The following is an excerpt from the Dog Purity Test at rec.pets.dogs http://www.k9web.com/dog-faqs/

    Getting the Dog

  1. You talked with more than 3 breeders before purchasing your last dog.
  2. Your dog was purchased on a co-ownership.
  3. Your dog was purchased on a spay/neuter contract.
  4. Your dog had his first CERF exam before he left his dam.
  5. Your dog was examined by a cardiologist before he left his dam.
  6. You buy an X-pen for your new puppy.
  7. Who isn't born yet.
  8. Who isn't conceived yet.

    Health and Veterinary Matters

  9. You go on a diet, not to be more attractive, but to be a better handler.
  10. You know more about canine nutrition than human nutrition and it shows.
  11. You have had your dogs joints xrayed to find any orthopedic problems
  12. You have had your dogs eyes examined to find any visual problems.
  13. You have the eyes examined annually.
  14. You are on a first name basis with your vet.
  15. Your dog's medical bills are higher than yours because you take better care of him than you.
  16. You bring research articles of interest to your vet.
  17. You educate your vet on the specific health problems common to your breed.
  18. You have different specialty vets for your dogs.
  19. You know what OFA means.
  20. CERF
  21. ACVO
  22. OVC

    Social Acceptability

  23. Have you ever lobbied for dog-parks in your area?
  24. You evaluate a potential SO by how much your dog likes him.
  25. You evaluate potential new jobs by whether the organization allows dogs at work.
  26. You've taken your dogs with you to work.
  27. More than once.
  28. You would be more offended if they insulted your dog than your SO?
  29. Being a totally calm and reasonable person have you ever lost it with some moron who has the nerve to insult your dog?
  30. Your dog sleeps with you.
  31. Do you find it hard to understand why people think "bitch" is an insult?
  32. Do you unblushingly talk about "gorgeous black bitches with wonderful rears" in restaurants?
  33. Have you ever cleared out a restaurant talking about problem whelpings?
  34. You don't care about strands of dog hair in the food.
  35. You don't care if you have dog hair on your clothes.
  36. If you own a light colored dog you never wear black again even though it's very flattering on you.
  37. Or you wear black anyway becase "what's a little hair?"
  38. Most of your tshirts feature your favorite dog/breed.
  39. Your husband does something nice for you and you say "good boy" and pat him on the head.
  40. You pass up attractive social invitations because they'd conflict with your training schedule.
  41. You don't even want to think about how your car would be paid for, your mortgage would be much smaller, and you might have some savings if you didn't do dog shows/obed/trials/agility/etc.
  42. You have the class and show schedules in your head, but frequently miss the kid's piano lessons, girl scouts, or changing the oil in the car.
  43. The only thing your friends, colleagues, passing acquaintances can think of when they see you is "How are the dogs?" or "How many dogs do you have now?" or "How did you do at the last show?"
  44. Your vacation days are all allotted toward dog shows, trials, or other activities with your dogs.

    In the Car

  45. Do you have crates permanently set up in your car?
  46. Does your car always contain:
  47. Crate(s)
  48. whistle
  49. gates
  50. jumps
  51. thermos of water,
  52. Rain gear, including muck boots
  53. extra leashes and collars including a slip leash (for dogs you MUST rescue)
  54. dog treats (or the dregs) in at least three places
  55. digging into the seat cushions will usually reveal something the dog will appreciate
  56. You can't see out of the passenger window because of the dog snot art.
  57. You CAN see out the passenger window because your dogs are all crated when in the car.
  58. You have a second car so they have one to transport people without getting them dusty and furry
  59. Have you purchased a larger car to accommodate your dogs.
  60. You have photocopies of your dogs' rabies certificates in the glove compartment.

    At Home

  61. Have you purchased a larger house to accomodate your dogs.
  62. Have you built kennels for your dogs.
  63. You make sure new carpeting doesn't show dog fur too badly.
  64. Your furniture matches the dog.
  65. The trash baskets are all permanently installed under sinks or in cabinets to keep the dogs out.
  66. You discover that tweed is the perfect fabric: it hides hair from the black/tan dog, the blue/white dog, the brown/black/gray/white tabby cat, and yourself.
  67. You find that a multicolored tapestry upholstry is great for the furniture because it hides the hair AND holds up to the dogs.
  68. You pick your next kitchen floor based on what will hold up best to the dogs running over it but not be slippery.
  69. You pick your next carpet for color and texture to hold up to the dogs.
  70. You appreciate architectural features of houses that allow you to easily block off portions of the house from the dogs.
  71. You get a house with a mudroom so you can clean the dogs up when coming in from a walk.
  72. You install a bathtub in the garage so you can wash your dog standing up.
  73. The baby gates in your home are really for dogs.
  74. You use crates as furniture in your home.
  75. You have a sign up with your kennel name on it.
  76. You have a door mat with your dog breed illustrated on it.

    Merchandise

  77. You save dog hair to be spun into yarn.
  78. You knit or crochet articles of clothing from your own dog.
  79. You learn how to spin your own dog hair.
  80. You've purchased breed-specific paraphenalia (mugs, key chains, t-shirts).
  81. You've hired an artist to draw/paint your own dog.
  82. Your dog has been a model for breed-specific paraphenalia. (sp?)
  83. Most of the artwork in your house features your breed.
  84. You've done dog-related needlework or cross stitch patterns.
  85. You have every book published on your breed.
  86. You can spot mistakes (mislabelled pictures) in these books.
  87. You have been known to go back and pencil in the names of the dogs of unlabelled pictures.
  88. Even though you don't speak a certain foreign language, you get several dog magazines in that language. And you have spent so much time looking at them, they are starting to make sense to you.
  89. You read "30,000 names for your baby" books to choose the name for your next dog.
  90. You get kicked out of the bookstore b/c you've spent too much time looking at baby name books without buying anything.

