This FAQ is produced by Lord Granitor for fun. If you think it sucks,that's okay. If you think it's great,that's okay too. Please take the time to email me with any other questions or comments about myself.
Q: How often do you update this FAQ ?
A: I last updated this FAQ on or around 20 June, 1998. However, this FAQ is now supplemented by several (more recent) FAQen, part of the Lord Granitor FAQ 99 Project.
Q: What changes have you made to this FAQ and your website in general?
A: There is no more website, really. I don't feel like maintaining it anymore. The only thing of interest is the projects page right now. I'm more into programming than web publishing the moment, and I spend most of my time enhancing my skills in more technical areas, such as Linux, Perl scripts, Java applications, and C games.
As this FAQ is getting a bit big, I've divided it into sections:
[ Personal stuff ] [ About my Web Pages ] [ Latest updates ]
Q: How would you decribe yourself?
A: I'm an Alpha Shadow of a Class-6000 entity know as Apollyon. Being a former member of the Q continuum, me and my pi0us friends first came here in 100 B.C. to investigate a distress signal from a fallen ship. Since they, we have tried our best to stay out of the business of Mortals, awaiting the Final Age.
Q: What is the Final Age?
A: This is it, the Information Age... He who controls information, controls the world. That is the reality we are living in. As more and more emphasis is placed on "virtual" experiences, generations of people who relate to reality in previously unheard of ways are being spawned. For those who don't know how things work, everything is like Voodoo. Indeed, programmers are the druids of the 21st century.
Q: I have heard rumours that you are immortal. How is this possible?
A: Yes, I am. When zero marries infinity, the circle ends and the tangent becomes the radius.
Q: Glek Splok Erk?
A: Exactly!
Q: Why are you so wierd?
A: I am in no way wierd. Any differences between us probally stem from a difference in philosophy. It is necessary to have different philosophies in order to interact with different environments.
Q: Why are you so perverse?
A: I am not perverse, I merely recognize sex as a natural part of life.
Q: Have you ever had professional help ?
A: I've seen a Medical Doctor, a counsellor, and a Physcologist, all who say that I'm fine.
[To vetenarians] No,but feel free to examine me,if you wish.
[To human doctors] Go back to med. school and see if you're good enough to be a vet now.
Special thanks to "cooltat" for her insights into the medical profession.
Sorry about that "keikoku".
Q: I have a question not asked above. Will you answer it?
A: Yes, just send email to: granitor@mail.sunbeach.net
Q: Are you ever on IRC?
A: Yes.
Q: What IRC Networks do you frequent?
A: FEFnet (irc.fef.net) ; Undernet ; FDFnet .
Q: I guess your IRC nickname is granitor,right ?
A: Usually.
Q: Where do you go to escape?
A: Escape? Well, living next to a main road tends to become a bit annoying at times. Perhaps that's why I work.
Q: Sound like you spend a lot of time alone.
A: It is better to be alone than unhappy. Also see Proverbs 25:24. Besides, God is always with me.
Q: Is this FAQ ever going to end?
A: Yes,but not in a hurry.
Q: What is your opinion on sex?
A: Sex is a natural part of life, similar to programming being a natural part of videogames. You don't have to do it, it takes a lot of effort, but it's very satisfying when you reach completion, not to mention while one is in the process.
Q: Were you refering to sex or programming in the above answer?
A: Both.
Q: Do you have a girlfriend, wife, lover, or other such?
A: There are many who have the potential and perhaps have even tried to fill that position. However, I have never taken pleasure in the chase or any other creul games that "normal" people play with girls. I love and respect many females, young and old, ages 14 to 40-some, of all races, nationalities, and various philosophies (some virgins, some much more experienced...). The friendships which I have built with these ladies (for they are all mature enough for that title) could last into eternity. As for a structured relationship, I have no objection to such, but I find that most often, ladies need a friend which they can trust (and occasionallly express affection towards).
Q: Sounds like you're not ready for a relationship.
A: You hear incorrectly. I have experienced,personally and from an objective stand point,many varied relationships,and realised that the important factor which untimately decide the success or failure of a relationship is the underlying friendship. [This is an over-simplyfication, but should suffice...] Therefore, I aim to built stong friendships first (or terminate a dangerous friendship if necessary) before proceedig further,if I proceed at all.
