici hears a thud upstairs.
CICI
Shit!
GIRL ON PHONE
What?
CICI
I heard a noise.
GIRL ON PHONE
Where?
CICI
Upstairs.
CICI looks upstairs as more thuds continue.
GIRL ON PHONE
Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill.
GIRL ON PHONE
Die, Die, Die, Die, Die, Die
CICI
Stop it!
GIRL ON PHONE
(Laughs)
I can't believe you're alone in that house.
CICI
I don't think I'm alone. I'm outta here.
CICI runs out the front door and stops.
GIRL ON PHONE
You're breaking up. Where are you?
CICI
Outside.
GIRL ON PHONE
Don't panic Cici, just call campus security.
CICI
Alright.
CICI dials the campus security.
MAN
Campus security.
CICI
Hi, yes.
MAN
Hello?
CICI walks inside to get better reception.
CICI
Can you hear me now?
Campus security hangs up.
CICI
Shit.
CICI dials campus security again.
MAN
Campus Security.
CICI
Hello, I'm calling from the Omega Beta..
MAN
Hello?
CICI walks more inside to get better reception.
CICI
Hello, I'm calling from the Omega Beta Zeta house, someone is harassing
me.
Security hangs up again, phone goes dead.
CICI
Shit!
A girl comes from behind!
DAWNIE
Hey!
CICI
Oh! Jesus Dawnie, you scared me!
DAWNIE
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, did anyone call for me?
CICI
What are you doing here?
DAWNIE
I live here, remember?
CICI
I thought you were going to the Acid Rain Mixer tonight?
DAWNIE
I am, I just had to change first.
PHONE RINGS.
DAWNIE
Omega Beta Zeta.
VOICE
Is Cici there?
DAWNIE
Yes, who's calling?
VOICE
It's Ted.
DAWNIE
It's your ill conceived boyfriend. Ok, I'm gonna go now and don't forget
to set the alarm. Bye!
CICI
Hello Ted.
VOICE
You wish it was Ted! Don't forget to set the alarm!
CICI drops the phone and immediately runs to set the alarm. She hears a
door close upstairs while a dog barks from outside. CICI walks through
the house slowly looking aronnd in fear. She grabs a door and flings it
open, with nobody behind it. Suddenly, the phone rings again. Cici
slowly picks it up.
CICI
Hello?
A door bursts open with the killer lunging at Cici with a knife to her
head as Cici ducks and runs up the stairs. She throws a potted plant on
his head as she runs up the stais, she gets to the attic and pushes a
bike in the killer's way, but he grabs Cici in time and pushes her
through the balcony glass where the alarm goes off. Cici lies flat on
the balcony as the killer takes his knife and stabs Cici twice in the
back, then the killer picks up Cici...
CICI
No!!! Please!!!!
The killer throws Cici off the balcony to the ground....
CICI
AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
A thump and Cici lies dead while the killer wipes off his bloody blade.
EXT. BACKYARD PATIO OF THE DELTA LAMBDA ZETA HOUSE
LOIS
You see, Sidney. Alot of people think that sororities are all about
giving blowjobs but it's not true.
MURPHY
No, we only promote safe, condom sex.
LOIS
It's really about family and tradition. Harmonica style is okay.
MURPHY
Oh, yeah.
RANDY
Here are your martini's.
SIDNEY
About time. Yeah, well, you guys have given me a lot to think about.
Thanks.
Sidney walks away to Derek, leaving Murphy and Lois totally clueless.
MICKEY
Hey babe, wanna dance?
HALLIE
Yeah, with that tall, broad shoulder one over there.
MICKEY
The Empire Strikes Back. Better story, improved effects.
RANDY
Not a sequel, part of a original planned trilogy.
HALLIE
Yeah, I like those little furry things.
MICKEY
The Ewoks, they blow.
DEREK
Hey, so are they being nice to you?
SIDNEY
Painfully nice.
DEREK
I figure you won't be joing with the Delta-Lambda-Zetas.
Sirens sound in the background.
LOIS
Hey guys, something is up at Omega Beta Zeta, police are everywhere!
MURPHY
Hurry!
All of the party guests begin to run out.
LOIS
I didn't mean to break up the party!
MURPHY
Shit, I should've brought my drink!
EXT. FRONT YARD OF OMEGA BETA ZETA HOUSE
DEBBIE
So, then it's obviously not suicide. Thank you. Gale, hi, it's not good,
it's a single victim, a sorority girl. Look, I gotta go, I got a
deadline.
GALE
Joel, let's go.
JOEL
In a minute.
GALE
It's happening again, is it?
DEWEY
You'd love that, wouldn't you? Better hurry Gale, you wouldn't want to
get scooped.
GALE
Move it Joel!
JOEL
Gale, I don't think I am cut out for this. I mean, I was brought here to
do an press conference coverage.
GALE
Do not fuck with me!
EXT. FRONT PORCH OF DELTA LAMBDA ZETA HOUSE
DEREK
Come on, get your jacket, let's get you home.
Sidney walks back in and grabs her jacket and puts it on when the phone
begins to ring. Sidney heads out the door to Derek, when she turns back,
wanting to answer the phone.
DEREK
You about ready?
SIDNEY
Almost.
Sidney picks up the phone.
SIDNEY
Hello?
VOICE
Hello Sidney, remember me?
SIDNEY
What do you want?
VOICE
I want you! It's showtime!
SIDNEY
Then why don't you show your face, you fucking coward!!
VOICE
My pleasure!
SIDNEY
Derek!
Sidney turns around to see the killer come after her as she pushes the
killer out of the way as Derek comes running to the door. The killer
lunges for Sidney but stabs through the door, nearly missing Derek.
Sidney runs through house, doding the killer, she runs out of the patio
door and runs smack dab into Derek.
DEREK
Are you ok?
SIDNEY
Yeah! yeah!!
Derek runs into the house.
SIDNEY
No Derek, don't!!
DEWEY
Sidney!
SIDNEY
Dewey! The killer's inside, Derek ran after him.
Glass breaks and you hear Derek yell, Dewey runs inside. Dewey bursts
the door open to find Derek on the floor with his arm badly.
DEREK
Oh god!
SIDNEY
Derek!
DEWEY
Where did he go?
DEREWK
That way!
DEWEY
Sidney, he's in here!
Dewey runs in the direction that Derek pointed to and see Lois and
Murphy standing outside, peering through the front door.
MURPHY
Is everything ok?
Dewey runs back to Derek.
DEWEY
Here, apply pressure to it.
DEREK
Ouch! Eww!!
Sidney stands in fear, mad that Derek has been hurt.
INT. HOSPITAL
OFFICER RICHARDS (walking with Mickey)
Thank you for your time. We'll be ready for you in a second Hallie.
HALLIE
Ok.
MICKEY
The men ask everything.
HALLIE
I'm gonna get some coffee, you wanna go with.
Mickey nods no.
HALLIE
You want some Sid?
Sidney nods no as Mickey sits down next to her.
MICKEY
How are you holding up, are you ok?
SIDNEY
Not at all. I knew that this coming, I knew that this wasn't over.
MICKEY
You are not alone.
SIDNEY
That poor girl.
MICKEY
Yeah, I know.
SIDNEY
You know, Derek could've been killed too.
MICKEY
But he wasn't, he needs to realize that the 90's are no time to play
hero. Why would anyone go back into that house?
INT. HOSPITAL EXAMINING ROOM
DEREK
So, that's when I ran back into and that's where I met up with the
killer. He cut my arm and then ran away.
DOCTOR
You're lucky there's no nerve damage, you'll have to take it easy for a
couple of days.
COP
He didn't struggle, nothing, I mean, you're lucky he didn't kill you.
DEWEY
Yeah, it's real convenient for everybody.
DEREK
Excuse me.
DEWEY
Nothing, it's just a shame that the killer got away so easy.
DEREK
It's just a shame you got there too late, right after he ran away.
DEWEY
Yeah, it is.
Later that day, at the Windsor College police station.
CHIEF HARTLEY
We've got three victims. Maureen Evans, Phil Stevens, and Cici Cooper.
GALE
Is Cici the girl's real name?
CHIEF HARTLEY
Uh, no, it's Casey, Casey Cooper.
GALE
As in Casey Becker?
CHIEF HARTLEY
Paron me?
GALE
She was a young victim at Woodsboro, as well as her boyfriend Steven
Orth.
DEWEY
As in Phil Stevens.
GALE
Maureen Evans, Maureen Prescott, that's Sidney's mother.
DEWEY
Looks like you got a copycat on your hands chief?
CHIEF HARTLEY
Jesus Christ.
DEWEY
What are you doing to protect Sidney?
CHIEF HARTLEY
Well, I've got my two best men watching her.
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS
DEREK
Do these guys have to follow you around everywhere?
