Scene 0- This does not exist.

It all started with a simple blown fuse. Mind you, it was in the Control Room. You know, the only room in Alpha Complex
that is Gamma Clearance. So Howard (I don't remember the other guy's name, but it's funnier if it's Moe...) and Moe get
the idea to replace the old fuse with a newer, faster, more durable transistor. But it does have to fit into the old slot. So it
has to be custom made. No problem. But while waiting for that part to be finished, a whole bank of RAM blew. Seems it
was on the same circut as that fuse. Again, no problem, we even have newer stuff than what blew in storage. Since we
need the fuse first, we may as well have them delivered to the same place, to make it easer to pick them up. Right? Sure.
But this stuff can't have random people poking around sensitive Computer equipment. So Howard assigns a mission
group to guard the box. Two Green Army Citizens. They are getting restless, and restless means curious. These guys
need a break. So he initiates a search for some Loyal Citizens. He knows fully what can go wrong, especially in Alpha. So
he knows he has to almost coddle the group to their assignment. So he sets up a ....

Scene 1- Mission Alert!

Your mission group is poised and ready, awaiting mission orders in Troubleshooter HQ. Various screens show various
things, like a blank screen, the Teela O' Malley Show, Security Cams, The Computer Test Pattern, and, of course your
room. (Pause. Yawn. Stretch.)Yep. Ready and waiting. Man, that Teela O #666 "Teela Goes To HEL Sector" never gets
old. You could watch her swing and bounce all day. You know you ought to be feeling something, but damned if you know
what. (Put your feet up. Relax.)

Surruptiously draw a lung full of air. Shout at the top of your lungs, "Suddenly your wristcom begins spewing paper!"

***Mission Alert! Mission Alert!*** Greetings, Citizens! Please report to room IA235/PDQ93¶.htm\MDK CDM 7 in Sector
DRV. Please do not disclose your destination to anyclone. Walk in a brisk manner, and do not chew gum.
KGGF479jfdeg4h058h4ih59hrtrhhrethe98RZSlack Attack!BBLzhH(*hhadf98phD*3EYION Take and personally deliver the
Form AExt.4HRCvrU.P/Bi.Bl.B. from PLC to the room specified. Have A Nice Daycycle, The Computer. ***Mission Alert!
Mission Alert!***

Scene 1.4- Pay Attention Now...

Notice there is no mission number. Or even a mission name. And it doesn't mention a briefing.

Scene 2- Briefing... wait, no, Where Is That From Here?.

The PC's have a few choices at this point. I'll discuss them all in turn.

Getting A Map, Checking with Secret Societies, Fooling Around, Stalling, or Trying to Go Straight There.

Trying To Go Straight There- Just ain't gonna work. Never happen. They have no idea where that room is.

Fooling Around or Stalling- Howard is watching, so The Computer prompts them, by name, and asks for an update on
their mission. If told little progress is made, The Computer suggests they hurry up, at MegaWatt Laser Point.

Checking With Secret Societies- This is second only to arguing with The Computer for futility. Any mention of the mission
is met with blank responses. No one has ANY idea that this thing is going down. Any requests for equipment is similarly
shot down, "We never heard of this mission, so, basically no. But any info about is will be .... appreciated." No one has any
favors to call in, so no worries there. No Society would even consider stealing it, either. Stealing things you know about,
fine. Stealing unknown things... not on MY doorstep.

Getting A Map- If they try a terminal, they are prompted for the destination. After entering the room number, they are
prompted for a password. This is contained within the mission alert. Should be easy to find the "Slack Attack!" If they enter
it properly they get the single most helpful "MaPPeR" program in Alpha. They list their Destination, it gives a straight line,
shuttle times, clearance coordinated, and everything. It will even print out a hard copy. However, ...(hehhehheh) that map
is real current. As in...  it goes bad in 10 minutecycles. If they get a map, then check with societies, the map will be bad, as
they get shuffled around the Complex. They get hit with credit problems at the turnstiles, asking for credits of certian
colors, denominations they don't have, getting diverted to DMV Sector, the works. They at some point end up in DOA
sector. There is a "map" terminal right there, though. This map is similarly current, though. But now they will have learned
their lesson. If not, when printed, there is small print at the bottom, which reads, "Do not continue to push my patience. Go
NOW."

