7 july 2007

I had no time to work on the weblog. I wasn't motivated either. We've been to busy with a lot of things. Eir and I have travelled through latin-america, have lived a month with a tribe in the Amazonian rainforrest and have done a lot of crazy things.

Three months ago we met Sue, a witch from Birmingham and now we are a threesome. Can anyone explain to us why we can't get married as a threesome? After the legalization of the gay-marriage we should strive for the legalization of the marriage between more than two people. You can love more than one person, right? At least Sue, Eir and I love eachother very much, spiritually, mentally, emotionally, sexually and physically. So why can we not get married?

We bought a farm in Scotland and we are moving to our new home. At first we will live there as a threesome. In the future our little coven can grow. We have plenty of room.

I will not write very often on this blog. I don't feel like writing to much.

Some people send me emails and want to meet me, want a training as a witch, want initiations, etcetera. I don't teach and I don't give initiations to people, unless it feels very good. If you want a training as a witch search on the internet. Or surf to: circle.andreas333.com. Andreas has given me initiations and he taught me for many years. From him I learned the most. Besides this, he leaves people free. He teaches that you should do what seems good to you. You don't have to live by his rules, you don't have to do what he does. You are encouraged to do what you want. And he has such a vast knowledge, that I've never encountered elsewhere.

24 September 2006

About two weeks ago I had an encounter on a phorum with a stupid man, a nicotine-junk, who became hysterical when I posted some experiences of me with psycho-active drugs. The people who should have banned him from the phorum because of his behaviour suppported him, because they know him for a long time. Stupid people who start a phorum for witches, and then become hysterical when someone writes about magic plants. What do they think witches do? How can any witch condemn the use of magic plants?

Because of this experience, I decided to start a Yahoo-group for serious people who really want to become witches or shamans. Not weekend-witches like the women of 'Charmed', but real hard-core psychic investigators, who really want to develop themselves and who really want to achieve higher consciousness.

Topics we will discuss most:

• Psycho-active plants an drugs, like: psylocibin, MDMA (XTC), Lysergic acid (LSD), Hawaian baby woodrose (my absolute favorite at the moment), peyote, hemp, Ayahuasca, etc.
• SEX (with capitals). Witchcraft is a kind of fertility religion. How can you not discuss sex, sexual magic (or magick), etc.
• The world: What can we do to keep the world alive, prevent World War III, etc.
• Ourselves: What can we do to improve ourselves, create a better world for ourselves, protect ourselves against stupid self-righteous male chauvinist pigs and their companions.

Anyone can read what we write, but only members can post messages. Negative feedback will not be accepted. If you have nothing to write, just don't. We don't want discussions bloated with senseless remarks, and certainly not with negative feedback.

After reading the above you most be very curious and you really want the address of this super-yahoo-group of wonderfull super-hardcore withes, bitches and shamans. So the address is:

Sorry, the group is closed.

7 September 2006

Long time since I last wrote something to my weblog. I am not much of a writer, certainly not smalltalk.

Eir1986 and I have been to Indonesia. We met a lot of spiritual women and some spiritual men. There is not much that I can share to publish on a weblog. A lot of initiations, some with magic herbs, a lot of new insights.

I receive a lot of emails from many people. I do not answer all the emails, only those of people that are nice. Most emails are from boys who want to fuck with me. No offense. I don't mind if you have fantasies about me and want me. But I am more interested in girls and now I am with Eir1986.

Sometimes I like to publish an email with my answer, because I believe it can help people. I don't publish with names and emailaddresses. I do not forward emails to the people from which I publish an email. So don't bother. I am not a matchmaker agency.

Hi Gwenni. I am a girl of 16 and had an ugly experience with a boy. I thought he loved me and that we had a relationship. I offered him my virginity. Two days later everyone knew he had me. And he didn't want to speak with me anymore. It hurts. Love x.

A lot of young girls are abused in this way. When I went to school, some of my friends where abused like that.

There are girl-players who can handle the boys. Most can not. If you are a popular girl, boy's want to be with you. So they try to behave. If you are insecure and/or not popular, boys will try to abuse you.

Most girls who give in do so, because they do not want to be lonely. But sex with a boy does not bring you the desired company. If you want a relationship that lasts for more than a night, you have to be careful, specially when you are not popular. What can you do?

If you like girls, try to find a lesbian relationship. Girls are more capable in relationships than boys.

If you are not into girls, try a relationship with someone a lot older: 10 or more years. You don't have to stay with him for the rest of your live. While you are young and insecure, an older man can protect you, give you insight and can help you grow. When you get older, you probably grow apart.

