Prologue:
Now Why would we say it’s a
“humorous” Bio? Well, first of all,
that’s to let you know that the Druid
is for the most part a very private
person and shares Very little with
those he does not know. So we
don’t want you to get offended
when you read this and realize that
there’s actually very little here other
than a few tidbits that we were
actually able to squeeze out of
him after lots of prodding, back
massages and cookie bribes
(yes, he’s very fond of cookies)
But as you peruse the website
You’ll realize that if you come
back enough he may actually
let you into the more secluded
parts of his home on the net.
Okay…..well, here ya go. We
hope you appreciate our untiring
efforts To find out what we could
about him…..Enjoy!

Name: Zachaeria Tan’Ru
(We were actually surprised he
answered this one)

Address:
(we got a look like we were on
bad drugs)

Telephone number:
(please upgrade that look to a
complete frown)

Age: 4058 Years old
(We were actually hoping to
get his age in THIS lifetime)

Birthplace:
(Please re-insert “bad-drugs”
look again)

Birth Sign:
(He asked us to guess…..we gave up)

Heritage: Basque-Spaniard
/Aseraat-Celtic

Hair Color: Kinda sorta brownish
(sigh, yeah yeah we know……)

Height: 5’7” to 5’9”
Depending on mood
(Well, that’s what he said!)

Weight: 165 Pounds
(Rumored to be proud of losing
75 pounds on this diet we keep
waiting to read about)

Pets: One-Cute-Old-Adorable-
Obnoxious-Stinky Basset Hound
named “Droopy”

Political Affiliation:
(We actually got yelled at when asking
this, but he did say something about
being a *&%$#@!!! Liberal so we’ll
just go with that)

Marital Status:
(All he did was hang his head and
mumble something about “Why do
they keep asking me this…..”)

Spiritual beliefs: Aseraatic Druid-
Eclectic Pagan

Occupation: Philanthropist,
Entrepreneur , Consultant
(Vague? did we hear Vague?)

Education: School of Hard Knocks,
Institute for the Betterment of Stubborn
Druids, University Of Tampa-Classical
Music Major, St Petersburg Junior
College-Finance and Business Major,
Masters School of Bartending
-Mixology Degree (yeah, He can
hang with the best of them)

Hobbies/Talents: Musician-26 years,
Artist-20+ years, Composer-10 years,
Skindiving, water Skiing, cave exploring,
camping, fishing, writing, riding Motorcycles.
(we stopped him here…he’s a bit long winded)

Favorite food: Southern French

Favorite Music: Celtic /Industrial Synth

Favorite Movie: 13th warrior

Favorite TV Show:
(We got yelled at again, all we understood
is something about a $%#@*&!!!
idiot box, so we figure he doesn’t watch
much television)

Favorite Charity: NAACP
(National Association for the
Advancement of Celtic Peoples…..well, that’s what he said!)

Favorite Color: Violet

Social Affiliations:
(We keep getting that look…..)

Fraternal Affiliations:
(This is getting redundant….)

Well people, after much debate,
we have given up
on any more questions to the Druid.
We learned that if you
want any information from him,
never wake him up and ask
him things like this until AFTER
he’s had at the very least,
two pots of coffee.

We’re going to go get some coffee
and Tylenol now
……………Have a nice day……..