Scene 2.8- This, also never happened.

Yes, notice Howard's handywork in the MaPPeR program. He's just doing what he can.

Scene 3- Masters of the Red Tape

After arriving at the aformentioned IA235/PDQ93¶.htm\MDK CDM 7  in Sector DRV, they get the privilage(?) of meeting
He-Y-MAN-4, and She-Y-RAA-3, two Yellow Clearance bureaucrats who like their jobs. They are both FCCCP, both
Adrenaline Controlled, and both CPU, they have nasal voicies, love pestering people filling out forms by talking, listing
things from other forms, comparing other forms, pointing to other sections, and especially by handing forms that require
triplicate out individually. That's pretty much all anybody needs to know. After the 3 forms are filled out, then hand the first
form and an envelope back to the PC's and instruct them to deliver them to DRV Sector R&D.

Scene 3.7- Nothing to see here...

Howard knows just what it takes to get these two going. He custom-made that envelope, too.

Scene 4- R&D: Playing With Atoms

Yes, it's Beak-I-MAN and his assistant Rat-BOY!.... No, it's not. Thankfully. Instead it's Chef-G-III and Al-G-GUY, who gets
called "Wierd" around the office. This, from R&D clones. And he's "Wierd". The Chef is known for dramatic and wild hand
gesticulations, and saying, "BAM!, THERE!, WHAM!", and just any old words that he happens to be saying, like THAT! Al
is just the average Dilbert who will readily obfuscate the simplest thing to Sound Important. For example,

"Well, to begin, in order to actualize the full potential of that device, let's call it a "Laser", you must first acclimate yourself
with your immediate surroundings thoroughly enough that you can acquire a "Fire-ee", as opposed to yourself, the
"Fire-er". Having acquired said "Fire-ee", which we will call for the sake of argument, the "Target", and you, the fire-er,
which we will now call the "Shooter", acquired said "Target", you must then utilize your "Arm", preferably the "Arm" you
have trained to fire such a device with, although in a tense situation, the other "Arm" may be used. Now, having acquired
the "Target", and actualizing your, for the sake of argument to the problem posed, "Firing Arm", you must then train your
ocular digits, or your "Eyes", on a visual level, using your supposed "Brain" upon a line-of-sight type of variable, thus
"Mentally" creating an "Imaginary Line" from the end of your "Laser" connecting to the "Target", taking into consideration
such factors as "Target" movement, the 3 dimensional "Axis" which represents the "Laser" itself, of course only in as much
as the "Axis" also factors in the cloneiform extended manipulator, or the "Hand", as it were. Now, after factoring in the
"Axis" plus the "Hand" to the "Line" reaching to the "Target", you must apply tension to the index or "Primary" finger by
placing it upon the triggering mechanism, now referred to as the "Trigger",  of the aforementioned device, the "Laser" and
applying enough pressure to bring the "Trigger", to full activation within the "Laser", thereby causing the circuit to close in
the standard fashion, creating an "Actual" line, starting within the "Laser", moving through the part of the "Laser" that is
held by the "Hand", then upward through the "Actualization" crystal, then further through the "Focusing", force, and beam,
then extending through the replaceable "Barrel" that, if properly calculated, will align completely with the "Mental Line" that
was previously "Imagined", producing a "Laser Beam" that will strike the intended "Target" and cause them "Damage",
always making sure that too much "Pressure" is not applied to the trigger, throwing the "Axis" off. The "Damage" that is
caused is usually associated with the "Beam", and varies depending on the strength of the "Laser" being "Fired", if you
will. If necessary, you may repeat the process, after having to re-calculate the "Hand", "Axis"," "Laser", "Firing Arm", "Line"
"Primary", Trigger", "Laser", "Pressure", "Axis", "Actual", "Target", and "Damage".

(Yes, I was very bored when I wrote that, but... (tee hee) for the sake of .... brevity, I ... cut it down a bit.)

Anyway, these two techies take the form and the envelope, open the envelope, take the piece of microfiche, insert it into a
reader, and read off the list of experimental equipment.

