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The GOB'S First Millennium CelebrationApparently some of GOB were about during the 1001AD Millennium celebrations (doesn't surprise me...). Recent archaelogical digs have uncovered this lewd peice of 11th century poetry. The gamers went on to the club, And gleefully their hands did rub, In expectation of revel-ree, For it was hour known as happ-ee. Great bottles of wine did they quaff, And all of them began to laugh, Until drunkenness held full dom-in-ion, For it was two for the price of one. Yet after wine, and ale and mead, Man must have a mighty feed. Great pasties from Corn-wall, Scottish eggs, round, like a ball. Great hams, quail, duck and geese, They suck the bones and drank the grease, (one fellow stood pale and wan, for he was vegetary-on). Yet, man knoweth that glutton-ee, Stoketh the fire of letchor-ee. Upon three wenches round and sly, The fellows cast a wanton eye. One did approacheth wink a drunken wink, "ello darlin', wanna drink?" soon they pulled them on their knees, it was like some gruesome puppet-ree. Such was the lewdness and debauchery, It was like a sketch by Dick Emer-ee. - Except Dick Emer-ee was not yet born,< So no comparison could be drawn. But when the fellows began to pale, (for quale, art not, the friend of ale) and in their bellies much confusion, from their throats a vile extrusion. Stinking foul corruption Came spilling forth from drooling lips. The fetid stench did fill the pub, Twas the very arse of Be-el-ze-bub. Thrown they were, from the "Boar and Trumpet", In the street, no coin, no strumpet. Homeward bound must quickly go, To that end, a donkey stole. Their hands, art with the vomit greased, The donkey, he was not best pleased, And threw them into a ditch of shite. They all agreed, "what a brilliant night!!!". |