HOOLD - Order of Service Handout

The Symbol of the Order

The Holy Order of Our Lady of Debauchery
Order of Service Handout

The Holy Order of Our Lady of Debauchery
of the
Holy Roman Catholic Apostolic Church of An Tir (Inc.)
(Now Known Simply as The Church)
Announces
A Service

This Service will be held Saturday Evening:

For the Ecclesiastically Inclined: approx. Vespers
For the Orientally Inclined: During the Hour of the Rooster
For the Runically inclined: At the Hour of Kano
For the Mariners: At the Start of the Last Dog Watch
For Those Without Clocks: At About Sunset (6PM; ask around)

At the House Known as Grithold
(Look for the Green and Blue Dining Fly).

This Missive contains the Order of Service, which will be necessary so you know what you're saying; it also contains some information about the Order, including how to join, if you are so inclined.

Some Definitions:

Debauch (F. débaucher, fr. OF desbochier to leave work, be idle) . . . --v.i. To indulge excessively in sensual pleasures, esp. eating and drinking.
Debauchery Excessive indulgence of the appetites; sensuality; pl., orgies; carousals.
Carouse (From F., fr. G. garaus all out, in garaus trinken to empty the cup.) 1. obs. a draining of the cup in drinking; also, a drained cup; a toast. 2. A drinking bout; a carousal.
Carousal a jovial feast or festival; a drunken revel; a carouse.
Orgy 1. chiefly pl. Among the Greeks and Romans, secret ceremonial rites in honor of a deity, esp. those of the worship of Dionysus, or Bacchus, characterized by ecstatic singing and dancing, and often by revelry. 2. Drunken revelry; carousal. 3. Excessive indulgence in some activity, as speechmaking.
Revel (OF. reveler to revolt, rebel, make merry, fr. L rebellare . See Rebel) 1. to be festive in a riotous or noisy manner. 2. To take great or intense delight or satisfaction (in). --Syn. Carouse; delight; joy. --n. 1. Merrymaking; carousing; conviviality. 2. A merry or noisy celebration of a feast, wedding, etc.

--From Webster's Collegiate Dictionary, 5th ed., 1941

Debauchery. Anything done deliberately for fun or pleasure, not necessarily good for you.

--The Mother Superior and Grand Inquisitor

(This service is in no way an official part of this event, nor is in any way sanctioned by the SCA, Inc. They probably don't even know about it. For entertainment purposes only. Insert Standard Disclaimer Here. No actual religion is implied or inferred--unless you like the idea, of course. This is a pastiche of many different organized religions, and no malice is meant by it in any way towards any one. If you have any questions, please stop by the Grithold pavilion. We will be glad to answer them.)

(K) The Holy Order of Our Lady of Debauchery, 1998. All Rights Reversed--we'd just appreciate credit.

The Order of Service
for
The Holy Order of Our Lady of Debauchery

Greeting: OK, OK, Settle Down, Let's Get Started.
(P): Pax Nabisco.
(All): Same to You.

Kyrie: Thank You, Lady, for the Fun in our Lives.
(All): Thank You, Lady.
Thanks for All our Hopes and Dreams.
(All): Thank You, Lady.
And Thanks in Advance for the Fun Yet to Be.
(All): Thank You, Lady.
So There.
Gloria in Eggshells Lumbago!
(All): Gloria in Eggsells Lumbago!

Prayer: Let us Pray. (Prayer; gratitude for the event, etc.; general Good Stuff)
(All): So There.

First Psaying: Our First saying is from (Name): (Read Saying)
This is Good Stuff.
(All): Thanks for the Tip.

Second Psaying: Our Second saying is from (Name): (Read Saying)
This is Also Good Stuff.
(All): Thanks for the Tip.

Soap Box:We will now begin the SoapBox. (A short [less that 5 min.] exhortation to a certain point of view, supported by a couple of quotees [maybe even the Psayings] and on a positive topic.) Thus endeth the SoapBox.
(P): Let us Pray. (On the sermon; a summing up and application suggestions for the SoapBox; maybe even a tithe plea.)
(All): So There.