(The Return Of) The Voice-Activated Plasma Generator Suit (with optional neurolink, infected with St. Vitas Dance)
Assualt Shaker
Multi-Gun - Laser L5 x 17, Ice-I 3 x 6, Gauss G2 x 100, Plasma F5 x 2, Tangler 4 x 5
Kinetically Powered Needler (hang on, I gotta spin it...)
One box (one doz.) asst. I Scream Cone
Cargo-bot (theory of Less is More; It is a breakthrough in teleportational technology. When you put stuff on it, the stuff
dissapears to the nearest PLC and it remembers all the locations, )
Peril Sensative Glasses (Special sensors detect danger. They darken on the theory of "If I can't see it, it can't hurt me.")
Little Red Pills (Hormones. Teen-age hormones. Listed as "Strength Pills".)

opt.
"Whites"- Ping Pong ball sized exploders, or napalmers, 50/50
Staff of Wonder- Electric attacks, fire attacks, or ice attack. Variable settings, many buttons, levers, dials.
Sonic Amp- Kinda like a bull horn, but ending up like a sonic boom.

If asked about any device's operation, "Wierd" Al-G-GUY will happily help- till it hurts. Or they hurt him. Well, they'll try, but
personal force fields are useful. For him. When they have the form filled out for all the equipment, yes, just one, for all of
the stuff, they hand the PC's form UPC85769uh to give to the Yellows.

Scene 5 -  Short and Sweet

So now they head out back to IA235/PDQ93¶.htm\MDK CDM 7  in Sector DRV, with UPC85769uh, and a few choice items
from R&D.  They have no problems here, because they are probably on schedule. If they got this far, they couldn't be
outside the parameters of the Citizen who's watching/guiding them. When they turn the form over to the two Yellows, they
look at the paper, giggle to each other, and pull out rubber stamps by the box. They carefully stamp various places on
Form UPC85769uh. They ask for a simple index fingerprint on the backside, and gleefully hand the form back to the PC's.
They tell them "Now you need to go to DRV PLC for a few simple items. Come back here when you're done." Giggling is
the only sound as they exit.

Scene 6 - PLC Soup

They should arrive at PLC with no problem. They should also be real nervous. Have a few random Citizens ask them what
they're doing. Have an Ultraviolet ask for a glass of water, just for the random treason points for failure to obey an
Ultraviolet Citizen. When they get to PLC, at the end of a line that disappears around the corner, all of a sudden they
notice the line moving. Really fast. Like the Computer is suddenly accepting and approving everything put in front of it.
DRV PLC is suddenly moving at 95% efficency. The clerks are amazed, and somewhat less surly than before. When the
PC's get to the desk, they hand their form over to PostalWork-O-GUN-3, who looks at the form, smiles, and hands it
behind him to Carr-Y-VRS, who sneezes on it.

Scene 6.3- Nope

Yes, Howard here again. Boy is this gonna cause trouble later. Cause EVERYthing got approved, filed, and handed out.
Stuff that was never, in a million cycles ever supposed to be distributed in Alpha.

Scene 6.5 - An Interlude with a Carte Blanche

This form, UPC85769uh, is authorization for PLC to literally dump any overstock currently held for over 5 monthcycles
over to the authorized bearers. PostalWork-O and Carr-Y both know that this is a major favor from He-Y and She-Y, so
they anticipate two favors. One is played out, and the other is owed later. The two PLC clerks know that He-Y and She-Y
hate to leave their desks, so they shuffle a few papers, and instead of handing over Form AExt.4HRCvrU.P/Bi.Bl.B. to the
PC's, they instead hand over Form AAExt.4HR.\8HR/Bi.Bl.B. The first form, AExt.4HRCvrU.P/Bi.Bl.B. is the correct form,
that authorizes the Green Citizens (to be met shortly) to an hourcycle lunch break, and then back for another 4 hour shift.
The new form, AAExt.4HR.\8HR/Bi.Bl.B. tells the Green Citizens that they have been extended from two 4 hourcycle shifts
with a lunch, to a double 8 hourcycle shift with no break at all. Ain't we got fun.

