We all know those cute little computer symbols called
"emoticons," where :) means a smile and :( is a frown.
Sometimes these are represented by :-) and :-( respectively.
Well, how about some "assicons"? >Here goes:

(_!_) a regular ass

(__!__) a fat ass

(!) a tight ass

(_^^_) a bubble ass

(_*_) a sore ass

{_!_} a swishy ass

(_o_) an ass that's been around

(_x_) kiss my ass

(_X_) leave my ass alone

(_zzz_) a tired ass

(_o^^o_) a wise ass

(_E=mc2_) a smart ass

(_$_) Money coming out of his ass