Creed: Let us Now Recite the Creed.
(All): I Believe in God, the Supreme Being,
And in Goddess, who Told Me to Humor Him;

I Believe in Our Lady of Debauchery,
Who was Born when Humans First had Fun Together,
Gains Strength from Every Joke,
and Who will Exist as Long as there is Anyone with Joy in their Heart.
Every Act of Love and Pleasure is a Ritual to Her,
and Every Time I make Someone Smile it is as Incense to Her Nose.

I Believe in the Holy Icon,
the Eighteen Forms of Debauchery,
the Rules,
the Saints,
and Fun in General.
So There.

(P): Let us Pray. (Basic Prayer)

(All): Our Lady of Debauch'ry,
Hallowed Be Thy Fun,
Only When the World is Merry
Will We Stop Getting Thy Works Done.

Give us This Day our Daily Bread,
and Our Dessert, and Time to Play;
To Use our Heart as well as our Head
Please Help Us Each and Every Day.

So Bless Us, Watch Us, Have a Good Laugh
And Remind us that We should be Laughing. Too.
Thank You for Not Needing Horse, Goat, or Calf --
Just Help Us to Do the Best Humans can Do.
So There.

Doxology: Pax Dominos Nabisco.
(All): Same to You.

Communion: We will now Give Out Communion.
(The Priest moves among the worshippers with their Gonzo Pez Dispenser. They will hold it out, say "Play with Gonzo!", and the worhipper takes a Pez and says, "Got Your Tongue!" Hold your Pez until all are distributed. )
(All): (Holding their Pez in the air, looking up) Thank You! ( All eat.)

Blessing: And Now, May Our Lady Bless and Keep You, May the World Cradle You and Feed You Well, and May Murphy Never Know Quite Where You Are.
(All): So There.

Dismissal: The Service is Now Over; Now Go and Worship for Real!
(All): Yay!!
(General Mayhem Ensues.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Safe, Sane, and Consensual.

Anything done under the auspices of the Order must fit at least two of these three ideas -- and the third, consensuality, MUST be one of them.

The Holy Icon : The Icon of the Holy Order of Our Lady of Debauchery is Gonzo the Great, a practitioner of Debauchery to such a great degree that no on really understands Him. If you happen to have a stuffed version of Gonzo you have no use for, we would dearly love to discuss terms with you.

The Eighteen Forms of Debauchery : This is a list of Debauchery in all its forms, from holding Joy in your heart to the strangenesses of Gonzo Himself. The exact form will be based on the Twelve Steps of Humility written by Saint Benedict; it has yet to be completed.

The Rules:

Mundane rules were made to be broken. THESE ARE NOT.
Courtesy, Caution, Discretion, Compassion, and Tact will be militantly enforced. If you have problems understanding any of these terms, ask your superior.
If you start making abusive potshots or start things with malicious intent, open season will be declared - On You.
Any person too toasted for their own good (we decide) will be relocated - to their sleep spot. Alone. (ie, no fun.)
The Mother Superior is Always Right. If she is ever wrong, refer to Rule 5.
There is NO Rule 6!
The Bywords of the Order: Safe ,Sane, and Consensual. 2 out of 3, but 1 Must Be C.
If you don't like it, you don't get any.

And the Obligatory Final Rule:
Membership in the Order leads us to assume that you are a reasonable, mature adult, and you will be treated as such - until you prove us wrong.

The Saints: We in the HOOLD recognize Saints from many different traditions, as well as the period practice of turning god/desses and heroes from other religions into saints for our own. The Order of Service mentions Murphy, the Saint of Things oing Wrong; others include St. Oned, of the Happy Plants, St. Londo the Perpetually Partying, and St. Joshua the Extremely Helpful. Suggestions are always welcome.
How to Join: Most members of the HOOLD can take in new members of a rank lower than the rank they currently possess. The coin of the Church in this endeavor is usually beer. The process is simple: you find a member and ~~bribe~~tithe your way in at whatever price the two of you agree on, give your name and address for the Order's records, and you're in.
Although beer is the coin of the Church, and therefore of the Order, the Mother Superior has been known to take other alcohol as a ~~bribe~~ tithe, as well as other things (candy, cookies, drink of other sorts, etc.)
The Mother Superior and the Grand Inquisitor are happy to discuss the philosophy and practices of the Order; they can be found under their dining fly at almost any time.

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