THE PLAYERS:
Glenn
Nick
Shelby (AKA Julianne)(AKA Stupid Whore)

I took a long, hard look at my lover,
and realized just how passionately I
had managed to eliminate those wind ducks. Man,
between the guillotine and the A-K47s, those ducks were
soooo dead. But there had to be a better way to slaughter poultry. Picking bullets out of
one's teeth was not a pleasant way to enjoy one's meal. suddenly, I remmbered that
I had a date with Paul that night. I
decided to go to him after all. I knew
that as soon as I did, he would figure out about the horrible
herpes contraction. So I hid in the buches, until he reappeared.
I thought back to the LAST time I was hiding in the bushes. Then it had been with Paul. We
had some hot ass-sex. Yep, hot ass-sex indeed. ut this time I was there for an entirely different
kind of hot sex. I decided to go to Room B, where
I could find someone who could finally quench my
thirst for death. "Death," I said, "where are you?"
"I'm nowhere, I'm an abstract concept," Death replied.
"No!" I screamed. "You lie!" Death sighed. "You're right. My name is Bill, and I'm
on my way to a costume party." Then he touched me and I dropped dead... or so I thought.
I took his pulse -- he was alive, but barely.
I had to get him to a hospital -- or holistic care center.
On the way, I accidentally ran over Mrs. Tausig. I
summoned the Goddess of Moronickness, who immediately
was insulted by me. "You mroon! Moronickness isn't even a word!" "Duh! You think
I like this job?" she asked, rolling her eyes. "No. I pissed off Jupiter and got stuck doing this."
"DIE!!" I screamed, as I lunged at her
with the pickax hidden in my coat "You've
chopped off the heads of all 25 angry protesters!
You stupid whore!" I exclaimed. Suddenly, the CIA S.W.A.T. team
burst into that room and arrested me for addressing someone other than Julianne as "You
stupid whore." So they took me away and executed me. The End.