SIDNEY
Oh, they're attached at the hip.
DEREK
How am I ever gonna get you alone?
SIDNEY
To be honest Derek, it's probably in your best interest if, stay far
away from me as possible.
DEREK
I hope that wasn't a cut remark that holds no subtext whatsoever.
SIDNEY
Derek, I'm being serious, this is serious. I mean, look at you, you
already got hurt, I don't wanna see that happen again.
DEREK
I hope you don't things from the past and not trusting me.
SIDNEY
Like I said, I don't wanna see you get hurt.
DEREK
And I don't wanna see you get hurt.
EXT. POLICE STATION
CHIEF HARTLEY
Good luck Miss Weathers.
GALE
Alright, thanks.
CHIEF HARTLEY
Dewey.
DEWEY
Chief.
GALE
So I am heading down to emissions to do some legwork, you game?
DEWEY
I'm not here to write a book Miss Weathers, I'm here to help Sid.
GALE
I wanna help her too, and help myself. Come on Dewey, smile for me once,
please!
DEWEY
I smile when I catch the killer.
DEBBIE
Gale, hi. So what's going on?
REPORTER
What about Sidney's father, has he been ruled out as a possible suspect?
DEBBIE
Well, he's currently out of the country on business, but doesn't that
seem a little fishy?
GALE
I'm not here to do your job Ms. Salt!
DEBBIE
And what about this ex-cop Dewey Riley? It seems a little strange that
he showed up.
REPORTER
Yeah, what's he doing here?
GALE
Look, Dewey's a good guy, unlike some of us.
DEBBIE
Well, if the killer is repeating Woodsboro, it may be that the killer is
from Woodsboro, that's all.
INT. COLLEGE DINING HALL
MICKEY
Hey guys, do you think Sid would so an interview for my documentary?
HALLIE
Yeah, after she turns down Dateline, 20/20, Primetime, but for you,
yeah!
MICKEY
Drop it! I was thinking of who the killer may be, have you guys gotten a
good look at Randy lately?
DEREK
What?
MICKEY
I know that he's an innocent first time through, but he's a little off.
You know?
HALLIE
Come on, Randy? The guy is harmless.
MICKEY
That's what they said about Dahmer.
DEREK
Drop it! What's up Sid?
SIDNEY
Hey.
MICKEY
How's it going? Where are the secret service guys?
SIDNEY
Uh, over there.
HALLIE
And which one is Kevin Costner?
SIDNEY
The one on the left is Officer Richards, he's a Gemini, divorced with
two kids. The one on the right is Officer Andrews, a Capricorn, single,
but I think he's gay.
HALLIE
Really?
SIDNEY
Mmmmmmmhmmmmm.
MICKEY
What's on your mind Derek?
DEREK
I woke up this morning with this feeling and so I (begins singing) just
decided to myself, I'd hide it to myself.
HALLIE
What is he doing?
MICKEY
Uh, Top Gun, Tom Cruise, 1986
DEREK
"When you walked into the room, I think I love you, I think I love you,
so what am I so afraid of, I'm afraid that I'm not sure of, a love there
is no cure for. I think I love you, isn't that what life is made of, so
it worries me to say, I've never felt this way."
Derek continues singing as the cafeteria is cheering while Sidney
laughs.
DEREK
I want you to have this.
Derek gives Sidney his frat letters.
MICKEY
Hey, isn't that a big frat no no?
HALLIE
Oh, that's a big no no, you see, you're not supposed to give your
letters to your girl, no shape, no form. The brothers are gonna kick his
ass, but it's tradition.
MICKEY
It's tradition.
DEREK
I wanted you to have this for protection.
Sidney then kisses Derek.
INT. BASKIN ROBINS
INTERVIEWER ON TV
So, tell us about this part you're getting rave reviews for.
TORI SPELLING
Well, I play this girl named Sidney Prescott who finds out that her
boyfriend is this psycho killer who also killed her mother the year
before.
INTERVIEWER
So, what kind of research did you do for this part?
TORI SPELLING
Well, I read the book....
RANDY
I cannot believe it they get Tori Spelling to play Sid, and they cast
Joe Blow nobody to play me. At least you get David Schwimmer. I get the
guy who drove the stagecoach for one episode of Dr. Quinn.
INTERVIEWER
This is Tori Spelling in the new movie: STAB.
SIDNEY IN STAB
Billy, what are you doing here?
BILLY IN STAB
They let me go Sid, I didn't do it.
SIDNEY IN STAB
No, please.
BILLY IN STAB
Why won't you let me touch you?
SIDNEY IN STAB
Look, I've gone through a lot lately, ever since my mom died.
BILLY IN STAB
Sid, look, I think you need to just deal with that, move on. I mean when
my mom left my dad, I accepted it, that's the way it is.
SIDNEY IN STAB
Yeah, your mom left town, she's not lying in a cemetary somewhere.
BILLY IN STAB
Stupid!
INTERVIEWER ON TV
Oooh! I love scary movies!
RANDY
I'll wait for video. Ok, let's get down to business, the way I see it,
someone is out to make a sequel, you know, cash in on all of the movie
murder hoopla, so it's our job to observe rules of a sequel. Number one,
the body count is always bigger, number 2, the death scenes are always
much more elaborate, more blood, more gore, carnage candy. Your core
audience just expects it. And number three, never...
DEWEY
How do we find the killer Randy, that's what I want to know!
RANDY
Well, let's look at the suspects. There's Derek, the obvious boyfriend,
hello Billy Loomis! His knife cut missed every major vein and artery and
he pitied on Sid.
DEWEY
So you think it's Derek!
RANDY
Not so fast, let's assume if the killer or ers has half a brain, he's
not a Nick at Nite rerun type of guy, he wants to break some new ground,
so forget the boyfriend thing, it's tired. Who else doguy, he w
DEWEY
There's...
RANDY
Mickey, the freaky Tarantino film student. But if he is a suspect, so am
I. So, let's move on.
DEWEY
Well, let's not move on. What if you are a suspect?
RANDY
Well, if I'm a suspect, you're a suspect!
DEWEY
You've got a point, ok, let's move on to...
RANDY
Hallie.
DEWEY
Sid's roommate?
RANDY
Uh huh.
DEWEY
Typically, serial killers are white male.
RANDY
That's why it's perfect! It's sort of against the rules but not really.
Mrs. Voorhies was a terrific serial killer, and there's always room for
Candyman's daughter. She's sweet, she's bad for your teeth.
DEWEY
Come on Randy, these kids are your friends. Who do you think is the
killer?
RANDY
How about Gale Weathers?
DEWEY
Gale?! A Killer?!
RANDY
Why not?
DEWEY
Well, she is vicious.
RANDY
She's an opportunist. Isn't it conceivable she's planning her next book?
That's what reporters do Dewey.
DEWEY
Nah, Gale's a lot of things, but Gale's no killer.
RANDY
Look, just cause you're sweet on her...
DEWEY
No, I'm not.
RANDY
Come on, this is me talking here, Randy, the unrequited love slave to
Sidney Prescott, I know all about obsession and pain.
DEWEY
And you got your love scar to prove it.
RANDY
And so do you, I mean, what's up with that limp cause you were stabbed
in the back.
DEWEY
Severed nerve. Look, Gale's no killer.
RANDY
Ok, alright then, but if she's not a killer, she's a target.
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS
GALE
Joel, let's get some establishing shots done.
JOEL
Gale, can I talk to you for a second?
GALE
What is it?!
JOEL
Look, grant it I should've read your book before I took this job, but
I'm reading it now, and wooooo!!! I read what happened to your last
cameraman, the guy got gutted. Now, if I would do what any other
rational human would do, which is, get the fuck out of here!
GALE
First of all, he wasn't gutted, I made that up, his throat was slashed.
JOEL
Look, gutted, slashed, the guy ain't in the union no more!
GALE
This is national television, this could be a big chance for you. The
story is monumental. Don't you want to be a part of that?
JOEL
Yeah, but I want to report the news, I don't want to be the news.
GALE
It's a job Joel, and like most jobs, it has its drawbacks. Come on,
you're a professional cameraman, you've got to stay focused. I am
counting on you, I cannot do this without you. Alright? Let's get some
work done.
JOEL
Yeah, let's go get killed!
INT. COLLEGE THEATRE
GUS
We've been through this before, you know what I think you're potential
is.
SIDNEY
I know, but with the book, the movie, and my life.
GUS
I do understand how difficult this is for you. But Sid, you can win,
you're a fighter.
SIDNEY
Yeah, right, I'm a fighter.
GUS
I don't believe you.
SIDNEY
I'm a fighter.
GUS
I don't believe you, I don't.
SIDNEY
I'm a fighter.