Q: So,do you have a girlfriend or not ?
A: I never consider myself to be in posession of another human being.
Q: Are you going to give me a straight answer?
A: My answers are straight, your thinking must be crooked.
Q: Well...excuse me.
A: You are excused :}
Q: Are you a hacker?
A: No, I'm an Information Technology Specialist.
Q: What's the difference?
A: I'm not as intense as a true hacker.
Q: What's your sexual preference?
A: I'm a lesbian. I jaust happen to be in a male body.
Q: How much time do you spend programing?
A: Every single minute of my life... I program myself, my family, my friends... always trying to elevate us to higher heights... I enjoy programming nuff, some times to an immense degree.
Q: What programming projects are you working on?
A: My current project is KC, a simple board game. I'd rather be working on an RPG, but time is money and I prefer to get paid.
Q: What other computer systems do you own?
A: Besides Penny (my Pentium), I own a working C64 (with a 1541-II disk drive), a broken 64 (the graphic chip's dead), a working Atari 2600 (Missle Command rules), a broken PSX-A (overheating sucks), a working PSX-C (Soul Blade rules), and that's about it, besides my CASIO 9850G calculator. I used to have a PSX-B as well, but I gave that to a buddy of mine.
Q: Do you plan on getting more computers?
A: Of course! But not anytime soon. More storage space is a must, though.
Q: How do you support this expensive hobby?
A: I have a full-time job, and, I have an imaginary friend who sells drugs to innocent youth for me.
Q: Do you really expect me to believe that you make money by having a figment of your imagination sell drugs?
A: Well, he certainly believes it... his name is George. He used to be green, then he became invisible and I wished that one day he would be real again. Now he is, and has my cousin for a girlfriend, no less...
Q: How is this possible?
A: Well, if mathematicians can work with imaginary numbers (real multiples of the square root of -1), then it's quite logical for a person to have no real components.
Q: Aren't you worried he'll get arrested?
A: No, this is all imaginary, remember?
Q: What one word do your peers use to describe your most prevailent attitude?
A: Militant.
Q: What does "militant" mean?
A: The official Kolij defination of militant is as follows:
militant a. & n. 1.aggressively active, as one fighting for one's life, with disregard for all of the following: society , friends, family, bedfellows, local customs, legal system, conscience.
Q: What one word do you use to describe yourself?
A: Granitor.
Q: What does "granitor" mean?
A: The official Kolij defination
of granitor is as follows:
granitor a.
one possessing a resolute attitude, tending towards militant
behavior in order to achieve a specific personal goal.
Q: You said one of your hobbies is interfacing. What, exactly, is interfacing?
A: My definition of interfacing is as follows:
interface 1. v. to communicate meaniful information,esp. between persons or things with obvious differences (I interfaced my Commodore 64 to my Pentium,and uploaded my old diary from my 64) Hence n. interface 2. n. device used to allow two different persons or things to communicate
Q: Do you play videogames?
A: Play? No, but I occasionally tick videogames with extreme presistance.
Q: What is your favourite system?
A: The Sony PlayStation.
Q: Why are you a PlayStation fan?
A: [Link to Why PlayStation Rules]
Q: What is/are your favourite games?
A: Chrono Trigger (for SNES) , Street Fighter Alpha (for
PSX), The Tekken Series, Soul Blade. (basically, anything Square, Namco, or Capcom).
Special Thanks to "Kerms" for lending me the SNES and CT.
Q: Are you a member of any organisations?
A: I am a member of the Harrison College Venture Scout Association. In the future, I'll tell you more about Ventures...it's a kool organisation.
Q: Why did you do a personal Web page?
A: For fun.
Q: Are you going to put a background image on your page?
A: I find that most backgroud images make reading text difficult. In addition, I design my pages to load quickly,and backgroung images can take a considerable time to load.The problem is exagerated as one or two of my friends use 2400 baud modems to surf the net (feel free to laugh with them...I do all the time).
Q: You page looks a bit plain. Are you going to jazz it up a bit?
A: As far as graphics are concerned , see previous answer. As I learn more about Web publishing, I may change my page to employ these newfound techniques (such as frames),but that's about all. I belive that the content is more important, which is why I've updated the page within 2 days of its creation.
