| The Grand Theft Auto Dis Page |
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| All About The Guy Typing At Gunpoint For Fear Of His Life: |
| My Name Ain't Important. If You Keep Being A Wise Guy You'll Find Out Just How Unimportant, As In I Just Got Shot In The Head Unimportant. |
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| This is a special place that will be updated from time to time with things i can think of to make fun of GTA3. If an employee of Rockstar, DMA Design,Take 2, or Renderware is reading this, please don't sue me! I'm only doing this cuz i like it so much. As for the rest of you, please hate it with me. |
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| GTA3. What else is there to say? Oh, yeah, I hafta talk about how shitty it is. Well, here goes. #1- GTA3 has some of the worst pop-up I've seen in a PS2 game (besides all those crap games like Dragon Whateverthehell) #2- I wish they had some motorcycles or something, 'cuz to me that was the best part about the other games #3-Make more unique jumps, damnit! #4-The graphics are pretty gay.I will also be writing short stories about living in Liberty City and I hope you will enjoy them. Thanks For Visiting! Now get a car and drive-by shoot some old people! |
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| Life In Liberty- Number Two: Cram A Bat In It, Pal! |
| This picture was taken just moments after I started my now infamous "Happy Blimp Human Take-Out With Shotgun Blasts For Free" incident as the Liberty Tree so lovingly put it. They don't know what actually happened. I was hungry, so I got myself a Perrnenial (The old man in the background is stealing it ). I drove through the park and parked next to the restaurant. I walked in very non-chalantly and asked for a Mega Blimp meal, Happy sized, with a Cocksi to drink. The register buscuit said i would hafta pay a dollar extra for the happy size. That's when I flipped. I took out my shotgun and shot toward the register bucuit. His head flew off and landed in the deep fat fryer. I then proceed to kill all the small children in the place with shots to the abdomen that tore them in half so that when their tiny bodies hit the floor, there was a torso and some legs spread a few inches apart. This made all the parents insanely mad with rage. They rushed toward me. I shot the first wave. The others started to run. I shot all of them. Then i blew up their cars with grenades. |
| After destroying all their cars, I took out my psycho abuse on some Bill Cosby look-alikes and waited for the police to show up. When they finnaly did, I shot all their cars with the rocket launcher and ruined the lives of even more helpless victims. I ran from the F.B.I. when they showed up. I ran up to the top outside balcony of the AMCO building and lobbed Molotov's over the side. I wound up killing myself that way. I accidently burned myself with the fire from one and jumped over the side to end the pain. Twentt-five thousand dollars later, I'm back on the street, killing once more. Idiot doctors. Mu-Hahahahahahahaha! |
| Do you like the bouncing dead rhinos? I do. |
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| Life In Liberty Number One- The Happy Blimp Incident |
| Once, when I was in Portland, I wanted to get some Punk Noodles from ChinaTown. Little did I remember that I had killed about 30 Triads the day before, and that they were out to get me. I walked up to the counter to order my meal and 20 Triads came up behind me with baseball bats like the bitch above me. Well, lucky for me, there was an adreniline pill nearby. I grabbed it and went Matrix on all those bitches. I pulled out my AK and wasted 10 of them. The others didn't get the hint to run even though i wasted their "homies", so i pulled out my shotgun and blew off some kneecaps. That got through to them, but it was too late. I was already on an adreniline spree. I took out my flamethrower and made some toasty Triad snickity-snacks I saved for a scare. I picked up the smoky remains and threw them down in the Punk Noodles stand with a grenade wrapped safely inside. As I walked away, all I heard was the grenade exploding and the final screams of the inocent. God, how I love being insane. |
| www.oocities.org/Grandtheftmotto/alt_GTA_satire_page.html for Vice City screens and news!!! |
| ! Yay! |