apmoments

Appreciate the moments

This past week, armed with a checkbook and a list that rivaled "War and Peace," my son and I went back to school shopping. While he was attempting to maneuver a sea of pencils, paper, notebooks, folders, binders, crayons, knapsacks, pencil boxes, and rulers for just the perfect pen, I accidentally bumped into another shopper. When I turned to offer an apology, I couldn't help but sympathize with the exasperated man, looking completely out of his element in the madhouse of the stationary aisle. Clutched in one hand was a scribbled list while his other hand grasped the tiny hand of a girl who could not be more than 5 years old. She seemed on the verge of tears and she instinctively pressed against the man's leg as the crowd surged around them. I heard the man say in a tired voice, "I haven't seen a Pokemon lunchbox, honey... how about a blue one?" This caused a new flood of tears as huge green eyes looked up at him. A quivering voice whispered with a sigh, "Ok, Daddy... blue is good too." She lowered her eyes and I could see her tiny body struggling to hold back the tears.

My heart went out to the man. Perhaps only other parents can empathize, knowing the ache you feel when you want nothing more than to give your child that which she desires and the frustrating helplessness felt when you discover that is not always possible.

Well, I'd noticed a Pokemon lunch box in the last aisle that someone had shoved on a shelf behind some candy. I quickly ducked around into that aisle, praying that the lunchbox was still where I'd seen it. As luck would have it, it was.

I returned as the man was reaching for a blue lunchbox on the shelf and slipped the one I'd found along side his hand. He looked at me with a measure of surprise, which quickly turned to relief and as I smiled, he mouthed a silent, "Thank you."

I saw them once more as we were leaving. His hearty laughter rang out as they loaded their bags into the car, and her tears were forgotten as she cradled a Pokemon lunchbox to her with a smile that could light up the world.

This was a moment. Life is full of such moments. Strangers whose paths cross, sharing a smile or a laugh, a short conversation or simply a look that conveys empathy. Moments when one human heart reaches out and touches another. Sometimes merely a wordless meeting of eyes that says, "You are not alone."

Sometimes those moments can be profound and cause you to see things from a new perspective, one never before considered. Sometimes, they can inspire you to action. And sometimes, they can just remind you that in this fast-paced world, there is nothing so rewarding as the smile of a child. Whether life-altering or simple, these moments are each a part of our own individual human experience and should be appreciated.

There are those here who seem to be of the opinion that unless a relationship holds the potential to extend to offline interaction that it is "not serious" and has no value. I can't help but wonder if those who hold this sanctimonious view disect every encounter in their lives this way. Do you look at each person you meet, gauging whether the relationship will grow to something else? Are you so busy measuring the possible future merits that you ignore the present? If you can't touch them, are they not real? I do a great amount of work online, I have many clients whom I have never once seen face to face. Our contact consists of faxes and emails or regular mail and I can tell you this, their money is just as real in my bank account as the clients I see in my office.

Not everyone has the luxury of discovering Gor at the perfect time in their life. Not every person finds Gor when they are single, childless, and free from familial obligations. Even those who are, may not be in a financial position to drop everything and move across the country (or the world) to fullfill their desires. I believe that we find things when we need them most, rather than when we believe we are ready for them. There are many here who have formed relationships, whether friendships or Master/slave bonds, who have never once looked each other in the eyes. So long as they are honest with themselves and others about their expectations, who is to say that what passes between them is not just as (or sometimes more) profound as those who have the luxury of physical proximity?

One thing which has always impressed me about Norman's Gorean people is their zest for living. The passion that inspires them to extract every ounce of joy they can out of every moment of the day. To limit oneself to only those who promise offline meetings is to deprive oneself of the priceless gift that one human spirit can bring to another. To me, that's nothing less than superficial and shallow. Allow yourself to experience fully every person who strikes a chord within you, whether that is face to face or keyboard to keyboard.

It is often said that Gor is a journey into the self. Regardless of the circumstances, any encounter that causes one to look a little deeper into their own soul is of tremendous value and should not be discounted.

To those of you who *only* wish to deal with people who will promise to meet you offline..... try the pickup bar... you'll find plenty of company

I wish you well,

Dangrus