Once I believe that there was nothing for me in this void we have dubbed reality. Nothing but now existed, this, moments stretching onward with nothing at the end, but nothing. There was no real need to live. It was all numb. A numbing nowness that echoed through the walls of that hollow word "life." All my inner lamps shinned was darkness and I had no real reason in life that I could see, but to amuse my shrink and worry my parents. Despair became my only visible friend.
One day I took a walk along reality's walls, I couldn't then remember how I had come to be there, but it seemed as if something inside of myself had grown detached and I was lost, without the ability to think clearly. I met upon the most peculiar man. He was garbed in a almost stale fear, that came out of something older then I, myself, could comprehend. Shaking with something so hidden within my soul, I introduced myself as Lost Child. He leered at me the way people do when they know something more then you and about to dangle it over your head, just out of reach, gloatingly. In that smile I saw a flash of something almost familiar, the image of a bone man, dressed in a black robe and holding a stick with a long sharp knife attached at the end. The name Death floated to my tongue and I was suddenly let in on his frightening secret. I asked him if that was indeed who he was and he assured me that any malicious tones that might be associated with the name were entirely untrue. In my malleable state I couldn't disagree.
I followed as he beckoned me, unable to think of any reasons why I should or shouldn't for that matter. He was civil enough, this stranger, he almost lured me in a way that made me feel a need to follow him and see where he might take me. We happened upon my once long friend Life, who glared at the stranger and told me to come home. I was torn and had no inclination to either side over the other. Death smiled warmly at me and said that it might be best if I did go home, for it was already getting dark. Without a thought I took Life's hand. In that moment, in a flash of bright light, I heard mechanical breathing and felt as if something had been shoved down my throat and was forcing air into my lungs. I heard my mother screaming my name and people in uniforms were rushing about me underneath tiled ceiling and bright lights. In my confusion I jumped back and landed in Death's arms. I looked at Life standing angelic and serene on the sidewalk. Nothing had changed and my lungs rejoiced as they captured air on their own accord. Death smiled at me and continued down the street. I gave Life a look of bewilderment at his betrayal and ran after Death.
As I followed him, my pace slowed as my mind filled with the panicked voice of my mother calling out my name. I turned to see Life standing on the sidewalk looking after me and suddenly I realized that his face was my own. I turned to see my own eyes also being worn by the stranger, Death. I gasped and threw myself in the opposite direction then these demons. Death yelled for me to stop and he would take me to a better place. Life yelled for me to stop and he would take me to a familiar place. I didn't, couldn't and wouldn't believe either of these monsters. I ran on despite exhaustion, despite the visions of myself crawling with a medical staff running through my head. As my breathing came in shorter gasps, I realized that neither Life nor Death were chasing me. I was alone and lost.
During a look over my shouders, I tripped and tumbled and, in the moment of falling, razor blades flashed through my mind and my parents and how much, oh so how much I realized that I really wanted to see what Life wanted to show me. In the moment I saw through Death and all his tricks. As my head hit darkness, I reached out my arms to Life who was mysteriously standing before me. I saw my wrists covered with my own blood, slashed from my wrists and I recalled the darkness I had already fallen into and the heresy I had committed against my own body. I hit this new darkness I was falling towards and realized that it was Death holding me, cackling. With my final burst of energy, I burst forth and threw the screams of my mother at him. He recoiled and I stumbled into Life. Life smiled with my lips and told me that the darkest part was over, but I had a lot to learn. He reunited me with all I had taken from myself.
With that vision I gained the knowledge of the beauty of life, even in its darker moments. I became Adult and now I walk this void with Passion and Life always present by me side.