Scene 6.7 - Dessert-ion

The papers have been filed. Now the PC's are in for a bad hosing. They have been Officially assigned thousands of
pounds of maybe useful things, not so useful things, and some is just plain junk. It is being delivered in small chunks, by
bots who know this is supposed to be a two hour job. They were instructed to take 10 minutes. How about the words,
overloaded, too fast, brakes? what are those?, no, I can't slow down, and did you order that crunchy? work as
desctiptions? Did they remember that cargo-bot? Hmmm. It would be real handy. Right now. It is a breakthrough in
teleportational technology. When you put stuff on it, the stuff dissapears. To where? The nearest PLC. It remembers all
the locations, but stuff has to be "pulled out of a hat." This makes things... interesting. If nothing is specified, it is a
"random" item.  Having done their job, the PLC staffers take one last look at the paper, and say "Sign right here. Your
bots will be in room IA235/PDQ93¶.htm\MDK CDM 7 , in this sector. Take this paper, and Form AExt.4HRCvrU.P/Bi.Bl.B. to
... it says here ahh, He-Y-MAN-4, and She-Y-RAA-3. Yes, they will recieve those forms. Good day."

Scene 7- Now for the last time...

Now they have one right form, and one wrong form. The right form gets them assigned the U.N.C.L.E. or Ultimate Nuclear
CLone Encyclopedia, and the Bouncy Bubble Bob. The other form is going to get them a lot of trouble. The Yellows look
at the second form, smile at each other, stamp the form, and hand the form back to the PC's. They tell them, "Good, now
all this is in order. You need to deliver this to the room in DRV Sector at the end of this hall by following the red line on the
left wall. This form needs to be delivered to the Green Citizens."

Scene 8- The Last Red Room

If they follow the red line on the left wall, they get lost, but only for 15 minutes. They follow it back to room, and then follow
the red line on the right wall, they end up at a big imposing door. The keypad is unresponsive. They have to knock on the
door to get a response. The Greens, bristling with odd armaments, answer the door by opening it a crack and saying,
"Waddya want? Reds? Go 'way." They show the form. They have to show it. They don't have anything else to do. One
Green grabs it, reads it, shows it to his or her partner, and grimaces. They open the doors wide, point to a spot on the
form and say, "Didn't hit this box quite, needs to be done again... those Yellows are at this room here? Room
IA235/PDQ93¶.htm\MDK CDM 7 ? Yeah, we're gonna fix... that form, and get this all cleared up. No problem. You guys,
you gotta help us out, we're in a tight spot, see, we just need you guys to watch this box. That's it. Just watch this box...
and don't touch the bars, they're electrified...", as they're sliding past the PC's and hustling them into the room. "Just
make sure nothing happens to the box." Then they close the big doors with a hiss.

Scene 8.2- HA!

These Green Guys are Gone. They won't hear from them for four hourcycles. They went to go "chat" with the two Yellows,
who tell them to go play on a firing range for a few hourcycles, but to make sure they're back in enough time.

Scene 9- All Boxed In And Nowhere To Go

Now they're all alone. With a big box in the middle of the room, surrounded by metal bars. Yep. Two chairs indicate where
the two Greens were sitting. Near those two chairs is a clipboard with a paper on it. If someone looks at it is a log.
Beginning four hourcycles ago, in 3 minutecycle increments. "No interference... no interference... no interference... no
interference... no interference...". For four hourcycles. How many players are there? More than two? Gee. Well, time to
settle in.

Scene 9.1- The Box, And It's Cage

The box does indeed contain a fairly large bank of RAM, and that fuse that Howard needs. They are somewhat delicate,
and so are in a custom foam box. That foam box is inside of a plasteel box. The plasteel box is in a static-proof case. And
so on. The outer black box is about 15 feet high. It is made of plastic. Thin plastic, too. If it is hit with a slug, it won't harm
the contents in the least. Fire makes it melt and smell bad. Electricity just hits the bars. Pretty much anything else is
negligable. An EMP round needs to hit a spot already hit, and hurt very badly, and that is highly unlikely, even for
Troubleshooters. A tacnuke could destroy it, but no one has those. Not in this game. But the players don't need to know
that the box is that strong, or that the components are very well protected. Don't let that... hinder your description of
damage, though. Having black stuff ooze down the side and seeing a few layers of metal punched through is gonna make
'em real nervous since they can't look inside. It's just too dark. The cage is supposed to be electrified, but due to a local
power shortage, they just cut that part of the werehouse to half power. It's unoccupied, right? So it's just a big Jungle Jym.

