This is a bricklayer's accident actual (verbatim) report, which was > > > printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent of the > Workers' > > > Compensation board. This is a true story. Had this bloke died, he'd > have > > > received a Darwin Award without question... > > > > > > Dear Sir > > > "I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the cause of > > > my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the > following > > > details will be sufficient. > > > > > > I am a bricklayer by trade. > > > > > > On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new > six > > > story building. When I completed my work, I found that I had some > bricks > > > left over which, when weighed later were found to be slightly in > excess > > of > > > 500 lbs. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower > > > them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of > the > > > building on the sixth floor. Securing the rope at ground level, I went > up > > > to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then > I > > > went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow > > descent > > > of the bricks. > > > > > > You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh > > 135lbs. > > > > > > > > > Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost > my > > > presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope Needless to say, I > > > proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity > of > > > the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at > an > > > equal, impressive speed. > > > > > > This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken > collar > > > bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form. > > > > > > Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until > the > > > fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. > > > Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was > able > > > to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience a > great > > > deal of pain. > > > > > > At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the > > > ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight > of > > > the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. > > > > > > I refer you again to my weight. > > > > > > As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the > > > building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming > up. > > > > > > This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several > > > lacerations of my legs and lower body. > > > > > > Here my luck began to change slightly. > > > > > > The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my > > > injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only > three > > > vertebrae were cracked. I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there > on >the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure > > and > > > presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the > > empty > > > barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two > broken > > > legs. > > > > > > I hope this answers your inquiry." > |