Title: POV
Author: Madelyn
madelyn184@yahoo.com
Summary: Why did Rory give up a chance to se P. J. Harvey? Why is she
going back on her tentative friendship with Tristan? Read and find out.
Spoilers: Goes up through the season finale, so if you haven’t seen it
you may want to steer clear.
A/N: I just got an idea and ran with it. This is my first fic, so feedback
is appreciated. It only takes a moment, and would make my day. Please
please please let me know what you think about it. This fic also kind of
lays out a groundwork for another fic I'm working on, so look out for a
sequel.
POV - Part 1, Tristan
I don’t know what possessed me to think Rory would just go with me to that
concert. Sure, we had been getting along better. I knew she and that jerk
ex-boyfriend of hers still hadn’t made up. With any luck, I hoped to be
the one to help Rory get over him for good, and I thought that maybe a
concert was the best way to do it.. There was just something in Dean’s
eyes that scared me. I don’t think Rory can see it, or she would have run
for the hills. But I could see it, and I was doing my best to keep her
away from that.
It was hard to find out just what concert tickets to get. I knew Rory wasn’t
quite your conventional girl. She was special. I couldn’t get just any
tickets. They had to be special, something that she would love, and know
that I had gone through some trouble to get. I tried to casually ask around,
but I wasn’t getting anywhere. Finally, I remembered how at Madeline’s party
Rory had brought a friend who was getting cozy with a casual friend of mine,
Henry. I tried the undercover bit with him, too, but I finally resorted to
asking outright. He told me he’d ask Lane, and get back to me.
A few days later he did, and he had a wealth of information. He specified
that Blur, Cheap Trick, and Collective Soul were some of their favorites,
but P. J. Harvey, an all time high, had a concert coming into town in just
a week. Bingo. Calling some concert contacts, I finally got a hold of some
tickets. They were good seats, too. Third row center. I just knew that Rory
was going to flip. I envisioned her throwing her arms around my neck,
babbling madly and thanking me shamelessly. Just for the record, I have also
envisioned myself as holding the rights to Microsoft, along with that $50
billion.
Needless to say, that is not how it turned out. I could have been more
tactful, less arrogant. But I was a bit excited. I couldn’t believe I had
something that was sure to put Rory over the edge. She had been so melancholy
for so long, and she needed something to be happy about. I thought joking
with her would put her at ease. We had developed a tenuous friendship, and
I still wasn’t sure of how to handle it. I obviously chose the wrong tactic.
Still, even with how badly it went, I still thought she would go with me. I
considered it a sure thing. If I had had any doubts, I never would have told
Louis, Madeline, and Paris that I was.
But a few days later, I still hadn’t been able to talk with Rory. She kept
avoiding me, and every time I tried to talk with her, she found reasons to
leave. Call me stubborn, call me optimistic, but I still didn’t believe that
she was trying to avoid me. When I finally cornered her, I was nearly at a
breaking point. My nerves were frazzled, and my coping skills were definitely
not at their optimum. I couldn’t believe she said that she hated me. We had
formed a friendship, and I hadn’t received the memo about it’s demise.
Grabbing her books was childish, but I was at my wits end. I knew that if
she was giving up a chance to see one of her favorite artists in concert,
she was going back to him. My fears were only confirmed when I saw Dean.
He was standing by his truck on the front courtyard. When he saw Rory, his
eyes softened a bit. Then he saw me. I saw a hate in his eyes I had never
seen before. Then I saw him turn those eyes on Rory. He started yelling at
her about something, I wasn’t really listening to the words, just the tone,
and his facial expressions. Rory was crumbling, that much I could see. He
turned to leave, and I heard Rory say the words that chilled my heart to
the core. She had said that she loved him. Dazed, I just lay her books on
the ground , and turned to leave. I knew that I had lost. Deep inside, I
knew that we both had. Dean was bad news, and my heart tightened at the
fact that Rory would be with him all summer, with nothing else to occupy
her time. There would be no way I could help her now. I watched as they
kissed, and I felt my soul tearing in half right before my eyes. There was
nothing more I could do, so I just turned and left.