Scenes 10 through 15- Scenes From A Hat

These are the encounters and events that happen. Because the GM says so. They can be preformed in order, or roll
some dice, if you feel the need. I originally wrote this for a MegaParanoia (Live Action) setting, so converting it to a great
tabletop game will take about 5 minutes.

Vatman Returns-

Above the box, on the catwalk, there are two doors. Vatman bursts through one door, firing wildly, and begins running on
the catwalk to the other door. After he gets a few running steps, a Blue Citizen comes through the door, also firing wildly.
The PC's have two options:

Stand and Watch, or Fire Up.

Standing and Watching means watching a great firefight across a catwalk. Vatman shoots the other door, and flees
through it. They only get 2 treason points for not assisting, hopefully they can express total confidence in the Blue Officer,
and may be convincing enough to talk their way out of that.

Most players won't do that, and will Fire Up. This means that Vatman will fire a few laser shots at them, and the Blue
shouts "Official Complex Business! Stand down immediatly!". Giving Vatman a precious few seconds to run to the second
door. This earns all the players 4 treason points for interfering in a Blue Clearance Investigation.

Field Trip-

Two teachbots enter the room, announcing, "And this is where Friend Computer stores things for good and lucky Citizens
who are on miss... Oh, we're sorry Citizens, we didn't know this room was being used. We will conclude this field trip
momentarily and be on our way." The teachbots gesture around the room, "These loyal Troubleshooters are very busy.
They are on a mission guarding this large black box. Troubleshooting is exciting. This strange black box must contain fun
and exciting equipment or even ... " lowers voice to a conspirital whisper, "experimental equipment." The kids, well, start
shouting and, acting like little kids. They get near the bars... then they start climbing it. Some of them start asking the
Troubleshooters questions. Lots of them. Sometimes repeatedly. "How does that work? How does that work? What does
that button do? What happens when you press this? ..." Not all of the Junior Citizens will be found when the teachbots
leave, but they don't bother with a headcount anyway. Each Junior Citizen termination without proper paperwork is 2
treason points. Damaging the bots is worth another treason point.

White Men Jogging-

Two Ultraviolet citizen come into the room, dressing in odd, fluffy white outfits. They know nothing about a box, orders, or
the fact that this room is occupied. They (being Ultraviolets) have had this room cleared for a while now for their
convenience. So they tell the PC's that they will jog anyway. They begin by jogging around the box. Then they stop and
look at the PC's just watching them, and say, "Are you Citizens slouching? Jog around this box with us. That's an order."
This continues (in MegaParanoia) until the people playing the UV's give out, or think it's not funny anymore. Headbands
can be left for massive treason points at GM's desire. Disobeying a UV's order, any of them, is good for 6 treason points.
Per offence.

Confusion Say "Exterminate!"-

The Troubleshooters hear a crash at an end of the room. They can see a shiny metal bot, bearing down at full speed,
heading straight for the box. Full speed isn't much better that walking kinda fast. The bot will bounce lasers, is shielded
against EMP and gauss, and slugs just make nice dinging sounds. It is saying "Where is the Leader?" over and over
again. It will take 15 minutes of real time to make it to the box. By the looks of the wall, the box doesn't stand much of a
chance either. And it doesn't. Somebody has to make a mental leap and say something, anything about the leader, they
can stall it for at least 5 minutes, because at the 20 minute mark, an Indigo Citizen comes through the hole, makes a quick
assesment, and shouts, "Number 7, 3, 4, 8, B, Designation Hork! You are out of your assigned area, and will return to it
immediatly! Non-compliance will result in memory scrub! Do you copy?" The bot turns around and follows the Citizen back
through the hole. The Indigo Citizen pokes his head through, and says, "Forget that number and designation! Knowledge
of such things is treason! This did not happen! Have a happy daycycle." If any citizen talks about any part of the incident,
they get 2 treason points since they are on camera.