GUS
The battle for the soul is from within, Cassandra is one of the many
Greek tragic victims. You can do it Sidney.
Sidney looks at Gus with confidence.
GUS
GALE
I'm not here to do your job
REPORTER
Yeah, what's he doing here?
GALE
Look, Dewey's a good guy, unlike some of us.
DEBBIE
Well, if the killer is repeating Woodsboro, it may be that the killer is
from Woodsboro, that's all.
INT. COLLEGE DINING HALL
MICKEY
Hey guys, do you think Sid would so an interview for my documentary?
HALLIE
Yeah, after she turns down Dateline, 20/20, Primetime, but for you,
yeah!
MICKEY
Drop it! I was thinking of who the killer may be, have you guys gotten a
good look at Randy lately?
DEREK
What?
MICKEY
I know that he's an innocent first time through, but he's a little off.
You know?
HALLIE
Come on, Randy? The guy is harmless.
MICKEY
That's what they said about Dahmer.
DEREK
Drop it! What's up Sid?
SIDNEY
Hey.
MICKEY
How's it going? Where are the secret service guys?
SIDNEY
Uh, over there.
HALLIE
And which one is Kevin Costner?
SIDNEY
The one on the left is Officer Richards, he's a Gemini, divorced with
two kids. The one on the right is Officer Andrews, a Capricorn, single,
but I think he's gay.
HALLIE
Really?
SIDNEY
Mmmmmmmhmmmmm.
MICKEY
What's on your mind Derek?
DEREK
I woke up this morning with this feeling and so I (begins singing) just
decided to myself, I'd hide it to myself.
HALLIE
What is he doing?
MICKEY
Uh, Top Gun, Tom Cruise, 1986
DEREK
"When you walked into the room, I think I love you, I think I love you,
so what am I so afraid of, I'm afraid that I'm not sure of, a love there
is no cure for. I think I love you, isn't that what life is made of, so
it worries me to say, I've never felt this way."
Derek continues singing as the cafeteria is cheering while Sidney
laughs.
DEREK
I want you to have this.
Derek gives Sidney his frat letters.
MICKEY
Hey, isn't that a big frat no no?
HALLIE
Oh, that's a big no no, you see, you're not supposed to give your
letters to your girl, no shape, no form. The brothers are gonna kick his
ass, but it's tradition.
MICKEY
It's tradition.
DEREK
I wanted you to have this for protection.
Sidney then kisses Derek.
INT. BASKIN ROBINS
INTERVIEWER ON TV
So, tell us about this part you're getting rave reviews for.
TORI SPELLING
Well, I play this girl named Sidney Prescott who finds out that her
boyfriend is this psycho killer who also killed her mother the year
before.
INTERVIEWER
So, what kind of research did you do for this part?
TORI SPELLING
Well, I read the book....
RANDY
I cannot believe it they get Tori Spelling to play Sid, and they cast
Joe Blow nobody to play me. At least you get David Schwimmer. I get the
guy who drove the stagecoach for one episode of Dr. Quinn.
INTERVIEWER
This is Tori Spelling in the new movie: STAB.
SIDNEY IN STAB
Billy, what are you doing here?
BILLY IN STAB
They let me go Sid, I didn't do it.
SIDNEY IN STAB
No, please.
BILLY IN STAB
Why won't you let me touch you?
SIDNEY IN STAB
Look, I've gone through a lot lately, ever since my mom died.
BILLY IN STAB
Sid, look, I think you need to just deal with that, move on. I mean when
my mom left my dad, I accepted it, that's the way it is.
SIDNEY IN STAB
Yeah, your mom left town, she's not lying in a cemetary somewhere.
BILLY IN STAB
Stupid!
INTERVIEWER ON TV
Oooh! I love scary movies!
RANDY
I'll wait for video. Ok, let's get down to business, the way I see it,
someone is out to make a sequel, you know, cash in on all of the movie
murder hoopla, so it's our job to observe rules of a sequel. Number one,
the body count is always bigger, number 2, the death scenes are always
much more elaborate, more blood, more gore, carnage candy. Your core
audience just expects it. And number three, never...
DEWEY
How do we find the killer Randy, that's what I want to know!
RANDY
Well, let's look at the suspects. There's Derek, the obvious boyfriend,
hello Billy Loomis! His knife cut missed every major vein and artery and
he pitied on Sid.
DEWEY
So you think it's Derek!
RANDY
Not so fast, let's assume if the killer or ers has half a brain, he's
not a Nick at Nite rerun type of guy, he wants to break some new ground,
so forget the boyfriend thing, it's tired. Who else doguy, he w
DEWEY
There's...
RANDY
Mickey, the freaky Tarantino film student. But if he is a suspect, so am
I. So, let's move on.
DEWEY
Well, let's not move on. What if you are a suspect?
RANDY
Well, if I'm a suspect, you're a suspect!
DEWEY
You've got a point, ok, let's move on to...
RANDY
Hallie.
DEWEY
Sid's roommate?
RANDY
Uh huh.
DEWEY
Typically, serial killers are white male.
RANDY
That's why it's perfect! It's sort of against the rules but not really.
Mrs. Voorhies was a terrific serial killer, and there's always room for
Candyman's daughter. She's sweet, she's bad for your teeth.
DEWEY
Come on Randy, these kids are your friends. Who do you think is the
killer?
RANDY
How about Gale Weathers?
DEWEY
Gale?! A Killer?!
RANDY
Why not?
DEWEY
Well, she is vicious.
RANDY
She's an opportunist. Isn't it conceivable she's planning her next book?
That's what reporters do Dewey.
DEWEY
Nah, Gale's a lot of things, but Gale's no killer.
RANDY
Look, just cause you're sweet on her...
DEWEY
No, I'm not.
RANDY
Come on, this is me talking here, Randy, the unrequited love slave to
Sidney Prescott, I know all about obsession and pain.
DEWEY
And you got your love scar to prove it.
RANDY
And so do you, I mean, what's up with that limp cause you were stabbed
in the back.
DEWEY
Severed nerve. Look, Gale's no killer.
RANDY
Ok, alright then, but if she's not a killer, she's a target.
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS
GALE
Joel, let's get some establishing shots done.
JOEL
Gale, can I talk to you for a second?
GALE
What is it?!
JOEL
Look, grant it I should've read your book before I took this job, but
I'm reading it now, and wooooo!!! I read what happened to your last
cameraman, the guy got gutted. Now, if I would do what any other
rational human would do, which is, get the fuck out of here!
GALE
First of all, he wasn't gutted, I made that up, his throat was slashed.
JOEL
Look, gutted, slashed, the guy ain't in the union no more!
GALE
This is national television, this could be a big chance for you. The
story is monumental. Don't you want to be a part of that?
JOEL
Yeah, but I want to report the news, I don't want to be the news.
GALE
It's a job Joel, and like most jobs, it has its drawbacks. Come on,
you're a professional cameraman, you've got to stay focused. I am
counting on you, I cannot do this without you. Alright? Let's get some
work done.
JOEL
Yeah, let's go get killed!
INT. COLLEGE THEATRE
GUS
We've been through this before, you know what I think you're potential
is.
SIDNEY
I know, but with the book, the movie, and my life.
GUS
I do understand how difficult this is for you. But Sid, you can win,
you're a fighter.
SIDNEY
Yeah, right, I'm a fighter.
GUS
I don't believe you.
SIDNEY
I'm a fighter.
GUS
I don't believe you, I don't.
SIDNEY
I'm a fighter.
GUS
The battle for the soul is from within, Cassandra is one of the many
Greek tragic victims. You can do it Sidney.
Sidney looks at Gus with confidence.
GUS
DEREK
"When you walked into the room, I think I love you, I think I love you,
so what am I so afraid of, I'm afraid that I'm not sure of, a love there
is no cure for. I think I love you, isn't that what life is made of, so
it worries me to say, I've never felt this way."
Derek continues singing as the cafeteria is cheering while Sidney
laughs.
DEREK
I want you to have this.
Derek gives Sidney his frat letters.
MICKEY
Hey, isn't that a big frat no no?
HALLIE
Oh, that's a big no no, you see, you're not supposed to give your
letters to your girl, no shape, no form. The brothers are gonna kick his
ass, but it's tradition.
MICKEY
It's tradition.
DEREK
I wanted you to have this for protection.
Sidney then kisses Derek.
INT. BASKIN ROBINS
INTERVIEWER ON TV
So, tell us about this part you're getting rave reviews for.
TORI SPELLING
Well, I play this girl named Sidney Prescott who finds out that her
boyfriend is this psycho killer who also killed her mother the year
before.
INTERVIEWER
So, what kind of research did you do for this part?
TORI SPELLING
Well, I read the book....
