Etiquette

Critic:-

I note that it is extremely rare that a Muslim will criticize another Muslim in these debates. Presumably, the idea is to the present a "united front" against non-Muslim opposition.

A Muslim:-

While that may sometimes be an aspect, it is not really the basis for the reluctance of Muslims to talk about one another's faults. One of the most important imperatives of Islam is to avoid slander and "backbiting".

This trait may be hard to understand for some people who live in a society that encourages idle gossip and public exposure of the real and imagined shortcomings of others. Entire magazines and tabloid newspapers are devoted to this sort of mudslinging and character assassination.

"Neither backbite one another. Would one of you love to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Ye abhor that [so abhor the other]! And keep your duty to Allah." (49:12)

"Sufyan bin Abdullah (Allah be please with him) relates: ...I further said: O Messenger of Allah, what is the one thing [about me] that you consider as the most injurious to me? He touched his tongue and said: 'This.' (Reported by Tirmizi as sound).

"Anas (Allah be pleased with him) says that the Holy Prophet (peace be on him) said: On the night of the Ascension, I passed by some people who had copper nails and they were clawing their faces and their chests with them. I asked Gabriel: Who are these persons? He said: These are the people who eat the flesh of human beings [i.e. backbite] and disgrace them. (Reported by Abu Daud)

"Abu Harairah (Allah be please with him) says that the Prophet (peace be on him) has declared that everything belonging to a Muslim is unlawful to another Muslim: his blood, his honour and his property." (Reported by Muslim)

"Abu Darda (Allah be please with him) relates that the Prophet (peace be on him) said: As for a person who avoids dishonouring his brother, Allah will keep his face away from the fire of Hell on the day of judgement." (Reported by Tirmizi)

"Abdullah bin 'Amr bin Al'Aas (Allah be please with him) reports that the Prophet (peace be on him) said: The perfect Muslim is one from whose tongue and hand all Muslims are immune." (Reported by Bukhari and Muslim)

As you can see, for a Muslim to slander or dishonour a fellow Muslim is a grievous offence. That is why Muslims generally are very discrete about the shortcomings of others. However, we are sometimes dispensed from this general rule. Sheikh Nawawi (may Allah accept his works) lists 6 occasions for dispensation in _Riyadh us-Saleheen:-

1. A report to the authorities for redress of injustice.

2. To seek help in order to stop an activity which is against the principles of religion.

3. To seek a juridical opinion (fatwa) on some topic.

4. To caution Muslims about the evil consequences of someone's words or deeds.

5. To denounce a public and notorious evil doer.

6. To use an acceptable or generally known nickname so long as it is not used to humiliate the person so named (if it is unavoidable to use the nickname).

Comment:-

I think it is appropriate to quote the whole passage in the Quran:-

"The believers are naught else but brethren, therefore make peace between your brethren and be careful of your duty to Allah that mercy may be had on you. O you who believe! Let not one people deride (or ridicule) another people perchance they may be better than they, nor let women deride other women, perchance they may be better than they; and do not find fault with (or defame) your own people nor insult one another by (offensive) nicknames; evil is a bad name after faith, and whoever does not desist, these it is that are the unjust. O you who believe! Avoid most of suspicion, for surely suspicion in some cases is a sin, and do not spy nor let some of you backbite others. Does one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? But you abhor it; and be careful of (your duty to) Allah, surely Allah is Oft relenting, Merciful." 49:10-12

The following can also be added:-

"And argue not with the People of the Scripture unless it be in (a way) that is better, save with such of them as do wrong; and say: We believe in that which hath been revealed unto us and revealed unto you; our God and your God is One, and unto Him we surrender." 29:46

Note the exception.

"Revile (or abuse) not those who call on other than Allah, for then they may abuse Allah openly in their ignorance. Thus We make seemly to every nation their deeds. But unto their Lord is their return, and He will inform them of the truth of what they used to do." 6:109

"And if they argue with thee, (O Muhammad), say: I have surrendered my purpose to Allah and (so have) those who follow me. And say unto those who have received the Scripture and those who read not: Have ye (too) surrendered ? If they surrender, then truly they are rightly guided, and if they turn away, then it is thy duty only to convey the message (unto them). Allah is Seer of (His) bondmen." 3:20

"He hath already revealed unto you in the Scripture that, when ye hear the revelations of Allah rejected and derided, (ye) sit not with them (who disbelieve and mock) until they engage in some other conversation. Lo! in that case (if ye stayed) ye would be like unto them. Lo! Allah will gather hypocrites and disbelievers, all together, into hell." 4:140

"And when you see those who meddle with Our revelations, withdraw from them until they meddle with another topic. And if the devil causes you to forget, sit not, after the remembrance, with the congregation of wrong-doers." 6:68

"Endure patiently. Your endurance is only by the help of Allah. Grieve not about them; and be not distressed because of that which they devise. Verily, Allah is with those who fear (do their duty to) Him, and with those who do good."16:127-128

"Say: O People of the Scripture! Come to an agreement between us and you: that we shall worship none but Allah, and that we shall ascribe no partner unto Him, and that none of us shall take others for lords beside Allah. And if they turn away, then say: Bear witness that we are they who have surrendered (unto Him)." 3:64

"But if they turn their backs, your duty is only to convey the Clear Message." 16:82

"Say: Obey Allah and obey the Messenger; but if you turn away then it is for him to do only that wherewith he has been charged, and for you to do only that wherewith you have been charged. If you obey him, you are rightly guided. But the Messenger has no other charge but to convey the message plainly." 24:54

But also:-

"And there may spring from you a nation who invite to goodness, and enjoin right conduct and forbid indecency. Such are they who are successful.". 3:104

"And there is life for you in retaliation, O men of understanding, that ye may ward off (evil)." 2:179

"And one who attacketh you, attack him in like manner as he attacked you. Observe your duty to Allah, and know that Allah is with those who ward off (evil).". 2:194

"And We prescribed for them therein: The life for the life, and the eye for the eye, and the nose for the nose, and the ear for the ear, and the tooth for the tooth, and for wounds retaliation. But whoso forgoeth it (in the way of charity) it shall be expiation for him. Whoso judgeth not by that which Allah hath revealed: such are wrong-doers.". 5:45

"O you who believe! Be you steadfast in justice, witnesses for Allah, though it is against yourselves, or your parents, or your kindred, be it rich or poor, for Allah is nearer both than either. Follow not, then, lusts (prejudices, superstitions, passions), so as to act unjustly (or with bias); but if you swerve or turn aside, Allah is well Aware of what you do." 4:135

Critic:-

We see that many Muslims other than some Liberal Muslims are unable to discuss issues logically without ad hominem. They attack the person and the motives of those who criticise Islam. This is irrelevant to the argument.

Comment:-

You need to understand that when it comes to religion that deals in spiritual welfare and development of the person, then the knowledge, thoughts, opinions, capabilities as well as the motives, actions and interactions of a person are relevant.

We do not, therefore, believe that the opinions expressed by a person in this field are independent of his motives and actions. The motives drive the thinking and the conditioned actions lead to rationalisations. The thinking in its turn affects the motives and actions. The behaviour so modified also modifies the state of the person which modifies the behaviour. The truth or falsity of a statement is judged by these real effects. It is not a question of verbal logic but of experience and realities.

When dealing with any other subject that has no relevance to a person's life, then he may hold an opinion that is impersonal (whether right or wrong), but clearly it is then useless to him personally.

Islam sees all things as having existence and value only with respect to God and all inner and outer behaviour as having value only with respect to human development.

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