***QUESTION***
 
Hey David, 
 
Many thanks to you for your knowledge and insight 
on women. I have personally seen a 1000% increase 
in my ability to attract women. No doubt this
stuff works!! Now i realize the concept is to 
double your dating, and not double your 
relationships, but my dilemma is one i'm sure you 
get a lot.
 
Here's the situation: 
 
I met this girl while out at a local club. I'd 
say she was an 8.5 - 9 on my scale. But more 
importantly, had a personality to match her looks. 
Nice!! I immediately sprang into action and went 
over with a simple "Hi". And we chatted for a 
few minutes. I kept up the cocky/funny and played 
the character. Apparently my manner and approach 
was dead on, because she was very responsive and 
in fact commented on the way i presented myself. 
So anyway, we chatted, i got her number and told 
her i'd call. Said good-bye, and left. I 
actually called the next night (Sunday) but we 
were both too hung over to do anything. Well, on 
monday she called me. And has since called me at 
least twice for each time i have called her. 
We've been out several times for drinks as well. 
Here's my problem. I'm very interested in pursuing 
something more than casual dating. How do i go 
about balancing the art of cocky/funny and 
maintaining interest, but also come across as 
relationship material without wussing out?? I 
haven't bought her anything in the way of dinner 
or gifts, with the exception of a beer or two. 
BUT always after she's bought a round first. 
She's very independent, and i like that about her. 
I don't want some needy woman clinging to me all 
the time, but i would like to keep her interest 
high and continue through the various bridges you 
mention in your book. 
 
It may seem soon, but this one turns my stomach 
upside down and i feel the temptation to "Wuss 
out". BUT I REFUSE to turn into my old self. I 
guess i want to know some tips you could offer 
when you've doubled your dating and you find one 
you want to keep around for awhile? Is it ever ok 
to express your feelings while still keeping up 
the attraction? Or would you just continue doing 
what works, and see where that leads? Your time 
and insight is greatly appreciated.
 
Thank you. 
 
Sincerely, 
 
J. Jones 
Louisville, Ky 
 
 
>>>MY COMMENTS: 
 
 Well, a 1000% increase in success attracting 
women isn't that bad. Try harder.
 
 But your email brings up a topic and scenario 
that is very relevant to a lot of guys.
 
 And you're right... I don't teach guys how to 
"Double Your Relationships". But that doesn't mean 
that I don't think that I have something against 
getting into longer term relationships.
 
 In fact, I think a great relationship with a 
really wonderful woman can be an amazingly 
wonderful thing.
 
 The problem is that most guys don't have the 
confidence and choice that comes from 
understanding how to attract women anytime, 
anywhere... and they wind up settling for whatever 
woman happens to like them. And they also tend to 
act like total Wuss Bags when they ARE in
relationships because they have fear around the 
idea of her leaving.
 
 And this brings me to your question about what 
a guy should do if he meets a woman that he's like 
to work toward a longer term relationship with.
 
 The FIRST thing you should do is what you're 
doing... lean back and give her space.
 
 Most guys want to try and "corner the market" 
as quickly as they can when they meet a woman that 
they like, and try to convince the woman to be 
exclusive immediately.
 
 In my experience this is a BAD idea for a few 
reasons:
 
1. You don't know her very well yet. I make it a 
personal rule to not get into a 
"boyfriend/girlfriend" relationship with a woman 
for at LEAST 3-6 months. I want to get to know a 
woman before I'm interested in being attached.
 
 I once met a really hot girl for a cup of tea, 
and she told me that she likes to date a guy for a 
couple of weeks, then form a monogamous, 
long-term, boyfriend and girlfriend relationship 
with him, then sleep together.
 
 This was all at the first meeting I had with 
her over a cup of tea.
 
 I told her that she was crazy, and that I'd 
never get into a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship 
with some woman that I'd only known for a couple 
of weeks... and then I left.
 
 I had images of coming home in a few weeks and 
finding her going through my closets and saying 
"Who's is this?"
 
 Get to know a woman before you make your 
decision!
 
2. If a woman is the type that will get into a 
serious relationship with you quickly, then
there's probably a good chance that SHE has some 
issues.
 
 The last thing you need is a clingy woman that 
is out looking around for a man to complete her 
and give her life meaning...
 
 So you're doing the right thing. Nice.
 
 If you want to pursue a relationship
relationship, then you might want to actually 
start doing a sweet, romantic thing or two every 
once in awhile.
 
 A card, a flower, etc. is all it takes to 
communicate your message. But use them wisely, and 
don't start acting like a needy wussy!
 
 Also, when you start saying things like "I was 
thinking about you", "I really like spending time 
with you", and other lovey talk it says the same 
thing.
 
 Again, use sparingly... especially with 
independent women!
 
 And ultimately, if you want to actually have a 
real, honest-to-goodness relationship, then tell 
her how you feel about her.
 
 If you think she's worth having a relationship 
with, then you're going to need to take the risk 
at some point of telling her.
 
 I hope it works out for you!