RANDY
I cannot believe it they get Tori Spelling to play Sid, and they cast
Joe Blow nobody to play me. At least you get David Schwimmer. I get the
guy who drove the stagecoach for one episode of Dr. Quinn.
INTERVIEWER
This is Tori Spelling in the new movie: STAB
SIDNEY IN STAB
Billy, what are you doing here?
BILLY IN STAB
They let me go Sid, I didn't do it.
SIDNEY IN STAB
No, please.
BILLY IN STAB
Why won't you let me touch you?
SIDNEY IN STAB
Look, I've gone through a lot lately, ever since my mom died.
BILLY IN STAB
Sid, look, I think you need to just deal with that, move on. I mean when
my mom left my dad, I accepted it, that's the way it is.
SIDNEY IN STAB
Yeah, your mom left town, she's not lying in a cemetary somewhere.
BILLY IN STAB
Stupid!
INTERVIEWER ON TV
Oooh! I love scary movies!
RANDY
I'll wait for video. Ok, let's get down to business, the way I see it,
someone is out to make a sequel, you know, cash in on all of the movie
murder hoopla, so it's our job to observe rules of a sequel. Number one,
the body count is always bigger, number 2, the death scenes are always
much more elaborate, more blood, more gore, carnage candy. Your core
audience just expects it. And number three, never...
DEWEY
How do we find the killer Randy, that's what I want to know!
RANDY
Well, let's look at the suspects. There's Derek, the obvious boyfriend,
hello Billy Loomis! His knife cut missed every major vein and artery and
he pitied on Sid.
DEWEY
So you think it's Derek!
RANDY
Not so fast, let's assume if the killer or ers has half a brain, he's
not a Nick at Nite rerun type of guy, he wants to break some new ground,
so forget the boyfriend thing, it's tired. Who else doguy, he w
DEWEY
There's...
RANDY
Mickey, the freaky Tarantino film student. But if he is a suspect, so am
I. So, let's move on.
DEWEY
Well, let's not move on. What if you are a suspect?
RANDY
Well, if I'm a suspect, you're a suspect!
DEWEY
You've got a point, ok, let's move on to...
RANDY
Hallie.
DEWEY
Sid's roommate?
RANDY
Uh huh.
DEWEY
Typically, serial killers are white male.
RANDY
That's why it's perfect! It's sort of against the rules but not really.
Mrs. Voorhies was a terrific serial killer, and there's always room for
Candyman's daughter. She's sweet, she's bad for your teeth.
DEWEY
Come on Randy, these kids are your friends. Who do you think is the
killer?
RANDY
How about Gale Weathers?
DEWEY
Gale?! A Killer?!
RANDY
Why not?
DEWEY
Well, she is vicious.
RANDY
She's an opportunist. Isn't it conceivable she's planning her next book?
That's what reporters do Dewey.
DEWEY
Nah, Gale's a lot of things, but Gale's no killer.
RANDY
Look, just cause you're sweet on her...
DEWEY
No, I'm not.
RANDY
Come on, this is me talking here, Randy, the unrequited love slave to
Sidney Prescott, I know all about obsession and pain.
DEWEY
And you got your love scar to prove it.
RANDY
And so do you, I mean, what's up with that limp cause you were stabbed
in the back.
DEWEY
Severed nerve. Look, Gale's no killer.
RANDY
Ok, alright then, but if she's not a killer, she's a target.
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS
GALE
Joel, let's get some establishing shots done.
JOEL
Gale, can I talk to you for a second?
GALE
What is it?!
JOEL
Look, grant it I should've read your book before I took this job, but
I'm reading it now, and wooooo!!! I read what happened to your last
cameraman, the guy got gutted. Now, if I would do what any other
rational human would do, which is, get the fuck out of here!
GALE
First of all, he wasn't gutted, I made that up, his throat was slashed.
JOEL
Look, gutted, slashed, the guy ain't in the union no more!
GALE
This is national television, this could be a big chance for you. The
story is monumental. Don't you want to be a part of that?
JOEL
Yeah, but I want to report the news, I don't want to be the news.
GALE
It's a job Joel, and like most jobs, it has its drawbacks. Come on,
you're a professional cameraman, you've got to stay focused. I am
counting on you, I cannot do this without you. Alright? Let's get some
work done.
JOEL
Yeah, let's go get killed!
INT. COLLEGE THEATRE
GUS
We've been through this before, you know what I think you're potential
is.
SIDNEY
I know, but with the book, the movie, and my life.
GUS
I do understand how difficult this is for you. But Sid, you can win,
you're a fighter.
SIDNEY
Yeah, right, I'm a fighter.
GUS
I don't believe you.
SIDNEY
I'm a fighter.
GUS
I don't believe you, I don't.
SIDNEY
I'm a fighter.
GUS
The battle for the soul is from within, Cassandra is one of the many
Greek tragic victims. You can do it Sidney.
Sidney looks at Gus with confidence.
GUS
There's no understudy, I'm desperate. Ok, clear the set, third act, one
last time. Cue the music.
"Troy" music begins with men in Greek masks recite the following:
CAST
Oh be dredded holder,
lying in the opening depths of the ocean,
and now stands, the victim Cassandra.
Sidney arises as Cassandra.
SIDNEY
No crime has god pusnished,
the scene continues.
As Sidney is taking across the scene, she begins to see the masked
killer, as she runs from one corner of the stage to the next, Sidney
eventually runs into what she thinks is the killer.
SIDNEY
Ahhhhhh!!!!!
GUS
Cut! Take five.
The scene stops, the actors look at Sidney in confusion. Sidney,
embarassed, runs offstage.
GUS
Sidney!
INT. THEATRE BEHIND THE STAGE
DEREK
Sid.
SIDNEY
Derek, how long have you been here?
DEREK
I just got here.
SIDNEY
What happened to Mickey?
DEREK
We swapped. He had to edit, you got me instead.
SIDNEY
Derek, please don't. I just need to be left alone, I need some distance,
ok?
DEREK
I guess I am supposed to be understanding and go along with it?
SIDNEY
Yeah.
DEREK
You got it.
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS UNDER A TREE
GALE
So, let's just assume that the killer or killers are planning their
next.. (Phone rings) Hello? I'll have to call you back.
DEWEY
Well, that doesn't make sense, Sidney wasn't killed in Woodsboro.
RANDY
Well, at least not for a lack of trying. The killer is trying to finish
what was started.
GALE
Well, it was under her protection right? (Phonie rings) Hello? Tell Bob,
I'll call him back!
DEWEY
When did she start smoking?
RANDY
Ever since those nude pictures on the internet.
GALE
It was just my head, it was Jennifer Aniston's body! Look, there were
more victims: Tatum, my cameraman, Himbry...
JOEL
Now hold up for a second there, I don't need to be hearing about some
dead cameraman. Listen, I am a verb away from vacating these premises.
I'm gonna get some coffee, doughnuts, prozac, see if I can find some
crack, Special K of Malcolm X, and I'll be back when you all start
talking about something more Saved by the Bellish.
DEWEY
He seems a little sense.
GALE
Don't worry about him! If the killer is trying to copycat, who's next?
DEWEY
I wouldn't copycat any killer, we all were involved in Woodsboro.
GALE
So what do you want to do about it bonehead? Just want to sit and see
who drops next.
DEWEY
Well, I don't know (Gale's phone rings again) bonehead!
Gale's phone rings again.
RANDY
Gale's not here!
VOICE
I'm not interrupting anything am I? You three look deep in thought. Have
you ever felt the a knife tear through flesh and scrape the bottom of
the bone beneath? (Voice laughs devilishly).
RANDY
It's him.
DEWEY
Who?
RANDY
The killer, he can see us.
Gale, Dewey, and Randy arise to look around.
DEWEY
Just keep him on the phone.
RANDY
What do you want me to say?
DEWEY
I don't know, just keep him talking. Come on Gale.
GALE
What are we doing?
DEWEY
Trying to find someone with a cell phone.
RANDY
Uh hi, what's your favorite scary movie?
VOICE
They'll never find me.
RANDY
What do you care? Let them have their fun. So, what's up?
VOICE
What's your favorite scary movie?
RANDY
Showgirls, absolutley frightening!
GIRL
Hey!
RANDY
Sorry. So, what's your favorite scary movie? The Dorm that Dripped
Blood, The House on Sorority Row, Graduation Day? Ahhh!!
VOICE
Too slow geek.
GALE
Who's this?
GIRL ON PHONE
Who's this?!
GALE
Gale Weathers, author of "The Woodsboro Murders."
GIRL ON PHONE
Who?
DEWEY
Come on Gale. White male suspect, 9 o'clock.
GALE
Your clock or my clock?
DEWEY
Your clock.
VOICE
Why are you even here Randy? You'll neve be the leading man.
RANDY
Fuck you!
RANDY
Shit! Sorry man.