    On the Internet

  91. You belong to an email list about dogs.
  92. More than one.
  93. You run an email list about dogs.
  94. More than one.
  95. You've scanned your dog's picture in and uploaded it for Internet folks to see.
  96. You purchased a computer system so you could do this.
  97. All you do is look up dogs on the Internet.
  98. You maintain a web page about dogs (your breed or dogs in general).
  99. You have contributed a FAQ to rpd.info
  100. More than one.

    Training

  101. Do you know what crates are?
  102. Do you have one for your dog?
  103. One for each dog?
  104. Do you have more crates than dogs?
  105. You have more collars or leashes than dogs.
  106. Have you trained your dog to come on command?

        Knowledge of Breeding

  1. You know what the gestation period of a bitch is.
  2. You've read books about whelping.
  3. You own a book about whelping.
  4. You've witnessed a whelping.
  5. You know what ocytocin is used for.
  6. You know what uterine inertia is.
  7. You've had it happen to a bitch of yours.
  8. You've tried to discourage others from breeding who were not not done any of the health checks of the dogs before breeding them.
  9. You've been successful!
  10. You were someone like this who changed her mind when presented with the facts.
  11. You have neutered a dog because it did not display the abilities a dog of its breed should.
  12. Does "AI" make you think of insemination rather than intelligence?

    Experience in Breeding

  13. You have bred a bitch.
  14. More than once.
  15. More than one bitch.
  16. You've bred a bitch that you yourself bred (that is, the bitch is also of your breeding).
  17. You have whelped a litter.
  18. More than one.
  19. You've had to make that emergency trip to the vet during whelping.
  20. You've had to do emergency cesarians on the bitch
  21. You've raised a litter of puppies by hand, nursing them around the clock.
  22. You have put a male dog out to stud.
  23. More than once.
  24. More than one stud.
  25. A stud dog that you yourself bred.
  26. You only breed dogs you have thoroughly checked for suitability to be bred.
  27. If you had no dogs or puppies to place, you cheerfully referred callers to others that you knew had dogs available.
  28. You are not afraid to tell people you don't think they will be happy with one of your puppies.
  29. You are happy to take one of your puppies back if the home you found for it doesn't work out.
  30. You have taken such a puppy back.
  31. You sell all your puppies not intended for breeding on spay/neuter contracts and/or with Limited Registration / Non Breeding papers.

    Knowledge of Conformation Shows

  32. You know what conformation is.
  33. You don't misspell it as confirmation.
  34. You know what a specialty is.
  35. What sweeps are.
  36. What High In Trial means.
  37. What a JAM is.
  38. You know what Westminister is.
  39. You've watched it on TV.
  40. You've been present as a spectator.
  41. You know what Indefinite Listing Privilege means.
  42. You have a dog with ILP.
  43. Do you know the meanings of the following acronyms:
  44. AKC
  45. RPD
  46. CD
  47. CERF
  48. OFA
  49. GSD
  50. JH
  51. UDX
  52. VWD
  53. FCI
  54. GS-29466G33M-T
  55. OTD-scd
  56. You know what BOB, BOS, WD, and WB mean.
  57. You know what major points means.
  58. You know how many points (and majors) it takes to finish a show CH.
  59. You know how many points it is to do so in Canada.

    Experience in Conformation Shows

  60. You consider a golf course as a waste of a good show site.
  61. Dog show vendors know you by name, and ask after your dogs.
  62. You have three kinds of clothes--from worst to best: dog training clothes; work clothes; dog showing clothes.
  63. You've worked as a ring steward.
  64. As a Judge.
  65. You've helped set up/take down the rings.
  66. You plan your pregnancy around the show season so you won't miss shows or trials during the eighth and ninth months.
  67. You have memorized the pedigrees of your dogs.
  68. You have memorized the pedigrees of prominent dogs in your breed.
  69. You have a database containing the pedigrees of several (hundred if common, dozen if rare) dogs
  70. Most of which you typed in.
  71. You've shared your database with others.
  72. Over the Internet.
  73. If your dog is in obedience, you go to great lengths to find a pair of pants which blends with the coat color.
  74. If your dog is in conformation, you buy clothes to complement the coat color. You wouldn't be caught dead wearing a bright red dress behind a liver colored dog.
  75. You've gone to a dog show when there were hurricane warnings because you didn't want to be the one to break a major. :)
  76. You start out on the 300 mile trip for an outdoor dog trial even though there is a threat of rain.
  77. Do you look all over town to find fancy dresses with pockets?
  78. Have you learned to sew just to have dresses with pockets?
  79. Have the folks at the laundromat ever commented on your keeping liver in the pockets of your best suit?
  80. You have the point schedule for your breed and region memorized.
  81. For your breed in all regions.
  82. Your dog has been wicketed.
  83. You've said to someone standing next to you "Too bad they a-framed the dog".
  84. "That one paddles."
  85. "That one is close in the rear"
  86. "This one throws its elbows out"
  87. "This one has lovely side movement"
  88. "That handler is stringing the dog up".
  89. "An english lead would be better for that dog."
  90. You've stacked your dog.
  91. You've shown someone else how to stack their dog.
  92. You've had the judge correct your stack.

    Experience in Herding

  93. Have you ever kept ducks in the city, however illegal it may be?
  94. Do you research sheep husbandry just in case you ever get some?
  95. Have you moved out to the sticks so you could keep sheep for your dogs?

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