You know you're Asian when...

You either got bangs that are long enough to floss your teeth with or spikey hair that's sharp enough to impale animals.

You've had a bowl haircut at one point of your life.

You're so into brand name stuff that your pocket lint is labeled Ralph Lauren.

You only buy clothes that cost too much and say Ralph Lauren, Calvein Klein, Nautica, etc.

You go to a party filled wit other Asian people and you can't find your car because everyother one is an Integra or Civic.

You alwayz refer your friends with the term "foo".

You use the letter "z" too much when on-line.

You like to hit on Asian honeys who wear platforms you could've sworn you saw some clown use for stilts at the circus.

You substitute "peepz" for people because two syllables is too complex for you.

You got a 40 lb. bag of rice in your pantry and an extra 50 lb. bag in the garage.

You got a rice cooker with pretty little flowers all over it.

Your parents won't stop trying to get you into places for half-price by saying you're 12 when you're really 15.

Your parents like to brag about you to other parents. When the other parents leave, they start doggin you and lecturing you.

When you get a 4.0 GPA, you get nothing from your parents. But when you get anything less than that, you get lectures from them about how they use to be at the top of their classes in school.

Your parents say you can't date until you get out of medical school.

Your parents buy you clothes or shoes that are way too big and say you can "grow into them."

When you want to get a car, your parents lecture you about how they had to walk 10 miles through the rice fields to get to school.

Everyone thinks you're Chinese no matter what part of Asia you or your ancestors came from.

Your parents keep bargaining with people even though the prices are rock bottom.

Idiot people try to impress you with imitation Asian languages like ching chong woo bok chi, etc.

Your parents expect you to be best friends with anyone off the street of any given area as long as they are Asian.

Your parents cut of the green and black parts of the bread and say, "Eat it anyway. It's still good."

Your screen name consists of AzN or other Asian related things and every word in your profile is LiKe tHiS.

You claim you have AzN Pride wherever you go, but in fact you're only shaming your race.

Even when you're full, if someone says that they are going to throw away the leftovers, you'll finish it.

You've had to eat parts of animals they don't even dare to put in hot dogs.

Your parents hover over your tired, caffeine-drugged body at 12 midnight and say, "We studied even more (in our native country)."

An Asian women comes on campus and people ask you "Is that your mother? Well, then is it your sister?"

Your parents say, "Calculus?!? I took Calculus when I was in the 8th grade!"

Your parents say, "You want a stereo?!? I didn't even have shoes when I was your age!"

You speak "Chinglish" or other related languages which is 40% Chinese, 40% English, and 20% grunt.