VOICE
No matter how hard you try, you'll never get the girl.
RANDY
Oh, so let's redirect a moment's I'm so original?
MAN
Hey! Can I help you?
GALE
Hello?
GIRL ON PHONE
Hello? Hello?
GALE
Sorry.
DEWEY
Sorry.
RANDY
Why copycat two high school loser ass dickheads? Stu was pussy ass wet
rag, and Billy Loomis, Billy Loomis, what the fuck?! What a rat looking
homo repressed momma's boy! You wanna be one of the big boys, Manson,
Bundy, OJ?
The killer grabs Randy from behind and pulls him into Gale's newsvan.
The killer slams Randy against the back window, shattering the glass,
while 3 unnoticing guys dance by with their boom box. The killer stabs
Randy 4 times until Randy is dead. The killer gets out of the van and
walks away.
DEWEY
Where's Randy?
GALE
Randy!
JOEL
What's going on? Hey, who broke my window?!!
Dewey opens the van door to see Randy's mutilated and bloody body as
Gale screams for her life and Joel loses conciousness.
Sidney is sitting in the library in the computer lab.
SIDNEY
Did your computer just freeze?
GUY
You have an instant message, just hit ALT M.
SIDNEY
Yeah, but I'm not signed on.
GUY
Someone in the library, all of the terminals are connected.
Sidney hits ALT M to reveal a disturbing message that reads:
Instant Message:
You are going to die tonight.
Sidney stands up as the chair falls back and hits ALT M to get another
instant message.
The police can't save you.
SIDNEY
He's here.
OFFICER RICHARDS
Get her away from the computer!
OFFICER ANDREWS
Sid, it's probably just a sick joke. Wait here OK?
SIDNEY
Yeah.
COTTON
Sidney, can we talk for a second?
SIDNEY
Now's not a good time Cotton.
COTTON
Come on Sid, you sent me to prison for over a year, you can at least
give me 5 minutes. Look, I was sitting at home, and guess who calls me
out of the blue, but Diane Sawyer.
SIDNEY
What?
COTTON
She says that if you agree to go on the air with your story, she'll give
us the entire hour. Can you imagine, you, me and Diane Sawyer? We're
talking Primetime here!
SIDNEY
Cotton, I can't.
COTTON
Look, it's not like we're getting paid here also with what I've got
going the side with a 900 number. Look Sid, I understand that you don't
like the press, I respect that but Sid, (Cotton laughs psychotically),
it's Diane Sawyer! Hello!
SIDNEY
Look, between the movie and the book, people know the truth. There's
already been enough exposure. Why would you want anymore exposure?
COTTON
Well, I don't know Sid, cause maybe I fucking deserve a little exosure!
Come Sid, I mean, you drag my name through the mud, everyone thinks I am
some kind of psycho, and all I am asking is for one little fucking Diane
Sawyer interview. Now, I don't think I am being unreasonable.
SIDNEY
I'm sorry Cotton, but no!
COTTON
You're sorry, huh? You're sorry! Loveable and fucked up Sidney Prescott,
everyone's favorite little victim!
Cops handcuff Cotton when Cotton outbursts at Sidney in the library.
COTTON
Jesus! She killed Billy Loomis, he's dead for christ sake!
INT. POLICE STATION
CHIEF HARTLEY
Run it by me one more time, why did you attack Sidney Prescott?
COTTON
GALE
Joel, let's get some establishing shots done.
JOEL
Gale, can I talk to you for a second?
GALE
What is it?!
JOEL
Look, grant it I should've read your book before I took this job, but
I'm reading it now, and wooooo!!! I read what happened to your last
cameraman, the guy got gutted. Now, if I would do what any other
rational human would do, which is, get the fuck out of here!
GALE
First of all, he wasn't gutted, I made that up, his throat was slashed.
JOEL
Look, gutted, slashed, the guy ain't in the union no more!
GALE
This is national television, this could be a big chance for you. The
story is monumental. Don't you want to be a part of that?
JOEL
Yeah, but I want to report the news, I don't want to be the news.
GALE
It's a job Joel, and like most jobs, it has its drawbacks. Come on,
you're a professional cameraman, you've got to stay focused. I am
counting on you, I cannot do this without you. Alright? Let's get some
work done.
JOEL
Yeah, let's go get killed!
INT. COLLEGE THEATRE
GUS
We've been through this before, you know what I think you're potential
is.
SIDNEY
I know, but with the book, the movie, and my life.
GUS
I do understand how difficult this is for you. But Sid, you can win,
you're a fighter.
SIDNEY
Yeah, right, I'm a fighter.
GUS
I don't believe you.
SIDNEY
I'm a fighter.
GUS
I don't believe you, I don't.
SIDNEY
I'm a fighter.
GUS
The battle for the soul is from within, Cassandra is one of the many
Greek tragic victims. You can do it Sidney.
Sidney looks at Gus with confidence.
GUS
There's no understudy, I'm desperate. Ok, clear the set, third act, one
last time. Cue the music.
"Troy" music begins with men in Greek masks recite the following:
CAST
Oh be dredded holder,
lying in the opening depths of the ocean,
and now stands, the victim Cassandra.
Sidney arises as Cassandra.
SIDNEY
No crime has god pusnished,
the scene continues.
As Sidney is taking across the scene, she begins to see the masked
killer, as she runs from one corner of the stage to the next, Sidney
eventually runs into what she thinks is the killer.
SIDNEY
Ahhhhhh!!!!!
GUS
Cut! Take five.
The scene stops, the actors look at Sidney in confusion. Sidney,
embarassed, runs offstage.
GUS
Sidney!
INT. THEATRE BEHIND THE STAGE
DEREK
Sid.
SIDNEY
Derek, how long have you been here?
DEREK
I just got here.
SIDNEY
What happened to Mickey?
DEREK
We swapped. He had to edit, you got me instead.
SIDNEY
Derek, please don't. I just need to be left alone, I need some distance,
ok?
DEREK
I guess I am supposed to be understanding and go along with it?
SIDNEY
Yeah.
DEREK
You got it.
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS UNDER A TREE
GALE
So, let's just assume that the killer or killers are planning their
next.. (Phone rings) Hello? I'll have to call you back.
DEWEY
Well, that doesn't make sense, Sidney wasn't killed in Woodsboro.
RANDY
Well, at least not for a lack of trying. The killer is trying to finish
what was started.
GALE
Well, it was under her protection right? (Phonie rings) Hello? Tell Bob,
I'll call him back!
DEWEY
When did she start smoking?
RANDY
Ever since those nude pictures on the internet.
GALE
It was just my head, it was Jennifer Aniston's body! Look, there were
more victims: Tatum, my cameraman, Himbry...
JOEL
Now hold up for a second there, I don't need to be hearing about some
dead cameraman. Listen, I am a verb away from vacating these premises.
I'm gonna get some coffee, doughnuts, prozac, see if I can find some
crack, Special K of Malcolm X, and I'll be back when you all start
talking about something more Saved by the Bellish.
DEWEY
He seems a little sense.
GALE
Don't worry about him! If the killer is trying to copycat, who's next?
DEWEY
I wouldn't copycat any killer, we all were involved in Woodsboro.
GALE
So what do you want to do about it bonehead? Just want to sit and see
who drops next.
DEWEY
Well, I don't know (Gale's phone rings again) bonehead!
Gale's phone rings again.
RANDY
Gale's not here!
VOICE
I'm not interrupting anything am I? You three look deep in thought. Have
you ever felt the a knife tear through flesh and scrape the bottom of
the bone beneath? (Voice laughs devilishly).
RANDY
It's him.
DEWEY
Who?
RANDY
The killer, he can see us.
Gale, Dewey, and Randy arise to look around.
DEWEY
Just keep him on the phone.
RANDY
What do you want me to say?
DEWEY
I don't know, just keep him talking. Come on Gale.
GALE
What are we doing?
DEWEY
Trying to find someone with a cell phone.
RANDY
Uh hi, what's your favorite scary movie?
VOICE
They'll never find me.
RANDY
What do you care? Let them have their fun. So, what's up?
VOICE
What's your favorite scary movie?
RANDY
Showgirls, absolutley frightening!
GIRL
Hey!
RANDY
Sorry. So, what's your favorite scary movie? The Dorm that Dripped
Blood, The House on Sorority Row, Graduation Day? Ahhh!!
VOICE
Too slow geek.
GALE
Who's this?
GIRL ON PHONE
Who's this?!
GALE
Gale Weathers, author of "The Woodsboro Murders."
GIRL ON PHONE
Who?
DEWEY
Come on Gale. White male suspect, 9 o'clock.
GALE
Your clock or my clock?
DEWEY
Your clock.
VOICE
Why are you even here Randy? You'll neve be the leading man.