When I was a schoolgirl, one of my friends had a relationship with a mathematician of 40+. He didn't look cool, but he was nice to her and helped her to pass her math-exams. Probably they fucked. Who cares?

When I was in the USA I met a girl of 18 and a spiritual teacher of 54. She was abused as a child, he took care of her. They have sex, do rituals and yoga, they grow together. What is wrong about that? Okay, you can not talk about this kind of relationship to everyone. Then you keep it secret and you have a secret relationship.

What I wrote above applies to boys to. A relationship between an older woman (30+ for example) and a young boy of 16 can be very good for the boy. Most boys would like that, but most women are afraid for the reaction of society towards such a relation. Fuck society.

An alternative is to find a boy who is not popular to. Most of them smell and don't change there clothes very often. Probably you want to avoid those. Some other lonely boys may have mental problems. But not all of them.

If none of the above strategies seem appealing to you, forget about the boys until you are mature enough to handle them. You don't feel better when you are abused.

Imagine:

You meet a woman and she says: I am a goddess. Perhaps you think: What an arrogance!

Now say to yourself:

My soul is divine.

As a divine soul I incarnated in an ape to transform this ape into a human being.

My body is de divine temple of my soul.

Together with our allies we transform Earth into a paradise.

We are gods and goddesses in ape-like bodies.

That is how Eir1986 and I see ourselves. We are goddesses.

Learn to see yourself as a goddess and behave like one. Ask yourself if a goddess would lead the live you are living. And if the answer is negative, change your live. Live as a goddess should. If you cannot do that by yourself, find yourself a coach or a teacher.

I didn't reach this level of consciousness on my own. I had many teachers, Andreas Firewolf was my primary teacher. You will find a teacher to, if you are ready to change.

20 march 2006

Long time since I last wrote something to my weblog.

From 4 february to 13 february I initiated Eir1986. Then from 6 march to 15 march Eir1986 initiated me. We had agreed, that we would go to the same kind of initiation. It was not only initiation as priestesses or witches, but also a BDSM-initiation. In february I was the goddess and Eir1986 was to become my priestess. In march Eir1986 was my goddess and she initiated me as her priestess.

First I asked her if she wanted to become my priestess, servant and slave. She said yes. Then I asked her if she was willing to proove that she was worthy to wear my collar. Then I showed her a golden necklace with an emerald, that I had bought for her. She was willing.

On the 4th of february I ordered Eir1986 to take off all her clothes. I put her under the shower and washed her. In a ritual manner I washed away all etheric dirt, all frustrations, all grief, etc. Then I gave her a chakra-massage with holy oil. (This is a magical mixture of oils made by Andreas Firewolf.) I kept her naked for nine days. Nine days long she was not allowed to speak, to eat, to desire or to come. She was only allowed to worship me and to devote herself to me. (Of course this is about devotion to my higher self or divine self, not devotion to my ego. During this initiation I performed as the goddess in a magical ritual.) Three times each day she had to sing prayers for me. Often I ordered her to give me a massage, to worship my feet or to come down on me. But she was not allowed to come, only to serve. She was not allowed to eat, but I gave her juice of several fruits. I ordered her to do four to five TRANCE-FORMATIONS each day. I choose the subjects.

On the 13th of february it was full moon and I tied her naked to a wooden beam and I whipped her severely. We had agreed, that this part of the initiation should hurt but not cause permanent dammage. This was quite difficult for me, because I love her. It also gave me the feeling of complete control. She really wanted me to whip her and I could do anything I wanted with her. I made her cry. Then I went down on her and gave her a very good orgasm. The best she had ever had, she said.

I asked her if she was willing to wear my collar. And when she said yes, I put the necklace with the emerald around her beautifull neck. She has to wear it everyday and is not allowed to wear any other necklace.

So, Eir1986 was reborn as an Aquarius with the moon in Leo, Ascendant Capricorn with Venus in house one and Jupiter on the MC.

On the 6th of march it was my turn to serve. I am quite dominant, so to become a humble slave was difficult. And it was great. Eir1986 ordered me to strip and I was happy to do so. Naked I stood in front of her and offered my body, mind and soul to her. She bathed me in a ritual way and gave me a massage with etheric oils. Then I had to serve her stark naked for nine days. I was not allowed to speak, to eat or to come. I was ordered to have no desires, but the desire to serve and to worship my goddess Eir1986. Often I was ordered to get down on her, to kiss and lick her divine feet, or to give her a massage. I had to sing and dance for her, to say prayers in her favor. One day she had a special treat for me. She invited a female friend. She ordered me to open the door stark naked, to serve her and her friend without saying a word. They talked about me and Eir1986 told her friend how much she loved me. I was not allowed to interact, I was only there to serve.

