Don't Let Go
-a work of YYH fan fiction

Part 1
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"KURAMAAA!!!"

Hiei's eyes widened in horror as he saw his lover throw himself 
forward, taking the blow that was meant for him.

"NOOOO!!!" He screamed, gritting his teeth in pain as he tried to 
struggle to his feet.  Anguish gripped him as he watched Kurama's frail 
human body falter against the surge of raw power.  Tears began 
streaming down his face, all the tears he'd never allowed himself to 
shed, crystallizing and falling unnoticed to the ground.



Kurama threw back his head and met Hiei's stricken gaze.  His beautiful 
emerald eyes were glazed with pain, but even so, the youko's gaze was 
steady and filled with love.  His lips formed a silent whisper.

"Aishiteru...itooshii..."



Hiei staggered up, desperation spurring him on.  

<...I can't lose you....>  

He lurched forward and stumbled, his injured leg balking, nearly 
falling back to his knees.  



He stretched out a trembling hand, reaching for his lover, the other 
half of himself.  Kurama met him halfway, their hands touching and 
clasping for one heartbreaking moment, before a blinding light flared 
around Kurama's body.

Hiei felt Kurama's hold loosen, his hand becoming insubstantial, and 
tightened his own grip.  



He saw Kurama close his eyes



and disappear.



"KURAMAAAA!!!"

Hiei collapsed, red eyes dull, uncaring of the youkai coming towards 
him.  His insides ached, that part of himself that Kurama had filled 
with his love throbbed with painful emptiness.  Kurama was GONE; he had 
nothing left to live for.

Shouts and running footsteps, a bellow of surprise and pain.



Hiei couldn't even make himself feel angry at their tardiness.

"Rei Gun!"
"Rei Ken!"

Hiei wrapped his arms tightly about himself, tuning out the sounds of 
the battle raging around him.  Kurama was GONE.  He bent his head and 
let out a keening cry of loss.

* * * * *

A tall, slim form detached itself from the shadows beneath the trees.  
Gleaming violet eyes watched the little youkai with malicious 
enjoyment.



It unconsciously tightened its hold on the small bundle it carried.  It 
squirmed in protest.  The figure turned its attention towards its 
burden, and smiled.



* * * * *

Yuusuke cast a troubled look at Hiei.  His friend was too quiet, too 
still.  All traces of the snarling, bad-tempered youkai he'd gotten 
used to had disappeared.  Hiei just lay curled up beneath a tree, 
staring through Kuwabara, ignoring everything the red-haired young man 
was doing.  Yuusuke remembered looking into the youkai's eyes and 
shuddered.  Those red orbs had been lifeless and empty; it was like 
looking into a hollowed shell.  Nobody had been home. 



Kuwabara finally gave up trying to get through to Hiei.  With a muffled 
oath, he surged to his feet and walked over to Yuusuke.

"K'so, he won't snap out of it!" Kuwabara growled, stuffing his hands 
into his pockets and glaring at the ground.  "Shit!  I still can't 
believe Kurama's dead."

"We should've gotten here sooner."  Yuusuke kicked a small stone, 
sending it flying into the surrounding trees.  "Dammit!   We never 
should've separated."



Yuusuke looked back at Hiei.  He hadn't moved; he was still lying 
there, eyes blankly staring at nothing at all.  Yuusuke whipped his 
head around.  He couldn't bear to look at his friend's condition.



Eyes burning, he stumbled into the woods, shaking off Kuwabara's 
concerned hands.  He needed to be alone, to come to terms with his 
guilt and grief.



* * * * *

Kuwabara stared after Yuusuke, watching as the smaller man lost himself 
in the woods around them.  His hands clenched into fists at his side.  
This shouldn't have happened, _none_ of this should've happened.  God, 
they'd only been up against a few A-class youkai.  It should've been 
just a routine job.  How could things have gone so drastically wrong? 



He swiped the tears from his eyes.  He couldn't believe that his friend 
was truly gone.  Kurama had always been such a good fighter, always so 
careful.  Shit, he'd always expected that _he'd_ be the first to fall.	
Turning around, Kuwabara cast a brooding eye at the fallen fire demon. 
The relationship between the two had never been what people would call 
friendly.  

  



He stared at Hiei; the youkai looked awful.  He seemed more than 
half-dead himself, lying there, not moving at all.  Bending down, 
Kuwabara scooped him up into his arms.  Small black pearls fell from 
Hiei's clothing, coming to rest with the others already on the ground.