RANDY
Fuck you!
RANDY
Shit! Sorry man.
VOICE
No matter how hard you try, you'll never get the girl.
RANDY
Oh, so let's redirect a moment's I'm so original?
MAN
Hey! Can I help you?
GALE
Hello?
GIRL ON PHONE
Hello? Hello?
GALE
Sorry.
DEWEY
Sorry.
RANDY
Why copycat two high school loser ass dickheads? Stu was pussy ass wet
rag, and Billy Loomis, Billy Loomis, what the fuck?! What a rat looking
homo repressed momma's boy! You wanna be one of the big boys, Manson,
Bundy, OJ?
The killer grabs Randy from behind and pulls him into Gale's newsvan.
The killer slams Randy against the back window, shattering the glass,
while 3 unnoticing guys dance by with their boom box. The killer stabs
Randy 4 times until Randy is dead. The killer gets out of the van and
walks away.
DEWEY
Where's Randy?
GALE
Randy!
JOEL
What's going on? Hey, who broke my window?!!
Dewey opens the van door to see Randy's mutilated and bloody body as
Gale screams for her life and Joel loses conciousness.
Sidney is sitting in the library in the computer lab.
SIDNEY
Did your computer just freeze?
GUY
You have an instant message, just him ALT M.
SIDNEY
Yeah, but I'm not signed on.
GUY
Someone in the library, all of the terminals are connected.
Sidney hits ALT M to reveal a disturbing message that reads:
Instant Message:
You are going to die tonight.
Sidney stands up as the chair falls back and hits ALT M to get another
instant message.
The police can't save you.
SIDNEY
He's here.
OFFICER RICHARDS
Get her away from the computer!
OFFICER ANDREWS
Sid, it's probably just a sick joke. Wait here OK?
SIDNEY
Yeah.
COTTON
Sidney, can we talk for a second?
SIDNEY
Now's not a good time Cotton.
COTTON
Come on Sid, you sent me to prison for over a year, you can at least
give me 5 minutes. Look, I was sitting at home, and guess who calls me
out of the blue, but Diane Sawyer.
SIDNEY
What?
COTTON
She says that if you agree to go on the air with your story, she'll give
us the entire hour. Can you imagine, you, me and Diane Sawyer? We're
talking Primetime here!
SIDNEY
Cotton, I can't.
COTTON
Look, it's not like we're getting paid here also with what I've got
going the side with a 900 number. Look Sid, I understand that you don't
like the press, I respect that but Sid, (Cotton laughs psychotically),
it's Diane Sawyer! Hello!
SIDNEY
Look, between the movie and the book, people know the truth. There's
already been enough exposure. Why would you want anymore exposure?
COTTON
Well, I don't know Sid, cause maybe I fucking deserve a little exosure!
Come Sid, I mean, you drag my name through the mud, everyone thinks I am
some kind of psycho, and all I am asking is for one little fucking Diane
Sawyer interview. Now, I don't think I am being unreasonable.
SIDNEY
I'm sorry Cotton, but no!
COTTON
You're sorry, huh? You're sorry! Loveable and fucked up Sidney Prescott,
everyone's favorite little victim!
Cops handcuff Cotton when Cotton outbursts at Sidney in the library.
COTTON
Jesus! She killed Billy Loomis, he's dead for christ sake!
INT. POLICE STATION
CHIEF HARTLEY
Run it by me one more time, why did you attack Sidney Prescott?
COTTON
There was no attack, we were talking, very heatedly. Miss Prescott and I
have a very complicated past.
CHIEF HARTLEY
You better hope that your alibis are tight.
SIDNEY
It shouldn't have been Randy, it should've been me!
DEWEY
No, no.
SIDNEY
I should call his mother.
DEWEY
Sid, I already made that phone call. Are you alright?
SIDNEY
Stop treating me like glass Dewey, I'm not gonna break.
HALLIE
It's ok to break.
CHIEF HARTLEY
We're dealing with four murders here. You watch your mouth!
COTTON
The only thing you have me for is raising my voice in a public library.
OFFICER ANDREWS
And homicide isn't a serious crime?
COTTON
Might I remind you that I am an innocent man here! Don't you watch TV,
Current Edition? That was a very insightful program which made it
abundently clear that I am an innocent man, so until you see me standing
over a dead body with a knife in my hand, you better treat me with the
rights and privileges that every innocent citizen in this country has!
DEWEY
What's going on?
CHIEF HARTLEY
We're letting him go. We have got nothing on him.
COTTON
Gale. Enjoying the show. The cops are funny.
GALE
What do you think you're doing?
COTTON
Waiting for my 15 minutes of fame.
GALE
Don't do anything stupid Cotton.
COTTON
Gale, you were so instrumental in my freedom, are having sudden
character doubts?
COTTON
Sidney, if you change your mind.
CHIEF HARTLEY
Come on, get out of here.
DEWEY
Sorry about that, what a creep! They're gonna take you somewhere safe
Sid.
SIDNEY
Yeah, where's that?
HALLIE
I don't know but I'll be there with you.
SIDNEY
Who's doing this Dewey, if not Cotton, then who?
DEWEY
I don't know Sid but I'll find him.
EXT. POLICE STATION
REPORTER
Gale, how does it feel to be on the other side of the news?
REPORTERS
Cotton!!
REPORTER
Cotton, have you been officially released?
COTTON
This is all just some huge misunderstanding. Hey Gale, how about a
photo?
DEBBIE
How are you holding up Gale? How does it feel to know that someone is
watching and waiting?
GALE
Look local woman, I know that you hold me up as your career template and
that it gives you some kind of charge to challenge, but give it a rest!
DEBBIE
You're right, it was the wrong time, I'm sorry.
GALE
Where are you going?
JOEL
Oh let's see, for starters, they punnied up my van, it's now an official
crime scene, thanks to you. Here's your footage. See ya, wouldn't want
to be ya!
GALE
Joel, I need you!
JOEL
No, you need to have your head examined.
GALE
I feel bad Dewey, I feel really bad! I never say that cause I never feel
bad about anything, but I feel bad now.
DEWEY
Is this just another brilliant Gale Weathers performance?
GALE
There are cameras here, I just wanna find this fucker! I really do.
DEWEY
Me too. Can I give you a hand with this? What's in here?
GALE
Just some crowd footage that Joel shot. Hey, wait a minute. If the
killer is watching and releshing every moment, then he'd be here on one
of these tapes.
DEWEY
It's worth a look.
GALE
It's definitely worth a look.
INT. COLLEGE LECTURE HALL BUILDING
GALE
Here we go! Video archives.
DEWEY
It's locked.
GALE
Can you pick it?
DEWEY
That would be breaking and entering.
GALE
No shit. What's down there?
INT. LECTURE HALL WITH TV's AND VCR's
DEWEY
Now, we're getting somewhere.
GALE
Perfect!
Gale and Dewey unload the tapes, Dewey accidentally drops one of the
tapes and as Gale and Dewey both go to pick up the tape, they bump
heads.
GALE
Ouch!
DEWEY
I'm sorry. Are you ok?
GALE
Yeah, ow.
Dewey and Gale grab the tap at the same time while they stare at each
other for a minute. Dewey takes the tape and puts it into the VCR, he
scans through the tape, seeing footage from the press conference, etc.
Dewey stops in on an earlier argument he had with Gale.
GALE
You're cute when you're angry.
DEWEY
I was being rude. I was being rude and insensitive.
GALE
Hey Dewey, I'm sorry, hey, look I never meant to hurt you.
Dewey then grabs Gale and then kisses her passionately. A thump is then
heard, as Gale and Dewey look up. Gale looks at a tape showing footage
of Phil, Maureen, Cici, and Randy.
GALE
Dewey!
DEWEY
Sorry.
GALE
That's not my footage.
Suddenly, the camera shows a live shot of Dewey and Gale as Dewey and
Gale look around for the killer.
DEWEY
Look, up there!
GALE
No Dewey! Don't!
Dewey runs up into the control room to find the killer.
GALE
Dewey!
Dewey comes out of the room.
DEWEY
There's no one there.
The killer suddenly jumps up from behind Gale with a knife.
GALE
Ahhhhh!!!!!
Dewey runs after the killer after Gale dodges the killer's knife. Dewey
runs downs down the steps as his limp causes him to tumble down the
steps. Gale hits the killer with a phone as she runs out of the room and
into a hall as she looks for the nearest door. She opens a door to a
dark room with no light whatsoever. Gale turns the light where she
realizes she is in a sound room. She looks over and the killer is in the
other room looking for her. The killer opens the door to the room where
Gale is and sees that Gale is gone but is hiding behind a dividing wall.
As the killer searches for Gale, she sneaks from one dividing wall to
the next. Gale escapes into another sound room where there is no lock on
the door.