At midnight between the 14th and the 15th of march it was my turn to be whipped. Eir1986 is quite submissive, but she can be a severe mistress. She tied me to the wooden beam. She did it gently but very tight. Then she started to whip my ass and back. We had agreed that it should hurt and that she should make me cry out loud. She did it without hesitation and it hurt like hell. When I thought I could no longer endure, I entered a state of extasy. I read about this, but had never experienced something like this. When she untied me, I could not stand on my feet and I collapsed in her arms. I felt so much gratitude and love for her. And then she went down on me. For nine days I had served her and was not allowed to come, to touch myself, etc. And now she made me come, and come, and come ...

She asked me if I was willing to wear her collar: a golden necklace with a ruby. I said yes, I will. She put the necklace with the ruby around my neck and I was bound to her. I will wear her collar everyday and no other necklace will come around my neck.

So, I was reborn as a Pisces with the moon in Virgo, Ascendant Scorpion with the full moon on the MC.

29 january 2006

Dear Gwenni.

I write this in dutch, please translate it for me and put it on your site. I want your fans to know what you mean to me. It really was a good healing, last friday. feeling you was wonderfull. At the moment I don't feel great. I wish you were here. I want you to hold me and kiss me.

I would love to become a member of your coven and be initiated by you. But I am not good at relations. I am a bit of a borderline. If you want me, you should tie me up with a strong magical ritual and sexual magic. I really want to be your slave-girl.

Andreas once told me about gangs, who create a bonding by beating up new members. I feel that is something for me. You can tie me up and whip my ass. Then I want to become yours for ever.

Andreas initiated himself by hanging himself in a leather bag for nine days. Can we do something like that? An ordeal of nine days of special service to you and our lady Freya? Imagine:

I take of all my clothes and we burn them. Then I serve you naked for nine days. In this nine days we hold rituals, transform and I do whatever you tell me to do. When I pass all your tests, you tie me up and beat all the shit out of me. I will endure, I promise. Then I will pledge my soul to you and become yours for ever after. Then you give me new clothes to wear and a new identity. I also want a tattoo of the sign of our coven.

Love eir1986.

Wow. I am a little bit embarrased. You are so open and honest. I like what you write. I hope I translated it well, it was not easy. I will also publish my answer, with some hesitation. I am very open, but not that open. It is quite intimate.

I felt your intense love and longing. You cling to me like a baby clings to its mother. That is also, because not many people have been nice to you. I will not abuse your trust.

I don't want to tie you for ever. But we can bond for this live. Next live we can start all over.

Andreas also told us about the statement of Jesus: "If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all." I will be not only your mistress, but also your servant. And I will go through each and every ordeal that you 'll go through. I will whip your ass, and you will whip mine when you initiate me. And we both will be servants of lady Freya, our goddess of love.

I like the idea of an initiation of nine days. Or perhaps twelve.

Love you!

P.s. If you want to make a comment, email me. If I like your comment, I'll put it on my weblog.

28 january 2006

I had a very good session with eir1986 yesterday. After a shamanic ritual we gave eachother a healing. I felt her pain and her loneliness. We should start a coven or circle or something.

Today I feel very good, but it is very cold outside. Nice clear weather.

24 january 2006

I am back from my trip to the USA and Canada. Last weekend I had a meeting with Andreas Vuurwolf, my principal initiator. He encouraged me to renew my webpage. Looking at the old material, I laugh at myself. I am a lot wiser now.

During my trip I did meet a lot of interesting people: witches, native-american medicine-women and some medicine-men, yoga-guru's, etc. I have been initiated in some groups, one was very sexual. In later weblogs I will reveal some of it.

I have to get used to netherland. This country is so small and most people are so petty. When I look at girls of 18-23 I often see myself before I met Andreas. Most people doubt themselves, have no courage, are so affraid of what might happen if they really go for their goals. Fuck-it girls! Don't waste your time with self-doubt or self-pity. Develop yourselves! Meditate! Trance-formate! Get your initiations.

I feel the earth is changing. Andreas has the same feeling. Things are about to happen. And so many people waste precious time!

There ain't no fucking tomorrow girls, there is only today!