Q: Where did you learn HTML and such?
A: I studied the source code of pages that I like, made my own pages in Netscape's Editor,and experimented with source code by using Notepad (or any other mild-mannered text editor) when Netscape failed to impress me as totally competent. My interest in programming helped me to graps the concept behind HTML fairly quickly.
Q: Could you teach me HTML ?
A: I have little patience for teaching. If you really want to learn,feel free to examine my pages and adopt any code you find useful for your own page. Use JavaScript and the like with care,they can be dangerous. Feel free to email me (granitor@hotmail.com) with any questions,and I'll try to answer them.
Q: JavaScript? I don't see any JavaScripts on your page! Where are they?
A: I removed the major JavaScripts before I announced this page,due to problems with (a) filename references and geocities' HTTP server (which is case-sensitive) , and (b) Problems with attempts to parse partial scripts (geocities pages tend to come in in parts over here). There are now almost no JavaScript on my page.
Q: I found a spelling error on your page. Why don't you spell-check it first?
A: As I proof read my pages myself,spelling errors are
almost bound to get thorugh (the best way to avoid spelling errors it to
have someone else proofread your document). If and when you find spelling
errors,email me and I'll correct them in my next maintainance update.
Q: Why did you do you choose Geocities ? I've heard your ISP gives you free space anyway...
A: There is an old local saying : "<<If a crab stays home,he doesn't get fat>>". I will eventually take advantage of Sunbeach's offer,but I feel that it would be mutually benefitial for me to publish this site at an internationally well-know site such as Geocities. Ironically,it is easier for me to update a page on Geocities than on Sunbeach,as I have to physically carry my Web page to Sunbeach,but I can upload a new page to Geocities from the comfort of my home.
Q: Why were those two pentagrams on your page?
A: I've always liked pentagrams. [My thanks to Wikka for allowing me to use the graphic from his page.] I believe that they added character to my page, but during my fever, I removed them. I have since decided to re-decorate my index page, but it may be a while before another graphic graces these pages.
Q: Are your pentagrams an indication of Satanism?
A: No, they actually represent my family's commitment to a Theocratic home, wherein we are all equal, yet different, and bound in love. We call this a pentagram of power (with God at the centre), within a circle of love.
Q: Are you at all concerned that pentagrams are used to summon demons?
A: Crosses are used by the KKK, and red thread by prostitutes. It is ludicrous to stop using something because a certain group of people attach a certain meaning to it. I never use pentagrams to summon demons, but rather to remind me of the wonderful spirit of love and mutal respect in my second house.
Q: Okay,I realise you want to be an individual, but what about demons? Don't you think they're naturally attracted to pentagrams?
A: No. A symbol's meaning is created by people. A pentagram has no intrensic value to demons, Angels, God, or anyone functioning on a spiritual level. Often, a person or group of people bestow this meaning, and their faith in the symbol activates spiritual beings, and not the symbols themselves.
Q: How are you so sure about this?
A: Because it makes logical sense and is based on true principals, which hold themselves to be self-evident throughout all aspect of life.
Q: Pentagrams make me nervous... could you take them off anyway?
A: I've been asked to take off the pentagrams so much that I've written a standard rebuttal explain why I won't:
The documents which I have produced are painstakingly constructed to express my opinions, emotions, and beliefs. The animated pentagram is one of the best animated gifs I've seen. Indeed, it was the first endless looping animated gif I saw. I looked at the source code (yes, gifs have source code) and the elegant simplicity with which an apparently infinite animation could be constructed. In short, if you don't like my page, just don't visit it.
Q: Why are you so unconventional?
A: The brothers of Jesus always are.
Q: When did you put a counter on your page?
A: Sometime in October 1997, but since then i've resat (past tense of reset) it several times. No-one much visits this page anyway, though...
Sections in this kool page;
[ Personal stuff ] [ About
my Web Pages ] [ Latest updates ]
Q: It that the end?
A: For now,yes... but I'll be back with more additions to this FAQ, especially if you email me and ask me some questions.
If you haven't already, visit my Home Page. Also, visit my buddy Rohan's Home Page.