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Gordonoz Pelican Theatre Charleston Fever Music and Lyrics The Book of Bears The Gribbin Zoo |
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THE MUSIC |
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SAD BUT TRUE |
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SCIT SCATTIN' THE CHARLESTON |
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CHARLESTON FEVER |
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You Are Respected - Duet |
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MAYBE |
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Two Can Live As Cheaply As One |
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I WONDER |
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KEEP YOURSELF NICE |
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THE LYRICS |
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Click for the music |
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| CHARLESTON FEVER |
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| We got the Charleston |
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| We got the Charleston |
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| We got the Charleston Fever |
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| We do the Charleston |
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| That's right, the Charleston |
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| We do it night and day____ |
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| It's just the best beat to dance to |
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| Then to go home and romance to |
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| There ain't no beat that can |
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| Beat it, no dance can defeat it. |
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| So beat that beat, baby. |
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| Give us the Charleston |
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| Toe-tapping Charleston |
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| Give us the Charleston thrill. |
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| We don't need tangos, |
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| Mambos, Fandangos |
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| We got the Charleston Fever. |
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Click for the music |
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| I WONDER |
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| Where are the kisses that used to be mine? |
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| Where have they gone, I wonder. |
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| Where is the romance, the passion divine |
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| The love that was bitter-sweet, I wonder. |
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| In my heart I live an endless Summer |
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| Holding hands beneath a sunny sky. |
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Yet I know that the season's over |
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Why does time pass us by, I wonder. |
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If someone offered their heart to me now |
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| Would I accept, I wonder. |
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| If someone offered to cherish and protect me |
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| Would I reject him, I wonder. |
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Click for the music |
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| SAD BUT TRUE |
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| It's sad that Summer has to end |
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| That broken hearts may never mend |
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| That hope, now high, may soon descend |
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It's sad, sad but true. |
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| I know that what I have is good |
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| I love my family as I should |
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| And yet I'd change it if I could. |
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| It's sad, sad but true. |
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| Ev'rything I have |
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| Ev'rything I love |
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| Tells me I am sitting in clover |
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Yet when I look hard at my dreams |
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I know that dream-time's over. |
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It's sad that dreamers have to wake |
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That suppleness gives way to ache |
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That fragile hopes will always break |
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It's sad, sad but true. |
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| KEEP YOURSELF NICE |
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Click for the music |
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| It's nice to be nice, |
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| Nice and polite. |
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| Good manners are good when you're doing things right. |
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| There are no excuses for social abuses, |
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| So keep, keep yourself nice. |
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| You don't have to be |
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| Experienced as we |
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| To know you are judged by what others may see. |
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| Though you are maturing, |
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| Please don't be impure. In |
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| A word: keep your-self nice. |
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| Gladys |
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| There have been times when I have held a partner in my arms |
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| As we have tangoed cheek to cheek. |
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| I've had a savage impulse to surrender to his charms, |
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And felt my knees go weak. |
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But here in-side my head a little voice has said |
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I have my reputation to uphold, |
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And I have cooled my passion in a ladylike fashion |
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And put my lust on hold. |
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It's nice to be nice, |
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Nice and polite. |
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| Good manners are good when you're doing things right. |
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| There are no excuses for social abuses, |
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| so keep, keep yourself nice. |
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Agnes |
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| You don't have to swear |
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| Or tear out your hair; |
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| Say `Bother! My Goodness! Oh dear!' And `There there!' |
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| My humble advice is: |
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| Stay calm in a crisis |
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| And keep, keep yourself nice. |
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Agnes |
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| I've had my moments, I won't deny I have, |
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| Times when my blood has run hot. |
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| But I have remembered my mother's dying words |
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| And changed `I will' to `I will not!' |
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| She said: `Agnes, dear, I want you to say |
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| That you will keep your-self nice.' |
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| I tried to be, vied to be awfully good, |
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| And only disgraced myself twice. |
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It's nice to be nice, |
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| Nice and polite. |
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| Good manners are good when you're doing things right. |
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| There are no excuses for social abuses, |
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| So keep, keep yourself nice. |
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Gladys |
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Beware of strong drink |
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| It makes your breath stink, |
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| And moral decorum goes straight down the sink. |
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| It's socially reckless |
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| To get yourself legless |
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| So keep, keep yourself nice. |
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| It's nice to be nice, |
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| Nice and polite. |
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| Good manners are good when you're doing things right. |
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| There are no excuses for social abuses, |
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| So keep, keep yourself |
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| Please keep yourself, Do keep yourself nice. |
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| SCIT SCATTIN' THE CHARLESTON |
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Click for the music |
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| Scit-scattin' the Charleston |
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| Tip-tappin' the Charleston |
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Voh voh-de-oh |
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| Shoop shoopy doop |
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| Doop. Keep jazzin' |
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| Doop-dooping the Charleston |
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| Tut tut tooting the Charleston |
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Shuddy Yup |
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Scuddy Yup |
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| Scooby dooby do day. |
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| It don't have to make no sense |
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| So scat out that rhythm. |
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| Forget about the moon and June |
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| And Dum diddie doo |
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Diddee deediddum. |
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| Hum humming the Charleston |
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| Dum dumming the Charleston |
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| Woe woedie |
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| Guh guh goadie |
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| Cush cush cushy oh vay. |
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Two can live as cheaply as one,
Splitting the pences,
Sharing expenses;
One warm bed is hot enough for two.
