I Loved You

By Chibi Cat

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZAPENSTAP!

Author's Notes: I wrote this last night and I was like "Wow! This is one of the best fics I've ever written!" Now I'm looking at it and saying "What kind of crap is this?" -_-` oh well. Sorry this is such a bad fic, it was supposed to be for Zapenstap's birthday.

Warnings: Death, Angst, Short

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The moonlight peeked through the curtains of the otherwise dark room. Relena sat in a corner. Her body quaked with the force of her tears. Slowly the desperate crying turned into soft sobs and hiccups then finally ceased all together. She unfolded the small, tear stained scrap of paper she had been clutching for the last three hours. It read:

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To whom it may concern:

By the time you find this letter I will be dead. I know you are thinking I could have found a more honorable way to die, that suicide was not the answer. In all truth I searched and could find non or was foiled every time I did. There was no hope for me. The blood that saturated and poisoned my skin had long ago seeped into my mind and soul. It ate away at me, rotting me from the inside out. I am sorry but please do not mourn my death. It is what I deserved and I am content with my decision. Please, tell Relena I loved her and although I did not always make the best decisions I did it all for her…

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"I know you loved me…" Relena whispered as she scooted over to the body that was sprawled out on the floor. She closed her eyes to keep herself from crying again, knowing once she started she wouldn’t be able to stop. Things had to be said first.

"I loved you too, you know? I tried to show you just how much I loved you but you would always turn away. I know we didn’t know each other that well but… we could have gotten closer with time!"

She gasped for air to stop herself. She was getting too emotional and she wasn’t finished yet. She looked down at him and reached out to stroke his soft hair.

"We went through so much together. Through out the war you were my streangth! I never told you that, did I? You fought for me on the battle field and I fought you you with the politics. We were a team. I know you didn’t always make the right decisions but when I saw you fight Mariemaia’s troops to save me even though you barely knew me. I knew. I knew all along."

She suddenlly stood up pushing herself away from him.

"Didn’t I fight hard enough for you?" she yelled. "I tried! I really tried…but it was all in vain, as you have just proven to me. Didn’t really save anyone, did I?" she murmured sinking back to her knees again.

"We could have started over. If you had just given me the chance to get to know you! The real you… A chance to know the person who hid behind that mask…"

She ran her fingers over his cheek before lifting his head to cuddle to her chest.

"Oh, Zechs…"

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