Bullshit

Stuff people say that you just KNOW is bullshit

The check is in the mail

I'm from your government, and I am here to help you

It's only a cold sore

You get this one, I'll pay next time

Trust me, I'll take care of everything

Of course I love you

Drinking? Why, no, Officer

I never inhaled

It's not the money, it's the principle of the thing

I never watch television except for PBS

...but we can still be friends

She means nothing to me

Don't worry, I can go another 20 miles when the gauge is on "empty"

Don't worry, he's never bitten anyone

I'll call you later

I've never done anything like this before

Now, I'm going to tell you the truth

It's supposed to make that noise

I *love* your new (hat/haircut/dress)

..then take a left. You can't miss it

Yes, I did