Another pearl rolled down Hiei's chest.  Kuwabara involuntarily caught 
it in his fist.

< _TEAR GEMS?!_  But he's not a koorime...>

<_Is_ he?>

Deeply disturbed, Kuwabara looked at the small youkai he carried.  
Hiei's head had fallen back, hanging limply against him, bringing his 
face into stark relief.  

Kuwabara stared deep into those empty eyes...

* * * * *

He was lost in a sea of loneliness and pain.  Rage and despair such as 
he had never felt before battered at his unprotected mind.  Kuwabara 
screamed, his voice blending with the wailing of the wind. 
Desperately, he put up a kekkai around himself, blocking the painful 
sensations washing over him.  As the attack abruptly ceased, he opened 
his eyes and looked around.  He was floating in a blackness so deep he 
thought, for one panicked moment, that he'd been struck blind.  
Gradually, he began to notice a faint light illuminating a region 
before him.  He moved closer, and the scene resolved itself into a 
lifeless wilderness of ice.  Deep in the center of the barren 
wasteland, he could see a small figure huddled on the ground.  Its arms 
were wrapped around itself and its head was flung back, mouth open, 
howling its grief.

<_Hiei?!_>

* * * * *

Kuwabara tore his gaze from the youkai's, shaking off the vision he'd 
just had.  He realized with a start that he was breathing hard, almost 
as if he'd been running for miles.

 

He stared at Hiei in shock.



Moving quickly, Kuwabara ran through the woods, heading for Genkai's 
temple and the young koorime living there.  His little trip into Hiei's 
mind had made a few things perfectly clear to him.  Hiei had _more_ 
than returned Kurama's feelings, and if _he_ didn't get help soon, the 
youkai would follow Kurama in death.  



* * * * *

Yukina sat on the futon, Hiei's head resting on her lap, her brow 
creased with worry.  She'd always known, deep inside, that this young 
demon was her brother.  Though he often denied it, he couldn't conceal 
the concern he'd always felt for her welfare.  She'd felt hope that one 
day, he would acknowledge her as his sister.  But now...  

She stroked his hair, softly crooning his name, trying to call him 
back.  She'd been shocked at his condition when Kuwabara had brought 
him in, at a loss to diagnose his illness, until she'd heard about 
Kurama's death.  Then everything became painfully clear.  



She gently covered him with a light blanket and pulled him closer. 
She'd been able to heal her brother's physical wounds, but she knew of 
nothing that could heal his heart.   A tear slid down her cheek, 
instantly forming into a priceless jewel.  As Yukina snuggled closer to 
her brother, the hiruiseki fell unnoticed to the floor.

* * * * *

Kuwabara bit his lip in frustration, watching the little koorime cradle 
her comatose twin.  Yukina hadn't been able to rouse Hiei, and he 
couldn't think of anything else to try.  Screwing his eyes shut, he 
began to pound his fist against the wall.

A commotion outside the temple pierced his thoughts.  Turning around, 
he saw Koenma striding in, Botan and Yuusuke following at his heels.

"What're you doing here Koenma?" he asked belligerently.  "Hiei's not 
dead yet."

Koenma winced.  "I know."

Kuwabara felt faintly ashamed at his surliness.  He _knew_ Koenma cared 
about the youkai too.   Looking down at the floor, he mumbled an 
apology.

"It's alright, Kuwabara-kun.  I understand."  He sighed heavily.  
"Anyway, that's not the reason I came here."

"So why did you come?" Yuusuke asked quietly.

Koenma looked at him gravely.  Worry clouded his brown eyes.  "Kurama's 
soul is missing."



Kuwabara stared at the young demi-god in shock.

"How could that have happened?!" Yuusuke demanded.

Botan burst into tears.  "I don't know!" she sobbed, looking miserable. 
"I didn't want to, but I came to lead him away, but then," she sniffed 
loudly. "his soul just wasn't _there_!"

"But where could it have gone?" Kuwabara asked, confused.  "He couldn't 
have reincarnated so quickly...." He looked around at his friends. 
"_Could_ he?"  

Koenma chewed on his pacifier, thinking furiously.  "He _has_ done it 
before...But that just doesn't _seem_ right somehow," he continued 
unhappily.  "I feel like we're missing something..."

"I just don't know _what_..."

* * * * *

"...Kurama's soul is missing..."

