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The World Pygmy Tickling Championshipby Paul HooperThe finals of the championship saw teams from the Guards, the Lancers, the Heavy Cavalry and a team representing the Rest of the World. Although teams were due from France and also the Hussars they failed to make the championship. Reports that the Hussars had been involved in a brawl with the French and had been imprisoned by the French Police were dismissed as pure speculation. When the first round got underway the inexperience of the Rest of the World team became apparent with their total score of five rumps putting them firmly in 3rd place. Yet the elite of the British army the Guards team did little better with a total of six Rumps for 2nd place, the overall leaders at the end of the first round were the Lancers with eleven rumps. The individual leader was Mark Indigo of 21st Lancers The intervention of some nananarchists during the second round was quickly suppressed and the round produced quite a few surprises with both the Guards and Lancers scoring 11 rumps and the Heavy Cavalry overtaking the Rest of the world and thus taking third place. Individual winners for this round were Dennis Urhart of the Grenadier Guards, Jon Fletcher of the Coldstream Guards and Stevens of the Scots Greys. But the overall Individual leaders were Merri Wellesley and Mark Indigo with 7 rumps each. The third round saw the Guards scoring a miserable four rumps and the Heavy cavalry score a magnificent eleven rumps bringing both teams to 21 rumps each. But the Lancers scored 9 rumps to bring their total to 31. Yet Rest of the World managed to score the best of the round with 12 Rumps bringing them to a total of 18. Individual round winners were Graham Davenport of 2nd Dragoon Guards, Louis Erricson III, Niki Reynolds of the Blues and Phil Von Tannanbaum of the Prussian Lancers. The final round saw the Guards score another 11 rumps, the Lancers 13 rumps, Heavy Cavalry 12 rumps and the rest of the world a lowly 5 rumps. The final results are shown in the table below
The individual results are shown on the next page but Dennis Urhart after a shaky start managed to score a magnificent score of 15 rumps with Mark 1 just one point behind.
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