GALE
Fuck!
A door from the other sound room opens, Dewey looking for Gale. He sees
her in the other room.
DEWEY
Gale! Gale!
Dewey goes up to the glass window and starts banging on the window for
Gale's attention.
DEWEY
Gale!
Gale cannot hear him since she the room is soundproof. Dewey looks down
and sees that his foot is in some leftover pizza on the floor. Dewey
continues to bang on the window...
DEWEY
Gale!
Suddenly, the killer comes from behind as grabs Dewey. Dewey grabs the
microphone.
DEWEY
Gale!!!!
Gale turns around to see Dewey being stabbed in the back several times
as the killer slams Dewey against the glass window with blood as Dewey
falls.
GALE
No!!!!
Gale looks up to see the killer go to the door to the room where Gale is
hiding. Gale pushes over a cabinet to block the door as the killer's
bloody knife is being swinged everywhere. The killer grabs a stool from
the other room and throws it at the glass window.
GALE
Ahh!! No!!
The stool cannot break the glass since the window is used with
plexiglass. The killer bangs against the window.
GALE
Ahhhh!
Gale kneels down on the floor as she looks up and sees that the killer
is gone.
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS
SIDNEY
Derek. What are you doing here?
HALLIE
Hey, I'm her therapist. Bye Derek.
DEREK
Bye.
SIDNEY
So, I better go.
DEREK
I'll still be here when you get back.
Sidney looks at Derek and gets into the cop car.
MAN
Hey, you! Prepare to die, you gave up your letters!
LOIS
WOOOOO!!!!! Yeah!!
MURPHY
Wooohoooo!!
LOIS
This is so romantic!
MURPHY
And so greek!!
The next scene is at a frat party on the theatre stage where Derek's
frat brothers, Lois, and Murphy have Derek tied in the pouring beer down
his pants.
GUY
Who do you love brother?!
DEREK
Sidney!
GUY
Did you say, "My Omega Kappa Beta" brother?!?
DEREK
No! I said, Sidney!!
The next scene is at a red light where the cop car with Sidney, Hallie,
Officer Richards and Officer Andrews stop.
HALLIE
So, where are you taking us?
OFFICER RICHARDS
If we tell you, we'd have to kill you!
OFFICER ANDREWS
Don't live, don't tell! AHHHHHH!!!
The killer jumps up from the front and breaks through the drivers side
window, slitting Officer Andrews' throat.
SIDNEY and HALLIE
Ahhhhh!!!!!!
Officer Richards gets out of the car where the killer kicks him in the
head and slams his head against the car while Sidney and Hallie are
screaming while trying to get out of the car. The killer comes through
the front and pushes the very dead Officer Andrews out onto the street.
Officer Richards jumps up with a gun in front of the car.
OFFICER RICHARDS
Get out of the car you fucker!
The killer slams the car into drive raming in the car into Officer
Richards as it causes the cop to land onto the hood of the car. The
killer drives the car into the side of a car where it crashes against a
wall in the middle of a construction site. Officer Richards' face is
mushed into the car windshield while he dies while clasping onto his
gun. Sidney and Hallie come up while holding their heads. Sidney looks
up front to see the killer still in the driver's seat, unconscious.
HALLIE
Do you think he is dead?
SIDNEY
I don't think so. He's still breathing.
Hallie sees Officer Richards.
HALLIE
Do you think he is dead?
SIDNEY
Oh god, I think so.
SIDNEY and HALLIE grab the door handles.
HALLIE
How are we supposed to get out?
SIDNEY
We're not, it's a cop car.
Sidney and Hallie bang on the windows trying anyway to get out.
SIDNEY
Look.
HALLIE
What?
Sidney sees a pole has put a hole in the fenced in area from the front
to the back, as Sidney begins to yank the protective fence down.
SIDNEY
Help me here!
HALLIE
Oh god Sid!
Sidney and Hallie yank the fence down successfully as Sidney crawls over
to the front seat while the killer still sits unconscious. Sidney tries
to get through the front passenger's door but has no luck.
SIDNEY
We're jammed up against a wall.
Sidney looks over at the killer as her hand goes to mask, ready to
unmask the killer.
HALLIE
Oh my god! Sid!
Sidney's elbow grasps the steering wheel as the car's hown goes off as
Sidney jumps back.
HALLIE
Oh my god! Don't do that again!!
Sidney yanks the front driver's seat door handle but is unable to open
the door.
SIDNEY
I'll have to go through the window.
Sidney climbs out through the window as she slowly gets out while she
climbs over the unconscious killer.
HALLIE
Sid! Sid!
Sidney gets out successfully as she immediately tries to get Hallie out.
SIDNEY
I can't, it's locked, you'll have to go through the front.
HALLIE
Shit!
HALLIE climbs over the seat to the front.
HALLIE
Oh god!
SIDNEY
Shhh, easy, easy. Good.
SIDNEY grabs Hallie as she climbs through the window and out the onto
the street.
HALLIE
Come on Sid!
HALLIE and Sidney start running down the street.
SIDNEY
Hallie.
HALLIE
What?
SIDNEY
I wanna know who it is.
HALLIE
Oh no Sidney, come on!! Look, look, stupid people some back, smart
people run. We're smart, so we should just get the fuck out of here!
SIDNEY
I'm sick of running Hallie! Besides, if we know who it is, it'll be
over.
HALLIE
We can just get the police!
SIDNEY
Yeah, and when we come back, he'll be gone! I have to do it, it'll just
take a minute.
HALLIE
Oh Sidney, come back!! Sid! Shit!
Sidney runs back to the car where the killer is gone from the driver's
seat.
SIDNEY
Oh shit!
HALLIE
What?!
SIDNEY
He's gone!
HALLIE
What?
The killer suddenly jumps from behind an alley where he grabs Hallie and
stabs her repeatedly several times and Hallie falls dead.
SIDNEY
Ahhhh!!!!
Sidney begins running as the killer starts running and suddenly stops.
INT. COLLEGE LECTURE BUILDING HALLWAY
GALE
Ahhhh!!!
COTTON
Ahhh!!!
Gale looks at Cotton to see blood on his hands.
GALE
Get away from me!
COTTON
No Gale, this isn't what it looks like. I found Dewey, I tried to help
him. No please, wait Gale! Gale!
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS
GALE
Help me!!!!
DEBBIE
Curfew is still in effect....
GALE
Give me the phone!
DEBBIE
Gale, I was in the middle of a story!
GALE
I got your god damn story! Operator, give me the police!!
DEBBIE
What's happening?!
GALE
Hello, the killer is Cotton Fucking Weary!!!!
DEBBIE
Cotton Weary?!?
INT. THEATRE
The music begins in the theatre of the Greek production, while outside
Sidney runs to the theatre.
SIDNEY
Hello? Gus?! Hello?! Gus?!
Suddenly the music stops, as a spotlight shines on Sidney.
SIDNEY
Hello?
A set comes closing in on Sidney behind her as she decides to head
offstage where the set closes down, trapping Sidney onstage. The
spotlight goes from Sidney to Derek's shirt that is hanging up. Sidney
looks around as lighting flashes where a hanging body drops behind
Sidney.
SIDNEY
Ahhhhh!!!! Derek!
Derek is still tied up from the frat party, passed out from the alcohol.
SIDNEY
Derek?!
Sidney slaps Derek to wake him up.
SIDNEY
Derek!
DEREK
Oh thank god Sidney, I thought I was gonna be up there until opening
night.
SIDNEY
Oh shit, the killer is here. He killed Hallie, he's here.
DEREK
What are you talking about?
SIDNEY
The killer! He's here!
DEREK
Where?
VOICE
Right here!
Sidney turns around while Derek looks up to see the killer.
DEREK
Come on Sid, get me down!
VOICE
So, you think is your fest Sid? Don't ya know history repeats itself,
huh Sid?
SIDNEY
Oh my god!
The killer pulls off his mask to reveal himself, IT'S MICKEY!!
SIDNEY
Mickey?!
MICKEY using VOICE CHANGER
Surprise Sid!
DEREK
What the hell?
MICKEY
Since Derek here disappeared on my ass, I've been alone all night.
Thanks a lot partner!
SIDNEY
What? My god! Derek!
DEREK
No, no Sid!!
MICKEY
It's ok Derek, we got her!
DEREK
Sid, he's crazy, he's lying!!
MICKEY
What's the matter Derek? Think Sidney's experiencing a little deja vu?
DEREK
Sid, he's lying! Sid, untie me! Untie me!
MICKEY
Boyfriend, killer, boyfriend, killer, boyfriend, killer.
DEREK
No, I am gonna fucking kill you! You are dead! I am gonna fucking kill
you, fucking kill you!!
Mickey shoots the gun at Derek, badly wounding Derek in the chest.
