OCTOBER 19, 2002
Today was better than yesterday, but still not very good. I am nearly as depressed as I was when I was hospitalized in February for being suicidal. Everything is just so screwed up right now. One thing that I've learned is that I'm not alone. People everywhere are suffering. Good people that have bad things happen to them. I am no different. Life goes on and I have to continue living. I just don't know if I can. I just want to sleep away the days. I'm scared to death of everything. I'm afraid to go to sleep because I'll have to wake up and deal with tomorrow. Good memories are so bad - they make me so sad.
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