(You bet your life it is!)
Two can walk as cheaply as one,
Walking together,
Sharing the weather;
One wet shower is wet enough for two.
It only takes one pot
To cook a stew in.
It only takes one cot
To cuddle up to you in.
Two can love as cheaply as one.
What can compare with
Sharing a chair with
One who shares his/her life with you?
[Dance]
It only takes one tub
To do the washin
It only takes on pub
To get completely sloshed in.
Two can dream as cheaply as one.
Dreaming about you.
Can't dream without you.
Dreaming that my dreams come...
Making all your dreams come ...
Dreaming that our dreams come true. |
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TWO CAN LIVE AS CHEAPLY AS ONE |
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Click for the music |
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YOU ARE RESPECTED - DUET
Agnes
You are respected
You are a mother-figure
It's unexpected
But it is true.
[Edie joins in with harmony]
In your deportment
You set a good example
Gifts so important
Are granted to few.
[Agnes repeats above Edie adds countermelody 1]]
Half a mo. Wait a tic.
Who does she think she's kiddin'?
Does she think that I believe this bullshine?
Does she think I've somethin' missin'?
Take a break. Give us a rest.
Put a cork in your gob.
If you think you can get me to do a favour
Then you're clearly not the full two bob.
Agnes Listen here Edie You mean me?
Get this clear I'm all ears.
It's about time you Lady Muck is speakin'
earned your keep.
Tell that tart You're the one who's full badness,
To depart Agnes!
Tell that slut Don't you use that word with
To move her butt Lulu.
And while you're at it
Have a Word Where the hell
With that turd Does she get off?
Who imagines that She imagines she's a toff
He's a gigolo
Tell him that he ought I don't have to take the
To put himself out slightest bit of notice
With the garbage and so
Get his skinny bottom Get your fat bottom
Out of here. Out of here.
Agnes: [Spoken] I'm warning you. If that tart keeps seeing my Keith I'll have you slung out of this factory and all your stale and mouldy sandwiches with you.
Edie: You're just jealous because you can't make your husband as happy as I used to make him.
Agnes: That may be so. But I'm the one with the money and the house. And I don't have to play the tart.
Edie: Maybe you ought to try it. If you're up to it.
Agnes: [Singing] Half a mo. Wait a tic Edie:I was romantic
Who does she think she's kidding? I made your husband happy
Does she think that I believe this bullshine? I was fantastic
Does she think I've something missing? I made him smile.
Take a break. Give us a rest. He would adore me
Put a cork in your gob. Laid all his love before me
If you think that I'll admit you
Have a claim to him I was his first love
You're not the full two bob First by a mile.
Agnes Listen here Edie You mean me?
Get this clear I'm all ears.
It's about time you Lady Muck is speakin'
earned your keep.
Tell that tart You're the one who's full of badness
Agnes!
Tell that slut Don't you use that word with
To move her butt Lulu.
And while you're at it
Have a Word Where the hell
With that turd Does she get off?
Who imagines that She imagines she's a toff
He's a gigolo
Tell him that he ought I don't have to take the
To put himself out slightest bit of notice
With the garbage and so
Get his skinny bottom Get your fat bottom
Out of here. Out of here.
Get his skinny bottom Get your fat bottom
Out of here Out of here
Both I don't mean maybe
Keep that fat/skinny bottom out of here. |
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Click for the music |
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MAYBE |
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Click For The Music |
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