SIDNEY
Ahhhhhh!!!!!!!! Derek!
DEREK
I would never ever hurt you.
Derek slowly dies.
SIDNEY
Derek?
SIDNEY starts crying as she looks at Mickey with hatred.
MICKEY
You really should start using your trust issues Sid! I mean poor Derek
here, such a nice boy! He was bright, funny, had a decent singing voice,
and he was gonna be a doctor! This was the kind of guy you'd like to
bring home to mom. If you had a mom!!
SIDNEY
Fuck you!!!!
MICKEY
Oh! So vulgar! You think Billy would've put up with that?
SIDNEY
Billy was a sick fuck just like you!
MICKEY
No, Billy was a sick fuck wanted to get away!! Mickey is a sick fuck who
wants to get caught. You see Sid, I have it all planned out. I have my
whole defense planned out. I'm gonna blame the movies. It's pretty cool,
huh? It's never been done before. And wait till the trial, cause these
days, it's all about the trial! Can't you see it Sid, the effects of
cinema violence on Americans. I'll get Cochran or Dershovitz to
represent me. Bob Dole You see Sid, I have it all planned out. I have my
whole defense planned out. I'm gonna blam
SIDNEY
You're a psychotic!
MICKEY
Yeah, well, shhhhhh!! That'll be our little secret. The was one thing
that Billy was right, it's all about execution!
SIDNEY
Yeah? Well, you're forgetting one thing about Billy Loomis!
MICKEY
Yeah? What's that?
SIDNEY
I fucking killed him!
Sidney smacks Derek's frat letters across Mickey's face, causing him to
drop the gun while Sidney kicks him.
SIDNEY
You piece of shit!
After a series of struggles, Mickey manages to retreive the gun against
Sidney.
MICKEY
Sidney, you've got a Linda Hamilton thing going on there? No, it's nice,
I like it.
Suddenly, Derek's tied up body goes flying up.
MICKEY
Now, who's doing that?! Could that be..... a mystery guest waiting in
the wings?! Told you I had a partner Sid, surprise cameo just for you!
A door opens from backstage as Gale walks in.
SIDNEY
Gale.
Gale shakes her head no as Debbie comes walking in with a gun.
SIDNEY
Mrs. Loomis?
GALE
What?!
MICKEY
Billy's mother!! Nice surprise Sid, didn't see it coming, did ya?!
GALE
No, it can't be. I've seen pictures of you.
SIDNEY
Loses 60 pounds and a lot of work done.
DEBBIE
It's called a makeover, you should try it. Look a little tired yourself
there Gale!
GALE
So, you two are in this together?
MICKEY
Yeah, well, I had to have financing. Tuition's expensive. Deb here, my
backer, we met on the internet, psycho website, "Class of Knives."
DEBBIE
It's estimated that there are only 97 acting serial killers in the
country today. So Mickey here was quite a find, definitely one on the
way up, all he needed was a little guidance and nurturing.
SIDNEY
As only a mother could do.
MICKEY
Wait until the trial! It is gonna rock!!
DEBBIE
Oh Mickey, there's not going to be a trial!
DEBBIE shoots Mickey a few times as Mickey's gun fires hitting a running
Gale in the stomach.
SIDNEY
Gale!
Gale falls offstage.
DEBBIE
Two birds, one stone. Talk about being rational! For Mickey, I don't
blame the movies, my god. I'm very sane, my motive isn't as 90's as
Mickey's, mine is just plain old revenge. You killed my son! And now I
kill you, and I can't think of anything more rational.
SIDNEY
You're never gonna get away with this.
DEBBIE
Oh, of course I will. Everything is traceable back to Mickey, including
the cop gun that he used to kill everyone. You see, let's say that you
discovered Mickey was the killer and you got into a huge scuffle and you
shot Mickey. Shot Mickey dead, but not before he got off on one shot at
you. So, have I cleared up everything, does anyone have any questions?
No, ok, besides, who gives a flying fuck! Let them go and track down the
second supposed killer. Debbie Salt doesn't even exist.
SIDNEY
You're as crazy as your son was!
DEBBIE
What did you just say? Was that a negative remark about my son? About my
Billy?
SIDNEY
No, Billy was fine, Billy was perfect, you did a bang up job Mrs.
Loomis.
DEBBIE
Better watch what you say. Randy spoke poorly of Billy and I got a
little knife happy. You know what I am sick of? I'm sick to death of
people blaming the parents. That it all starts with the family! If you
should blame someone, why don't you blame your mother! She's the one who
stole my husband and my broke up my marriage, and then you took my son!
You don't know what it is like to be a mother. To love him, and guide
him..
SIDNEY
And abandon him! Isn't Mickey supposed to be dead?!!
SIDNEY hits Debbie on the head with a beer bottle, as Sidney runs into
the back door closing it as Debbie shoots. Sidney breaks an emergency
glass for an axe as she starts hacking wires trying to get Debbie.
Lights come crashing down, nealy missing Debbie as she rolls away.
Another hack, sends lights comes tumbling down as Debbie dodges again.
Debbie decides to climb over the scenery to get to Sidney. Sidney hacks
another wire as bricks come tumbling down on top of Debbie as she falls.
Sidney turns off all equipment and runs out as Debbie comes out at
Sidney with a knife. After some struggles, Sidney nearly misses being
stabbed when a gunshot fires.
COTTON
Don't you fucking move! God damn it!
SIDNEY
Thank god!
COTTON
Look, I've had a very bad day and I would like to know what the fuck is
going on here. Sidney?
SIDNEY
Cotton, meet Mrs. Loomis, Billy's mother, she's the killer!
COTTON
Who's that?
SIDNEY
The other killer. Mickey.
COTTON
Ok.
SIDNEY
Look Cotton.
COTTON
Shutup! Oh, so hi! You're not Debbie Salt, huh, from The Post Telegraph?
DEBBIE
I could still help you Cotton.
COTTON
Uh uh uh uh.
DEBBIE
Come on, you don't need her, let me kill her! Then, you're all that's
left, you're the star! She sent you to prison for over a year!!!
Personally, I think that's quite poetic.
SIDNEY
No, Cotton, don't you listen to her!!
COTTON
Woah! Ha ha! Woah! What a predicament you're in Sid. I mean, she does
make a good point. I bet that Diane Sawyer interview is looking pretty
good right now.
SIDNEY
Consider it done.
COTTON fires his gun.
SIDNEY
Ahhhh!!!!!
Both Sidney and Debbie fall as Sidney coughs and gets up to look at
Cotton.
COTTON
Woah. That was intense. Look Sid, you know I would never hurt you.
SIDNEY
Cotton, give me the gun.
COTTON
Ok, yeah, sure.
Sidney takes the gun and kneels down to see if Debbie is dead.
COTTON
Look Sid, maybe we should discuss about what went on here, get our
stories straight....
A hand from below grabs Sidney's hand as Sidney and Cotton jump.
GALE
Could someone get me out here!
SIDNEY
Gale, are you alright?
GALE
Of course not, I've been shot. Ow!
COTTON
Give me your hand Gale, Jesus you scared the crap out of me. So, are
there anymore down there?
GALE
No.
COTTON
Nothing like reporting from the trenches, huh Gale?
GALE
Shutup Cotton.
COTTON
How bad is it?
GALE
Just bounced off my rib.
COTTON
Jesus Gale, you got more lives than a cat.
GALE
Give me one of those. Is she dead?
SIDNEY
I don't know. They always come back, you know.
MICKEY suddenly jumps as Sidney and Gale shoot Mickey down dead.
COTTON
Woah!
SIDNEY then looks at Debbie and shoots her on the forehead. Gale and
Cotton look at Sidney in amazement.
SIDNEY
Just in case.
SIDNEY drops the gun and walks away.
EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS MORNING
PARAMEDIC
You've got a couple of brokn ribs there.
GALE
I'm ok. I'm alright.
JOEL
Gale? I'm back.
GALE
What?
JOEL
I'd figure we'd get the scoop. You know, like in the old days. You're
Gale Weathers at Windsor College.
PARAMEDIC
We've found a live on here!
GALE
Dewey!! Is he going to be OK?
PARAMEDIC
Old scar tissue saved him.
Dewey mumbles as the paramedics put Dewey into the ambulance.
GALE
I'm coming with you!
REPORTERS
Sidney! Sidney!
JOEL
Sidney, tell us, how does it feel to be a hero?
SIDNEY
Talk to Cotton. He's the hero, he's the one you want to interview.
REPORTERS
Cotton! Cotton!
COTTON
You all will get your story. For there is indeed a place, a time, and a
price. And if you need me, here's my number.
REPORTER
Come on Cotton, tell us something.
COTTON
Well, I'll tell you one thing, it'll make one hell of a movie.
CREDITS START.