The words whirled through the icy wastes in Hiei's mind.  The weeping 
figure slowly lifted its head.

"...reincarnated..."

"...done it before..."

Hope began to thaw the ice surrounding the fire demon's heart.  Green 
and black flames melted the icy landscape.



The small figure rose to his feet.



* * * * *

"Oniisan!"

All heads whirled around at Yukina's glad cry.  Hiei's eyes fluttered 
open, a confused frown creasing his brow before he recognized his 
whereabouts.  He spared a fleeting moment to wonder how Yukina had 
discovered his true identity, then shrugged it off as being 
insignificant at the moment.  He had more pressing matters to attend 
to.  He quickly sat up, his eyes seeking and locking onto Koenma's.  

The young god was shocked at the anguished hope that flared in those 
crimson depths.

"Is it possible?" Hiei demanded, gripping the edges of the blanket 
tightly to conceal his trembling hands.  " _Could_ Kurama still be 
alive?"  

Koenma fidgeted under that searing gaze.  "It's possible that he could 
have reincarnated.  But..."

Hiei grew dangerously still.  "_But?_"

Koenma stared down at his feet.  "Something just doesn't feel right 
about this whole mess."

Kuwabara scratched at his head.  "What, like someone planned it or 
something?"

Yuusuke's eyes widened in sudden realization.  "That would explain why 
those youkai split up like that.  They were just _distracting_ us, to 
get us away from Kurama!  Dammit!  I can't believe I fell for it!"

Hiei threw off the blanket covering him, reaching for his sword.

"Oniisan, you need to rest!  Please don't get up yet," Yukina pleaded.

Hiei looked down at her, his red eyes softening for one infinitesimal 
second.  He was inordinately glad  that she still cared for him, even 
knowing that he'd lied to her about who he was.  "I _have_ to find him, 
Yukina," he said quietly, emotion roughening his voice.   "He is my 
life."

Straightening up, he wrapped his cloak about him and buckled on his
sword.  In a flicker of black wind, he was gone.

* * * * *

Hiei dropped down into the little woodland clearing, steeling himself 
against the memories of the morning's disaster.  Ripping off the strip 
of cloth covering his Jagan, he began scouring the area, looking for 
any sign that Kurama had survived.  

After hours of fruitless searching, he detected faint traces of a 
strangely familiar youki behind one of the trees surrounding the battle 
site.



A prickle of uneasiness traveled down his spine.  He shook his head, 
trying to shrug it off, and caught sight of a few wispy strands of red 
hair tangled in the bushes underneath the tree.  He reached out for 
them with a trembling hand.  Kurama's essence, so achingly familiar, 
washed over him.  Clenching his fist tightly around the strands, he 
closed his eyes and shuddered convulsively.  



Grimly, Hiei re-warded his Jagan.  Casting one last anguished look at 
the clearing, he took off, heading back to Genkai's temple.  



* * * * *

Yukina raised her head, turning to face the entrance of the temple.
"Oniisan's coming back!" she cried excitedly, putting down her tea cup. 
 
The others followed suit, setting down their cups and waiting 
expectantly for Hiei to arrive.  They didn't have to wait long.  The 
youkai flickered into view, clutching something in his small hand.  

Yukina ran to his side.

"Oniisan, did you find him?" she asked, lightly touching his arm.

Hiei's clenched fist tightened imperceptively, before he slowly shook 
his head.  

Yuusuke's shoulders slumped dejectedly, and Botan hid her face in her 
hands.  Koenma gently stroked her hair, offering what comfort he could.

Hiei opened his hand.  "This was all I could find."

Yukina peered into his open palm.  Inside, she saw a few wispy strands 
of red hair.  After looking to her twin for permission, she picked one 
up and studied it.  She gave a little gasp of surprise.

"What is it, Yukina-san?" Kuwabara asked her worriedly.

She raised her stunned gaze.  "This is Kurama-kun's..."

"And?" he prompted.

"But it's _baby_ hair."

Kuwabara gave a relieved smile.  "Then he must've reincarnated like we 
thought."

Yukina shook her head.  "You don't understand, Kazuma-san."

"Huh?"

"This is _Minamino Shuuichi's_ hair."

"But his body died...didn't it?"

Hiei closed his hand protectively around the silky strands.  "I guess 
not."

"If  Kurama's been turned into a baby again..." Yuusuke began.

Hiei looked at him.  "He'll be vulnerable."

"_Shimatta!_"




	
	

	

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