I wonder if Lane and Henry like P. J. Harvey.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
POV - Part 2, Rory
I remember when I was little, sometimes for my bedtime story my mom would
tell me about her past dating experience. Other than stories about my dad,
my favorite was the story of her first love, Scott James. She told me how
it was magical, special, indescribable, and all those other wonderful
adjectives that I won’t go into now. The romance had been short, but it
had left a lasting impression on her. Mom also told me how no other love
was like your first love. There was a magic that you only got the first
time around. For me, that magic was Dean.
He was the first boy to really pay attention to me as dating material. I
was flattered, really. He was sweet, and cute, and seemed perfect. He
remembered our three-month anniversary when I didn’t even know about it for
goodness sakes! That night was so painful for me. Dean looked into my eyes,
and told me he loved me. I had not clue of how to react. But I knew that I
could not say that I loved him. I didn’t love him like that. That was the
plain and simple truth. The look on his face wrenched at my heart, and I
knew that things could never be the same again.
So, even though I knew I would never feel about Dean the way he obviously
feels about me, I made up my mind to get him back. Love was something
uncharted for me, and being my logical self, I decided to go with a sure
thing rather than take a chance with Tristan. But, in my heart, I know it
wouldn’t be a chance. I knew that Tristan was right for me.
The night Tristan kissed me, I felt something. It coursed through my body
like electricity and made me feel light, something that Dean had never made
me feel. In that instant I knew what I wanted. And it scared me. All my life,
I had wished for someone to love me with all their heart and to love someone
with all of mine, and with one kiss I knew that Tristan was it. I was
terrified. Dean was never that serious. He was almost like a toy, like
someone I could practice on. All I knew was that, even if I didn’t love him,
he was my first boyfriend, and in that was a magic that I desperately wanted
to recapture, a magic that was at least familiar, even if it wasn’t the best
I could have. And in order to get that magic back, I couldn’t be with Tristan.
So I ran and I dashed any hopes of us becoming more than friends. All for the
sake of not having the possibility of having my heart stomped on by someone
I knew I could love, if I gave it a chance.
After a few weeks, thing with Dean still hadn’t improved, and somehow in my
sick little mind I thought that even just being friends with Tristan was
keeping me from Dean. Unfortunately, that decision came when Tristan asked me
to go to the concert. Now, I don’t know how he came to know how I loved P. J.
Harvey, but I knew that if I went, I wouldn’t be able to hold out any longer.
I had to hold out, or I ran the risk of trying something so new and scary that
it made me dizzy just thinking about it. So I made myself say those horrible
things to him. I made myself use that summer of drama camp I had taken when I
was ten. And I made myself watch his eyes fill with pain while I kept mine full
of hate. At that point, I was capable of anything. I had impersonated Girl
Scout in my quest to keep things from changing. If that isn’t a reason to be
committed to a mental hospital, I don’t know what is.
Imagine my dilemma when Tristan confronted me about the concert. Up until that
point I had been able to avoid him. But I was virtually cornered. I felt a
spark when he grabbed my books, and was so close to admitting my feelings for
him. But I just reminded myself of the pain that I could feel, and I knew I
had to get out of there. I went out of the hallway and out to the courtyard,
and then I saw him.
I couldn’t believe he was there. My heart jumped into my throat, and I knew
that it was most likely my last chance to get Dean back. I ran over to him, and
I watched his eyes fill with emotion akin to pain, and I turned to see Tristan,
with my books still in his hands. I rushed to reassure Dean, but it was almost
to no avail. No line of reasoning was working. So I did the only thing I knew
would work. I said five small words that lit his eyes with disbelief mingled
with joy. And I knew that while his heart was soaring, another was breaking.
Still, I had made my decision. The distance between Dean and myself closed,
and he locked me in passionate kiss. I was surprised when the kiss didn’t give
me the fireworks they used to, but it was still a kiss from someone that loved
me.
I can make myself love him, but can I kill my love for another?
END
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