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The sky was gray cast, lending the atmosphere some drab and
gloomy feeling. It was as if the heavens wanted to pour out all
its misery on the barren earth, but holding still. From my mind
was an image so much like this scene. I couldn't quite put my
finger on this something. Something I feel...that it's almost
tangible enough for me to see and touch yet I couldn't reach in
and feel my fingers around it. Something is happening, or did it
happen already? Or will it happen still?
I don't know.
I don't feel.
I don't see.
I am nothing.
Then, the mist lifted and everything
was as clear as as a summer day. I could understand it. as if it
were happening from memory long forgotten...as if it was there
all along and I just took the chance of seeing it for the first
time.
I walk into my room, the lights out and
the clock pointed it's hands so that it read 4 o'clock in the
afternoon. No wind to stir the branches of the trees, gray
clouds suffocating the sky, such sorrow within my surroundings.
But something's not right.
I kept on walking, then I stopped at my
bed, facing its length , my single bed giving me an ominous
feeling about something.
In the distance was the sudden clap of thunder, followed by the
unmistakable crack of thousand bolts of electricity...lightning
flashed in the darkness of the skies.
Trees began swaying to the rhythm of
the merciless wind. but still there were no raindrops to ease
the electrical feeling within.
On my bed was a black piece of plastic
bag, the kind you use to stuff small things in, with a red
drawstring.
but there's something familiar about this, it used to have some
sort of a picture on it...something's not right.
I knelt down and got the plastic bag.
Inside was a card, a black card.
I opened it but there were no words written on its surface.
Funny, I remember this card having some sort of a greeting in
it.
I began to peruse the wholeness of it, and then I discovered
that there was a hidden packet in it. I pulled out the sheet of
paper inserted in that packet and read the words scribbled on
it...
It read:
" Hey there
merry buddy? How're ya doin? Hope you're fine...
I'm
so sorry...I'm so sorry...I'm so sorry..."
The words were in black ink and written
as if by an old hand which was struggling to keep writing but
can't hold on to the pen. And the last word (sorry) ended up
having its letter "y" longer tail. As if the hand that
was writing fell limp and dragged the pen it's holding down,
making a jagged short line at the bottom of the last word.
All of a sudden the words started
bleeding, rivulets of crimson liquid seeped from the words, like
a freshly cut skin by a very sharp knife.
Then the tears started falling freely down. Blending with blood,
and the black ink of words. Together they soaked up the white
sheet of paper from the black card.
The tears never stop. It never will.
But when it does, then that's the only time I will realize that
I am crying still.
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