I Chose Not To
I chose not to smile,
I chose not to care,
I chose not to laugh,
Dreams turned to nightmares,
My satan that had my tangled hate,
Would she be the one to destroy my fate?
I chose to follow the footsteps,
Of a dead dark angel,
She whispers, "We are almost there,"
She held on to my hand,
Saying it's a long way down,
Just ignore your pain,
Just ignore your regrets,
Just ignore your shame,
I chose not to love,
I chose not to feel,
I chose not to believe,
Fantasies became real,
My satan has left me her eternal door,
Would she be the one that melts me in the floor?
The haunting ghosts stays by my side,
When I am sitting in the dark alone,
Telling me to drift to my eternal sleep,
So no one can hurt me,
I would lay in the coffin,
Wearing this silk black dress,
My long auburn hair down,
Not being able to see my green eyes,
They say, "We forgive her for being herself,"
"We forgive her for not being like us,"
I chose not to talk,
I chose not to blame
I chose not to have faith,
My satan wasn't what I thought she would be,
All along I never knew she was me.