External Auditing-

Two Yellow Citizens, Screw-Y-OOO-4, and GonnaGet-Y-OOO-5, come in with proper paperwork to preform an audit of
valuable Computer resources. They start poking around, catch the hole in the wall, (3 treason points) and a few Junior
Citizens (1 treason point each) running around. They take as many notes as an IntSec Officer, "tsk" a lot, and say, "Hmm,
this isn't good..." The PC's need to start justifying equipment, good luck justifying the bots, they don't really belong here
anyway, and then they ask about the box. This should be interesting. The PC's have no idea what's in it, or why it needs
guarding, or why it's even taking up expensive space. This isn't a combat scene, this is a talking scene. Any little thing is
worth a treason point, but again, they may be able to talk their way out of some of them. All they have to do... (heh, yeah,
ALL they have to do...) is convince the Yellows that any mission issued by the Computer must have a purpose. If you
argue that, then you are implying that the Computer isn't all up to snuff. This will make the Yellows run like a scrubot out of
HEL sector, and drop their treason points earned in this scene in half.

Rage Across The Room-

This is "Ye Olde Climactic Battle Shot". These guys need something to vent their "rage" against. So it will be provided in
the form(?) of a were-Citizen. A Seal Club Polymorph who botched an attempt to emulate an Outdoors creature. This
drove the traitor insane, so he went on a "frenzy". He "rampaged" his way through the hole in the wall. Just a simple fight
scene.

Were-R-WLF-6

Seal Club Polymorph Armed Forces

Unarmed Skill "Rend Limb from Limb"

10 Sucessful Laser shots will kill.
16 slugs will kill.
Flame destroys 1/4 limb, 4 hits destroys limb.
Ice is negligable.
Radiation is bad. The Citizen grows by 20 feet and gets madder.

Scene 16- Howard Can't Duck, But He Can Pay

Now, finally, Howard shows up. This should happen at about 15 minutes to spare. The Green Guys will be back in 15
minutes. The quicker they deal with Howard, the funnier it will be. Howard shows up in jeans and a flowered shirt. He
greets the PC's with a "Hey, guys! What happened to the Green guys who were watching this box?" Wait for an
acceptable response. "Okay, so how's it been?" Howard and the Indigo both know exactly what's been happening, but is
willing to make small talk. The monitors go "blind" when Howard walks through, so the Indigo can't see what's happening
now. Not even the Computer knows. "Well, I'll just relieve you of the box..." They should argue. Howard will insist. They
should ask for paperwork. Howard doens't have any. They should be a little hyped. Howard 1 should die. If that isn't what
goes down, it's a problem. Howard 2 shows up, and says, "Listen, guys, I assigned this mission, and I need the stuff in that
box. It's real important to Friend Computer." If (yes, if) the PC's draw weapons at Howard this time, he gestures and a
shimmering force field appears around him. If they argue, he just waves a form at them. Either way, if they still refuse,
Howard says, "Look. We can do this all day, or you can listen to me. You guys have a few problems with the Computer,
and I know the Computer. I can get you guys a promotion, verified right here, and clear out your treason points too. I will
even get you assigned to the post of your choice at your new YELLOW clearance, and you can check it out right over
here. Does that work? You guys did do a pretty good job, anyway. It would have been Green Clearance, except for those
meddling kids. I never like it when kids get hurt. So what do you say? Give me 5 minutes with that terminal over there."
They should agree. If (yes, another if) they refuse, how many clones do they have anyway? Howard pulls out a penlight
that terminates all the citizens in the room. If anyone survives this, they come back to an empty room, and two Very Angry
Green Army Guys. Game over.

Should they agree, Howard is good to his word. He asks where each of them would like to be assigned. No one knows
what he did at the terminal, or has any way to find out. But when he gets back, he hands each of them their reassignment
papers for fingerprint signature. They are filled out with the new clearances and everything.

This is the end of the adventure. They leave the room, and have the experience with Howard wiped from their memories,
and replaced with a mission well completed, and Friend Computer rewarding them VERY handsomely for "watching a box".

As a side note, the two Yellows and two Greens are all terminated for, in order, improper form shuffling, and dereliction of
duty.